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People Admit Skills That They Just Can’t Master

Things are hard sometimes…

I’m talking about all kinds of things that other people seem to pick up easily that you just can’t get the hang of.

You have some of these things in your life, right?

AskReddit users went on the record and shared the common skills they can’t seem to master.

1. Small talk.

“Talking to people. Small talk.

I’m fine with people I already know, or have lots in common with, can talk for 10 hours a day about nothing. But when it comes to strangers…

What the hell is going on? Why are you talking to me, what do you want? Please just be direct.

I don’t want to play mind games. i don’t want to guess what your intentions are. Just tell me. How can I help you?

Drives me insane.”

2. Maddening.

“Winning an argument with my husband.

The more worked up I get, the calmer he gets, it’s pretty maddening.”

3. What did you say?

“Listening.

I can look someone in the eyes, while they’re arm’s length from me, and not hear what they’re saying because there’s a loud noise 100 feet away that my brain latches onto.

I frequently have to ask people to repeat themselves at work, where there’s a few continuous background noises, and while I can distinguish those noises from each other, I can’t f*cking hear people.

I know it’s not a physical issue, because I’ve been cleaning my ears out several times a week just to make sure.”

4. This is me.

“Estimating people’s ages:

Me:”So I think our sons are the same age…is he also 12?”

Them:” No, he is almost 25.”

Me: “Maybe I was thinking of your other son. ”

Them: “My other child is a daughter. ”

Me: ” Is she 12?”

Them: ” Huh? ”

Me: ” Nevermind, you must have just been standing next to another kid or something. ”

Them: ” I’m in a wheelchair. ”

Me: ” How old is it?””

5. The simple things.

“Knowing my left from my right.

Or simple math. I can visualize big things, but the simple things elude me.”

6. Look into my eyes.

“Eye contact.

I’m not shy, not anxious or anything like that but my parents never told me that eyecontact is normal and only in my teenage years did I discover that eye contact is normal.

I always thought that since i didn’t like being stared at, others wouldn’t like it either.”

7. A hot mess.

“Makeup and doing hair.

Basically anything girly.

I always look a mess no matter how hard I try compared to literally every other girl I know.”

8. That’s odd.

“I can’t use scissors.

The majority of the time I can’t get scissors to cut bags and paper smoothly. I have to call my wife in so that she can cut it for me while making endless mockeries of me.

She says it has something to do with the part of the blade I’m using to make contact with the surface of what I’m trying to cut. Been trying to improve the last 3 years we’ve been married and I’m not better.”

9. Please stay off the road.

“Driving… 🙁

I wanted to believe I could learn, and everyone tried to tell me it was so easy but I’m really losing hope. I just don’t think I’m capable. Even my driving instructor is sick of me. She was so nice before, now she just yells at me and thinks I’m not trying when I am.

I can’t focus, my mind constantly wanders and I have little slips in attention all the time no matter how much I try to just focus on driving, sometimes only being snapped out of it when someone yells at me or something dangerous is about to happen (like almost drifting into a semi in the other lane…..) I constantly miss things.

I can’t remember road rules or recall them the moment I need them, my reaction time is slow and by the time someone else would already be reacting I’m noticing the thing to react to and haven’t acted yet… I’ve been compared to a drunk driver. Honestly the drunk driver probably drives better than me.

There’s so much input at once and you’re supposed to just take it all in and act accordingly but I can’t even begin to process any of it, and certainly not as quickly as I need to in a driving environment so I just shut down, and then panic because I have no idea what to do. This is especially common at intersections.

I need time to analyze the situation and think through things carefully before deciding on a course of action but quite frankly when driving that time is not there, I can’t just sit there and think it through before every action.

So I get to an intersection and while I’m trying to figure out what to do I get yelled at because of course I haven’t figured it out fast enough and I’m expected to do something NOW NOW NOW.

There’s way too much to focus on and it’s overwhelming… There also is no consistency in driving, the driving environment is always changing which stresses me and confuses me immensely. You’re constantly having to adapt to something new.

My spacial awareness is atrocious and I have no idea where the car is in relation to other objects or if I’m centered in my lane. The view out the mirrors doesn’t really help me fully “get” what’s actually going on behind me. Even though I can see where a car is behind me in the mirror, I can’t actually conceptualize where the car is on the road unless I turn my head and look back.

Speaking of which, shoulder checks are scary, I hate taking my eyes off of what’s in front of the vehicle. Apparently when I shoulder check I turn my whole body, but sure how to stop doing that. When I try to park on the side of the road I end up several feet from the curb.

It messes me up even more that you’re not centered in a vehicle—if the drivers seat + steering was centered in the vehicle like a bicycle or an atv it would be so much easier and less confusing, but no, we get this far left side bullsh*t that screws everything up. Who the f*ck designed vehicles that way? Whyyyyyyyyyy????

The concept of “scanning” is too vague. Where do I put my eyes? How long do you look in each spot? Do you just keep looking randomly around and hope you’re watching the right things? Is there a specific method for where you move your eyes and is it the same each time or does it change depending on environment? How long do you keep your gaze on one spot?

How are you supposed to remember to constantly check your mirrors every 5 seconds? If “the car goes where you look” then how are you supposed to constantly shift your gaze to different parts of the driving scene and pick a specific point in the distance to focus on at the same time?

Are you really supposed to trust your peripherals that much? Half the time I don’t even notice if something is at the edge of my vision, the focus stays on what’s in front of me. How does anyone keep sustained attention for an entire drive without zoning out anyway? How does every drive not exhaust people to the point where you feel burnt out the rest of the day for the effort?

How do you just ignore the fact that one little mistake could kill you, or someone else? And how could you not be expected to make mistakes when learning something new? People when I ask are just like “don’t crash” yeah, thanks, you think anyone ever does it on purpose?

It’s bizzare that we just people who are just learning in the middle of traffic and expect them to “just learn” and that nobody will ever make deadly mistakes. Driving accidents are among the top causes of death in the Western world, driving is extremely dangerous no matter how you look at it. People will say “oh but you can’t worry about the inevitable.” It’s not unpreventable or unpredictable.

If I don’t drive I won’t get in a car crash. But you say: “well if you’re in someone else’s car you could still be in an accident as a passenger.” Yes. But considering the above, it’s much more likely to happen if I drive.

And yet, some part of me still longs to learn because getting rides all the time f*cking sucks and I just want the normal ability to drive like everyone else… 😭 FML.”

10. That’s not good.

“Making Kraft Mac and Cheese.

I’m a reasonably skilled cook. I know my way around a kitchen and I cook almost all of the meals for my house.

