Category: Funny

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A Woman Messaged Her Tinder Matches With Quotes From ‘The Grinch’

Well, this is entertaining…

Dayna Troisi is a big fan of How The Grinch Stole Christmas and so she decided to do something very clever on Tinder.

Troisi said, “he is all of us. Like, for example, he hates people, and refuses to go out when he can’t find the perfect outfit (don’t you hate when you’re too bloated for your favorite bodysuit?). He is also emotionally stunted but good-hearted at the end of the day. Plus, he has a dog, so he can’t be that bad. So, I wondered: What would happen if I messaged my Tinder matches with quotes from The Grinch?”

Let’s see how it went, shall we?

1. Sign him up.

Photo Credit: Tinder

2. Nice recovery.

Photo Credit: Tinder

3. Not feeling it.

Photo Credit: Tinder

4. More cuffing.

Photo Credit: Tinder

5. This fella got it.

Photo Credit: Tinder

6. This guy is pretty serious.

Photo Credit: Tinder

7. This went off the rails.

Photo Credit: Tinder

8. Okay…

Photo Credit: Tinder

9. What else do you feel?

Photo Credit: Tinder

10. A poet and he knows it.

Photo Credit: Tinder

Pretty brilliant, I must say!

Have you ever done anything like this on dating apps? Tell us all about it in the comments!

The post A Woman Messaged Her Tinder Matches With Quotes From ‘The Grinch’ appeared first on UberFacts.

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Watch This ‘Saturday Night Live’ Skit About the Hell That Is Dressing Your Kids During Winter

Do you have young kiddos? If so, you know what an absolute treat it can be getting them dressed during the cold winter months! Lots of screaming, crying, fighting, and tantrum-throwing to liven up your long days!

And if you don’t have kids, you remember these days from your childhood, don’t you? I sure do. It was a constant battle between my mom and myself, no one willing to give an inch and back down. Good times!

Well, Saturday Night Live recently nailed this phenomenon in a hilarious fake Macy’s commercial about the trials and tribulations of trying to dress little kids during the winter.

The commercial starts off typically enough as a Christmas ad with happy families having a grand time.

Photo Credit: NBC

…But then the whole thing starts to go downhill pretty quickly. The kids start to complain about various issues with their clothes. “It’s too hot!” “It itches!”

And the narrator tells us that “Tis the season for wrestling your wiggly little monster into thick winter clothes.”

Photo Credit: NBC

Of course, there are winter clothes that won’t fit over any kid’s head.

Photo Credit: NBC

And there are corduroys that will…well, you’ll see…

Photo Credit: NBC

What’s in store for all the sweet little girls out there? This!

Photo Credit: NBC

She’ll love those!

And you better believe those winter jackets are so huge that no kid will be able to fit into a car seat!

Photo Credit: NBC

Are you ready to see this video in its entirety? Here you go!

Is that spot-on, or what?

Ho Ho Ho and Happy Holidays!

Stay warm out there!

The post Watch This ‘Saturday Night Live’ Skit About the Hell That Is Dressing Your Kids During Winter appeared first on UberFacts.

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15 Funny ‘Harry Potter’ Jokes That Fans Should Enjoy

We’ve got a major Nerd Alert!

I’m just kidding, I’m one of you! A Potter-head, if you will. And I got a huge kick out of these jokes that poke fun at the Harry Potter universe.

And we think you will, too.

Enjoy, all you Muggles out there!

1. How many Slytherins does it take to stir a cauldron?

Just one. He puts his wand in the cauldron and the world revolves around him.

slytherin

2. Why does Voldemort prefer Twitter to Facebook?

Because he only has followers, not friends.

3. What’s the difference between a comma and Crookshanks?

Crookshanks has claws at the end of his paws, and a comma is a pause at the end of a clause.

Crookshanks

4. Where can you find Dumbledore’s Army?

Up his sleeve-y!

5. Why is Mad-Eye Moody such a bad teacher?

Because he can’t control his pupils.

Mad Eye Moody

6. A wizard walks into a pub…

…and orders a Forgetfulness Potion. He turns to the witch next to him and says, “So, do I come here often?”

7. Two Hungarian Horntails walk into a pub…

The first one says, “Sure is hot in here.”

The second one snaps back, “Shut your mouth!”

Hungarian Horntail

8. A Muggle walks into the Hog’s Head Inn…

…with a frog on his shoulder. The barkeep says, “That’s pretty cool, where’d you get it?”

“London,” the frog croaks. “They’ve got millions of ‘em!”

9. What do you call a wizard with his hand in a thestral’s mouth?

A mechanic.

Thestral

10. Why does Professor Snape stand in the middle of the road?

So you’ll never know which side he’s on.

11. Why can’t Harry Potter tell the difference between the pot he uses to make potions and his best friend?

They’re both cauld ron.

Harry Potter Studio Tour

12. Which side of a centaur has more hair?

The outside.

13. Why does Voldemort love Nagini so much?

Because she gives him hugs and hisses.

