People Share How They’d Ruin a First Date Immediately

I’m not sure who would purposely ruin a first date, but there are a ton of weirdos out there, so anything goes these days, it seems.

The question posed on AskReddit was: “You got ten seconds to ruin a first date. How?”

And AskReddit users let us into their twisted little worlds…enjoy!

1. Let’s speed this up.

“Tell them to make this quick you have another one in an hour.”

2. That was Johnny.

“Answer a fake phone call with “Hey babe. Yeah I’m at the bar with Johnny. See you later. Love you!’”

3. Mommy says so.

“Mom says I have to go on at least one date a month or else she’ll cut me off.

So let’s get this over with.”

4. Put a scare into them.

“Oh, I’m so glad you agreed to meet. My kids need a new Daddy.

Since I’ve been cleared of that *air quotes* accident my late husband had, it’s time to get back out there.

*takes phone call, whispering* No, no, he’s here. Yeah. No, he’s not a drinker so the liver should be fine.”

5. Some light conversation.

“What’s your stance on abortion?

Because you should know my stance on condoms.”

6. That should do it.

“Her: “Hi! Thank you for coming to pick me up!”

Me: “I don’t think I could have waited another second.” and then rip the juiciest, rankest fart possible just after she’s gotten in the car and make sure to lock the windows so she can’t get fresh air. Follow with “You’re WELCOME.” “

7. Dig for gold.

“Don’t say a word, lock eyes, and just go knuckle deep in my nose and dig around for a good long while.”

8. You might get punched.

“I have another girl waiting so if we’re not gonna fuck after this I need to go.”

9. Forgot about that.

“Whoops left this on.

Slip off wedding band.”

10. This will get you in trouble.

“Laugh very loudly and obnoxiously and then exclaim, “I haven’t laughed this hard since 9/11″

Works every time.”

11. This is a great opportunity.

“Admit you aren’t attracted to them and only invited them out to hear about your great MLM business opportunity.”

12. How rude!

“I much rather be doing something else right now, but I guess this will do.”

13. Too much, too soon.

“I think I’m falling in love with you.”

14. If they agree, it all works out.

“I’d say “So now that I’m here we can discuss prices.

For me being at this dinner it’s $250. If you want to have sex later it will be an extra $500.”

15. Creeper vibes.

“Aww. Look at this puppy!

It’s so sexy, makes me really horny.”

16. Oh, Mother! She always knows best!

“Just reply with laughing for 5 seconds minimum followed by “Mother always says that!””

17. Put them to sleep.

“Explain the intricate details as to why RBMK Reactor number 4 failed causing Europe’s biggest nuclear accident.”

18. First things first.

“Ask to see their feet before even greeting them.”

19. I think that would probably work.

“Scratch my scalp furiously and say, “Ugh, I hate having fleas!””

20. Meet the family!

“We can’t order until my wife and kids get here to see if they like you.”

21. He’ll be gone in no time.

“I’m gonna walk in, in a wedding dress with a priest, ask him to marry me.”

Those all sound pretty good to me! Cheers to ruining a first date!

What do you think? Have you ever sabotaged a date on purpose? Or maybe you blew it on accident and regretted it?

Share your dating disaster stories with us in the comments!

The post People Share How They’d Ruin a First Date Immediately appeared first on UberFacts.

Painful and Pretty Funny Tweets About Getting Ghosted

Ghosting seems to be a recent phenomenon in the dating world…or maybe we just came up with a word for something that’s always been around.

Whatever the case, getting ghosted is a major bummer and most of us have had it happen at least once in our lives.

Here are some funny and very accurate tweets about getting ghosted…good luck out there.

1. You should make it happen!

2. Honey…you’ve been ghosted.

3. Sounds kinda classy.

4. They need to get on this.

5. Sad, but true.

6. We’re in love.

7. It was fun while it lasted.

8. That’s a lot!

9. Not again…

10. A preemptive strike.

11. One way of looking at it.

12. It’s all the same.

13. I would be down with this.

14. Gone in an instant.

15. Doesn’t work that way…

Ouch…those sting a little bit, huh? Isn’t dating a blast?!?! Yeah…maybe not so much…

Have you been ghosted before? Or maybe you were the person who actually did the ghosting?

Either way, tell us what happened in the comments!