But for some reason I am incapable of making simple boxed Mac & Cheese that’s anything remotely palatable. I follow the instructions on the box and it comes out runny and soupy. I eyeball the ingredients and it’s just a mushy paste.

I’ve narrowed the point of failure down to the mixing of the Butter/Milk/Cheese Powder so at this point if that’s what I’m making then I just boil the noodles and call my S/O in to do the final steps by working whatever Alchemical affront to the natural order she uses to make it work.

Then I add pepper…”

Are there some common skills that you can’t seem to figure out?

If so, please share with us in the comments.

We’d love to hear from you!

The post People Admit Skills That They Just Can’t Master appeared first on UberFacts.

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Does Anyone Really Buy These Fake Moments in Movies?

I really love movies, but I find myself rolling my eyes at least a few times when I’m watching anything that was made in Hollywood.

A lot of the plot points are absurdly unrealistic.

Despite being so hard to believe and physically impossible, a lot of these incorrect cliches appear over and over again in the movies.

Here are 18 people who also call B.S. on these false cliches in movies.

1. Are movie couches made of bulletproof vests?

Are people shooting at you?

Take cover behind… anything!

Car doors, drywall, couches, tables, cardboard boxes, it doesn’t matter!

EVERYTHING is bulletproof!

2. What cashier can afford THAT apartment?

The fresh out of college student scoring a great apartment in a swanky part of town while working minimum wage job for themselves.

In reality, you’d have 4 roommates for such a place, or you’re living in a dump in a bad part of town.

3. Does anyone buy this?

That everyone in a Tom Cruise movie is the same height or shorter than him…

4. Who else yells at the screen?

Whenever some idiot is running on foot while being chased by a car that’s trying to run them down, they without fail ALWAYS run straight down the middle of the street.

All they have to do is simply run off to the side where there’s trees and lamp-posts and plenty of other sh*t to block them from getting hit.

In that case, I always root for whoever’s driving.

5. I get blisters looking at pics of the sun.

Fire, Lava, etc. has no heat- people can be suspended over a volcano.

Or in the case of The Hobbit, SURF ON MOLTEN METAL and no one gets so much as a blister.

6. Martyrs

The member of the group that sacrifices themselves for no reason.

7. My ventriloquist skills could come in handy

Acting like an easily removable piece of duct tape silences someone.

8. Those hackers have some kind of superpower

Hackers in movies:

*enters a few keystrokes*

“I’m in!”

9. Why does stalking = life partner? Ugh

Guys who get rejected and then stalk the girl and win her over at the end of the movie.

10. I mean, I’m not a doctor, but…

Drowning revivals.

Victim is pulled, blue, from the water.

Couple of chest compressions, hero through gritted teeth says “don’t you die on me goddammit”,

Small arc of water shoots from the mouth of the victim as they cough twice and immediately regain consciousness, sit up and ask what happened.

Alright.

11. Movie characters have no manners.

No one ever says goodbye on the phone.

12. Maybe some movie viewers have a slurping fetish, Karen!

When a character gets a full cup of a drink with a straw and they sip and it makes a slurping noise.

Drinking through a straw doesn’t make a slurping sound until the near end of the drink.

13. If I got shot in the leg I’d be crying and asking to be carried!

When getting shot, stabbed, bones broken and beaten seems to have no physical detriment on a character.

Get shot in the leg? Still able to run.

Stabbed in the back? Still able to finish a fight.

Ridiculous.

14. I never trust anyone who leaves without finishing their pizza!

People order food or drink in a restaurant, get the food, never touch it and decide it’s time to go.

15. For me it’s like two minutes.

Standing under the shower head when you turn on the shower.

Dat sh*t way too cold.

16. If I didn’t restrain my cowlick it would land on my eyeball!

Women in action movies/sequences always wearing their hair down.

Trust me: if there is any running, jumping, climbing trees, we’re putting that sh*t up in a ponytail.

17. Nobody at school never noticed my late ’90s sparkly frosted eye shadow

Nerdy girl starts wearing makeup EVERYONE notices it the next day.

18. Well, it gives me time to make popcorn before I come back

The last 30 seconds on the bomb timer lasts 5 minutes or more.

It’s good to know that a lot of people who watch movies have enough common sense to know this stuff is ridiculous, but at least it’s entertaining!

What fake movie moments drive you up the wall? Leave us a comment!

The post Does Anyone Really Buy These Fake Moments in Movies? appeared first on UberFacts.

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People Think Things Are Romantic Dealbreakers

When you go through a breakup and you tell your friends and family about it, the first question is usually, “what happened?”

But often, there’s no big specific thing that “happened” just a trait that made one or both of you realize you just couldn’t be together. Traits like the ones discussed here:

What opinion or behaviour would stop you being romantically interested in someone even if they ticked every other box? from AskReddit

Let’s see what some of the big turn offs are for the people of Reddit.

1. Mind your manners.

Someone who is a bad guest at someone else’s house.

– Cyllev

2. Things happen.

A girl told me she had been engaged six times. She was 29.

I know things happen. But that’s a lot of things.

– J*ckingOffToTragedy

3.  A matter of expression.

“How come you don’t express yourself?”

*proceeds to express myself*

“You’re being too emotional!”.

F*ck outta here with that sh*t.

– Some_Hot_Garbage

4. A little bit.

If the person you are dating makes you feel small. Not in a physical sense but like you’re less than them.

I’ve learned thats my first sign to book it out of there.

– abbyfromhr

5. Don’t look down.

Being condescending. I hate it. It makes me angry.

Be nice to people. Accept they may not be as knowledgeable as you on a subject. Don’t condescend.

– Crazyboutdogs

6. Prized possessions.

Hoarding – I made this mistake once, I got into a relationship with a hoarder.

I eventually realized that her deeply dysfunctional relationship to objects extended to the people around her.

I was not an actual person, I was just another acquisition that was acquired and subsequently treated shabbily.

I’m not sure if this is common but I won’t take the chance again.

– nibo001

7. So shallow.

Extreme materialism.

– ace985

8. Going deep.

He told me he would much rather make small talk with a stranger then have a deep conversation with good friends.

I don’t know why I didn’t see it before but that described perfectly why we never connected on a deeper level after being together for two years.

We tried but I couldn’t make it work after that realization

– yuffieisathief

9. The company you keep.

If they have toxic friends. For a lot of reasons.

– Insane_Membranes

10. Phoning it in.

The need to constantly be on your phone.

Totally fine with spending a lot of time on it, but if you can’t put it down to watch a movie or have a conversation then it’s a problem.

– Fisherman_Gabe

11. Lies.

Dishonesty.

