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20 Wedding Pros Share the Huge Red Flags That End Marriages

The question was simple: Marriage professionals, what are the red flags that prove a marriage won’t last?

Thousands of professionals chimed in, but these 20 are the best.

Enjoy the craziness that happens on people’s wedding day, most of which lead to divorce.

1. “…that’s a strong sign of an unbalanced relationship.”

Wedding videographer here. I don’t usually follow the marriage all that closely after the video is delivered, but usually you have a feeling as a neutral 3rd party about whether it’s going to last or not.

While I agree with most of the stuff mentioned here, I’ve found that the microcosm of how the couple feels about each other comes usually comes out during the cake cutting. If they’re drinking then they’ve usually had a few by that point and it’s a moment when everyone is watching you do something potentially awkward with your new SO. When I see a new bride or groom aggressively smush cake into the other’s face I usually feel like that’s a strong sign of an unbalanced relationship. Sometimes they’re both having fun with it and you can tell it’s cool, but most of the time you can tell that the person with cake on their face is either shocked or angry about it.

Again, I don’t have hard data to track results…but that’s the thing that usually informs my opinion about how it’s going to work out.

2. “I tried to play “I want to hear bride’s ideas” card…”

Ex wedding photographer here. There were only a couple situations where I had doubts about the couple’s future and one where I was certain.

I met the couple in a cafe to discuss their ideas and my services. The girl was very happy, she was very emotional and interested. The guy, however, was rolling his eyes and grunting at everything and I stop trying to get him involved in the conversation after he ignored me twice. It made the girl very uncomfortable and she was apologetic of his behavior. I don’t know what happened to them, as they apparently chose to reschedule their wedding and didn’t hire me in the end.

I declined shooting a wedding when the person who was going to hire me was the groom’s mom. When I asked her to arrange a meeting with the couple, she said that they didn’t want a wedding (meaning they wanted to elope), and it was her initiative to celebrate it. I tried to play “I want to hear bride’s ideas” card, but she told me the bride has no ideas, she obeys the groom, and the groom obeys mom. So I’ll only talk to the mom. So I declined, I hope the girl is fine – no one deserves a controlling MIL.

Finally, I was a guest and a photographer at my friend’s wedding. The bridesmaid was wearing a short white dress and she was chirping about her side hustle modeling for photos and catalogues, how “her boyfriend saw her in so many wedding dresses he won’t be surprised when she wears one to the wedding” and how “she caught 8 bouquets already, this will be her ninth”.

She talked a lot about wedding planning and stuff, but apparently there hadn’t even been a formal proposal and her boyfriend, who was a guest as well, looked very annoyed and clearly wished he were somewhere else.

Anyway, the bridesmaid started bugging me for photos of her and her boyfriend a week after the wedding, I told her several times that when I start editing the photos, I will do hers first, and by the time I sent her the photos, they were already broken up.

She started dating someone else a month later and got married the next year.

3. “the 8-month pregnant venue coordinator start carrying chairs…”

I used to work in day-of wedding coordination, and I remember 2 couples that I couldn’t wait to hear about the divorce.

When you pay a wedding coordinator, you only pay for the things the coordinator orders/plans (flowers, catering, DJ) + coordinator fees. Anything else couples buy (dresses, gifts, suits, etc) are added. We estimated this to be a $500,000 wedding, easy. Dad paying for all of it.

The bride was a total sweetheart when I met her. The groom seemed quiet, but was very easy going. Always nice to have a sober groom, and he didn’t drink a drop during the day. Then the photographer/videographer left to take some venue shots.

The bride began berating everyone, myself included, on how her perfect day had to be capped out because no one wanted to give her more. My clothes were trashy, the DJ’s computer was a PC, the bar staff we’re wearing red vests and she hates vests. Photographer came back and she was an angel again.

The second was a wedding of a general and pediatric surgeon in the local hospital. Paid for their own beautiful and in-their-means wedding. The bride was seriously amazing. But, there was a mixup day if the wedding. The 200 chairs that we’re supposed to be moved to the 3rd story of the historic building weren’t taken upstairs.

So my boss, the other assistant, and the 8 month pregnant venue coordinator start carrying chairs upstairs. 3 flights.

It wasn’t great.

After the wedding, we had to do it again, but down. The father of the groom started helping us. We begged him to enjoy his son’s day, but he responded that if it were his daughter doing this, he’d be furious. Groom comes by and tells his dad to stop helping the pregnant woman stack chairs.

He looks at the monster that is his son and asked how he’d feel if it was his wife or sister who had to do this. Groom told his dad that maybe if we had applied ourselves a little more, we wouldn’t have been taking out the trash at a successful couples wedding.

Clearly he didn’t know how much his wife was paying us.

4.

I was a wedding photographer for many years in the 00’s.

It was pretty easy to tell which couples were going to last and which ones would soon be divorced.

The main behavior differentiating the two was whether they were on the same team, helping each other and lifting each other up in the face of the inevitable problems and stress that come with weddings. Good couples tackle problems together. Bad couples take sides and fight/blame each other when something goes wrong.

5.

Wedding Planner here: Red Flags – nerves are normal but when one of the pair start doubting whether they should go through with it waaay before the day, you know something isn’t quite right. Green Flags – they make decisions together and have each other’s backs especially when family can be pressuring.

6. “loved poker, craft beer, cigars, hanging with his rowdy friends, video games…”

Wedding videographer here: I try to get to know both people beforehand, so I can work in their hobbies/unique traits into my product. A big red flag is when one person is clearly trying to change the other.

I had one dude who loved poker, craft beer, cigars, hanging with his rowdy friends, video games, etc. I planned a cool shoot where I had all his friends in an old west saloon, and he sees his bride to be, etc… but she steps in and declares “oh, he won’t be doing any of those things any more.”

Poor bastard just sat there in silence as I awkwardly had to plan them shopping for a Yorkie puppy instead. Half way through post production after the wedding, he called and said he was getting an annulment. I wanted to say “could have told ya so!” But I try to stay neutral.

Green flags are just the opposite. Embracing the other person’s habbits/hobbies/interests, basically not being a controlling freakshow.

7. “They got divorced about a year later.”

Ex wedding photographer.

Typically I saw red flags when the bride or groom is super quiet. I mean silent and just watching.

One instance was a groom who barely said ten words to anyone during the ceremony or reception afterwards. The bride and her mother were extremely loud and excited the entire time. The bride needed everything to be “perfect”. I dropped off the photo bundle with them two weeks later and he was still quiet. She however complained about all of the pictures because the groom wasn’t “smiling enough”. She wanted a discount because I couldn’t make him look happy enough.