The post Painful and Pretty Funny Tweets About Getting Ghosted appeared first on UberFacts.

15 Reasons Why No One Likes Dating Apps

I know there are a whoel lot of good things that have come along with the invention of the Internet, but you won’t convince me that dating apps are one of them.

It’s too impersonal, it’s too much like a game, and it makes it way to easy to judge other people by a brief appearance.

Here are 15 other reasons that dating apps are just absolutely the worst.

15. They can kill your self-confidence.

14. A picture is worth a thousand words.

13. They have become a necessary evil.

12. Being weird isn’t a bad thing.

11. You have to just jump on in.

10. I mean any way you slice it, you have to meet people in public.

9. Too many options can be a bad problem to have.

8. That can cause a lot of anxiety.

7. It’s probably from never having to do it in person.

6. That’s probably one of the healthier ways to go about it.

5. People don’t even try to really get to know you.

4. To be fair, all of those things are awesome.

3. At least you know there are people out there in your boat.

2. The cream always rises…eventually.

1. The first one is my (least) favorite.

I’m so glad I’m not out there anymore, and that if I were to find myself single, I would just throw in the towel.

Have you spent time on dating apps? What was your worst and best experience?

We want to hear about it in the comments!

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Women Share the Weirdest and Craziest Texts That Men Have Ever Sent Them

Guys…you all need to chill out a little bit.

You’re being way too overbearing, and you’re coming off like total psychopaths.

Well, maybe not all men, but these guys for sure…

Study these text exchanges carefully and whatever you do, don’t make these same mistakes.

1. Let us begin.

2. Take that back!

3. Okay, this is weird.

4. Seems fair.

5. “Accidentally”, huh?

6. Still managed to message you.

7. Merry Christmas!

8. BRB in a few months.

9. What a guy.

10. If you change your mind…

11. I put a spell on you.

12. Creeper to the extreme.


Wow…guys…let’s take it down a notch, okay?

Ladies, has this happened to you at all in your personal life?

If so, let us know how it all went down in the comments!

The post Women Share the Weirdest and Craziest Texts That Men Have Ever Sent Them appeared first on UberFacts.

People Confess Their Reasons for Not Ditching Bad Relationships

People are very complex, and so are the reasons they fall in love…and the reasons they fall apart. As we age, most of us learn the hard way that trying to maintain a relationship with someone who doesn’t put your feelings, needs, or safety first isn’t worth the time.

But we learn those lessons because once upon a time we, too, waited way too long to leave.

These 10 people are ready to confess the reasons they stay in relationships they know in their heart aren’t good at all.

10. Believe me, he knows exactly what he’s doing.

9. I wonder if they feel bad for themselves or the other party.

8. Then take some time alone to fix yourself.

7. I suspect that’s exactly the way she wants it.

6. That all sounds supremely unhealthy.

5. What about your own heart, though?

4. I’m sorry to say that probably won’t work forever.

3. Practice makes perfect.

2. Those are just scraps.

1. You have to get out.

I hope all of these people find their 10 seconds of courage – and the door – sooner rather than later!

Have you been scared to leave a relationship? What made you finally do it – or have you?

Share with us in the comments if you’re comfortable!

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People Discuss What Makes Them Immediately Lose Romantic Interest in Someone

You’ve probably been here before: you’re talking to someone or maybe you’re on a first date, things seem to be going just fine and then, BOOM…they say or do something that immediately makes you lose interest.

You know what I’m talking about, right?

AskReddit users shared the things that make them immediately lose interest in a person…let’s take a look.

1. So, back to me…

“When you come to them with a problem and they turn it into a conversation about them.”

2. Pity party.

“If they constantly make you feel bad for them. Felt so bad and was so worried about him for so long that the one time I needed the emotion I couldn’t have it.”

3. Take it down a notch.

“When they don’t know the difference between being funny and being obnoxious.”

4. I’ll take your word for it.

“If they say the words “I know I’m an asshole/bitch”. Like okay I’ll take your word for it. Also if it becomes apparent that they have no self-awareness.”

5. Forget the haters.

“They enjoy putting other people and their hobbies down.”

6. I’m back!

“Ghosting you then suddenly popping up out of the blue when they want attention. Yes Brittany I know what is happening when you call me, you’re scraping the bottom of the barrel and I resent the fuck out of being the bottom (wait that could mean another thing but you know the thing I mean.)”

