Absolutely Brutal Text Conversations You Need To See

I’ve been having one of those months that is full of brutal conversations. But I count myself lucky that none of them have been at the level of brutality presented in the screenshots of convos from these people on Reddit. Because holy crap.

Laugh, cry, and wince along as we look through some taxing texts.

10. Feelings are feelings

Wow, what did they do to deserve this war crime of a response?

9. Missed me

Sure hope you won, Caroline.

8. Ever-vigilant

When you’re very involved in your son’s life but not enough to know how old he is.

7. Comfort

To be fair, how does one respond to that?

6. Rachel

Yeah this has gotta be against like a dozen company/privacy policies.

5. Get it?

Move on honey, he’s not worth it.

4. Group projects

Arjun is never gonna recover from this one.

3. Caved

I think we can safely say reconciliation is off the table.

2. I am the night

Stick with the normal cliches like “It’s not you, it’s me” next time.

1. Face the facts

You both need to move away and start new lives somewhere.

I feel like I’m playing Mortal Combat because that was some brutality turned fatality right there.

What’s the most brutal exchange you’ve had lately?

Tell us in the comments.

The post Absolutely Brutal Text Conversations You Need To See appeared first on UberFacts.

12 Times People DEMANDED Free Stuff

I’d like to say that I’m not one of these people who sits around yelling about how “KIDS THESE DAYS JUST WANT EVERYTHING FOR FREE!!”

I personally believe that we’re crippling entire generations with debt by refusing to provide basic needs in the name of increased profits for folks who have no business getting any richer.

That said, there is a line. Taxing billionaires to provide free college? Sure. Yes. All for it. Just demanding some internet stranger who probably has no more than you do that they give you their time/money/stuff for free because you feel like it? No bueno.

That kind of entitlement lands you on a list like this.

12. The mask you wear.

Begging and choosing.

11. Any reason.

Does this actually work?

10. Wish list.

The airpods he’s referring to go for $50 used.

9. Drawing conclusions.

Why do people think artists should be paid?

8. Keep the faith.

There’s nothing wrong with being religious, there’s a lot wrong with waving your religion around like an all-access pass assuming it should garner you a bunch of privileges.

7. Just pretty and nice.

The absolute nerve to post this as a comment.

6. Get a grip.

Yanno, there are brand deals to be struck between companies. It happens all the time.
This is not how it happens.

5. Very driven.

This is either sort of heartbreakingly sincere or a way-too-obvious-scam to get a free RV from the faithful.

4. Still charging?

Ah yes, it’s criminal that Big Independant Artist is out here price gouging for essentials like *checks notes* dog portraits.

3. A bad influence.

Wait, who’s on a horse now?

2. Yes, no thanks.

“Free product and pay for delivery? Nah. I’ll pay for the product AND delivery. That’s a better deal.”

1. The machine.

I can’t throw too much shade at this one because, honestly, I get it.

Keep goin’ out there and demanding what you must from the man. But don’t rip each other off. That’s not how we do.

Do you have a terrible selling experience?

Tell us about it in the comments.

The post 12 Times People DEMANDED Free Stuff appeared first on UberFacts.

Funny Tweets From People on the Struggle Bus

A philosopher once said, “Seek not perfection, seek only to live, for in living there – aw, dammit! I just spilled coffee all over my smock. My NEW smock. Dad was right, I’ll never make it as a philosopher. Stupid Carl. STUPID.” And you know what? He was right.

Here are tweets from ten people who are trying and failing and trying again.

10. Skin deep

Honestly even the fact that you’re talking about cleaning your room seems a little braggy to me.

9. High standards

When you realize that you may not be the catch you imagine yourself to be.

8. Don’t mind me

When you’re so in the moment you can’t smell your kitchen on fire.

7. Minimalism

I’m less concerned about the folding chair and more concerned about the two dozen paddles on the back wall.