They got divorced about a year later. I know because I did his engagement photos with his new fiancée about four years after his first wedding. His engagement photos showed him much happier.

Edit: I stopped doing weddings but I do some portraits and mostly commercial and product work.

He called me for a wedding quote but I had stopped doing them at that point. I do still do portraits so I offered to do engagement photos for him that he was happy with.

8. “We did not get a 5-star review.”

Wedding band guitar player here.

Drunken gorilla-sized groom physically attacked us when we cut off the music after already going over our contracted time an hour. Mother of the groom got into the mix and pulled him back. Bride was in tears. Best man pulled out a Bluetooth speaker and kept the party going. We did not get a 5 star review.

So that was a red flag.

They lasted a few months.

9. “She was in a mickey mouse t-shirt at that time…”

I am/was a wedding photographer: I think you can kind of tell if they are going to stay together forever based on how they handle all the little (and sometimes even big) problems a wedding day can bring.

There was one couple’s story I love to tell. They are not your typical bride and groom, they had their wedding in a forest where you could also go climbing (sorry don’t know what they are called) with a big wooden house and fireplace in front. All vegan food and a lot of friends with lots of dogs. Everything was perfect, except the special dress the bride had have made and painted didn’t arrive in time for the ceremony and she was devastated.

She was in her sweatpants and a mickey mouse tshirt at that time and her soon-to-be-husband took off his suit, put on a big white shirt, stood there in his boxer shorts and just said “well, we have to go” (cause the ceremony-person had to leave an hour later) and she just laughed and went with it. I was in shock but other than it being strange to have hairy man-legs in my wedding photos, taking the pictures was really fun and they were totally relaxed. I’m pretty sure they will be doing well.

10. “He was absolutely heartbroken.”

And I have to tell this one too…I didn’t need a sixth sense when I heard that on their honeymoon, the bride cheated on the groom, so the grooms parents didn’t want the photos OR the video I had shot. Instead they wanted me to sue her for the remainder of the money they owed me. I told them I was sorry but they signed the contract so they had to pay.

The bride was a total bitch to him all day at the wedding. It was no surprise she did this. He was absolutely heartbroken.

And yes, they sent me a check for the remainder, and I still have all the photos, developed and collecting dust in a pile still in the lab bag I brought them home in. This was in 2003, and I can’t bring myself to throw them away.

The best part? The groom called me two years later to do his wedding photos and video because he was getting married again. I was all set to do it, and then the new fiancé pulled the plug. Turns out she didn’t want any memories of the first wedding being involved. So I was fired as soon as I was hired.

11. “Everyone is drinking. Knocking back shots.”

I am a videographer. Most weddings we video are fairly smooth. Couple is happy. Family cries tears of joy. Lots of laughter. That bit. We did film one wedding that seemed fine right up until the aisle walk.

We video the bride and groom prep. They have two suites—one for the ladies and one for the gentlemen. My partner and I were having an easy time running back and forth. Everyone is drinking. Not light beer either. I mean knocking back shots. Empty bottles everywhere. Offering us rounds too as they go by. Everyone is pretty carefree, upbeat, and ready to party, the bride and groom most of all. This is going to be the easiest wedding we film. Or so we thought.

Now everyone is seated in the ceremony hall. Groom and all his men are up front with the officiant. Bride’s Maids start walking down the aisle. All beautiful. The bride walks in with her father. At this point I’m filming the groom and his reaction. We get a wide shot because we can always zoom in during post. My partner is recording the groom and her father. I see the best man in my viewfinder pull out a flask from his jacket pocket—the rest of the men do the same except Groom.

So this is clearly planned.

The best man speaks loud enough over the music so people turn to him away from the Bride. He raises his glass high and shouts “Here’s to Bride Name, here’s to Groom Name; may you never disagree. But if you do…” He points at the bride with his flask hand and finishes “FUCK YOU, here’s to Groom Name.”

They all drink to their frat boy toast. The best man hands the Groom his flask and he drinks it laughing!!

I have never watched a video more than I have the reaction of the Bride and her father. Jaw dropped speechless. The ceremony went on. And it’s not done. The officiant asks the Bride “do you take Groom yadda yadda…” and she surprisingly, yet weakly, says yes. The officiant asks the same of the Groom and instead of just saying yes, he screams “Fuck da fuck yeah I do!!” Bride just face palms herself in embarrassment.

The look of disgust on her whole family’s face the entire night after that was priceless and highly awkward to film. I could go on with more stories about this wedding, but this just about the bride and groom. Needless to say I think that’s a big red flag.

TL;DR Best man raises his flask as Bride is walking down the aisle and says “here’s to Bride, here’s to Groom, may you never disagree, but if you do, fuck you *pointing at bride* heres to Groom.” All groom’s men drink from flasks including the Groom.

12. “…smashed the cake…”

Photographer here.

I swear that all of the couples that have split up have smashed the cake in their SOs face. None of the nice cake couples have. Just my weird anecdotal experience.

Maybe it’s a sign of respect for each other.

13. “what he wrote was not exactly Shakespeare…”

Former wedding videographer. When doing the letter read the bride at the end said which I quote “well that was fucking stupid”.

I cut that part out in the final video.

Let me clarify what im referring to. The couple reads their letter from their partner prior to the wedding. She just got done reading the grooms letter and was talking about what he wrote.

To be fair, what he wrote was not exactly Shakespeare but still a harsh response.

14. “Our team can hear them yelling at each other half a mile away…”

Wedding videographer here.

Had a couple fly us out to Iceland for their engagement shoot. Now the first couple of days were fine and everything looked okay, but in Iceland, some lodging options aren’t very luxurious. The groom chose to book what was essentially a tiny bunk house (the ones meant for those summer camps) and the bride lost it and complained the whole night.

Next morning things are pretty tense and our team continues the shoot as planned even though it is incredibly awkward. Most of our plans fall through because they start arguing.

In front of a beautiful, solitary glacier.

For two hours.

Our team can hear them yelling at each other half a mile away because there is literally no one else around for miles.

We finish up whatever we could of the last day of the shoot and awkwardly said our goodbyes.

Later on I learn that they broke up a month before the wedding.

15. “…look past his soon to be wife and wink at me…”

Red flag: The groom winking at both my assistant and I during the ceremony.

He was not winking in the sense that he might have been tearing up or had something in his eye but there was a part in the ceremony where the couple sat down and he would lean his head back in his chair look past his soon to be wife and wink at me or look over his left shoulder and wink at my assistant.

