Category: Funny

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#WhyImSingle Hashtag Might Make You Feel Better About Your Own Life…Maybe

I’ve been single for quite a while now, and I’m okay with that.

I know I have my quirks and I also know that it’s gonna take a very special someone for me to give up my independence.

And knowing is half the battle, right?

These brave souls were nice enough to get real about why they’re single. Let’s dive in.

1. That wasn’t a compliment.

In case you didn’t know.

2. That’s your best?

If you say so…

3. Never give up hope!

That call might come tomorrow.

4. Now it’s over.

Time to move on.

5. You’re lying!

That was a test.

6. That could be a problem.

Just letting you know.

7. I’m right about this!

People and their laundry…sheesh.

8. Not the one.

Not by a longshot.

9. Father always knows best.

And here’s one more example.

10. Can I clone myself?

And sleep in a cave?

11. Find your happiness.

Focus on yourself!

12. Darn right!

You nailed it!

Are you single?

If so, why?

Talk to us in the comments and spill your guts!

The post #WhyImSingle Hashtag Might Make You Feel Better About Your Own Life…Maybe appeared first on UberFacts.

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People Share the Lamest Jokes They’ve Heard About Their Names

My last name is Gilligan so I’ve heard it all.

Where’s the Skipper? Hey, little buddy. Don’t forget Mary Anne!

Enough! No more, I say!

But I guess I probably didn’t have it that bad compared to some people. Still, I heard every lame joke in the book growing up.

And so did these folks! Let’s see what kind of lame jokes they’ve had to endure because of their names.

1. Australia puns.

Totally lame, if you ask me.

2. Ouch. Sorry about that.

That must have been rough.

3. You poor thing.

I hope you’re over it now.

4. Davy Jones for the win!

No, not that Davy Jones…

5. This is bad.

And not very funny.

6. Jake the Snake!

Never gets old.

7. A real, unique name.

You do you!

8. A-A-Ron here.

That’s tough…

9. Smooth Criminal!

Young kids, look it up.

10. You just can’t win.

Still traumatized by it.

11. Well-informed bullies.

Well, that’s kind of nice, I guess.

12. Neither are very good.

But what do you expect from people?

Do you have one of those names that people seem to make fun of?

If so, tell us about the lame jokes you hear.

Do it in the comments, please!

The post People Share the Lamest Jokes They’ve Heard About Their Names appeared first on UberFacts.

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Funny and Very Personal Posts People Shared

There are a lot of positive things about social media.

Staying in touch with old friends. Keeping tabs on that ex who ruined your life. And, another big one is that people like to GET REAL on there and open up about how they’re feeling about things.

And we’re here for it!

These 13 folks opened up and spilled their guts about a bunch of different stuff. Let’s take a look!

1. Hey, I’m proud of you!

And it only took you six days!

2. You are not alone, my friend.

We’ve all been there at one point or another.

3. I think we might be soulmates.

Let’s give it a shot, okay?

4. No use in sending that kid to college.

What’s the point, right?

5. Too much alone time can be bad, FYI.

Just gotta keep an eye on it.

6. Imagine actually getting things done?!?!

Well, to each their own.

7. Yeah it is!

Porch life is where it’s at!

8. Seriously, hotels need to do lunch instead.

Bring on the burgers!

9. Times are tough…

I think we all wish we would’ve started saving earlier.

10. You can’t help yourself.

It is what it is.

11. Ice T knows what’s up.

Is the man ever wrong about anything?

12. Let’s not go there.

It’ll only get ugly…

13. I think this guy might be on to something.

Any other words of wisdom, sir?

Okay, now we want to hear from all the readers out there!

Tell us some deep and personal…if you’re up for it.

Talk to us in the comments!

Thanks fam!

The post Funny and Very Personal Posts People Shared appeared first on UberFacts.

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22 Random Tumblr Posts We Think You’ll Enjoy

Is there anything better than a collection of funny, random Tumblr posts that are sure to make you laugh?

The answer, of course, is no. The wonderful weirdos over on Tumblr spend far too much time thinking about how strange life is and creating the posts that none of us would have thought of.