14. Why does Neville always use two bathroom stalls?

Because he has a Longbottom.

Neville Longbottom (Harry Potter)

15. What do you call two Quidditch players who share a dorm?

Broom-mates.
===
Pretty fire jokes, right?

What did you think? What were your faves?

Let us know in the comments!

The post 15 Funny ‘Harry Potter’ Jokes That Fans Should Enjoy appeared first on UberFacts.

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15 Siblings Who Don’t Deserve Forgiveness

Some transgressions can be forgiven because we’re family – but some things are just unforgivable horror shows. Frankly, these people below should be shamed for the rest of their lives (preferably on the internet). That’s how bad they are.

Let’s be real: these 15 siblings clearly are gonna get what’s coming to them.

15. You’re living with a monster.

What my older sister does to toothpaste tubes from mildlyinfuriating

14. How can you even be mad?

My mum asked my brother to share his Easter egg with me. from mildlyinfuriating

13. That’s a pretty epic level of lazy.

my little brother was too lazy to clean up monopoly so he threw it in the trash from mildlyinfuriating

12. What kind of person could do this?

How my sister eats her pizza…. from mildlyinfuriating

11. I love how there are no other texts in between.

My brother has a habit from mildlyinfuriating

10. She’s clearly trying to kill you.

About three weeks ago my sister knocked my lamp over and broke its glass cover. Today I saw that she had placed it next to my curtain, burning a hole in it and almost starting a fire. from mildlyinfuriating

9. Cheese and crackers, anyone?

I shit you not my brother ate the ham out of all 5 Lunchables and put them back in the refrigerator from mildlyinfuriating

8. It had to be a rainy day, too.

My brother backing out of my driveway… from mildlyinfuriating

7. But the middle is the best part?

My sister, everybody. from mildlyinfuriating

6. Okay but in her defense that could happen to anyone.

What my sister did to my earbuds… from mildlyinfuriating

5. Just shove it behind the couch, it will be like it doesn’t exist.

My brother calls this cable "management" from mildlyinfuriating

4. She’s just taking one for the team.

My sister only eats the chocolate from the top container on the YoCrunch yogurts, leaving the rest of us with plain vanilla yogurt. from mildlyinfuriating

3. Who thinks keeping a lollipop clean is more important than a phone screen?

My sister is a god damn savage. from mildlyinfuriating

2. But it wasn’t empty!

My brother thinks that, by leaving half a sheet on the roll, he won’t have to change it. from mildlyinfuriating

1. This makes me twitch.

My sister, everybody. from mildlyinfuriating

 

May I never do something like this to my poor, long-suffering sister.

Has one of your siblings ever let you down on this scale? Tell us the story in the comments!

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Ryan Reynolds Made a Gin Commercial Starring the Woman From the Peloton Commercial

You’ve probably seen the holiday Peloton ad – the one that definitely didn’t go the way the company wanted. It features a wife and mother who receives an exercise bike, then goes on to document her fitness journey online.

The problem is that it sort of plays like a horror movie in which the woman is forced to act like a happy wife and mother who loves working out, but is in fact being held against her will.

Monica Ruiz, the actress, blames her eyebrows, but it turns out the odd commercial might be great for her career – because Ryan Reynolds already hired her to make a commercial for Aviation American Gin.

In it, the Peloton-gifted wife is drinking gin at a bar with her friends after (maybe?) separating from her kidnapper/spouse. Or at least recovering from her traumatic year with the Peloton.

“You are safe here,” one friend says as the women share a toast “to new beginnings.”

Ruiz drains her glass and asks for another, and all’s well that ends well, I suppose.

Most people think it’s hilarious…except Sean Hunter, who played the husband in the original ad. He isn’t as amused by the situation as everyone else.

“Five seconds of air time has created an array of malicious feedback that is all associated with my face. As it continues to be screenshot online, I wonder what repercussions will come back to me. I pride myself on being a great teacher and developing actor and I can only hope this affects neither.”

Time will tell, but I mean, maybe he’ll get a second, better commercial opportunity as well?

You never know, but as for Reynolds and Ruiz, the internet is loving the addition to the “Peloton Cinematic Universe.”

And you know, I do feel a little bad for both actors, who likely never expected that booking an innocuous Christmas ad for an exercise bike would blow up online, for better or worse. But this is who we are as a society now.

Watch your face, folks. There are repercussions for days.

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The 2020 Social Justice Kittens Calendar Is Pretty Great

This is what you really need to get 2020 started off on the right foot! These kittens are fighting for social justice, and they’re here to remind you every month next year that they’re not going to stand for society’s BS any longer.

Let’s see what these social justice warrior kittens have to say in this calendar from
Sean Tejaratchi.

1. Those pesky “facts.”

Photo Credit: Amazon

2. Forego free speech…

Photo Credit: Amazon

3. Beware.

Photo Credit: Amazon

4. Forget about your opinion.

Photo Credit: Amazon

5. Time to listen.

Photo Credit: Amazon

6. Always does.

Photo Credit: Amazon

7. Doesn’t feel safe.

Photo Credit: Amazon

8. Are you part of the problem?

Photo Credit: Amazon

9. Love rage.

Photo Credit: Amazon

10. So-called allies.

Photo Credit: Amazon

What do you think? Feel like 2020?