It was bizarre.

16. “…biggest sign is the cake cutting.”

Photographer here: to me the biggest sign is the cake cutting. Some people like to smear the cake everywhere as a joke, some people don’t. Usually the couple is in sync about this. They know what the other would like and they don’t smush cake on the others face if they wouldn’t want that.

Sometimes one of them (usually the groom) will force cake all over the others face and embarrass and upset them. I’ve seen this happen a handful of times and all of those relationships that I have kept up with have ended in a divorce.

17. “I think that’s a good indicator…”

Photographer here.

You can tell somewhat based on how the couple treats each other on the wedding day.

If they are respectful toward one another (and toward me) during a day full of stress then I think that’s a good indicator of being able to deal with other problems that may arise during a marriage.

18. “Dad did it anyway, mom smacked him across the face…”

Not a wedding photographer, but my parent’s wedding video is a tell-all story.

At the cake cutting, my mom had specifically asked my dad not to put cake on her face (which is usually a tradition).

Dad did it anyway, mom smacked him across the face, dad said “fuck this” and stormed out of the reception.

They had a twenty year rocky marriage of lies and infidelity, and are finally officially divorced.

They are much better off now. The cake cutting really seems to be a good rule of thumb for a relationship.

19. “Then we had to photoshop a smile onto the groom…”

My husband and I are wedding photographers. We’ve been pretty lucky so far and haven’t had too many crazies. We have stayed friends with a few of the couples and see them regularly.

The one couple we hope we never see again fought the entire wedding day. The couple barely looked at each other, it was so bad. Then we had to photoshop a smile onto the groom a couple of times so he at least looked happy in the ceremony of all things. To describe what he looked like, I would compare him to a Polish meat butcher with transitions lensed glasses. Totally brutal. I have no idea if they are together still but I would say not.

20. “She wanted a cake like a castle…”

Cake artist here. I had a couple come in for a tasting. Appointment was for 7 PM, but he was late. First half hour was just her. She told me they met at a stable where they both kept their horses. Those horses were going to be featured at the wedding as the bride and groom would ride them to the site (a beautiful farm venue.)

She described in detail her self-designed medieval gown, flower wreath in her hair, embroidered shoes like some from a museum: sounded lovely. She wanted a cake like a castle, which was a specialty of mine. The whole wedding would be over the top, but not in a cringey way.

Then he arrives. Barely says Hi to her, sits down and starts telling me about his wedding. He’ll ride in dressed as a riverboat gambler with a frock coat, brocade vest, string tie, big hat, gold pocket watch, and STERLING SILVER SPURS! He’s fine with the castle cake, but wants to incorporate the watch and a pair of mother of pearl handled pistols (picture given).

I had already decided that I was not going to work with them. NO way could I come up with a cake that would work for them. But they were there so I brought out the samples. For the next hour they carried on two entirely separate monologues. They didn’t address each other (or me) and they didn’t listen to each other (or me).

I made no attempt to book them that night, and when they called later in the week I told them their date had been taken. They were living in 2 incompatible and entirely self contained fantasies. I doubt they even made it to the wedding day.

Honestly, it’s good most of these people figured out quickly that they weren’t right for each other.

Do you really want to spend your life with somebody you don’t like?

No. No you don’t.

The post 20 Wedding Pros Share the Huge Red Flags That End Marriages appeared first on UberFacts.

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14 Employees Who Should Have Definitely Gotten Fired But Miraculously Didn’t

Somebody on Reddit asked this question: “What is the biggest “oh fuck, I’m dead” thing you’ve done at work, but nobody ever found out?”

Thousands answered, and we combed through the best to share them with you.

1. “I was essentially trapped at work…”

Had a truck turn up 15 minutes before the end of the day and in my rush/pure fucking anger to just get him unloaded ASAP so I could go home I drove through the roller shutter doors as they were still opening and “caught” them with the top of the mast.

I got the guy unloaded and on his way and tried to lock up hoping to explain it all away the following day.

The door was that bent it wouldn’t lock, as it wouldn’t lock I couldn’t set the alarms, I was essentially trapped at work and now an hour late from leaving.

In a moment of pure desperation I lifted the doors again and drove into them from the other side bending them enough to lock them up, set the alarms and get home.

I’d hit them a little too hard so they were now bent inwards and the bosses assumed someone had reversed into them during the night – the estate we were on was a notorious cruising spot for the local boy racers and there was always tyre marks or bits of car scattered round the place so they got the blame

2. “…the only way to activate a multi-million dollar security technology system.”

Lost a key dongle that was worth $32k.

This was 15ish years ago in a different state and career. The dongle looked basically like a USB thumb drive was was the only way to activate a multi-million dollar security technology system for a hospital in a big city.

The thing is, I was 100% sure I never had it and that it was missing from the packaging from the manufacture. Everyone I worked with also was not sure they ever saw it too. I was distraught and sick to my stomach at the possibility I screwed up somehow on something so stupid and cost costly but ended up being convinced we never received it.

The owner of the company I worked for and our lawyers had to get involved with the vendor to make an agreement with them to send us a replacement for a relatively small fee. I’m not positive after all these years on this cost but think it was around $5k.

No one was happy but we needed it and it was done.

Fast forward to years later. I’m living in a different state, now married and working for a different company in a different field and I decide I want to use the backpack I used to use at the old job where the dongle was lost. I still had some stuff in it so I clean it out, turn it upside down and shake it and hear something rattling around.

In the bottom of the big compartment of the bag, it looks like a solid piece. I dig my fingers around it and was surprised to find it was a flap. I open the flap and HOLY SHIT its the mother f’ing missing $32k dongle!

I was shocked and for a second, felt so damn guilty. But then I just laughed as it was already taken care of and years in the past. Still feel like a shithead thinking about it all these years later just a little bit.

3. “I left Gwar, Meat Sandwich, as our only muzak…”

Gwar.

Our muzak hold crap system was out of whack, so since I’m IT, I was tasked to fix it. Stupid proprietary audio files, stupid codecs, stupid hold music.

To pass the time, I ripped a gwar cd that I recieved as a gag gift a million years ago to the proprietary format and amused myself by throwing “Meat Sandwich” on loop for testing.

Finally got everything working, called it a night and went home for the rest of the weekend.

Monday morning, around 11am, I get a call. “Hi, Coyote? I think our muzak system is still broken. People are complaining about the songs and the sound?”

What? WHAT? Call my work into question? I tested it MYSELF. I personally made sure the audio format was working with my OWN MUSIC and…

…and…

….and fuck.