7. Lack of situational awareness.

“Don’t know how to act in public/ are unaware of feelings other than their own.”

8. Who is the real problem here?

“If ALL of their exes were “toxic” or “crazy”

We all have one or two bad ones, but seriously it’s not ALWAYS that.”

9. That’s gross.

“Doing dumb things and should know better. We had a new guy join our Friday social group. Very nice guy. Attractive. At the bar, he took his old gum out of his mouth and stuck it to the bottom of the table. Really? So trashy.”

10. Definitely not cool.

“Selfishness. I am very considerate of others and I am slowly learning that I think I need someone that is too.”

11. Gimme something!

“When they have seemingly no opinion, no voice. When every answer is “I don’t care” or “I don’t know.” Like Jesus Christ I’m trying to find out what you like so that we can talk. Gimme something!”

12. Sounds pretty classy.

“Chewing tobacco. I’m also not a fan of smoking, but it’s not necessarily an instant deal breaker like chewing tobacco is. The truth is, I have seen too many men who would sit there and chew tobacco and then spit it into an empty Dr. Pepper bottle, and it grosses me out more than I can express.”

13. Let’s not meet again.

“Went out with a guy once who talked 90% of the time, 85% of that being about how much money he had made, how much he spent on his now ex wife, all the nice cars he had… I picked HIM up because he didn’t have a ride to meet up. He was legitimately confused why I didn’t want to spend the night with him when I went to drop his ass off. Never saw him ever again.”

14. This! Yes!

“Being rude to customer service people.”

15. Ugh! Run for the hills!

“If they say I love you on the first date. Creepy AF.”

I had a feeling these responses would be pretty enlightening.

Now it’s your turn! What immediately turns you off from a person?

Tell us about it in the comments!

The post People Discuss What Makes Them Immediately Lose Romantic Interest in Someone appeared first on UberFacts.

These Tweets Show Prove That the Dating World Sure Is Rough

Dating can really be a drag. Especially these days with all the dating apps and the pressure to find the right person.

And once you do commit to a date, you never know who you’ll be dealing with for the evening. There are a lot of weirdos out there…

Let’s hear some dating stories that might make you get rid of your Tinder app once and for all.

1. That wasn’t nice.

2. Was he impressed?

3. That’s a power move in my book.

4. They sound like a solid group of fellas.

5. Joke’s on you.

6. Trying to seal the deal.

7. Date = Over.

8. I don’t know…

9. He was a gem.

10. Thanks for letting me know.

11. Just trying to relate.

12. Not even mad.

13. How do you even get that pronunciation?

14. Are you still an idiot?

15. Okay, that’s really bad.

Ugh, those tweets definitely brought back some painful memories for me…

How about you? Have you had a hard time in the dating world?

Open up to us in the comments. We’re here for you!

The post These Tweets Show Prove That the Dating World Sure Is Rough appeared first on UberFacts.

People Share Their Awkward Meet-the-Parents Moments

Meeting your significant other’s parents is always a bit awkward. You want to make a good impression, but not come off to eager. Most of the time (hopefully), things go smoothly and mom and dad give you the nod of approval.

Sometimes, though, things take a turn for the worse, as these AskReddit users shared with the world.

1. Oh hello!

My mom and current wife met for the first time at 2am in my parents’ living room both wearing no bottoms…

2. Racist?

My whole family met my current boyfriend over Easter dinner. My father doesn’t typically say a word to new people my siblings and I bring home. Randomly during dinner my dad turned to my boyfriend and said, “you a racist?”

3. AWKWARD

Ugh, I was the girlfriend in question. I had come over to my long distance relationship boyfriend’s apartment on the way out of town. I had dressed in a plaid skirt, fishnets, combat boots, and a low cut black tank because I wanted to leave him with a good memory. So he’s got me pinned face first against the wall with my skirt flipped up and when his dad walks in. Apparently he’d come by early to take him to lunch and drop him at his job. I was absolutely mortified during the entire lunch with his dad, dad’s girlfriend, and my boyfriend.