6. Special delivery

I’ll bet he just ate all your fries and didn’t want to admit it.

5. This is just grate

How…how did you manage to get home like that?

4. The juice is loose

Gonna clean those things down to a pulp.

3. The pie goes on forever

Hey last time I checked you were my bank, not my mom.

2. Recipe for disaster

Honestly I thought the food might just be more impressive.

1. Shoe-less and clueless

At least you’re not stomping around trying to pretend your rights are being violated.

None of us has it fully together. And that’s ok. Just make sure to share your failures with others, because they’re usually really, really funny.

What’s been your biggest fail moment lately?

Tell us about it in the comments.

The post Funny Tweets From People on the Struggle Bus appeared first on UberFacts.

Men Share Their Worst First Date Stories…and It Was All Their Fault

I’m not sure whether humans engage in dating in order to find partners or just so they have wild stories to tell, like this one on Reddit:

Whats the worst thing you have done/said on a first date? from AskReddit

Of course, he’s not alone.

Many, MANY other dudes chimed in with their own tales of woe:

1. Welcome to the slammer.

First real date ever: I am extremely nervous, dry mouth, sweaty palms, the whole 9 yards.

I washed and cleaned my car. I took a shower with fancy soaps, trimmed my nest of pubes, powdered my b*lls and shaved my face. I was ready!

I drove up to her house, shook hands with her mother, met the family, made jokes and broke the ice. I was still nervous, but it was subsiding, and I was on my way to victory.

I remembered to open the car door for her and proceeded to slam the door on her leg as she was getting situated.

Date over. ?

– usedbooks

2. Gettin’ smoked.

My neighbor used to be my pot dealer so he’d constantly front me stuff when either he didn’t have change or i didn’t feel like walking to an A.T.M. etc.

We hung out all the time, this was never a problem, i always paid and i’d thrown him a bunch of clients so sometimes he just didn’t care about a g. I also didn’t smoke enough for this to be a problematic arrangement.

One day he moves out, only a few blocks away, but I owed him 40 dollars.

We’re both really busy, he’s a musician i’m a photographer, so i’d try to get ahold of him to get him the money and it would never match up, and when we’d hang out we’d usually forget. Again, we’re friends, not an issue.

So i’m on a first date about a block from my house at a bar and i see him sitting with his girlfriend a few booths away, i text him saying i’m watching him and i have his money if he wants it/to come join our table. no response.

thirty minutes later we’re outside having a cigarette and he comes outside, grabs me by the throat and demands his money because “no one f*cks with him and his drugs”. immediately i knew he was kidding…my date didn’t. she freaked out and maced both of us.

we’re all still friends and i still got laid.

– [user deleted]

3. Ya boring.

Taken her as a newcomer to a screening of The Rocky Horror Picture Show, with a live shadow cast and virgin tribulation and everything.

First and only date; I worried about it for a long time, but then realized, f*ck it, she’s boring.

– TheAustinKnight

4. Do the math.

“I failed grade nine applied math twice. But I’m not really a thinker, I’m a doer. Sometimes I actually need a calculator to count to ten.”

After this I was like ‘Omg time to go water my cat’ and drove her home, skipping every stop sign on the way.

Twenty five minute date, my fastest yet!

– JupiterDeusMaximus

5. Hit and run.

Took a girl out to dinner

During dinner, I notice a scar on her arm

I ask about it

“I got hit by a car while I was crossing the street a few years ago”

Go for a walk after dinner to get some coffee across the street

By now, completely forgot about the got-hit-by-a-car story

Crosswalk light is about to turn red

I say “We can make it” and we start rushing across the street

We almost get hit by a car.

Yeah, no second date.

– Piratiko

6. Punch drunk love.

ended up in bed with her, when we turned off the lights and i lifted my t-shirt i accidentally punched her on her nose-piercing with my elbow.

that was not the night i got laid

– mousestar

7. Sweet dreams!

I took a girl to see requiem for a dream.