I left Gwar, Meat Sandwich, as our only muzak for hold for our entire company.

I ran to the Datacenter, put everything back to default and the told them that it was “crossing channels” or some bullshit and everything was fine.

But we open at 6am. So for 5 glorious hours, Meat Sandwich was the music playing after the soft voiced woman told you to “Please Hold”.

4. “It was made out of diamonds or gold or something else fucked up.”

It was university.

They had this really expensive piece of equipment and I can’t remember exactly what it measured, or how it worked.

What I remember is this: you completed a “circuit” to power the thing, meaning you plugged a wire into 5volts or whatever came out of the wall, and another wire into the ground, and plugged both of them into the device (alligator clips baby).

What you got out of the wall was wayyyyyyyy too much current, so you had to put a resister between the wire from the wall and the device

The thing cost something ridiculous like 25k at the time. It was made out of diamonds or gold or something else fucked up.

Anyways, I got really pissed at my lab partner, just took over the experiment. And plugged the thing directly into the wall without a resister…

I basically fried the thing in a second.

I smelt burning and could see smoke come out of it immediately and knew exactly what I’d done.

As I literally thought “Oh fuck, I’m dead” and started realizing the gravity of my actions, this dude in a huge ass trench coat thing walks by my lab table, gets his coat caught in it and pulls the thing off the table. It lands on the ground and smashes into a million pieces.

Dude was walking with the guy who ran the labs, and that dude loses it on him.

I just sat in silence. I felt guilty but like I dodged the biggest bullet of my life.

I didn’t know definitively that I’d broke it, but I knew definitively that that dude had.

And I was too much of a coward to say anything.

5. “…my hot acid puke punched right through the bag and into my lap.”

It was the night before I was scheduled to have a tense meeting with my boss and a client. The meeting was supposed to be a sort of “peace talk” because of tension growing between my staff and the client who was an emotional and difficult person to work with. The night before my wife and I opened a bottle of wine with dinner and managed to finish it off before bed. This didn’t seem like too much at the time but the next morning I woke up sicker than I have ever been.

I still had this difficult meeting so I got up got dressed managed to choke down some Advil and a glass of water. The minute I get on the highway to work I feel my stomach twisting. There is nothing between where I am now and where my office is except highway with almost no shoulder.

Half way to work I feel that feeling in my throat, like a tightening, and my bowels are starting to make terrible noises. I realize I am going to throw up and look around my car for anything to throw up in. I spot McDonalds bag is on the floor so I grab it.

Hoping I don’t need to use it I speed up trying to get to my exit so I can pull over and ralph.

No dice.

I held the bag up to my mouth going 85 MPH and throw up red wine into the McDonalds bag which had the strength of tissue paper because my hot acid puke punched right through the bag and into my lap.

By some miracle I had extra business slacks in my car. I stopped at a gas station and changed in the bathroom. I looked into the mirror and a haggard sallow man with flop sweat and sunken eyes stared back at me. Even with the wardrobe change I smelled faintly of booze and vomit. I went to the meeting and my boss noticed something was up. He rescheduled with the client telling me “I don’t think you’re up to it this morning”.

I for sure thought he was going to fire me for being a huge drunk but nothing happened.

I don’t drink wine anymore.

6. “Went home. Ate pizza. Couple hours go by.”

I was to supposed to meet a client outside of work to discuss a business opportunity.

Got permission to leave work early to go to an arranged meeting with the customer. I went on auto-pilot as soon as I started driving from work. Forgot about the meeting. Picked up a pizza. Went home. Ate pizza. Couple hours go by.

OH SHIT!

I didn’t have a phone number for the customer, so I never called or anything, just no-call no-showed on the customer.

Customer never said anything. Manager never asked about it.

7. “My life flashes before my eyes.”

Okay so I’m running a summer camp and half way through the day I’m comparing our bus attendance to the group attendance and I notice there is a little girl who was marked as being on the bus but not in her group. I go and check the group, no sign of her.

Other groups, nope.

No one has seen this six year old girl and we are out in bumble fuck nowhere and I am losing my shit. I have lost a child. We’re gonna get so fired and gonna need to call the cops and they’re gonna have to search the woods.

My life flashes before my eyes.

After fifteen minutes of oh my god my life is over my coworker pulls up with the news that she spoke to the girls mom and she did not come to camp that day at all, the bus attendance was an error. I was five minutes from calling my boss and instead I collapsed in the dirt with relief and tried not to cry.

Holy fuck.

8. “….we only have one kid.”

Summer martial arts camp, probably 10+ years ago. Several times a day, the entire camp would be called to line up on the gymnasium floor. Roughly 50-75 kids, probably in rows of 8, spaces with about 5 feet between each kid, all nice and orderly.

For the most part, everybody knew exactly where and which spot to line up on. It was pretty meticulous laid out, and we would spend 20 or 30 minutes on the very first day, making sure each and every person knew specifically which spot to line up on.

One day, lineup is called for lunch or something. Whistle blows, mob of kids come crashing from all around. Kids take their spots, settle in, counselors are talking, telling them what’s for lunch, somebody is probably walking through the rows of kids with a giant bottle of hand sanitizer spritzing each pair of outstretched hands. Suddenly somebody noticed an empty spot. They turned to the next kid over who was quite young (probably 7 ish) and asked who stands there. “Oh, that’s my brother”. “Well where is he??” “I dunno..”.

So they proceed to tear the whole place apart.

Swimming pool???!? Check. Bathrooms? Check. Girls bunk? Check. Kitchen? Check. Showers? Check.

You name it, they searched there, twice. Finally they have to call the parents and tell them that they LOST one of their kids.

How do the parents respond?

“….we only have one kid.”

Oh yeah, kid forgot to mention that his brother was IMAGINARY.

9. “…20 minutes later walking in the back to ankle deep water.”

I used to work for a big box pet store taking care of the animals that lived in the store. There was a rotation of the animals getting their accessories changed out and cleaned (i.e. water bottles, food bowls, plastic huts) every day. So each day the morning person cleaned that day’s habitats and the closer did the “dishes” in the sink and set them to dry and be put back in rotation for use.

It was sometimes difficult to complete any of these tasks while also dealing with customers. The sink we did dishes in was very deep and company policy stated that the dishes had to soak in a cleaning solution for a certain amount of time so it took a long time to fill up the sink with the solution to soak everything.

It was common to turn the water on to fill up the sink and go see if anyone needed help in the store while you waited.