4. Dinner time!

When I brought my first girlfriend home I was too embarrassed to say anything to my parents, so we went directly to my room and started fooling around. Here’s what transpired: My mom opens the door to my bedroom and stopped mid sentence “Hey I was thinking we could have turkey for -” I awkwardly remove my hand from the front of my girlfriends unbuttoned jeans “Oh uhm sorry I didn’t realize you had company” “Yeah this is Caitlin” “Hi Caitlin. Did you want to join us for supper?” “suuuuuuuuuurrree” Then we all had a super awkward dinner together. Fun times.

5. Good first impression

He recounted the story of when he drove home so drunk he lost a tire hitting something, then drove on the rim for at least 4 miles down the interstate. Thankfully he’s sober now, but is that something you want to talk about the first time you meet me?

6. Gloves are off

I never thought I would strike a teenager until I saw a boy smack my daughter’s butt in front of me with impunity.

7. This guy seems legit

I was over at my boyfriend’s family’s house for Easter where we all got together for an Easter egg hunt, dinner, and party games. My boyfriend’s middle sister had recently started seeing a guy she met on eHarmony, who apparently lived in Toronto. She spent the afternoon telling us about him, that he owned a delivery business and a flower shop. My boyfriend’s brother joked that he was a drug dealer for his ‘delivery business’, and we laughed as she tried to defend him.

So he finally drives up in a very expensive car, wearing a t-shirt with arrows pointing to the shoulders and the caption “Place legs here” written across the chest. Everyone started interrogating him, but he was avoidant of everything. I worked in a flower shop for seven years, and he couldn’t name any flowers. Granted his English wasn’t perfect and he was very awkward, but the drug dealer possibility became more likely as time went on.

Afterwards he went full-blown creepy stalker. She broke up with him, since he couldn’t explain anything, and he sent her 40+ text messages trying to get her back. Wrote ‘poems’ about how much it hurt to miss her and said he’d drop by her work. She blocked his number, reported him on eHarmony, and everyone in the family has sworn a pact to immediately call police if we see him anywhere. It was like standing next to a train wreck as it happened.

8. Scum

My boyfriend in high school was a senior at a different school, I was a sophomore. At their school homecoming game it was a tradition for all seniors to dress up in camouflage. So my mom first met him when he was dressed head-to-toe in black and white camouflage and wasn’t aware of the tradition. As he was walking toward us she said, “oh god, no.” And didn’t realize I’d heard her. To be fair, he was pure scum.

9. Drinkopoly!

The first weekend I went to stay with my boyfriend’s parents (I had never met them before) my boyfriend and I played Drinkopoly with some of his friends (like Monopoly, but you drink instead of using money). All was grand, I went to bed a little earlier than everyone else, and bf’s friends left saying “she drinks pretty well for a girl!” He comes up to bed, I proceed to throw up everywhere. On him, on his sheets, on myself.

He then put me in the shower and I apparently screamed random numbers at him and got angry when he didn’t understand. His parents were ridiculously cool about the whole thing; the next day as my boyfriend slept off the trauma I washed puke off his sheets then went with his mum to play with the cats they were soon to adopt. Oh, and then the next day his younger sister walked in on us having sex. Still don’t understand how his family likes me…

10. The Panda Misfits

When I brought my first serious boyfriend home to meet my mom he was wearing a Misfits sweatshirt. My mom, bless her, ignored his dyed mohawk, gaged ears and pierced nose and said that she liked his panda sweatshirt. I laughed so hard I cried. Got to give him credit though, he stuck around for 4 years.

11. Whoa

When my mother was 14, she wanted to date this boy who was 17. But my grandparents wouldn’t let her, because they “just don’t trust him”. My mom argues with her parents, but they stand firm on their decision. Flash forward about 8 years, my mom is happily married. Her parents show her the newspaper, and that boy (grown up now) made the paper: drug-deal gone wrong, armed robbery, double homicide and suicide.

12. Sleazy Teens

My most awkward meeting (I had met her mom briefly once before) of a girlfriend’s parent(s) was 9 years ago when I was 18. I was sitting on her mom’s couch chatting with my girlfriend while we texted each other dirty things. We would pretend to talk about being seniors, looking forward to graduating, etc, but we were really discussing the dirty and raunchy kind of teenage sex that abstinence only education warned you about.

As we texted more I started to get a little excited, nothing I couldn’t control but it felt dangerous and naughty which got the adrenaline flowing. Her mom was in the kitchen the entire time cooking up a meal leaving us to our secret naughty conversation. I told my then girlfriend to put her phone between her legs while it was on vibrate, she did and I called her repeatedly. Watching her get hornier got me hornier, the blood must flow!