Yeah that was uncomfortable.

– stringrbelloftheball

8. Cool it.

Not me, but my best friend. He was on a date with some dumb girl once and they were having a good time, sitting in his room listening to music and talking.

She picked up a heating pad and said, “This would be so nice on me right now,” and he jokingly said, “Yeah. I wonder if it will work on my cold, lonely heart.” She promptly left.

I thought it was funny.

– ilestledisko

9. Yikes.

I am 25 and went on a date with an 18 year old.

Over the course of coffee she told me her entire sexual history, including abortions and the baby she gave up for adoption.

Her friend happened to walk by and they chatted for a moment.

She (the friend) was worried she might be pregnant and my date suggested she keep the baby just to anger the man’s wife.

We did not have a second date.

– WallyIsHiding

10. Curb your enthusiasm.

Left a girl at the curb because she refused to open the car door for herself, and resorted to insults to express her indignation that I had not automatically done so for her.

This was at her house so its not like I abandoned her, but she did have to walk back and explain to her parents why she was back early after I had just met them.

– ItGotRidiculous

11. Nerding out.

I went to pick her up and her brother answered the door.

He was holding a DS playing Pokemon. As I waited for her to come down, I proceeded to talk to him about it in depth.

She heard everything…

– RingAnswerHello

12. Warming up.

The conversation was getting a bit sexy, things were definitely warming up. Our hands were exploring some.

She asked me about past conquests, girls I’d been with, things we’d done, etc.

So since she prompted me, I told her this story about this girl I’d had sex with a few times, just as a hook-up, no dating.

Turns out, even though I didn’t mention names, there were enough details for her to figure it out, because she knew the girl…her cousin.

Also, as it happens, the cousin not only thought that were dating, but had thought we were dating exclusively until I dumped her for no reason.

That realization and the conversation that came from it was a bit awkward…

– ronearc

13. Take a bow.

Not me but my friend, took a girl to see the play I was in on a first date so I got to witness it.

While getting ready to leave, he puts on his coat and BAM punches her straight in the nose. Broke it nicely.

I have never had to stop from laughing so much while taking a bow.

– AdmanUK

14. Just a poke.

I was fresh out of a horrific mentally abusive relationship when I started to date again, so needless to say, I was a bit of a SAP around girls this time around.

I was on a date with this girl, we were hanging out at my house, watching a movie, having dinner, very casual.

At the end of the night, I walk her outside and to her car in the driveway and we’re just standing there. She says she had a good time and she’ll come to have a drink with me on the weekend blah blah blah, that old song and dance. She was getting ready to hug me goodbye, and my mind went BLANK and I just kind of poked her. Yes, poked her, with my finger… on her side, like “heh, thanks for coming over…” Her face was priceless. Then she said, “Ok… welp, see ya.”

Dumbest thing I’ve ever done.

– Bad_assness

15. It’s a sign!

I’m really not a fan of astrology, but I don’t really care if someone likes it.

Anyway, this girl said she was good at guessing signs.

I must admit, i was impressed when she got it right in only 10 guesses.

– Fearlessleader85

I can feel that last one pretty hard. You can watch my smile die in real time as anyone anywhere tells me about “my sign.” *shudders*

What’s the worst date you’ve ever been on?

Tell us in the comments.

The post Men Share Their Worst First Date Stories…and It Was All Their Fault appeared first on UberFacts.

Enjoy Some of the Best Comebacks Found on the Internet

The thing about the internet is that it’s a huge public forum where almost anybody can access and respond to the things you say.

And the thing about having a forum like that is that with so many eyeballs on your statement, odds are exceedingly good that at least one pair of those eyes is gonna be connected to a brain that just happens to have the most perfectly devastating response.

Ergo, the internet is basically just one giant clap back machine, and the results are hilarious and oof-worthy.

Here are fifteen examples of killer comebacks brought to us by the internet.