If you notice the person you’re interested in tells fibs or little white lies early on, it’s only going to be catastrophic once you clear the honeymoon phase

– drknockb00ts

12. You stink.

Bad hygiene

– _Yanu_

13. So full of yourself.

Entitled behavior.

People who act like the world owes them everything when they were raised with more than most people.

People who demand respect but treat others poorly.

– bangcamaroxx

14. Talk talk talk.

Someone who always talks but never really says anything.

Say what you mean, mean what you say

– reddicyoulous

15. Going clear.

Scientology

– CandyRepresentative4

Yeah, I can see pretty much any of those ending an otherwise good thing.

What would you add to this list?

Tell us in the comments.

The post People Think Things Are Romantic Dealbreakers appeared first on UberFacts.

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If You’re Super Weird, You Should Consider These Personal Warning Labels

There’s pretty much a warning label on anything you come across anymore – except for the one place where we probably need to see more warnings, and that’s on our fellow human people.

So it comes to no surprise that the fine folks over at reddit asked the following question…

If people came with a warning tag, what would yours be? from AskReddit

For the good of those around you, consider these warning labels (courtesy of the people of Reddit) to apply to yourself if you fit one of the following descriptions:

1. Annoying.

Tolerable only in small doses.

– nomopyt

2. Attached.

Warning: becomes attached to people very easily.

– WirelessTrees

3. Defective.

As is. All sales final.

– danthemandaran

4. Lazy.

Caution: Hard to motivate.

Interests may change randomly, mental stability not guaranteed.

– DrWillz

5. Drunk.

Do not mix with alcohol.

– goat_on_a_float

6. Narcoleptic.

Short Battery life but charges quickly (I’m narcoleptic lol)

– sl33p1ng-s3nt1nl

7. A bunch of people.

Identity disorder

It may say something like:

“Buy one, get one free”

– Burrito-8

8. Farty.

Warning. May contain gas.

– BeefGravy-on-Chicken

9. Fiery.

Caution: Explosive material. Authorised personnel only

– OverDepreciated

10. Retentive.

I’ll remember everything you’ve said and it’ll be awkward when i bring it up in a few years as if it’s nothing.

– DarthMurdok

11. Awkward.

Warning. Believes it is funny. Is not. May give off jokes at inappropriate times. Do not leave unattended at social gatherings.

– TannedCroissant

12. A lot.

Do not remove from container without good reason. Contents of this package are surprisingly enjoyable but wears out easily with overuse. Liable to expire at any time, no refund available.

Store with cats for best results.

– BlackoutXForever

13. Apologetic.

Warning: I’m sorry for apologizing so much.

– DylThaGamer_

14. Caring.

Caution: gives a sh*t.

– boyvsfood2

15. A niche expert.

Warning: may tell you disturbing facts about animal genitalia.

– Frantastic79

I could probably do with a few of those.

What would your warning label say?

Tell us in the comments.

The post If You’re Super Weird, You Should Consider These Personal Warning Labels appeared first on UberFacts.

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People Share What It’s Like to Actually Get With Your Crush

What’s it like when you actually crush it with your crush?

That’s what Reddit user ExtraCirpyTater wanted too know, and so do most of us:

What is it like to successfully get with your crush? from AskReddit

So what’s it like, this mythic experience? Let’s find out from those who have been there.

1. “Changes a lot.”

In 4 words: Not how you Imagine.

Look, the magic of crushes lays on the image you have of them (doesn’t matter if you are friends or not) cause even if you are, relationship changes a lot when you actually get together.

But it also feels pretty f*cking awesome the first moments cause, I mean, you got your crush!!

– phxnticsanders

2. “Somewhat false.”

Bittersweet.

Because you find out how the image of then you built up is somewhat false.

– Gopnik_Luigi

3. “Wanting feels better than having.”

If it’s someone you also view as a bestie, you might be pretty lucky.

Otherwise, sometimes wanting feels better than having.

– dynamicDiscovery

4. “Amazing.”

It’s d*mn amazing as long as you remember they have flaws just like you do.

If you made a perfect image of them it’s about to crumble and you’re gonna be disappointed.

– LittleTomori

5. “Until…”

Amazing, until he breaks up with you months later out of the blue, and because you’ve invested so much emotional energy into this relationship, you fall into a deep depression that you can’t get out of until you’ve physically moved away two years later

– jolygoestoschool

6. “So far it’s been great.”

I married mine 14 years later.

In high school I always thought he was sooo hot and sweet (and apparently he was attracted to me too) but I didn’t think I stood a chance so I never spoke up.

We drifted apart after graduation but after a really bad break up 14 years later, drunk me thought it’d be a good idea to get back in touch with him.

I still can’t believe we’re married (3 years now!). I still look at him and think “F*ck he’s hot.” We are basically the same person so he’s really easy to get along with but I’m glad we didn’t date in high school because I was really stupid and insecure and I would have f*cked it all up.

There were definitely moments where I became a high school girl again saying “OMMGG!” when I’d tell my friends about us dating, getting engaged, etc.

So far it’s been great but I got lucky my crush was actually a good person and not a handsome *sshole.

– MacNPickles

7. “It’s like my brain knew!”

Moved to college and the next morning I had to go to a required group-orientation/tour with people in my department. I happen to stand next to this cute girl who I decide to say hi to and we chat for the next 20 min. She was the first person I met on campus I hadn’t met in my residence hall. We say bye and I don’t see her for the rest of the day.

Somehow, I instantly knew I liked her and wanted to be more than friends, even though I only met her once. However, it turned out she had a boyfriend who went to school nearby. We ended up being classmates every semester and going into the same major.

After 3 years of school, some drama and way too many coincidences for our relationship to be considered normal, we got together and discovered how crazy compatible we were.

It’s honestly like my brain knew the whole time!

– EggsAisle27

8. “Lucky.”

Well, not really me but my brother, lucky man.

He had a crush on a girl that had an old crush on him too, so it was only natural they’d get together.

Well, this girl is like a younger sister I’ve never had, and even though she’s my brother’s girlfriend now, we spend more time in sleepovers and talking about him than he does with her. (I’m a girl) Basically, she’s my bff now.

– Aaruni_2008

9. “It certainly worked for me.”

I had a huge crush on a guy in my friends group who was married.

We became very good friends but always appropriate because he was married. He confessed he was unhappy in his marriage. I suggested they go to therapy because he would regret it if he didn’t give his marriage every chance.

He told his wife he wanted to go to counseling. She said she didn’t care that much and they should probably just break up and moved out.

The next week I swooped in and told him how I felt. Terrible idea. Rebound, all that.

We’ve been married 11 years now.