So here’s to you, all of you wonderfully strange internet writers! You’re magical, egalitarian and, above all else… completely random.

1. Witchy woman

The power of goth compels thee.

https://royal-mortician.tumblr.com/post/175505435976/why-do-teenage-girls-go-through-a-witchoccult

2. It follows

This reads an awful lot like a spooky clown killer trying to play off the time they got caught.

https://babbydriver.tumblr.com/post/612334712174903296/last-year-i-went-out-to-see-the-new-it-and-stopped

3. Definitive answers

We need to have some words about this.

https://sir-adamus.tumblr.com/post/85943736666/broughttoyoubytheletterq-theleeryone

4. Dunces and dragons

If only table top gaming was really as badass as my fundamentalist upbringing led me to believe.

https://mirrorfalls.tumblr.com/post/173915337286/fundamentalist-fearmongering-video-this-dungeon

5. Dirty jobs

My guess is “boy oh boy there are some good paychecks.”

https://captainignis.tumblr.com/post/85512717503/beksboys-sometimes-i-wonder-what-the-voice

6. Jokes of the undad

You get mad, but you will 100% say this to someone else some day.

https://kippeiii.tumblr.com/post/107616178992/hellaiiyo-we-were-driving-past-a-cemetery-and-my

7. Greek life

This story didn’t get passed down for 2,400 years just to get lost with Millennials, calm down.

https://pedantricks.tumblr.com/post/89000706711/akupitiyo-nodaybuttodaytodefygravity

8. Vaporwave

Sounds cool as heck to me, tbh.

https://hem1ock.tumblr.com/post/174106080186/indiecup-turing-tested-i-was-looking

9. Big and round

Throw that ass in a circle.

https://tenfoldgambit.tumblr.com/post/173962960477/gaymilesedgeworth-gaymilesedgeworth-i-woke-up

10. Me want food

This one comes with a lovely audio presentation.

https://ikimaru.tumblr.com/post/167391473080/the-other-greengrass-girl-dat-goat-boi-my

11. Spicy comments

Ok but how do you really feel? Be honest.

https://thatbollyknickers.tumblr.com/post/171853909436

12. Gotta kill ’em all

He’d never say a word about it…

https://ymawgat.tumblr.com/post/176862048051/paper-mario-wiki-paper-mario-wiki-game

13. Bombshell burial

Hey, UK, everything alright over there?

https://thetomska.tumblr.com/post/173671245888/tumblr-im-begging-you-please-let-me-reblog-the

14. Wake up, moon sheeple

I definitely have a firm grasp on correlation vs. causation.

https://hanniepee.tumblr.com/post/111776394335/nickthegeekbear-hotcommunist-rehlaxe-have-you

15. Bi-lociraptor

They say their vision is based on cuteness.

https://smilingformoney.tumblr.com/post/139387035471/phoenixfire-thewizardgoddess-shinobicyrus

16. Pie, pie, pie

I didn’t ask for this and I don’t want it in my head.

https://flame-cat.tumblr.com/post/172795065209/im-bout-to-trigger-yalls-fight-or-flight-reflexes

17. Linguistic evolution

“B’mood” sounds Shakespearean, honestly.

https://admiralrainbow.tumblr.com/post/164833571443/desivampire-batbitequeen-desivampire-we

18. I sure hope it does

There are somewhere around 500 million Tumblr users, btw.

https://reptro.tumblr.com/post/173963714591/e-seal-vt102-e-seal

19. Disappoint-mint

If you can’t take the heat, get out of the freezer.

https://skeleslime-phantom.tumblr.com/post/172472155959/popular-opinion

20. Mood swings

My reformation was brief but refreshing.

https://pukicho.tumblr.com/post/169899403030/rocketrandom66-pukicho-rocketrandom66

21. Vaporized

I didn’t realize this is what they meant when they said smoking kills.

https://sydnieglover.tumblr.com/post/173969021339/gamarai-spaffy-jimble-swarnpert-if-you

If those 22 posts alone aren’t worth the GDP of Grenada then I simply don’t know what is. Thank you Tumblr for your great service to mankind!

What, in your opinion, is peak Tumblr?

Tell us in the comments.

