Epic Text Thread About Cake Decorating, Lies & a Girl Named Trisha Goes Viral

Meet Josh, who is apparently a genius with cakes!

Photo Credit: reddit

Josh is texting with his “friend” Trisha.

And Trisha is not buying Josh’s bulls**t about cakes.

Photo Credit: reddit

Oh Josh, don’t try to convince Trisha that you did anything to that cake.

She clearly knows you’re lying.

Just own up to it.

Photo Credit: reddit

Oh. You doubled down?

And…. yep!

Trisha totally called you on it.

Photo Credit: reddit

Wait… you’re tripling down?

Has that ever been attempted in the history of lying about baking and/or decorating cakes?!

Photo Credit: reddit

You do realize that Trisha is completely immune to your attempts at making her feel bad, right?

She does not give ONE SINGLE F**K about your feelings.

What I’m saying is Trisha will destroy you if you keep giving her the chance.

Photo Credit: reddit

Wait WHAT?!?!

You’re quadrupling down?

Has that ever been attempted in the history of lying about baking and/or decorating birthday cakes for nieces?!?!?

Photo Credit: reddit

Oh Josh.

Josh, Josh, Josh…

You know what you have to do, right?

Photo Credit: reddit

No. NO!!!!

Trying to confuse Trisha isn’t what you’re supposed to do!

Trisha is CLEARLY much, much, much, much, much smarter than you.

Like, sooooooooo much smarter.

She is not to be f**ked with.

Photo Credit: reddit

Best to come clean.

Better late than never!

Photo Credit: reddit

I don’t know buddy… looks like you’ve still got a shot with Trisha!

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10 Secrets Starbuck Employees Want You To Know

I. Love. Starbucks!

I know how ridiculously expensive it is to go there almost daily… but I still do it because – and I cannot overstate this enough – the coffee is AMAZING.

Running over 24,000 retail stores, Starbucks ranks high on many people’s lists of the best coffee around. But have you ever thought beyond the cup and noticed the actual people behind the magic of that espresso pour?

Here are a few behind-the-scenes secrets of how Starbucks makes their magic bean juice.

Photo Credit: Pexels

1. Green aprons have meaning

You may think the grass green aprons are tied to the branding colors of Starbucks, but that color goes a little further. Think about a hospital. You might see people in blue scrubs, green scrubs, and white coats. It often correlates to status or position. Starbucks adopted a similar technique to help their senior members stand out. According to another partner,

“Black aprons were given during a time when something called a Coffee Master program was in effect. People with those aprons worked very hard to learn everything about coffee through Starbucks. Starbucks had a program partners could receive certification through that involved lots of courses and training and coffee tastings. They’re the people to ask about types of coffee beans and teas. It’s also an indicator they’ve been with Starbucks a while because the program has been cut, at least in the U.S.”

Photo Credit: Pexels, Negative Space

2. Beans can be green, too

“Green Beans” are new employees of Starbucks. Those wide-eyed newbies are a part of the company-wide training program to keep turnover low. Each Green Bean is paired with a senior employee who shows them the ropes of all things coffee. This is a big job for trainers! Starbucks finds that the more dedicated and patient the senior member, the longer the retention of the new employees.

3. Don’t call them baristas

The Starbucks company refers to its people as partners. You might wonder why the professionalism of the boardroom makes an appearance at the counter. Well, the execs actually use this terminology correctly:

“We’re referred to as ‘partners’ because a year into our employment, we get a small percentage in the company, so we’re all stock partners,” says AJ, a partner in Florida.

And that’s not all. Partners receive health care and 401k benefits, and in some areas can cash in for courses at an online university. Not too shabby!

4. Funny names are, well, not funny

I’m sure the partners of Starbucks have heard every possible answer when they ask, “What’s your first name for your order?”

But when it comes to names such as Superman, Batman, and “Daddy”, the baristas don’t want to hear it. So much so, that you may never hear your fake name called – they will simply read off the drink order. Be unique, give your real name.

5. “…Where everybody knows your name.”