I’d never tell someone to confess their love to a friend going through a divorce but it certainly worked for me.

– WaffleFoxes

10. “I dodged a bullet.”

I crushed on a man for 3 years. This man was my manager.

Eventually, he moved to a different department and he and his long-term girlfriend broke up. We began dating. Holy crap… BEST FEELING EVER. I was head over heels for him and it felt like I was constantly on cloud 9, especially when he introduced me to his daughter and family. I felt like… life could not get any better. The man I was pining for, for so many years finally wanted me too, plus I was persistent and that is what drew him to me. It felt so good to do all the things I wanted to do with him, like kissing and being intimate… going for long drives and cuddling.

BUT, yes, as someone mentioned below, it can be bittersweet too. The image you have built up is false and you find out about other things about them that are… major red flags. Sadly, we rushed into living together, and we fell apart so quickly. He brought out the worst in me and took advantage of me – I thought because he loved me and treated me nicely that we would last while he treated other people really badly. Eventually, I became someone he could treat badly, and this was all within one month of moving in together, I knew by the second weekend I had made a mistake.

It hurts if there is incompatibility, but can be bliss if you are both compatible. Sometimes it’s not worth it to get your crush. Now not only have I lost someone who was my friend, but I also lost my love. But he constantly brings me down and I feel like sh*t every time we speak so I guess I dodged a bullet.

– Whisky-Baby15

11. “Sweet victory.”

Sweet Victory

…she was different (and more fun and passionate) than what I perceived her to be. I wasn’t expecting her to be it for me… didn’t even consider it. We both still shake our heads wondering why the hell we were never together sooner. And why we wasted time on loser relationships lol Yet maybe it wasn’t the right time for us earlier. I dunno

My approach:

I figured a lot of guys were hitting on her. I didn’t. I just got to know her better over messaging (we used to work together 5 years ago but she moved away). Finally we met for drinks and sparks flew. Then I came to visit her and I never left and she asked me to move in with her.

– blue1k

12. “The worst.”

I had a huge crush on this guy – we ended up hooking up – and he was the WORST kisser.

I didn’t even think being “bad at kissing” was really a thing because it’s not rocket science really.

But it was the worst.

– Pleasant-Flamingo344

13. “Too married.”

I fell in love with someone who was married … Too fast, too much, too, well … married.

But things changed, life moved on and now we’re two weeks away from celebrating our 15th anniversary.

I definitely had them built up in my mind, we have certainly been through ups and downs, but I know how lucky I am every d*mn day to have found them.

Sometimes it’s so much more than you even dreamed it could be.

– the_0zz

14. “Feelings evaporated.”

I crushed on a gorgeous South African blonde for a few months.

We made out and it was great.

Then I got to know the person better and turns out, my crush was not very intelligent.

Feelings evaporated like that *snap.

– whynotaskwhynotask

15. “It’s like…”

Its like putting the USB in perfectly the first time

– AmbitiousJellyTube

Maybe it’s because I’m just not a hopeless romantic, but I seriously doubt anything can feel as good as that last one.

Have you gotten with your crush? What was it like?

Tell us in the comments.

The post People Share What It’s Like to Actually Get With Your Crush appeared first on UberFacts.

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Read About Some of the Greatest Wedding Faux Pas Ever Witnessed

The older you get, the more weddings you’re gonna go to.

Most are tame, and nothing out of the ordinary happens.

However, when emotions are high and booze is in abundance, there is bound to be some chaos.

What is the greatest wedding faux pas you’ve ever witnessed? from AskWomen

In case you haven’t been lucky enough to witness wedding disaster, AskReddit (or in this case, it’s offshoot AskWomen) is the perfect place to read up on stories that will make you thankful you are still single.

1. We Are Gathered Here To Say Our Goodbyes

“I was officiating the second wedding of my friend’s parents and when it came time for them to read their vows the groom, thinking he was funny, started reading from the obituaries he had clipped from the paper.

The bride was not pleased and it got real awkward for a second.”

– ladyintheatre

2. Drama With The Groom’s Mama

“Recently I went to a wedding of a childhood friend; we aren’t that close anymore but we’re on good terms. She’s Chinese American, married a white guy from New Orleans. Others in the bride’s party mentioned to me that it seems like there’s a bit of drama with the groom’s mom….and that they been getting the impression that this is the first time the groom’s parents have really interacted with Asians….and I heard the groom’s mom tried talking him out of this marriage.

I’ve known the couple for a few years and they are great together and really match. He defended his bride all the way to the mom.

Faux Pas: the groom’s mom and her family talking loudly, at the wedding/reception, about how the marriage isn’t going to last. Them taking bets about how long they think they will be together before the ‘inevitable’ divorce.”

– finalDraft_v012

3. A Classy Event

“Bride was sh*t faced and climbed under the head table and proceeded to suck her new hubbies d*ck. Later that night she passed out in between the elevator and lobby…her t*ts had popped completely out of her vomit covered dress.

At the end of the night the groom had to open envelopes from wedding gifts to scrape together the money to pay the limo driver.

My date and I went up to his grooms men’s hotel room where we saw the groom and his friends shooting heroin while his wife lay naked on the bed completely out cold.

It was quite an event.”

– Prisoner-655321

4. LOOK AT ME!!

“Drunk girl grabbed the microphone from the bride and slurred a teary, broken speech to the awestruck guests. 300 person wedding. Expensive, classy affair

The words of the speech were about how great the bride was but the purpose of the speech was to say “LOOK AT ME!”.

Other things this woman has done at weddings: dressed inappropriately (ladies, there is nothing morally wrong with you dressing how you like but at a wedding please try to consider the likelihood of nip slips/cooter flashing when at a classy affair) and more or less lap danced with the groom, is a repeat offender for nip slips, tried to drive home drunk, passed out in the bathroom, started fights, and stolen dates.

She is getting married soon.

I briefly entertained the notion of showing up at her wedding and doing all the things she did to others. The woman is a walking faux pas.”

– [User Deleted]

5. So Three Priests Walk Into A Bar…

“Priest was hand picked by the couple because the bride worked with him at the Archdiocese.

He is an hour late, and keeps getting the couple’s names wrong.

He is walking with braces and crutches, and he keeps making handicapped jokes.

Good times.”

– [User Deleted]

6. Run Away Sister

“The last wedding I photographed, the sister just got incredibly drunk. I felt really bad because it honestly seemed like she had a severe drinking problem because she was absolutely off her rocker in the way someone on crack would be. She was shoeless, screaming, barfing, and spitting at people and bawling outside the reception hall where my work partner and I were taking our dinner break at the time.