The post 22 Random Tumblr Posts We Think You’ll Enjoy appeared first on UberFacts.

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Funny Posts From Folks Who Don’t Mind Getting Personal

Peple use social media for a bunch of different reasons.

Some like to keep in touch with friends and relatives all over the world, some like to keep up with current events and news, and then there’s a segment of the population that just wants to get some stuff off their chest.

It’s a sounding board of sorts, so it makes perfect sense to me!

And these people had some funny things to get off their chests.

Let’s see what they had to say.

1. I’m with you on this one.

What did the horses ever do to anyone?

2. You never forgot, did you?

At least you have your priorities straight. Good for you!

3. I think this might describe me as well.

There’s just no getting around it.

4. It’s never too late!

Just look at these examples.

5. The pressure is on now.

You better not mess this one up.

6. Well, here’s a hot take.

I never thought of it that way…

7. Think about it!

I think you might be right about this, sir.

8. It took you a while to get there.

But now, here you are!

9. I wanna hear all about this!

This is what the ultimate petty revenge looks like, people.

10. I think I can make this work.

Hey, why not just go for it?!?!

11. Sometimes, it’s all you can manage to say.

Just let it go…

12. You better believe it!

I’m a big fan.

Do you have any confessions you’d like to make?

If so, spill your guts in the comments.

We can’t wait to hear from you! Get it!

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12 Times When People Had Really Bad Restaurant Etiquette

If you’ve ever worked in the service industry, you know the drill: you’re gonna have your fair share of horrible customers who are rude, crude, and ignorant.

And you just gotta deal with them because you know that when one walks out the door, another one isn’t too far behind.

But still…these people really suck.

And we’re about to see some really bad examples of what I’m talking about.

Let’s see what these jerks are up to now…

1. Ma’am, you need to go back and check your math.

Just trust us on this one.

Math is hard. from insanepeoplefacebook

2. This one is pretty bad.

What a total jerk!

I can’t believe people can be this stupid. Found this on Twitter and thought it would fit here. from facepalm

3. I’d ban these people from my restaurant forever.

This is so bad.

Left on my co-workers table from trashy

4. And here we have another total a**hole.

What is wrong with people?

Latina waitress received racist note instead of tip from iamatotalpieceofshit

5. Maybe you just need to stay home?

I think that would be the best idea for everyone.

This was posted in as restaurant facebook group from trashy

6. Well, isn’t that adorable?

Why can’t parents control their children? At least a little bit?

A group of kids filled it up and the parents shouted at customers attempting to complain from trashy

7. No underage drinking, sorry.

Also, that’s YOUR problem, young people.

My friend waited on two underage kids who tried to order drinks. Stiffing servers has always made someone a bad person, but during a pandemic when benefits have run out and restaurant employees are struggling more than they already did? Despicable. from trashy

8. Entitled is one way to put it.

I think that’s a polite way of describing these folks. Just stay home!

Decades of "the customer is always right" has created the most entitled idiots in human history. from facepalm

9. Makin’ a mess and not even caring.

The rudeness is strong with these folks.

My aunt and her friend took me to dinner. These 10 lovely people sat next to us, and didn’t even leave a tip! from iamatotalpieceofshit

10. You should be tipping me!

Sorry, it doesn’t work that way.

Seen on a Facebook post on how people should tip their servers 20% from JustBootThings

11. Jacka** overload with these customers.

People like this shouldn’t be allowed outside of the house.

The “tip” my friend got. from trashy

12. Dirty diaper? Really?

Some people will never learn.

My cousin just posted this on Facebook. She is a waitress at Outback and this was left behind. from trashy

Ugh…sometimes, people are really the worst.

Do you have any of your own restaurant horror stories?

If so, tell us about them in the comments. Thanks in advance!

The post 12 Times When People Had Really Bad Restaurant Etiquette appeared first on UberFacts.

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A Cop Learned the Hard Way That Sometimes Asking for Proof Backfires

I don’t know anything about the world of over-the-road trucking, but apparently there are pretty strict rules for how to log your time, when and how often you have to stop, and the like. This guy doesn’t like having to pull off the highway every time he has to use the restroom, so he’s devised a different sort of ritual that works.