15. First languages

Clearly she meant speak American. Yanno, talk about guns and Tiger King.

14. Safety second

And just like Jurassic Park, we literally never learn.

13. Special delivery

(Club = team for all my fellow basic Americans.)

12. Social predictions

Don’t hold back, king.

11. Deep breaths

I might be suffocating but these download speeds are tight.

10. Packing heat

It was planted on me, I swear.

9. Cold shoulder

Every doctor: “This is way worse than a cold or the flu.”
Your cousin: “Nu uh.”

8. Well actually

If he was around to hear this conversation he’d cut off his ear all over again.

https://ryanrosslegs.tumblr.com/post/111237376092/shaxaphone-growlithed

7. Desperate measures

Get bent, bruh.

Ooof and well asked for. from clevercomebacks

6. Just kidding

Nothing better than when you can turn around a yo mama joke.

Dominance asserted from clevercomebacks

5. Born and raised

“If we went back to using obsolete techniques and technologies, people would be confused.” – a boomer’s idea of a sick burn.

Weird motives from clevercomebacks

4. Don’t cry for me

If being a man means I don’t get to care about my own parents then screw it, I’m a wombat.

In a post about “man up” being an insult. from clevercomebacks

3. Granting wishes

That kid is going to be a lawyer when she grows up.

Children are savages from MurderedByWords

2. Can’t take the heat

But…but…I saw a meme somewhere that said…

A Moron and a Microbiologist Comment on a COVID-19 Article… from clevercomebacks

1. The winter of our inconvenience

We’re so insular we literally forget there are other countries.

On a thread about wearing masks from clevercomebacks

That’s a lot of cathartic comebacks right there. Sort of revs you up to go plant a few yourself. Remember: don’t go looking for a fight. But when the time comes to strike, use the opportunity well.

What’s your favorite comeback lately?

Tell us in the comments.

The post Enjoy Some of the Best Comebacks Found on the Internet appeared first on UberFacts.

All of These Employees Have One Thing in Common: Failure

YOU HAD ONE FREAKIN’ JOB!!

And…it looks like you blew it. Yes, I’m speaking to the people who are responsible for the work fails that you’re about to see, but I’m also looking at YOU, buddy.

We might not know each other personally, but I have a feeling that you’ve messed up royally at your job lately and you need to be scolded…

So, just keep that in mind…and know that I’ll be watching…

And, with that, it’s time to enjoy epic work fails by other people!

1. I’m pretty sure that spells out P-O-O-P.

Oh, boy, this is not good.

Not sure if intentional or oblivious, but this architect did a crappy job. from onejob

2. That was a nice surprise.

But the pizza joint is missing a cutter…

I guess they decided to include the cutter as a premium topping from onejob

3. You deserve a break!

Nice work on this one!

Finished labeling the package, boss. from onejob

4. Elmo has now been possessed.

What do you have to say about this?

Elmo born with eyes on the back of his head from onejob

5. Hmmmm. Can’t seem to get past this screen.

Does anyone have suggestions?

Teachers making quizzes from onejob

6. I’d probably skip this place if I were you.

They’re eating people!

Food may contain human flesh from onejob

7. Do you think anyone fell for it?

I’m guessing NO.

You were close here. from onejob

8. I have to think about that one…

You know what, I’m really not sure…

I honestly want to know how someone manged this from onejob

9. Just go ahead and use it whenever.

It has no expiration date!

Legend has it that it’s still good to this day from onejob

10. Free coffee for sale!

What a deal!

Task failed successfully from onejob

11. Don’t try this at home.

Also, this is false advertising.

That’s definitely not "Bath" Sponge. from onejob

12. This was from a “professional” bakery.

Now, how does that work…?

hAppY BiRthDay COlleEN (from a professional bakery) from onejob

Okay, it’s confession time…

What’s the biggest fail you’ve ever been guilty of at work?

Talk to us in the comments and SPILL YOUR GUTS. Thanks in advance!