Hearing the Cheers theme song? I’m sure you have, when walking into your favorite Starbucks to order for your Venti, half-caff, soy Latte, not one-degree over 120. Which, of course, they are already making before you hit the counter to order. And as they ask you how your daughter’s prom went and how “Johnny” did at the basketball game, it makes you warm and fuzzy inside that they remembered. All of this is what Starbucks strives for — “customer connections.” It’s all about being genuine, and employees are actually rated on this.

6. They are not “Coffee Artists”

Coffee art is all the rage, from four-leaf clovers to simple hearts made in latte foam. Partners can make these on request, but it isn’t their forte. Because of the size and shape of their pitchers, the milk froth isn’t at spec for beautiful designs. So save the special requests for your drink, not the foam.

7. Don’t fret about drink sizes

Venti? Grande? What are these sizes? After all these years, it is still completely normal for customers to be confused. But don’t fret, the partners won’t hold it against you. They understand they have been criticized for these faux-Italian terms, and if you order a small or large, they will still get you the right size.

8. Revenge is best served decaffeinated

No partner of Starbucks would ever mess with your brew in a bad way. But it has been said that rude customers sometimes feel a little less than energized after finishing their supposedly high-octane venti. If so, they may have been subject to “decaffing.” When your attitude really annoys the barista, they may swap  your beloved caffeine with decaf.

Ouch.

 9. Dog-friendly

Starbucks is dog-friendly, at least in the drive-thru. They can provide a free puppacino to the four-legged friend in your back seat – all you need to do is ask! The only ingredient: whipped cream. A delicious treat for any dog, and it helps the employees to alleviate the temptation of petting the furry friends. For safety/health regulation reasons, they can’t touch the dogs, but they can give them a treat!

10. Employee Bean Perks!

Forget the 401k package and stock shares – bring on the FREE coffee! This may be one of the biggest perks for employees and also the biggest downfall. Whether the employees are trying new drinks or refreshing themselves = after filling orders, a new employee’s caffeine intake can skyrocket! How do they sleep at night?

“On days I don’t work, I still drink one to four cups a day or I’ll get a splitting headache,” M (a partner) says. “On days that I work, it can be the same to more, but the caffeine doesn’t help with alertness anymore. It’s lost its benefit.”

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Apparently, Caffeine May Cause Headaches… And Also Help Cure Them

Before you reach for a cup of coffee to alleviate your headache, did you know caffeine could actually make it worse?

Yes, we all want fast relief, but here’s the thing: not all headaches are created equal. Most pain relievers do contain a small dose of caffeine, though, so…where does that leave us, exactly?

Photo Credit: Pexels, Nathan Crowley

Before we dive into how caffeine works, let’s talk about the causes of a headache. A headache is essentially a tightening of blood vessels, muscles, and nerves in the head and neck. This can be caused by stress, high blood pressure, anxiety, and more. Other reasons are generally secondary, such as a concussion or dehydration.

For the run of the mill headaches, caffeine can release this tension and lower inflammation – but when you ingest caffeine in excess (through medication or coffee), those same symptoms can resurface. Here’s the thing: caffeine affects everybody differently. So if even though a cup of coffee cures my headaches toot-sweet, it may make yours even worse.

A high caffeine intake constricts blood vessels, and when the vessels open back up a rebound effect can occur. Or on the flip side, muscles and nerves can over-tighten, leaving the headache worse. It all depends on the unique chemical reactions happening in your body.

Ouch.

So what can you do?

Caffeine is not a one-size-fits-all solution. Each person has a unique chemical makeup and they should be aware of how caffeine interacts with their bodies. According to Kiran Rajneesh, who is the director of the neurological pain division at the Wexner Medical Center at Ohio State University, “Some people are more genetically predisposed to be sensitive to caffeine.”

There are other natural remedies for headaches, such as a cold compress, a nap, or quiet time in a dark room, that can help those with a caffeine sensitivity. You may also want to avoid nicotine, alcohol, and prolonged screen time.

What about those who can fight headaches with caffeinated beverages?

Photo Credit: Pexels, Breakingpic

Great question. First of all, good for you! But there are some caveats…

You should remain cautious of the type of drink you choose and the amount. For example, there’s caffeine in coffee, sodas, and energy drinks – but energy drinks have additional agents called neurostimulants that can wreak more havoc than good.