This was maybe one hour after the ceremony had ended, and there was ZERO liquor allowed at that particular venue.

Eventually she ended up in the gravel parking lot, still screaming and crying. She lost her balance several times and fell face first into the gravel twice.

Last I saw her, she was sitting up against the car surrounded by 3 or 4 people and just crying before they loaded her into the back seat to pass out.

Two hours later my partner and I came out for a smoke break and overheard that she had escaped and people were looking for her…”

– [User Deleted]

7. Hot Mama

“At my sister’s wedding reception, her new MIL got pretty wasted. She was complaining about the way her wrap skirt was fitting, so she opened it up completely at the edge of the dance floor and flashed my aunt.

When she went outside to smoke she started chatting up some random 20 yr olds who were also out there smoking and invited them into the reception to join her at the open bar.

Those guys then started trying to grind on the 12-14 yr old girls that were dancing at the reception and had to be strong armed to leave.”

– MadtownMaven

8. Racism Is Alive And Well

“The father of the bride started his toast with, ‘When I heard my daughter was engaged to a negro I said to myself, Oh no!’ He then proceeded to list every black stereotype he was afraid his new son in law would have.

He ended the toast with, ‘But Son in Law proved me wrong. Son in Law taught me that some negroes are okay.’ Then there was a lot of kissing and clapping from the Bride and her family. It was sooooo f*cking awful. The Groom’s family was mostly silent, except for the father of the groom who was angrily mumbling ‘Negro?!’ for the rest of the night.”

– Moxiecontin

9. NASCAR or Die

“The mother of the bride is, apparently, a huge Nascar fan. She made sure to let the bride and groom know at the rehearsal dinner that she would have to leave the reception early so she could watch the race.

Sure as sh*t, she left the reception hall mid-way through the meal. Pretty surprising stuff, because I’ve known the bride since grade school and she’s always been a pretty classy girl.”

– meaty87

10. Let’s Make This Legal!

“I don’t know if it’s considered a faux-pas, but I was at a wedding once where they did the whole signing the marriage license in front of everybody thing at the end of the ceremony.

The bride and one of the witnesses ended up signing the marriage license in the wrong place, so that the groom was briefly ‘married’ to the maid of honor, the bride’s best friend, until they could correct the mistake at the reception.

They played it off as a funny accident but some of the bride’s older family members seemed pretty upset!”

– paranoid_paratroopa

11. Don’t Do That

“My mother got completely trashed and showed up at the door of our honeymoon suite wearing nothing but a bathmat.

She then climbed into our bed and threw up in our garbage can.

Don’t do that.”

– sexyarmadillo

12. Makeshift Dildos

“In 7th grade, I went to my old 4th grade teacher’s wedding. The maid of honor got plastered and proceeded to give a very…inappropriate speech.

It was a while ago, so I don’t remember all the details, but one of the incidents recounted in the speech was my ex-teacher using a golf club to imitate a dong.”

– [User Deleted]

13. Who Says You Can Only Wear Your Wedding Dress Once?

“The groom’s cousin had got married at the start of wedding season, then had her strapless off-white wedding dress shortened to knee length.

She wore it at several weddings that summer, including at least two at which the bride was also wearing a strapless off-white gown. ”

– plasticcastle

I’ve been to my share of awkward weddings, but these really take the cake.

Do you have a crazy wedding story?

Tell us in the comments.

The post Read About Some of the Greatest Wedding Faux Pas Ever Witnessed appeared first on UberFacts.

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Family Traditions That Will Make You Say…Huh?

Do you think your family is weird?

These AskReddit users dished on their weirdest family traditions and boy…

What are your WTF family traditions? from AskReddit

It’s nice to know there are families out there who are crazier than mine!

1. Let’s Get Ready To Rumble!

“The aunts fight. I mean like literally fight. They will get wasted and just get louder and louder and then one will shout something along the lines of, “You want to back that up?” and then they will go outside and fight.

We all watch and cheer for our favorite aunt to win and sometimes we will even video tape the fight so that we can watch it later and laugh about it. It is pretty normal.”

– Stregano

2. Turtle Power

“Every year on Christmas before we could open anything my dad used to make us do the Ninja Turtles Dance.

He would take lead and my sister and I would have to do it behind him while my mom recorded it. Thinking back I find it hilarious.”

– VSavrek

3. Sacred Cow

“My mother has always put a cow puppet on top of the Christmas tree instead of an angel.”

– the_humble_saiyajin

4. The Last Fry

“It’s more between my brother and I than our whole family.

Whenever we’d eat at a fast food place we would play “The last fry”, and it was just that, the one that ate the last fry won.

Sometimes we’d hide it for hours then eat it and say “MMMM IT TASTE SOOOO GOOD WHEN ITS THE LAAAAAST FRY!!!”

One time I put my fry in my backpack and found it a couple weeks later, totally won that time.”

– Totesmcgotes702

5. Brain Freeze

“When I was a kid, the aunts and uncles would get all the kids a gallon of their favorite ice cream on the 4th of July. They would sit us down at a table and give us all our ice cream at the same time.

Here’s the fun part. The first kid to tackle the entire gallon of ice cream got $5. This always lead to all of us kids eating ice cream very quickly, and thus getting brain freeze (ice cream headache).

Within minutes there are a half dozen children roaming the backyard clutching at their sinuses in pain while adults laugh at them. I’m so glad I finally caught on.”

– LordofMylar

6. Slap Dat Turkey

“Whenever we make a turkey or goose for Thanksgiving and Christmas, we have to slap it. I don’t know why.

The slapping takes place when the turkey is in the roasting pan, you just slap it with moderate force, about the force you would use to slap a fly or mosquito on your leg.

Whenever I asked my Grandmom, she would sing “it’s tradition!” and never answer the question beyond that.”

– shaven_craven

7. The Potato

“Whenever anyone of us has to take an exam, they take a single uncooked potato with them.

This has been tradition ever since my Grampa found one in his pocket after acing his driving test.

We’re not a particularly superstitious family otherwise, but The Potato has proven itself indispensable.”

– schnitzli

8. Oh, He Died

“My sister accidentally started a tradition when she was a kid. She wandered into my parent’s room one evening after watching TV and asked them, “Who is John Belushi?” I think she was 8 or 9 at the time. My parents, who were big fans, told her who he was and then asked her why she wanted to know. Her response was “oh, he died” and she wandered out of their room.

She did the same thing about a week later with another celebrity and my parents, having forgotten about how she asked about John Belushi responded the same way, explaining who the celebrity was and then asking why and got the same response from my sister “oh, he died”.