The post All of These Employees Have One Thing in Common: Failure appeared first on UberFacts.

If You Think You’re Bad at Your Job, These Fails Might Make You Feel Better

If nothing else, we think that these disastrous job fails you’re about to lay your eyes on will at least make you feel better about your own job and your own life.

And that’s something, isn’t it?!?! I sure think so!

Hey, if it takes the misery of other people to make yourself better, then I say just embrace it.

Are you ready for a pick-me-up. Let’s take a look at these job fails.

1. I’m sorry to hear that.

But just go ahead and use your finger, okay?

One space was all it was needed from onejob

2. Don’t get into any trouble in this area.

Just trust us on this one…

I feel so safe from onejob

3. Elmo has been possessed by the Devil.

Oh my God, he’s levitating off the bed!

Elmo born with eyes on the back of his head from onejob

4. No expiration date. EVER.

Oh, that’s good to know.

Legend has it that it’s still good to this day from onejob

5. You had one job!

That sure didn’t go very well.

Trick or Trick from onejob

6. How did they get THAT wrong?

Some people, I swear…

I know this year has sucked, but c’mon… from onejob

7. You did a bang-up job!

I think you deserve a promotion.

Installed the sink boss! from onejob

8. Anyone care to explain this?

Yikes…not a good look.

Nope, no problem here from onejob

9. What are you complaining about?

But you’re right, someone did not perform their job correctly.

My KitKat was just a bar of chocolate from onejob

10. That’s not very helpful.

Can someone point that down here, please?

Light up the stars, baby! from onejob

11. A good use of cardboard, paper, etc.

Come on, people!

I ordered a precision screwdriver and it got delivered like this from onejob

12. That is NOT a can of corn.

Not even close…

Opened a can of corn and… from onejob

Well, those made me feel a little bit better about my work performance.

How about you? Have you ever really biffed it at your job?

If so, tell us all about it in the comments. We’d love to hear from you!

The post If You Think You’re Bad at Your Job, These Fails Might Make You Feel Better appeared first on UberFacts.

You Had One Job! Check Out These Sad, Sad Work Fails.

It’s pretty amazing how many people are bad at their jobs and they still manage to float through life…and to never get fired. They blow it time and time again and there just never seems to be any consequences.

You know what I’m talking about, right?

Of course, you do!

Because these kinds of folks are EVERYWHERE.

Yes, I know we all make mistakes at our jobs, but sometimes people just really blow my mind with their laziness…it’s enough to get me all fired up!

Are you ready to see some infuriating job fails? Let’s take a look.

1. That was not even close!

You spent a few weeks on this, didn’t you?

No wonder I was struggling… from onejob

2. Get into the holiday spirit!

Wait a second…those look like…

Got the Christmas lights up. They’re… candles. Yeah. Really. from onejob

3. Now what am I supposed to do?

Well…that’s a little unusual.

I am so confused from onejob

4. They do now!

Just go with it!

Apparently, mermaids have butts. from NotMyJob

5. But what will it do to my hands?

Sounds like it could be dangerous.

Posted the sign, boss … from onejob

6. I’m totally confused.

Who’s responsible for this?

Visible confusion from onejob

7. This is gonna take a little while to fix.

Somebody is in big trouble!

it was almost fine from onejob

8. I enjoy biking very much.

This is just plain LAZY.

Finished labeling the package, boss. from onejob

9. Don’t go near that thing.

You might be in for a big shock.

Safety first from onejob

10. Those darn Socialists are at it again…

I’m a little bit worked up about this.

to fend off covid from onejob

11. Yeah, that is not correct.

I wonder how avocado ice cream would taste, though…

I’m pretty sure that’s an avocado! from onejob

Those poor people…

But enough about them. Now it’s your turn!

In the comments, share your own stories of work fails with us. We can’t wait to hear from you!

The post You Had One Job! Check Out These Sad, Sad Work Fails. appeared first on UberFacts.