Rajneesh advises against energy drinks because “neurostimulants…can worsen your headaches.”

Coffee contains around 106 to 164 milligrams of caffeine per 5-ounce cup. Most sodas have less, capping out around 38 to 46 milligrams per 12-ounce can, but are higher in sugars and other chemicals. Coffee or tea seem to be the safest bets if you are trying to help a headache.

The best remedy depends on the person.

So what does all this mean? It means all people are different and what works for one person may not for another. If you track your headaches and find caffeine worsens them, try other forms of medication like ibuprofen or aspirin. If you experience chronic headaches, it’s best to consult with a physician. Don’t forget though – simple things like drinking more water and sticking to a better sleep schedule can alleviate tension headaches as well.

Don’t forget to take care of yourself. It may seem silly, but it is totally possible for headaches to be caused my lifestyle habits rather than medical issues – so a little self-care can go a long way!

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Costco’s $6,000 Doomsday Food…

Costco’s $5,000 Doomsday Food kit gets your family through year one of the apocalypse. The kit is delivered as two pallets of boxes that together weigh 1,800 pounds. To keep neighbors in the dark, Costco promises everything is “packaged discreetly.” The some products expire in 30 years.

10+ Tweets About Pizza That’ll Make You Say “Yep, Same”

Holy Mother of God, I love pizza so much! It’s pretty much the greatest thing EVER.

1. I felt a great disturbance in the oven…

2. Pizza is the role model everyone should strive to be more like.

Photo Credit: Twitter: @BestProAdvice

3. Make. It. Happen.

4. It’s a cons-pizza-cy.

Photo Credit: Twitter: @feralgear

5. We know that feeling all too well.

Photo Credit: Twitter: @SheaSerrano

6. It’s the pinnacle of fun.

7. Remember to stay humble.

Photo Credit: Twitter: @pizzaminati

8. It’s an important decision.

Photo Credit: Twitter: @Logan__Holmes

9. Is it a mood if I feel that way all the time?

10. I’d complain way more about not getting to eat pizza.

Photo Credit: Twitter: @NataliePerk

11. Can’t have one without the other.

Photo Credit: Twitter: @SahBabii

12. Celebs are people, too.

Photo Credit: Twitter: @Sam_Posts

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Study Confirms That Bad Diets Are Now Killing More People Than Smoking

Did you know that poor diet is responsible for killing roughly 11 million people worldwide? That number sounds staggering, but it’s true. We as a society are eating wayyy too much salt, meat, and sugar, and it’s collectively killing us.

Well, now we have even more proof. In a new study, researchers looked at the diets of people in 195 countries and estimated the impact of poor diet on the risk of death from such ailments as diabetes, heart disease, and specific kinds of cancers. The study also looked at the number of deaths from smoking and drug use.

Photo Credit: pxhere

The lead author of the study, Ashkan Afshin of the University of Washington, said, “This study shows that poor diet is the leading risk factor for deaths in the majority of the countries of the world.” Afshin added that poor diets are “a larger determinant of ill health than either tobacco or high blood pressure.”

Photo Credit: Max Pixel

The research showed that the countries with the best diets and with the lowest rates of diet-related diseases are Spain, Israel, France, and Japan. In the study, the United States ranked 43rd.

Afshin said that countries where people eat a diet that resembles the Mediterranean diet see the lowest rates of diet-related deaths. This diet sees a high intake of fruits, vegetables, nuts and healthy oils.

There is a huge disparity around the world in food consumption, as 800 million people don’t have enough to eat, while on the other hand, 1.9 billion people are overweight.

Photo Credit: pxhere

It’s a complicated issue that gets even more difficult when you consider that if everyone on Earth decided to eat a healthy, balanced diet all the time, there wouldn’t be enough fruits and vegetables to go around, and they would eventually run out.

The authors of the study admit that coordinated, global efforts are needed to address these pressing problems.