A little bit of background for anyone, like me, who needs it.

This malicious compliance has brought to you by my trip from Chicago, IL to Los Angeles, CA.

Background: I’m an over the road truck driver and most of the time, it’s more convenient for me to do my “business” on the highway shoulder. I don’t have to drive around & around just to park to use the restroom. Just a quick 30 second emergency stop, do my business (either on the side of the road or empty bottles that I’m saving up [gotta do what you gotta do when you’re on the road]), then off driving again. I’m sure I’m not the only over the road truck driver who have done these, it’s very common.

Side note: According to FMCSA, by law, we have to carry log books to calculate our driving & on duty time. This is relevant to the story.

He either pees on the side of the road (if no one is about) or pees in an empty bottle and stores it to throw away later. Every time he stops he logs his time off the road, as required, but the quick stops don’t add up to as much down time, allowing him to travel further without a break.

On to the story:

This happened just a few hours ago somewhere in I-40 WB in New Mexico. I was suddenly in need to relieve myself badly, so as usual, I pulled over to a clean, wide highway shoulder, then I put my log book to “Off Duty”.

Note: this isn’t my first time today doing my business.

I have a habit of being very meticulous with my driving time. Which means, when I’m not doing anything, even for 30 seconds, I put my time in off duty. I tried to save as much driving time as possible, those multiple 30 seconds can add up to a lot to avoid doing 34 hours reset too soon.

I looked at the passenger side window & sees multiple cars passing by. Turns out, there’s a road where cars drive by on the side of the highway. Doing my business on the highway shoulder, nope! Instead, I did the alternate route, do it in a bottle, seal it, and stow it for trash later.

On one of these stops, an officer pulled him over and asked to see his log book, so the trucker, of course, complied.

Just as I finish doing my business, I heard a knock on my passenger door. Very weird, because this is at the highway shoulder, where no one should randomly be walking around. I stow away the bottle and go look who it is and it’s a cop. I was thinking, crap, this isn’t happening.

I switched my log book to “On Duty – Inspection” and go answer the cop. Before I could say anything, the cop asked me to see my log book (it’s part of their job to check whether we comply to the rules or not) so I show it to him. The graph looks like a heart monitor, as I was relieving myself probably 4 or 5 times per day (tiny bladder problem).

The officer had some questions, namely that the trucker was stopping for 30 seconds to a minute every hour. He was suspicious that he was falsifying his records.

The trucker explained that he had a small bladder that required more pit stops, but the officer wasn’t buying it, and asked for proof if the trucker wanted to avoid a ticket.

The cop questioned why I was off duty for 30 seconds to 1 minute every 2-3 hours almost everyday (electronic log book can be backtracked up to 14 days). I explained to him that I have to relieve myself every 2-3 hours, give or take. The cop didn’t believe me and assume that my truck had a problem, that’s why I have to stop every 2-3 hours. I repeated myself about my bladder issue but the cop still didn’t believe me. Instead, he said:

-Cop: Unless you have proof that you’re actually relieving yourself, I’m afraid I have to give you a ticket for false usage of log book.

Cue malicious compliance.

Proof, the trucker had, though the cop wasn’t expecting the exact form it would take.

I told the cop to wait a moment and went back inside my cabin. I grabbed every single bottle of urine that I’ve been collecting today and the previous day (I haven’t had the chance to throw it away), put it in a plastic bag, and for extra measure, grabbed the newest one out of the plastic bag (it was still warm). I showed the whole bag to the cop, plus the warm bottle, told him it’s the newest one I just did a few seconds ago, and asked if he would like to hold it for further inspection.

The cop had the mixed look of disgust & horror. He was literally gagging, so I put back the evidence back inside my truck so he can recover.

The rest of the conversation went about as well as expected, since the guy didn’t end up getting a ticket (and he got a laugh, instead).

Then the cop says:

“I was expecting doctor’s note or something like that. What you showed me was disgusting!”

-Me: But you asked for proof that I was, in fact, relieving myself.

I was holding back my laughter so hard that my cheeks started to hurt. Then he gave me back my log book and told me to have a good day, then drives off. Have a good day, indeed!