Now whenever there is a celebrity death, everyone in my family and several family friends rush to call/text someone else in the family so they can be the first person to report it and the call/text always starts with “Who is ___?!” and usually the other person responds with “oh no, how did they die?!” The person who manages to tell someone else first usually is referred to as “winning” that round.

We’re a little morbid.”

– carpecarp1

9. Stealin With Grandma

“My grandma used to take us “junkin”.

As an adult I realized what we were doing is stealing from the Salvation Army.”

– Daimoth

10. Personal Space Heaters

“Hound stealin’.

It’s close to sacrilege in our family, but that doesn’t stop us. Our dogs (two whippets and a Treeing Walker coon hound) sleep in our beds with us, and on cold winter nights we’ll sometimes sneak into each other’s rooms and steal a dog out from under the covers and carry them to our own beds.

By sometimes I mean every single night.”

– JesusSwallows

11. ’Twas The Night Before Christmas

“You can open one present on Christmas Eve, but its chosen by your siblings.

Leading to lots of under the table negotiations, and the eventual selection of the smallest or least interesting looking present.

If you were really p*ssed off, you chose a card to be opened. Lots of fights were had.”

– [User Deleted]

12. 6 Out Of 10

“Not my family, but my ex-girlfriend who is Ukrainian (this fact is important to the story) has really weird family traditions.

When she was in elementary school her dad used to wake her and her brother up 2 hours before school everyday. Then he would put on a cassette tape of Ukranian folk songs and they would take turns singing. When one of them finished a song he would hold up a card with a number between 1 and 10 written on it to rate their performance. Still cracks me up when I think about it.

Her family did a lot of weird things.”

– I_BLAME_YOUR_MOTHER

13. SHOTS!

“My great grandma used to do body shots off of babies.

Whenever a family member would come over with their baby, my great grandma would check to see if the soft spot on their head had closed up. If it hadn’t, she’d put tequila on the soft spot and suck it off of our heads.

She did it apparently to close the hole faster, because evil spirits come in from that hole and she believed that it took them out.

Some of my aunts still do this.”

– ghostlesbian

14. Run Away Cake

“On Easter we used to eat a bunny cake with only one ear, because my Uncle ran away once as a little kid, and he took the ear with him.

He came back a few hours later when everyone was looking for him having already eaten the ear.”

– [User Deleted]

15. Alice’s Restaurant

“Every year, our Thanksgiving consists of all the neighborhood strays, usually around 25 people. The food is glorious and wine is plentiful.

When everyone is seated for dinner, my dad does a toast and then turns on the song Alice’s Restaurant. Our entire family and regular guests sing the song as it’s being played.

The newcomers are usually a little mortified and stunned that

A) 20 people are singing the same song around the dinner table.

B) we know ALL the words

C) the song is so damn long.

I’ve grown to love this tradition.”

– LilySapphire

16. The Wolf Pack

“My brother-in-law thought the “three wolf moon” shirts were hilarious so he bought one. My husband also thought it was funny so he bought one with more wolves on it (to up the ante). My sister and I then bought a wolf shirt for my dad so he could fit in with the guys.

They wear these shirts in public when they are all together and call themselves the “wolf pack.” My parents even named their boat “three wolf moon.”

My sister and I are both due to have little boys this winter. We are on the hunt for wolf onsies…”

– swankengr

No matter what happens in life, there will never be anybody quite like family.

What’s a strange tradition you and yours have?

Tell us in the comments.

The post Family Traditions That Will Make You Say…Huh? appeared first on UberFacts.

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15 Times People Turned From Totally Cool To Total Zeros

Finding out that someone you’ve known a long time is living a disturbing other life can really shake you to your core.

It’s the kind of thing that stays with you and collects in corners of the internet like this Ask Reddit thread:

When did you realize that someone you were cool with your whole life was actually really messed up? from AskReddit

Fair warning, these stories include descriptions of drugs, violence, r*pe, and child abuse/sexualization.

1. “I tried to guilt trip her.”

I had a cousin a couple years older than me who was killed in a car accident in his mid twenties.

My younger sister didn’t want to go to the funeral, and I tried to guilt trip her because her excuse was that she was spending the weekend with her boyfriend.

A month after the funeral, she told me that our deceased cousin had molested her when she was younger.

– shoopvedoobop

2. “Always a little weird.”

This guy was always a little weird, but we got along well. And then on a break from college while I was at my parents’ house, his mug shot showed up on the local news as a person of interest in a child p*rnography case.

I still remember my dad asking, “Isn’t that a friend of yours?”

The next day I ran into a mutual friend who gave me a few revolting details about the case.

And then it was like all of the weird stuff from over the years immediately summed up in my head and I realized just how messed up the guy really was.

– elevenghosts

3. “I wasn’t until I had kids that I realized…”

When I was growing up, my parents became involved with Amway/MLM. They had noble intentions (to get money to spend time with us) but it backfired. They were so involved with it that they were gone four nights of the week, and we never took a vacation without them voluntarily spending time at meetings.

It wasn’t until I had kids that I realized how much of my childhood they’d missed. I also became so used to fixing/solving things by myself before anyone noticed that it ties my insides up when someone offers to help.

– dammagedone

4. “Those weren’t uncles.”

Friends mom was a crack addict. Not entirely unusual in my neighborhood TBH.

He always had different uncles coming in and out of the house though i never saw him talk to any.

Hit me hard later on that those weren’t uncles and mom was funding her habit.

– Salty_Orchid

5. “I wanted to go to bed.”

A childhood friend that came to hang out when a mutual friend of ours visited after living out of state for a couple of years.

He showed up clearly on something which wasn’t really all that usual but he started straight making up stories about his dad working for the Irish mob and he just would not leave when it was 2am and I wanted to go to bed.

I ended up having to get our mutual to physically put him in my car and drive him home so we could get some sleep.

– handcraftedcandy

6. “They cut off all contact.”

Not me, but my older siblings.

One of their closest friends suddenly ended up in prison, which was very concerning. Turns out it was because he was sexually abusing his daughter.

They all cut off all contact with him after that.

– kryaklysmic

7. “You aren’t mature for your age.”

When I was in high school I was also in theatre. I was 15 when I joined. There were 2 guys, one my age who was really nice, and one 18 year old who I at the time thought was nice as well.

Most of his friends were 15 year old girls and he was making weird sexual comments. I was naive and thought he was great (he was a good actor).

When he started trying to get me alone though, and trying to flirt with me, I got creeped out and took my distance. He later started dating a 14 year old, and he later r*ped and abused her. I am lucky I realized he was weird on time.

To any young girl reading this, a grown man being interested in you at that age isn’t okay. You aren’t mature for your age, he is a predator. Please don’t get into a relationship with him.