Not long after I started working there I was performing this task and got pulled into a long conversation with a customer. Normally I’d duck in the back and turn off the faucet if I thought the conversation would take a while, but this night I just completely forgot the sink was on. Cue like 20 minutes later walking in the back to ankle deep water. The sink had overflowed and was filling the back space. The door had a rubber stopper at the bottom keeping it from going into the store

I took a squeegee thing and started herding the water into a drain on the floor on the back side of the fish wall but it took a long time. I was so frantic and still had to pay attention to customers out on the floor. Luckily no one else ever went into the back unless you worked in that department and I was working alone. So I managed to herd most of the water into the fish drain and the rest dried over night before the opener came in. No one ever knew I flooded the back space.

Few months later I realized flooding was a common occurrence and my manager flooded it at least once a year.

10. “We call it the doom button…”

I auto-archived 2500 records from our database with one button push. This removed them from active status and cancelled any associated reservations and services.

I had to click into each record and reinstate it. Took me 6 hours.

I admitted my folly at the next team meeting to ensure no one else had to go through the sheer butt puckering terror I did when those records disappeared. We call it the doom button now. Why there is a doom button I have no idea.

11. “…forklift tine and punched it all the way through her tailgate!!!”

When I was 18 I worked for Menards (like Home Depot). It was a small store with an outside yard that you couldn’t drive into so we would pick what you wanted with a forklift and load the customers out in the parking lot.

So this lady came in to pick up a bunch of special order bricks. I loaded two pallets of bricks into the back of her very nice new truck, she signed the paperwork and the transaction was done…. Until I sat in the forklift filling out my part of the paperwork and she backed into a forklift tine and punched it all the way through her tailgate!!!

I was 100% in the wrong as anyone who has ever driven a forklift knows that unless you are actively using the lift, you keep the tines on the ground if you’re parked, and a couple inches above while driving.

I had seen a guy get fired once for driving over a piece of cardboard instead of stopping to pick it up, so I was beyond screwed… but she just put it in drive and took off. She didn’t even look back at me. I expected that she was going to pull up to the front of the store to report it, but she just left. As far as I know she never reported it, and no one ever knew it happened.

That was 21 years ago and I think about that incident pretty often.

12. “…the captain made a wrong turn onto a narrow taxiway…”

When I was a brand new airline pilot we landed at an airport that required a long taxi back to the terminal. During the taxi the captain made a wrong turn onto a narrow taxiway that led to a small private hangar. As soon as he made the turn we knew it was the wrong taxiway, but it was very narrow with trees on both sides so there was no way to turn around. I had no idea how we were going to deal with this.

He thought for a minute, then said, “McGonogle, can you see the tower from here?”

I looked. “Nope.”

“Good. Then they can’t see us.”

With that, he reversed both engines and slowly backed onto the main taxiway. I guess the passengers thought it was normal because no one asked any questions and we never heard anything about it.

13. “…paperclip flew right over the small wall and hit a customer right in the head…”

when I was about 17 I used to internship at a bank through a school program. It was a small business bank so there wasn’t any glass like you see at big banks. The set up was 4 desks lined up next to each other with small walls separating them almost cubicle style but shorter. My desk was all the way at the end next to the wall.

Anyways, so I’m sitting at my desk bored one day with nothing to do so I grab a paperclip and start flicking it paper football style at the wall separating my desk and the one next to it. Ever ytime it bounced back I would flick it again.

Well one time I flicked it a little too hard and the paperclip flew right over the small wall and hit a customer right in the head that was waiting to be attended.

My heart sank and so did my head down to the desk as I tried to go unnoticed in hopes that they wouldnt know who did it. Looking back it was probably obvious that the 16 y/o boy was the one flicking paperclips and not the 40+ old ladies next to him.

Luckily I don’t think the customer knew what hit her and I was never blamed for it.

14. “I never had to fess up to my boss…

Working at a high end tour company, I backed a bus hitch into a guest’s BMW. Broke one of their tail lamps.

I picked up all the plastic remnants from the ground and taped a note to their window to find me when they returned from their tour to discuss the damage and go speak to the owner with me about insurance, etc.

I’d been breaking down my trip to make way for the next bus arriving, so I hadn’t had a chance to go tell my boss before they returned. The guest came and found me, laughing. Said someone had hit it a few weeks prior and it was already being processed through the insurance of the other person who had hit him, and not to worry about it.

He hadn’t realized that I’d done additional damage because it was the same tail light, nothing else was damaged and I’d picked up all the broken pieces from the ground, so it didn’t look that bad compared to what damage had already existed.

I never had to fess up to my boss about the incident and learned to never attempt to park the bus near the fancy cars again.

Wow!

The post 14 Employees Who Should Have Definitely Gotten Fired But Miraculously Didn’t appeared first on UberFacts.

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15 People Whose Brutal Honesty Lost them a Job Opportunity

We’ve all had to do it… the dreaded job interview.

“Is my resume right?”
“Am I over dressed?”
“What kind of insane questions are they going to ask me?”

We can all get stressed AF worrying about whether or not we’re going to do well, but what if you didn’t care?

The following 15 people share their shockingly honest stories about how they said what was exactly on their mind, which was definitely too much for these companies to handle.

1. “Thank you but you’re nothing special…”

“I’m in tech sales and this happened a few years ago.

In an interview with a VP of Sales, I was asked what to do if the product I was selling only fit half of the buyer’s requirements checklist.

I said I would recommend the prospect evaluate other products to see whether a better fit was available, rather than push them to purchase something they would be dissatisfied with.

They would figure out they had the wrong product sooner or later, and the support and follow-up required to remedy the problem would end up costing the company more.

He replied, ‘Thank you but you’re nothing special,’ and walked out of the room.

I was shocked and sat there for about 10 minutes. No one came back so I ended up walking myself out.”

2. “It didn’t go down well.”

“This one didn’t end up costing me the job offer as such, but it would’ve cost me the job offer from the person who was interviewing me:

Interviewer: ‘Can you tell me about a time when you demonstrated leadership skills?’

Me: ‘Do you really want me to? Because I can do that if you like and give you some story and blah blah blah, but it seems like you’re kinda just asking that because you think that’s what you’re supposed to ask in an interview, rather than because you actually care? So we could talk about more interesting stuff if you’d rather do that.’

This was from one of the many interviews I went through during my internship at Lehman Brothers.

I said it partly because I was absolutely sick to death of answering stupid interview questions from people who didn’t care what my answers were and partly because I genuinely wanted to know what the other person was actually thinking and partly because I wanted to see what happened.

I wasn’t intending it to sound aggressive or non-cooperative, though obviously I was aware that was a risk.