I took an extra 1 minute on the shoulder to laugh until I’m satisfied, then I’m off to drive again.

File this one under: be careful what you ask for.

Or maybe: always remember to think ahead and keep a little proof on hand, just in case.

Either way, thanks for the giggles, good sir! Safe driving!

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13 People Shared Their Hilariously Awkward Photos From Growing Up

We all have painful, awkward, and embarrassing photos from our younger years.

And don’t try to say that you don’t! Because if you do, we’ll already know you’re lying!

But at least yours haven’t been put on social media for the whole world to see. These folks aren’t so lucky…

Take a look at some hilariously uncomfortable photos from yesteryear and try not to laugh too hard

1. This is just not fair on any level.

You can tell by their faces how they feel about this situation…

My brother got to have a cool military costume for Halloween. I was stuck as Donald Duck. Early 90s. from blunderyears

2. I think you were doing a great job!

And I have so many questions…

I don’t even know what happened in 6th Grade from blunderyears

3. Elvis NEVER left the building.

I’m impressed that you made that suit yourself. Bravo!

Late 70’s. No idea what I was thinking. Made the suit myself. from blunderyears

4. I bet you didn’t get picked on at all.

Am I right about that?

My childhood was destined to be a rough one… from blunderyears

5. The Spice Girls, reimagined.

You nailed it! Kind of…

Just saw another post here featuring a Spice Girls poster in the background. Reminded me of when we thought we totally nailed our Halloween group costume back in ’98. from blunderyears

6. Go ahead and show them off!

Really, Mom? You thought that was a good idea?

My mom insisted I show off my braces. I think she was hoping for better results. from blunderyears

7. Flowbee for the win!

That thing needs to make a comeback.

1995, age 10. I loved that dress and turtleneck combo and wore it everywhere. My mom cut my hair with a Flowbee at home. from blunderyears

8. You look like Inspector Gadget to me.

And that’s not an insult!

I had embraced my nerdy outcast status and went to school like this, sadly the trench coat was soon banned after ’99 from blunderyears

9. What look were you trying to go for?

Robin Hood? LARPer?

1993 Senior pic, I wore those boots to HS the entire year. Iowa Winter and all. from blunderyears

10. This is the most ’90s thing I’ve ever seen.

And I salute you, my friend!

My first day of school, 1992. from 90s

11. I’m glad I missed out on the JNCO jeans phase.

It really didn’t age well at all.

My mom just wanted a nice picture in Paris from blunderyears

12. Mullets are never a bad idea.

On second thought…

My dad always thought this haircut looked incredible on me. My mom thought the shirt was incredible. Looking back at 2nd grade me is incredible. I’m a female. from blunderyears

13. Wow. This is something else.

You are so brave for sharing this…

I was really into American Girl Dolls and begged my mom to let me do a cover shoot at the store from blunderyears

Now it’s your time to shine!

In the comments, share some funny pics with us from your childhood.

We promise we won’t laugh at you too much!

The post 13 People Shared Their Hilariously Awkward Photos From Growing Up appeared first on UberFacts.

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Funny Bar Signs That Might Lure You Inside for a Few Drinks

Coming up with something funny to say on a sign outside a bar is tough.

The ultimate goal is to get customers to walk inside and wet their whistles and you know these places have a lot of competition, so their zingers better be good.

I was just in Chicago last week and let me tell you, the people writing the sidewalk signs there were ON POINT.

Here are some good bar signs that we think you’ll get a kick out of. Take a look.

1. Now that is COLD.

Be careful, you don’t want to get frostbite!

2. Oh great, there’s LSD in one of the bottles!

Well, at least it will be an adventure!

3. They’re not wrong about this one.

It might even be the solution you’ve been looking for…

4. You’re right, adulting is hard.

No doubt about that!

5. I like this little motto!

Never heard that one before!

6. Can I please live here?

No, you have to go home once in a while. Sorry…

7. The Bieber rage out there is real.

Don’t mess with these people!

8. I see what you did there!

Totally inappropriate…and hilarious!

9. Avoid real life at all costs!

It’s just not worth it!

10. The only 3 Bs you’ll ever need.

But how do you rank them…?