– AngryMouse567

8. “It was like I’d died.”

When I left for BMT, my three closest friends from high school came by my house and went through all my boxes I had packed. Jewelry, books, video games, clothes- they took everything they wanted. What started out as 10 boxes turned into 2 mostly empty ones.

It was like I’d died, and they divided up my sh*t. The things that hit hardest were my hardcover set of Harry Potter (read them all my my sisters) and the jewelry set (earrings, necklace, tennis bracelet) that I’d gotten from my grandparents before my Papa (grandpa) passed away. They weren’t expensive pieces of jewelry, but they were my birthstone, and highly sentimental.

They blamed the whole thing on my sisters for a while, then I confirmed with all my siblings that they didn’t have anything to do with my stuff going missing. Haven’t spoken to those “friends” in over a decade now.

– i_just_read_a_lot

9. “He was free until his trial.”

When the local paper ran a story about them for being found guilty of possessing child p*rnography.

We went to high school together. This guy was good friends with my best friend at the time, she had a child in the age range that he had pictures of.

He’d actually been charged with the crime months before any of us found out about it because he was free until his trial (when the story was run).

– Snoo4071

10. “I trusted my gut.”

Ex BF. We had dated for two-ish years. He was really sweet, super motivated to be a firefighter, and overall a really nice guy. Super goofy.

I went to college and ended up breaking it off because something didn’t feel right. He was being more secretive, more reserved. I thought it was the distance, us growing apart, what have you.

A few years later my best friend sends me a pic of my Ex’s mugshot. He had been convicted on charges related to child p*rn.

I’m glad I trusted my gut.

– GirlScout-DropOut

11. “The police went to his place.”

My parents had a pretty close friend since I was a child that lived a block away from our house and would often have us over for dinner, spend holidays with us, that sort of thing. He was/is an obgyn.

About two years ago we found out through local news that he r*ped a girl in his home office, apparently he would practice abortions there (as it was illegal in my country at the time) and r*pe them while they were unconscious.

The police went to his place and found a bunch of guns there too.

– f1orencia

12. “He ghosted me.”

I found my best from high school on Facebook recently.

At first he was glad to hear from me. He is 60 and I figured out he still lives with his mom.

When I asked what he’d been up to the last 40 years, he ghosted me.

– Bobdavis235

13. “Yuck.”

Not my whole life but I became friends with a guy from my new job, we’d get a beer sometimes and I had him over for a barbecue a few times.

A few months later he got arrested for punching a girl and it became a pretty big local story.

In the process of being prosecuted a bunch of other girls (like about 10 or so) came forward saying he had threatened them. A girl he had dated briefly said he had given her some serious bruises while having sex. They also found a huge collection of upskirt photos an all the equipment he used to take them.

He had been expelled from high school for pulling up girls skirts.

Yuck.

– picksandchooses

14. “Currently trying to fix my life.”

At the end of last year I realized how many times my mom has meddled in my life when she thought I wasn’t going the way she thought it would.

Someone I was really interested in in my early twenties, she talked them out of ME while I wasn’t around. She was a really sweet person and I liked her a lot. Instead, I ended up with a psycho who left after our daughter was born.

That is just ONE instance out of many times my mother used intense manipulation on a person (usually me) to f*ck up my life because it wasn’t going the way she thought it should go. And she still has no idea she’s done anything wrong. Currently trying to fix my life from the last time she meddled in it. It’s not been good, but I’m almost through this mess.

– Meat_Sarcasm_Guy

15. “They stole a booster seat.”

They stole a booster seat from a restaurant and kept it as a trophy because they thought they didn’t get polite service.

No kids, plenty of money, educated; they just wanted to “hurt” the restaurant.

– crosleyxj

I know it’s far from the heaviest story, but I can’t get over that last one. Of all the Karens in all the world…

Do you have a tale like this?

Share it with us in the comments.

The post 15 Times People Turned From Totally Cool To Total Zeros appeared first on UberFacts.

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People Debate Whether It’s Better to Shower at Night or in the Morning

I know where I stand on this issue…

I’ve been a night showerer for as long as I can remember. I don’t understand how people can get into bed after a long day of work without showering…it just blows my mind.

What the hell is wrong with them?!?! Sorry if I offended you just there…I’m just very passionate about this subject.

But, on the flip side, I can see how folks need that morning blast to get them moving in the right direction.

Folks on AskReddit users talked about whether they think it’s better to shower in the morning or at night.

Let’s take a look.

1. Here, here!

“Getting into your bed to lay all over the sheets and soak in your sweat and oils from the day is gross.

You should be showering at the end of the day to get all the dirt and stuff off your body from being out and about.”

2. Boom!

“Morning showers? No time for that sh*t.

I’m up at 6:30 and out the door at 7.”

3. USA!

“Showering in the morning is a very American thing.

I’ve lived in a few other countries and the custom there was to was before going to bed.”

4. You might have a problem…

“It depends on if you drink.

If you have a six pack and crash, it doesn’t matter if you shower before bed.

You’re going to sweat that sh*t out at night, and will need to wash it off before work or whatever… so maybe shower twice?”

5. Something to think about…

“You sweat and secrete while you sleep, not just throughout the day, so you should probably shower in the morning too.”

6. You can do both!

“The morning one helps you wake up the one at night helps you get comfy and ready for bed.

Both are awesome.”

7. Morning person.

“I would say NOT showering in the morning is way worse than not showering at night, just because if I don’t I feel grimy all day.

I have pretty oily skin by default so I’m sure that has something to do with it, because some people don’t feel that way at all.”

8. Not a fan of the AM.

“I hate morning showers. Getting ready and making breakfast with wet hair is awful, plus it’s usually not dry before I have to leave.

I’m disturbing my hair as it dries by pulling clothes over it and I’m dripping water I’ll over the place.

Showers post-2pm only.”

9. Two good reasons.

“I do this at night time because I exercise later in the day and can’t wake up early.”

10. Mornings suck.

“I hate the morning and hate morning showers even more.

It’s cold, then your hairs wet making it colder and you’re still groggy. No thanks.

I take my showers at night, blow dry my hair afterwards. it’s so nice and relaxing to go to bed fresh and clean.”

11. Very particular.

“I’m very picky about what can go in/on my bed.

I don’t like people touching my bed, or dirty clothes from the day touching my bed, or anything that’s been outside touching my bed.

So I like to shower and be clean before I go to bed.

Totally agree with this!”

12. A different perspective.

“I’m in a bit of a different boat. Ideally, a few hours after cleaning up, just when the body has replenished a few of the natural oils, is the perfect time to crawl into bed.