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Coffee Experts Share the Secrets to Making the Perfect Cup of Joe at Home

We all love a truly well-brewed cup of coffee, but having to pay upwards of $4/cup at a coffee shop is definitely not great if you’re trying to save money. That issue only gets worse if you’re the type of person who needs more than one cup a day. So what’s a budget-conscious coffee lover to do?

If you’ve got the time and the willingness to learn, below are some expert tips on how to feel as if you’re sitting in a coffee shop without leaving your kitchen.

Get Your Ratios Right

Image Credit: Pixabay

Though the experts don’t 100% agree, they get close enough for you to experiment and decide what you think is perfect – for a hot brew, somewhere between 1 part coffee and 15-17 parts water.

Water Matters

Image Credit: Pixabay

If the tap water where you live has an odd taste or smell, try a filter or switch to bottled water. Or, if you want to get fancy, Third Wave Water is a mineral supplement popular among the experts that supposedly aids in coffee extraction and flavor.

The temperature of the water also has to be right – coffee shops brew between 195 and 205 degrees, and most affordable home brewers never even get close.

“Even if you’re starting with really high-quality coffee that’s fresh, ground fresh, and your ratios are right, if you’re not getting to the right temperature you’re never going to extract some of the more dynamic flavors of the coffee,” says Emily Rosenberg, senior educator at Stumptown Coffee Roasters. “I think that’s why we’ve pushed, as an industry, the pour-over method because most people have a way of heating water. Even if it’s just a pot on a stove it’s going to make a huge difference.”

Keep Your Equipment Clean

Image Credit: Pixabay

Michael Phillips of Blue Bottle Coffee Company issues a reminder that coffee extracts oil, which can make your carafe super dirty over time.

“I would bet 90% of the carafes you brew coffee into right now are dirty enough to the point of being able to taste it in the cup. People don’t realize how often and thoroughly they should be cleaning equipment.”

Invest in a Scale

Image Credit: Pixabay

The measurements on coffee makers and carafes are odd, but unless you’re some kind of savant, eyeballing isn’t the best course of action, either, says Rosenberg.

“I liken a lot of the things with coffee prep to cooking or especially baking. You can not follow a recipe and get different results every time you bake a cake. You can follow a recipe that uses volume measurements that’s not gonna be quite as accurate, or you can pull out your scale and really hit the mark on predicting what’s going to come out.”

And Jeremy Lyman, co-founder of Birch Coffee, chimed in, as well.

“If you look at the carafe at the lines that say three, four cups ― those aren’t actual cup sizes, and that can be very confusing. Especially because they don’t tell you they’re not real cups. I think they’re considered five-ounce cups. I don’t know why they do it that way, they just do.”

A Coffee Grinder Isn’t a Bad Idea, Either

Image Credit: Pixabay

When asked whether he would ever use pre-ground coffee, Bailey Manson of Intelligentsia Coffee replied, “if I was going camping.”

Which is to say, it’s best to grind and, what’s more, to do it every day.

“If you leave the loaf of bread and cut a slice each piece is going to be delicious, but the piece you slice within in an hour is going to be stale. Grinding the coffee immediately before is going to give you the best flavor but there’s also the matter of convenience – sometimes I buy the sliced bread.”

One thing that all of the experts agree on is that even though these rules will help improve any cup, you’ll have to do some experimenting to find the perfect cup of coffee for you. Things like acidity and taste vary by region, and different roasts are stronger or lighter, etc.

The perfect excuse for another cup!

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13 Things McDonald’s Employees Really Need You to Know About

McDonald’s employees serve hundreds, sometimes thousands of people a day, but most of those customers probably never think twice about the hard work that goes into that job. Seriously, you may look down on it, but there’s no doubt that slaving over vats of boiling oil and dealing with customers all day is not easy.

So today, we’re serving up a little something different: the “inner thoughts” of a McDonald’s worker.