My hope was that we’d actually be able to have a proper constructive conversation as a result. As an interviewer, I’d love to have someone respond that way, though I wouldn’t ask that question because frankly I’d rather smack my head against the desk for 15 minutes than sit through an interviewee giving me canned answers they’d rehearsed over and over again.

It didn’t go down well.

I don’t know for sure what the feedback was from that interviewer, because I had multiple interviews that day, and everyone had to give some feedback. That was then filtered through HR and I was given general feedback and a couple of quotes. However, every other interview that day went well, so I’m pretty confident that the ‘he did not seem well-prepared’ came from that interviewer.

So it goes. I’m glad I gave it a try, and with all the other positive stuff that was going on that summer I could afford to blow it with that one particular trading desk.”

3. “Teach me something in 60 seconds that I don’t already know.”

“I was interviewing for a plant manager’s job, all my experience and skills sets boxes were checked, so to speak.

The interview was going well. The HR manager walks in to the middle of the interview and informs me that she will be joining the discussion to make this a team interview.

She starts asking bizarre questions. Like, ‘Teach me something in 60 seconds that I don’t already know.’ OK, off the beaten path of questions but I teach her how a man can carry his wallet to make it harder to be pick-pocketed.

She’s a woman and she would obviously not know that type of stuff. Her questions are really off. The original interviewer finishes and he asks if I have any questions for them. Of course I do, so I respond yes. He then tells me to be careful as there is only one question that is acceptable. I ask him if he has any concerns about my ability to perform well in the position we are discussing.

He tells me close, I should have asked him what is preventing them from offering me the job right now. I then tell them that I have other questions, they look puzzled but proceed to answer my questions.

I then get to a question about how on their website had talked about their valuing military veterans. I mention the plant manager by name who was quoted on their website.
The HR manager looks at me and explains that they are not sure where I got that information from and that that plant manger was 5 plant managers ago.

In my head, I’m thinking that was only a 2-year-old quote. So I asked why have the previous plant managers failed. She responds because they didn’t listen. I replied back, you have gone through five plant managers in less than three years and you think they are the problem? The recruiter later told me they wanted to hire me up till the end when I questioned their decision making skills.

Glad I changed their mind.”

4. “crawling from 10%, to 20%”

“I was interviewing with Apple for a marketing position.

One of the interviewers was the product manager for the Safari browser.

I pointed out that one reason that I preferred Chrome over Safari was because Safari’s progress bar in the URL box made page loads seem slower than they really were, if you saw the bar crawling from 10%, to 20%, and so on, it had a negative psychological effect because it caused you to think about how much more time it was going to take for the page to load.

I’m not sure if that was the answer that prevented me from advancing, but it sure was a mistake.”

5. “Um, why are you here?”

“I was interviewed for a job with the title ‘communications executive.’ I didn’t get past the first question.

Interviewer: ‘Tell me why you want to work in sales.’

Me: ‘I don’t.’

Interviewer:’Um, why are you here?’

Me: ‘The job title doesn’t mention sales, nor did the ad. Your office wouldn’t give me any further details when I phoned, so it never crossed my mind this was a sales job.’

Interviewer: ‘It is . . . There’s probably not much more to talk about.’

Me: ‘I doubt it.’

Interviewer: ‘Did it take you long to get here?’

Me: ‘About an hour.

I was allowing plenty of time because I didn’t want to be late.’

Interviewer: ‘Um, sorry.’”

6. “They did not seem amused and I was not impressed with their attempts at answers.”

“Several years ago, I had submitted my resume to multiple companies. A couple of major companies had jumped on it and went through their hiring process very efficiently, quickly reaching the point of preparing offers.

Suddenly, a Google recruiter calls me up; it had taken them literally a month or so from submission.

After that initial phone screen, they invited me to an on-site interview. I said, ‘Sure,’ thinking that at least it’d be fun to see what the company looks like from the inside.

The on-site interviews were frankly rather underwhelming considering the scary stories you see all over the web.

In the end, I had opportunity to ask a few questions.

Since I wasn’t all that enthusiastic about Google at this point, I asked something along the lines of, ‘Looking from the outside, your product selection process looks like throwing a bunch of cheese balls into the wall to see what sticks.

Besides the ads, do any of your other products actually make any money?’ They did not seem amused and I was not impressed with their attempts at answers.

A few weeks later, the Google recruiter calls to tell me that they won’t be moving forward.

She seemed genuinely surprised when I did not appear heartbroken; I guess she thought everyone desperately wants to work for Google. I did not really give a hoot anyway since I had already chosen between three other opportunities.”

7. “I think you can sense my level of interest in this position.”

“I saw an opportunity at a small agency which had recently been acquired by a large tech company. My primary goal was to sell them contracted service for specialized training. But the position they were offering intrigued me.

It was a convenient commute, the benefits at this large company were excellent, and the position had just the right amount of balance of what I’d be extremely proficient at, and what I’d be challenged by. But here’s the thing – I’ve been freelance for so long that the thought of a 9–5 (or more) job wasn’t particularly appealing. Being over 50 and freelance means you can and do take a nap whenever you want.

This particular corporate culture required a full-time commitment and it appeared there was little opportunity for flex-time or remote work. In other words, I really didn’t want to work that much. Employers don’t usually pursue candidates with that kind of attitude. Anyway, I made 2 mistakes during the phone interview, I admitted my freelance hourly rate, and admitted my half-hearted interest in the job.

And my tone was nothing but pure, unfiltered honesty. Again, my primary purpose was to sell some contracted training to the particular team with the open position.

I was successful in learning about the team, and identifying the right, qualified decision-maker. I was upfront about my goal, and when the interviewer asked whether my interest was the position or the contracted work, I answered ‘either/or.’ But the interviewer immediately classified me as over-qualified me when she heard my hourly rate.

Interviewer: ‘Oh, this is a production-level job, you wouldn’t be happy with the compensation.’

Me: ‘I don’t want to oversell myself, I think you can understand that as a freelancer I certainly don’t do 40 billable hours a week at that rate. The salary range is fine, and a production-level job is what I’d be highly proficient at, my skills and experience in the system and platform you’re adopting make me a perfect fit at that level.’

Int: ‘And you understand this is a full-time, on-site position?’

Me: ‘I understand, but is there any flexibility in schedule or remote work?’

Int: ‘No. But…’ [she rattles off the okay-sounding holiday and vacation day policies].

[Awkward pause]

Let me interject that pausing during phone negotiations is an effective tactic in sales. Whoever feels uncomfortable enough to speak first is often the one that breaks down and either reveals something or submits to the other one.