This got me thinking though, I’m more of a bath person. Maybe just soaking in water dries me out more than a shower would.

If I hop into bed right after a bath, it seems to only exacerbate and extend that feeling of dryness, especially if they’re fresh sheets. I hate staying in hotels for this reason – always fresh sheets and very often not much time to lounge between bathing and getting into bed.”

13. Keep it fresh.

“Shower to wake up – wash body.

Shower after gym in the evening – deep wash and cleanse the hair.

Freshness is the bestness.”

What do you think?

It is better to shower in the morning or at night?

Spill your guts in the comments!

The post People Debate Whether It’s Better to Shower at Night or in the Morning appeared first on UberFacts.

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People Talk About the Statement, “Once Someone Agrees With You and Acknowledges Their Mistake, You Should Shut Up”

It’s time to zip your lip!

It sure can be exhausting going over and over the same issues with family members, significant others, bosses, co-workers, etc.

That’s why it’s always helpful when folks know when to shut a conversation down once and for all and to MOVE ON.

So, should you just shut your trap if someone agrees with you and admits their mistake?

AskReddit users weighed in…

Once someone agrees with you and acknowledges their mistake, that’s your cue to shut up. from unpopularopinion

Let’s take a look at what they said…

1. A time to rage.

“This one makes me rage sometimes. So there you are, having made some sort of mistake.

For hypotheticals lets pretend you forgot to put your mask on before going into Walmart. (This isn’t about masks dont make it about masks, just using an example).

“Sir you need to have a mask on.” (Acceptable)

“Why yes here it is, I’m so sorry I forgot. You’re right.” (Puts on mask)

We are officially done here.

“Well you see theres a pandemic going on…..” (wrong. The conversation is over)

“Yeah, you’re right I’m sorry man.” (Acknowledged twice now, problem corrected! We are done now.)

“When you dont have a mask on you can infect other people….” (why the f*ck are you still talking?)…”

2. Oh, I’m the *sshole?

“Then when you politely tell them that you get it and to stop bringing it up, you somehow turn into the *sshole of the situation.”

3. I got it!

“In situations like this I’ll typically just say “look dude, you’ve already made the sale.

Stop trying to sell me on it.””

4. All about power.

“I think it’s a power thing. They have gotten the apology but continue as they see an opening to exert authority under the guise of “being in the right”.

Usually people like that are just worth ignoring at that point. It’s not about sincerity just a power dynamic.”

5. You don’t always have to argue…

“It’s not even just about humiliation. Some people get so personally invested in arguments that they forget that you don’t always have to argue.

I was going out with this girl that was coming from a very manipulative environment and I had to articulate this to her to stop her from needlessly torturing herself on my behalf.

She’d bring up something that she assumed I might not like, I’d accept and she’d go on to explain herself regardless. “Take the yes” I’d remind her. First time I said it, I actually had to explain to her that what I meant. It just wasn’t ingrained in her that further deliberation is pointless once there’s nothing more to be gained from a conversation.

She was just conditioned to expect resentment over any decision and was offering justification unprompted. What an exhausting way to approach human interaction.”

6. Give them an “out”.

“It’s important to give people an “out.”

Like Sun Tzu said: “When you surround your enemy, leave an outlet free. Do not press a desperate foe too hard.”

It makes sense in warfare, so they are willing to flee instead of stand their ground. Likewise, If someone is trying to walk back bad behavior, or is apologetic, allow them that.

Don’t force them to defend themselves and get combative. Don’t punish good behavior.”

7. Here’s a trick to consider.

“I’ve discovered this new trick.

It’s absolutely amazing and I don’t know why it took me so long to discover. When people start talking about sh*t I don’t care about I just walk away. Right in the middle of their little spiel. I walk away from them.

It’s sooooo satisfying because who the hell just walks away while someone is speaking to them? Rude right? I don’t give a f*ck. There’s nothing they can do except follow you which most won’t do. And even when they follow me and keep talking I completely ignore them.

Its like they cease to exist in my reality altogether. You should try it out some time. It’s incredibly liberating.”

8. Good point.

“Some people who do this grew up in households where their feelings were never acknowledged or appreciated. Ever.

They never received a single second of validation from their parents, so they spend their entire lives fighting for validation from everyone else. And when they get it, they aren’t quite sure how to react to it, and they aren’t quite sure that the other person is actually validating their feelings.

I’m not saying this is your personal situation, I just jumped on this comment to provide some context for others to understand why some people may behave like this.”

9. It’s over!

“I can’t stand that.

I’ve apologized, why am I still being chewed out? Makes me go from apologetic to angry really fast.

Sorry, but that first sorry is now a f*ck you and you’re gonna get yelled at.”

10. We all make mistakes.

“I have no problem admitting I’ve made a mistake, I’m only human and I’m still learning.

What really f*cks me off is when people talk down to me thinking they’ve one upped me.

If it’s really that much of an achievement for you to be right, think about how rarely it happens.”

11. Ego boost.

“People who keep on going don’t really care about the message getting through, but about their ego getting a boost.

In the case of the facemask, it’s just a way to show they are part of “the good ones” and by going through the usual “there’s a pandemic…” spiel, they’re simply reaffirming their self-appointed role of Saviours.

Same goes for unsolicited lectures about politics, society, religion, dietary choices and basically ANY topic where soapboxing is a possibility.

Frankly, I can’t be arsed to point out people’s flaws and shortcomings, as it’d be a full-time job, a thankless and frustrating job for me and for them.”

12. Ugh.

“I moved house last summer and was moving the Bbq in my garden when I tripped, fell onto gravel with a Bbq on top of me and swore as I fell over (quite loudly tbf).

My neighbour, who I had not met before, popped her head over the fence. I assumed she was checking if I was okay as I was still on the floor and thought “what a lovely neighbour”. I was very wrong. The conversation went like this.

Neighbour: “You swore”

Me: “Sorry about that, I fell over.”

Neighbour: “I have a young child at home”

Me: “Right, sorry. I fell over and panicked, I won’t do it again”

Neighbour: “Upstairs have young children too, you shouldn’t swear”

Me (still on the floor and now bleeding): “Understood, sorry again”

Neighbour: “You’re voice is very loud”

Me: “Yep, sorry”

Neighbour: “Very booming”

Me: “right”

Neighbour: “have you just moved in?”

Me: “yeah last week” (now surely she’s going to give me a welcome to the neighborhood and ask if I’m okay)

Neighbour: “oh” turns and walks off.”

Okay, folks, now we want to hear from you.

In the comments, tell us what you think about this.

Please and thank you!

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