1. I know it’s a tough decision…

Photo Credit: Buzzfeed

2. I understand you may be wrangling kids or filling your drink at the soda fountain, but listen up!

Photo Credit: Buzzfeed

3. The ice cream machine is actually broken

Photo Credit: Buzzfeed

4. Come again?

Photo Credit: Buzzfeed

5. BBQ sauce with a straw?

Photo Credit: Buzzfeed

6. This isn’t BK

Photo Credit: Buzzfeed

7. Just because they are paid to work there, doesn’t mean they are paid to clean up after your mess.

Photo Credit: Buzzfeed

8. They work crazy hours!

Photo Credit: Buzzfeed

9. The problem with chip readers

Photo Credit: Buzzfeed

10. Seriously, what do you want?

Photo Credit: Buzzfeed

11. It’s cheaper to order the hamburger

Photo Credit: Buzzfeed

12. How can they NOT know? Sheesh.

Photo Credit: Buzzfeed

13. Light bulb moment

Photo Credit: Buzzfeed

To all the McDonalds and fast food employees. Bless your heart in dealing with us.

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PETA Just Posted a Bizarre Image That Left the Internet Horrified

Between all the squabbling that’s tearing our nation apart these days, there’s still one surefire way to bring people across all aisles of the spectrum together: PETA crossing the damn line with their weirdness.

The organization’s name stands for “People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals,” which seems like a noble enough goal… until you see some of the outrageous stunts they pull (like suing a wildlife photographer on behalf of the monkey he photographed). They’re more of a radical anti-human group than they are a pro-animal rights group.

While they have occasionally done some good, they’ve wasted millions of dollars in truly bizarre, totally useless bids for publicity. The latest case in point?

This horror that I can’t unsee.

Yeah, it’s exactly what it looks like. A weird, anthropomorphized cow letting some creepy old man suckle from it.

The caption reads:

Looks weird right? It’s what you’re doing if you drink cow’s milk. Raiseyour hand if you know that humans shouldn’t be drinking cow’s breast milk. It was made for their babies—not you!

It didn’t take long before nearly all of Twitter united to make fun of it…

Photo Credit: Twitter

Some people definitely liked the image more than I did.

Photo Credit: Twitter

Photo Credit: Twitter

Photo Credit: Twitter

Others wondered if the images were part of some kind of secret furry agenda PETA has.

Photo Credit: Twitter

Photo Credit: Twitter

For those of you who don’t know, a “furry” is someone who’s “an enthusiast for animal characters with human characteristics, in particular a person who dresses up in costume as such a character or uses one as an avatar online.” Thanks, Dictionary.com!

While being a furry isn’t inherently sexual, it definitely can have that component to it (and is probably most famous for that reason).

Some people were even… stirred… pretty deeply by the image.

Photo Credit: Twitter

Photo Credit: Twitter

The longer you look at it, the more weirdness you start to notice.

Photo Credit: Twitter

Photo Credit: Twitter

Photo Credit: Twitter

Seriously PETA, WTF?

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Entire Internet is Disturbed by Revelation That St. Louis Slices Bagels Like Bread

St. Louis, MO is apparently a world unto itself… and not just because they’ve got the world-famous Arch.

Photo Credit: iStock

The reason we’re talking about the Gateway City today is because of what they do to these delicious circles of boiled and baked bread.

Photo Credit: iStock

Yes, we’re talking about the humble bagel – the chewy, Jewish-American breakfast staple traditionally served sliced in half, smeared with cream cheese and maybe with a bit of lox and capers?

YUM!

But this is apparently what happens to bagels in St. Louis:

Yes. Apparently in St. Louis they treat bagels like they’re loaves of bread. And the internet is NOT having it.

Because why people… why?!?

Does anybody like St. Louis anyway? (Don’t answer that St. Louisians. You don’t count.)

Although it’s probably too late for this idea…

“Bread slicing” bagels almost feels like a hate crime.

But maybe Christina has an answer. Because what is this St. Louis Bread Company and how can we stop them?

Even Panera weighed in and we’re even more confused! Why are you divided about this?

Quick fun fact many people outside of St. Louis don’t know. In St. Louis, Panera is actually called St. Louis Bread Company. And they have bread slicers in every location for just this reason.

Needless to say, employees suffer as a result.

The struggle is real.

Real fucking real.

Nothing is going to solve this predicament. St. Louis bagel eaters are still going to act like god damn monsters, “bread slicing” their bagels from now until eternity.

But none of us has to like it. Or ever go to St. Louis again.

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