Trouble is, this wasn’t just some bored HR person working through a pile of resumes, this was a high level recruiter, with excellent interviewing skills.

I broke first.

Me: ‘I think you can sense my level of interest in this position.’

Int: ‘Yes, and if there’s any opening in the future for a position at your level we’ll let you know.’

Which is code for ‘if this guy ever submits a resume again, just throw it out.’ I got the little 3-day training gig I was after, but I wish I had lied a little, and pretended I had a little more enthusiasm for the position. I could have done a couple of years there and quit after saving a little cash. But then, I probably would have let that slip too.”

8. “…two gigantic updates that stressed good reputations over sleazy tactics.”

“I tanked an interview on purpose. Walked in for a web design/programming gig. Everyone immediately ducked behind their screens when the boss walked out.

One employee gave me a sad look like, ‘Don’t do it.’

The interview started. The two guys in charge were very proud of how they ‘do the Google’ to attract customers.

This means they use varying tactics to show up prominently in Google’s search results pages. It’s typically low quality Search Engine Optimization. If they sold yellow boxes of facial tissues and you wanted to buy a yellow box of facial tissues online, then they would have done a lot to make sure Google points to their site for a ‘yellow facial tissues’ search.

Some of it is good for end users, some of it is bad for the entire Internet.

Anyway, that was their gimmick. They ‘do the Google.’ Another gem was, ‘We’ve read a book and a couple of blogs, and we think we know what we’re doing.’

So, I decided to be completely honest. I told them that end users wanted a site to have a good reputation more than good rankings. I stressed that it’s important to have a presence, message, and outreach that’s attractive to clients.

I said that Google was soon going to follow those end users. They got frustrated, even a little upset, and the interview ended. Then I made the hour-long drive home and felt glad to be out of there.

Within the next year, Google pushed two gigantic updates that stressed good reputations over sleazy tactics.

I have no regrets.”

9. “Of course I’m a Superstar and you’d be an idiot not to hire me.”

“A friend told me about a job where he worked which involved a technical management position building a theme park.

The hiring VP was out of the country, but his assistant decided to fly me to California four days before the interview so the team could meet me and I could better understand the scope of the project.

I dove right in and attended all of the planning meetings and design sessions. In the second meeting I made a suggestion the resulted in savings of over half a million dollars.

Several other similar suggestions over the next few days made me a shoe in for the job so I went to the actual interview with high expectations. Sitting across from the VP, it was pretty clear he was not pleased that I had become so engaged without his knowledge and seemed intent to find some weakness.

After several belligerent questions which clearly pointed to the fact that he wasn’t going to hire me, he finally shouted, ‘You must think you are some kind of Superstar!’

My immediate reply just before he ordered me out of his office was, ‘Of course I’m a Superstar and you’d be an idiot not to hire me.’ As you might imagine I did not get the job.”

10. “…when I replied with my number he literally spewed coffee all over his desk…”

“I had a second interview with a publisher for a senior editor slot at a medium-sized newspaper. I really wanted to stay in the area and was willing to compromise on money so when asked what my salary requirements were, I low-balled with a number that was at the absolute bottom of my scale.

The publisher was taking a drink of coffee at that moment and when I replied with my number he literally spewed coffee all over his desk and snapped, ‘That’s more than I make!’

End of interview.”

11. “Do you have Netflix?”

“I interviewed with Netflix a few years back and they asked me, ‘Do you have Netflix?’

I said ,’Well no, because I don’t want my kids to watch too much TV.’

They still continued the rest of the interview but it was pretty obvious that I didn’t make it.”

12. “But I didn’t want to do the job.”

“The exchange went like this:

Interviewer: ‘You don’t really want this job, do you?’

Me: ‘No.’

I was interviewing for a vacation job stacking shelves in Toys R Us over Christmas.

It was a crappy job with lousy pay. I was a Cambridge university undergraduate with an impressive CV.

I was there because I wanted to try to earn some money and I only had a few weeks away from university to do so.

My options were limited. If they’d hired me, I’d have worked hard and done a good job for them.

But I didn’t want to do the job. It was going to be mind-bogglingly boring and I was going to end up taking home just over £100 a week which wasn’t going to move the needle much.

So when I was asked outright, I felt like the appropriate response was to be honest. I did go on to explain the situation, but the truth was that I did not want the job.

The interviewer was concerned (rightly) that I was massively over-qualified, (rightly) that I would be bored and (wrongly) that I wouldn’t do a good job.

They actually ended up coming back to me a few weeks later after their initial selection hadn’t worked out for some reason, but by that point I had (thank god) found something else to do.”

13. “Your answer is incomplete. The client will not accept that answer.”

“I was interviewing for a consulting firm internship during my first year of business school. They sat me down, handed me a 3-page case description and said I had 3 minutes to read it.

Then the interviewer began asking a series of questions that relied heavily on data presented in the case. I was told that I could not see the case document again and that I had to give a concrete numerical answer to each question, even though his questions were such that any meaningful answer required considerable number-crunching.

The interviewer’s manner was aggressive.

He would cut me off and say things like, ‘Your answer is incomplete. The client will not accept that answer.’ After flailing at this for 10 minutes or so, I asked him to end the interview.

Looking somewhat surprised, he asked why. I said that, regardless of whether this type of interview was to measure my ability to think on my feet or to handle stress, the thing that it told me about them was that their culture was aggressive and discourteous, and that I probably wasn’t a good match for them.

I did not hear from them again.’

14. “to become CEO in a year or so.”

“I’ve had many.

On one occasion, the company head, who was interviewing me, said, ‘Here are the rules – I ask, you answer.’ I said sure, but first I’d like to know why they are hiring when the company looks as if it is about to go bankrupt.

I suppose that was the very question they were avoiding. In the end, they hired a colleague (and then went under in less than 6 months). Later I asked him why he took the job and he said he was leaving his wife and wanted to work in the other city where their head office was (and besides, he negotiated a good severance ahead of time).

Good answer.

For me, I’d often go to interviews because someone asked whom I couldn’t refuse and because I did want a change and so wanted the practice at interviewing, but knew some of these weren’t really good choices.

There are others I lost out on without knowing exactly why until shortly after. Once the recruiter asked about a backrest I used to carry to avoid back problems and I bragged about having a patent on it (I did actually), proud to show my inventiveness and creativity.