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Guy Makes Funny Signs to Protest Against Everyday Annoyances

Life is full of all kinds of things: new experiences, happiness…and also inconveniences. And inconveniences can be soooo frustrating, right?

Instagram user @dudewithsign has come up with a really smart way to let his frustrations show: He creates hilarious signs that he uses to protest everyday annoyances.

And why shouldn’t he? People are protesting all over the world. It’s true that most of these protests have to do with major geopolitical problems, but there’s nothing wrong with letting the world know that $15 for a salad is too much!

10. Say NO To Group Pics on Dating Apps

He’s right about this one!

9. Calling All Baristas…

Most people are okay with spelling out their name to prevent this issue.

View this post on Instagram

@starbucks

A post shared by Seth (@dudewithsign) on

8. Guac Lovers Everywhere Agree!

Who doesn’t love free guacamole?!

View this post on Instagram

@chipotle

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7. Time Changes Are Confusing

And no one likes having that strange 1-hour jet-lag.

6. What About $14.99?

Most salad-lovers agree though.

View this post on Instagram

@sweetgreen

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5. Someone Please Tell Netflix!

That we’re all still watching!

View this post on Instagram

@netflix

A post shared by Seth (@dudewithsign) on

4. One For The Chip-Lovers

No one likes to pay for air.

View this post on Instagram

@lays

A post shared by Seth (@dudewithsign) on

3. A Controversial Opinion Indeed

We’ll let the fans argue about this.

View this post on Instagram

@friends

A post shared by Seth (@dudewithsign) on

2. It’s Not A Competition But…

This opinion is technically correct.

1. A Poignant Question

Especially for those who are down on their luck.

With more than 100K likes per post, it looks like @dudewithsign has really struck a nerve. He really seems to understand the things that anger this generation, but he has a sense of humor about how to let the world know how he feels.

What annoys you? Maybe @dudewithsign will make a sign about it. Vent your annoyances in the comments section below!

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Here Are Some Funny Jokes About White Elephant Parties

Have you been to a White Elephant party before? Or perhaps you call it a Yankee Swap or a Dirty Santa party?

They’re a lot of fun – folks bring gifts to trade, and guests have the option to “steal” gifts from other people. It can get heated, and it’s even more fun when there are totally inappropriate presents involved!

If you’ve been to these parties, these will look familiar. If not, get yourself to one this year if you can!

1. You don’t say!

2. Uh oh…

3. Not gonna make it this year.

4. Some might even call it trash.

5. Might as well.

6. Swap with the Big Boss?

7. Might turn into a free-for-all.

8. Just like The Hunger Games.

9. They always dreamed of this.

10. Conspiracy theory.

11. Could be your meal ticket.

12. Mine!

13. Trying to tell you politely…

14. I’m here to file a complaint.

15. You won 2019.

Tell us all about your holiday parties this year!

How’d they go? Any drama? Any hilarity?

We’re dying to hear from you!

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Funny Tweets About the Ridiculousness of Office Holiday Parties

Working in an office can be soul-sucking, but there’s always one cool, positive thing on the horizon…the office holiday party.

They usually spin wildly out of control, and you never know what’s gonna happen on that night.

Will Bob from Accounting take off his pants again? Will Judy from Shipping and Receiving spike the eggnog? Will there be any fistfights between different departments?

You just never know!!!

1. That’s never a good thing to hear.

2. We survived…somehow.

3. Prepare yourself.

4. All by yourself.

5. Nice one!

6. Where’d this come from?

7. A perfectly fine excuse.

8. So…

9. Must’ve been one hell of a cake.

10. Standing ovation.

11. Misread the vibe on this one.

12. These are delicious!

13. Much better than a bonus, right?

14. Here we go…

15. Don’t do it!

Have you had any hilarious/ridiculous/amazing/crazy experiences at holiday parties at work?

Share your wild tales in the comments!

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Funny Tweets About the Temptation of Christmas Cookies

The Christmas season comes with a lot of familiar traditions: parties, gifts, travel, holiday movies and music…and cookies…LOTS AND LOTS OF COOKIES.

I think we’re all going to be dreaming of sprinkles for the next three months because we’re cramming so many of these babies in our mouths right now…

Let’s take a look at the tweets.

1. That’s why.

2. A perfect plan.

3. A precarious game.

4. It’s gonna get ugly.

5. You do you.

6. Good job!

7. No self-control.

8. Why am I doing this?

9. Santa’s in for a surprise.

10. Explain that one.

11. You ARE an all star!

12. They’re long gone.

13. A long process.

14. You must finish the job.

15. Tips from Mom.

Do you tend to go overboard on the cookies around this time of year?

Don’t feel bad about it! We do it, too!

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