Let’s pause for a second and examine this situation, I’m sitting on the couch hard as a rock, she’s sitting next to me with a phone between her legs while I call it repeatedly. What 18 year old guy wouldn’t be aroused? I misjudged one thing, how quickly her mom could prepare an entire meal. Panic time. Her mom walked in the living room to tell us dinner was done, but it had to cool down a bit. She wanted to take this time to get to know me. I had met her once before but only briefly, I’d only said hi to her at this point. She had perched on the arm of the love seat which was at a 90 degree angle to the couch we were sitting on, she sat there like a judging vulture disguised as Bettie Homemaker. Her voice and smile were gentle, but her eyes were fiery and alive like she plucked them from Hannibal Lecter’s head. “Are you excited to graduate?”

“Yes ma’am.”

When I’m nervous I get really polite. “Are you two hungry? I made enough to feed everyone and send john home with plenty of leftovers.”

“Thank you ma’am.” My boner was about to burst through my pants.

“Call me Kathy, or mom if you want to.”

“OK Kathy, I’ll remember that.” “Where are my manners? I almost forgot to mention that we hug in this family.”

Oh, please no. Not now at this exact moment.

“Stand up and give me a hug, mister.” No no no no no! There was no way I have escaped this situation without killing two people and hiding the bodies. I did it. I stood up and hugged this woman.

As soon as it happened I could feel my member press into her, she knew, I knew she knew because she backed away from it, as soon as she did I had an involuntary twitch the for a split second pushed it back into her thigh. We parted from our hug, we both tried to be polite, but the shame had set in. Dinner was awkward, I wolfed down my food without making eye contact with Kathy. I made an excuse to leave after dinner, went home, rubbed one out, and wallowed in shame and embarrassment.

The Moment 15 People Realized They Were Dating Total Idiots

Have you ever been in love? Have you ever been in love until you realize one day you’re dating a complete moron? Then you’re not so in love anymore? I mean, it can be satisfying to date someone who is dumber than you (so you can feel superior), but it’s also kind of embarrassing.

Take a look at these 15 stories from people who share exactly when they realized they were dating an idiot.

1. A present from the cat

Photo Credit: Reddit

2. Pistachio Shells

Photo Credit: Twitter

3. Genius!

Photo Credit: Reddit

4. “Not everyone went to college.”

Photo Credit: Reddit

5. I told my boyfriend I didn’t feel good and asked him to pick up a thermometer.

Photo Credit: Reddit

6. My girlfriend asked what “No” on this switch meant.

Photo Credit: Reddit

7. I asked my wife to bring me my shoes. She said, “the Opaads?”

Photo Credit: Reddit

8. How my wife unpacked the new cable.

Photo Credit: Reddit

9. So Real

Photo Credit: Reddit

10. A modern-day Magellan

Photo Credit: Reddit

11. My husband asked my gynecologist if he was a Texas Longhorns fan.

Photo Credit: Reddit

12. Breast Feeding

Photo Credit: Reddit

13. Well, is it?

Photo Credit: Reddit

14. Noun

Photo Credit: Reddit

15. I am 5’1″. I asked my 6’2″ husband to hang a mirror for me.

Photo Credit: Imgur

h/t: Bored Panda

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Take a Look at These ‘What Women Don’t Want From Men’ Tweets to Keep Up to Speed

Now’s the time for all the guys out there to listen up. The ladies are pretty sick and tired of being treated the way they have been, so they’ve taken to Twitter to vent their frustrations.

There is a lot of good information in here that I think everyone can benefit from.

So let’s take a look at these ‘What Women Don’t Want From Men’ tweets to educate ourselves.

1. First and foremost.

2. Just don’t do it.

3. They’re your kids, dude.

4. Kinda funny, isn’t it?

5. We’re equal, huh?

6. You’re full of it.

7. That doesn’t impress them.

8. This is a good one.

9. Don’t owe you anything.

10. And then there are these guys…

Pretty interesting and informative, if I do say so myself.

Ladies and gentlemen, what do you think? Do these things affect your relationships?

Tell us about it in the comments!

The post Take a Look at These ‘What Women Don’t Want From Men’ Tweets to Keep Up to Speed appeared first on UberFacts.