Epic Work Fails That Are Bad Enough to Make a Grown Man Cry

I have to say, the older I get, the more it angers me when I see people being lazy on the job.

I mean, I understand that we all have bad days here and there, but come on, people! Put some effort in and be proud of your work, no matter what you do!

Some of the job fails you’re about to see might make you angry, annoyed, and they’ll definitely make you laugh.

Are you ready to have some LOLs at the expense of other people who probably got in trouble at work for their mistakes? Me, too! Let’s do it!

1. Are you sure that’s Big Ben?

It looks like something I’ve seen from another country…

Big Ben Looks Funny from onejob

2. Hahahaha. Amazing.

Well, I guess they took your directions literally.

“Write congrats on them” ( two cakes ) from onejob

3. Who’s ready to eat?!?!

It sounds good to me…

MMM! Lung damage! from onejob

4. I guess it happens from time to time.

Don’t even worry about it!

Don’t apologize, it happens? from onejob

5. Well…I can’t see the speed limit…

So, what am I supposed to do…?

Not sure if that’s how this works from onejob

6. Not getting the message across to people…

Nice try, though.

My churches anti racism slogan from onejob

7. Wow, that is kinda sad.

Who’s responsible for this?

Restored the sculpture boss from onejob

8. This is a total disaster.

Turn around and walk away…

Hit yourself you will from onejob

9. How did it taste, though?

Thank you, sir, may I have another?!?!

I found a use by date sticker in my burger… from onejob

10. The stuff nightmares are made of.

This poor kid is gonna get heckled.

Left: how it should be Right: how they did it from onejob

11. Would you want to work here?

You might never leave…just a warning…

Food may contain human flesh from onejob

How about you?

Have you ever had a monumental fail at work?

Share your horror stories with us in the comments. We can’t wait!

The post Epic Work Fails That Are Bad Enough to Make a Grown Man Cry appeared first on UberFacts.

Epic Job Fails That Will Make You Shake Your Head

Here we go again

It’s time for another painful installment of people who really biffed it at work and probably paid the ultimate price for it.

No, I don’t mean they got hurt, or anything like that! I mean that they probably got fired…because these fails are NG. And where I come from that means NO GOOD.

Take a look at these job fails and say a little prayer for these folks and hope that they’re still employed.

Let’s dive in!

1. YOU WILL MARRY ME.

Well, I guess this person doesn’t have a choice.

How hard is it? from onejob

2. This isn’t going to end well.

I’d stay far away from this truck if I were you…

Don’t worry boss, I wrote from onejob

3. PLEASE DO NOT BEND.

Well, that wasn’t cool…

Who’s idea was it to put an elastic band around this… from onejob

4. You sure about that?

I’m not taking your word on this one, sorry…

Chicken nuggets from onejob

5. Sending some mixed messages.

The idea is not clear here.

adorpion from beatMeatToIt

6. I don’t think anyone’s gonna buy that.

Would you?

The sticker got a little too sticky from onejob

7. The guy got a little drunk.

And this is what happened…

How in the name of all thats holy did you manage to do that from onejob

8. Be careful with this one!

You might hurt yourself.

That’s definitely not "Bath" Sponge. from onejob

9. WEELCOME to our home!

This is not a good omen…

There was an attempt to write Welcome in the floor using stone inlay. from onejob

10. Had a few too many Appletinis.

You can hardly even notice!

He was “just a little” drunk when painting from onejob

11. Can anyone explain this to me?

I’m totally LOST.

I made the sign boss. from onejob

12. No wheels of any kind, I guess?

Or something like that…

Ah yes, skateboard from onejob

Okay, friends, now we want to hear from you.

Have you ever witnessed someone really blow it at work? Or maybe you’re the one who did it?

Please share your stories with us in the comments. Thanks!

The post Epic Job Fails That Will Make You Shake Your Head appeared first on UberFacts.