11. Vino is life for some…

Are you one of them?

12. Let us all take a moment to remember 2020…

Now get out there and have some fun!

Have you seen any funny bar signs on the street lately that made you want to stop in and have a cold one?

Share some pics with us in the comments.

We’d love to hear from you!

The post Funny Bar Signs That Might Lure You Inside for a Few Drinks appeared first on UberFacts.

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People Talk About the Weird Food Combinations They Enjoy

You know what I grew up eating that some folks think is weird?

Well, I’ll tell ya…salami wraps with cream cheese in the middle.

I know it might sound weird, but trust me, they are delicious!

Do you have any weird food combos that other people think are strange?

These folks on AskReddit sure do! Let’s take a look.

1. All about the textures.

“Mac and cheese, then mixed with apple sauce.

I mean, apples and cheese are a very classic mix, so this just works.

I like to mix at the last minute so the hot and cold texture stays too.”

2. Sounds kinda gross.

“Ranch on spaghetti.

It’s really no different than dipping pizza into ranch, but people get grossed out when I do it.”

3. Do your own thing.

“I like mayo on steak and cheese hoagies.

Apparently a lot of people think that is disgusting, but I love it.

I also love putting habanero flakes on steamed vegetables, and horseradish on pierogies and kielbasa.”

4. Your favorite.

“Cinnamon on microwaved grilled cheese was my favorite as a young kid with far too much responsibility over what I ate.

Instant mashed potatoes with American cheese and honey was another big one. (I stopped eating meat at a young age and my mother wouldn’t make separate non meat meals).

In college a friend made me try her nasty looking breakfast and it was fantastic. Egg and cheese on a bagel with cream cheese.”

5. No thanks.

“Dipping raw pasta (usually spaghetti) into butter and eating it.

Crunchy and smooth at the same time.”

6. What?!?!

“Chocolate milk in chili.

Was dared to mix the two when I was in first grade, and I’ve been doing it ever since.”

7. A gift from God.

“But some people I’ve told about it think applesauce and pretzels sounds gross.

I think it’s a gift from God!”

8. For hot summer days.

“Crisp , cold watermelon and feta cheese, especially on hot summer days.

Picked that up on a vacation to Egypt once and fell in love.

But anyone I recommend it to looks at me with disgust.”

9. A strange combo.

“Scrambled eggs with chocolate added.

The chocolate goes great in Coca-Cola too.”

10. NOT WEIRD.

“I always get s**t for eating chips (fries) with baked beans and beef gravy.

It’s delicious but people can’t get their head around it.

Also baked beans straight from the can. That’s another I get b**ched at for. They are already cooked and actually taste better cold.

It’s not weird.”

11. Better than it sounds.

“Salted cantaloupe, bacon, and cheddar cheese in a tortilla wrap.

It is better than it sounds.”

12. Don’t get upset, people.

“Cheese Burger with sauerkraut, no bun.

Just beef patty, melted cheese on top, and sauerkraut on top of that. I might be inclined to add some mustard, but otherwise it’s fine as it is.

Most people don’t like sauerkraut to begin with, but using it as a topping for a burger seems to really make people upset.”

13. Sorry, New Jersey.

“Ketchup on pizza don’t ask but depending on the pizza it tastes like heaven.

Distant screaming can be heard from the direction of New Jersey.”

14. Uh uh.

“I put ketchup on my macaroni and cheese. Or barbecue sauce.

Adds a little tang because macaroni can be a tad boring.

Everyone I know is disgusted by this. I don’t care because it’s f**king fantastic.”

15. An acquired taste.

“I don’t normally tell people about my sardine salad sandwiches because sardines are an acquired taste that most don’t want to acquire.

Sardines, chopped green olives, chopped celery, mayo, hot sauce.

Stir it up until its uniform, then put it between two slices of toast.”

16. Not sure about this one…

“I love to put applesauce on my pizza.

The few people that I’ve convinced to try it love it, but it’s a huge hurdle to get over.”

Okay, it’s time for you to spill your guts…

Tell us about the weird food combinations that you like.

Do it in the comments, por favor!

The post People Talk About the Weird Food Combinations They Enjoy appeared first on UberFacts.