That led to a series of questions from him about whether I was fit enough to work, not to cost them on their sick plan, able to fly for business… ‘with my bad back.’ No amount of me telling him I used the backrest to AVOID HAVING a bad back would change his mind and a day or so later I got the rejection call I pretty much expected. In another (all these were for HR VP jobs) they asked, what my long term, ultimate career goal was and I said, ‘To be the biggest and best HR VP on earth.’

I learned later from seeing who they chose that the answer they wanted was, ‘to become CEO in a year or so.’ (That was the answer he’d given me when I asked him that for an organization I was on the board of, so I could guess that would have been ‘the right answer’ – and often you can’t guess at the time). Why they wanted an HR expert who just saw the job as a one-year stepping stone I can only guess at, but you never know with some companies.

In all these, I wasn’t too worried about being brutally honest, since I had a pretty good job and was only interested if the one on offer actually looked better. By the time you get to the interview, your research should have answered that and your goal is to meet your potential new direct boss and see if he or she is any good.

The boss is the most important feature of any job! If it turns out something is wrong there are a hundred ways to get yourself rejected without burning bridges, just by being honest – and, honestly, you only want to work for a company that accepts honesty.”

15. “I told them this was impossible and asked if they wanted an honest employee…”

“I interviewed for a position which required 10 years of Adobe InDesign experience, at the time InDesign had been on the market for less than 7 years.

I told the interviewer I had experience with Quark and Pagemaker for over 10 years, but since InDesign was only 7 years old, I only had 7 years experience with that particular program.

The interviewer informed me they had many other applicants who had over ten years experience with InDesign. I told them this was impossible and asked if they wanted an honest employee or one who only told them what they wanted to hear?

I did not hear back so I guess I got my answer.”

True story, I once threw a job interview because the guy who would have managed me came off as a total mess. So I set expectations way too high when asked, “Where do you see yourself within the company in 6 months?

I told them that I expected to get a promotion in about 6 month’s time. The tone in the room changed immediately. Needless to say, they were not pleased. And I didn’t get the job.

Still, it was one of the most instructive experiences of my professional life because what it taught me is I do have control in those interviews. Basically, always (ALWAYS!) be willing to walk away from an interview if you don’t like what they’re saying or what their offer is. And never settle for less than what you think you’re worth. Because how you value yourself is the most important thing you can do in your career.

I guaranteed you that’s some advice you’ll use again and again. So remember it. ?

The post 15 People Whose Brutal Honesty Lost them a Job Opportunity appeared first on UberFacts.

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Teachers Share the Moment They Knew They Had to Quit

Being a teacher is a hard job, and often a thankless one.

And sometimes the stress and headaches just get to be too much. Teachers of AskReddit shared the stories about how they finally decided they had to quit.

1. Didn’t last long

“I taught middle school science in a small rural district in southern Illinois. The superintendent made a position for his wife in our cash-strapped system. Due to scheduling, it moved me out of a job that I loved, into teaching second grade. I lasted 8 days.

When the superintendent called me to tell me that I was moving, he told me not to get the union involved or fight it. I did give him a piece of my mind while on the phone, and I heard rumors that the move was coming so I made plans to leave.

If people ask me why I left, I just tell them that education has gone from making people learners to too focused on test scores. Students lack critical thinking skills.

I quit for about 1.5 years and went to work at a car manufacturing company. I left there, just wasn’t my thing. And now I’m teaching middle school science in a different district.”

2. Career change

“Good timing. I’ve been teaching high school for about four years. I’ve found the work incredibly gratifying in some ways, but I’ve never been all that happy. I start a new job after Christmas break. My kids don’t know that I won’t be teaching them next semester. :/

Stuff I like:

I really, truly love helping kids learn. I love seeing them discover or rediscover a love for reading and writing.

I’m proud that my students feel safe and cared about when they’re in my room. Some of my best teaching moments have nothing to do with my subject area, but instead come from being that “trusted adult” that’s there for students who are going through tough times and need someone to care about them. I have a drawer full of notes and letters students have written me – I cry every time I look through them.

I’ve worked on two campuses and student taught at a third, and for the most part, I’ve enjoyed the people I’ve worked with.

Obviously, the time off is sweet. Having summers and breaks is super nice.

I don’t think there was a single “straw that broke the camel’s back,” but here are some things that led to be wanting to switch professions:

Not enough planning time. Like, not even close to enough. You get one class period a day, which is often eaten up with all sorts of meetings (504/SST/ARD/etc). I get to work early every day, stay after really late, and I still end up having to grade/lesson plan on the weekend.

Horrible work/life balance. I give a lot to my kids – but someone is always there asking for more. Volunteer on weekends for this or that, sponsor this club, come to sports events, etc. After about a year of teaching I realized that I had stopped having any real life outside of school.

State testing. I’m lucky to work in a district that doesn’t harp on it like others do, but when the test is getting close, it’s all anyone can talk about. It’s not an accurate way to measure student growth and it has a tendency to suck out any natural curiosity kids have about learning. Want to ruin how a person feels about reading and writing for the rest of their lives? Shove standardized test prep down their throats for two months.

Being a performer every day is exhausting. I’m basically not allowed to have a bad day, because the kids need me every day. Also, dealing with subs is THE WORST. I usually go to work even when I feel awful (as long as I’m not contagious), because coming up with sub plans and dealing with the fallout of the kids who don’t know how to behave with someone else in the room is not worth it.

There’s not a lot of room to grow in your career. I knew I didn’t want to be an administrator, so I very quickly felt like I was stuck. I saw old timer teachers around that just seemed beaten down and depressed after 30+ years of teaching, and I didn’t want to end up like that.

The paperwork. I spend so so so so much time dealing with SPED accommodations/504 forms/etc., it’s just unreal.

What it really boils down to, is that it’s impossible for me to be good at my job in every way I’d like to be. I can either 1) plan good lessons that engage the kids, 2) give useful feedback on student work, 3) be a paperwork superstar, or 4) be a teacher that’s involved with extracurricular activities. But I can’t do all of them at the same time, or even most of them. I know I’m a good teacher. My evaluators at each campus I’ve been on have uniformly loved me. I know I’ve been a good influence on many of my students. But I always, always, always, feel like I’m not doing my job good enough. I’m always behind. I have to pick what I think is most important, and just deal with the fallout of not doing the other stuff that well. It’s draining and depressing.

Oh, and cellphones. I know it’s not just a problem for kids, but we’re in the midst of a serious technology addiction problem. Many students are straight up incapable of carrying on a conversation, even with their friends, without staring at their phones every few seconds. Focusing on anything that requires brainpower is legitimately out of the question for some of them. It makes teaching frustrating when you feel like you’re giving it your all, and you look around and realize that some (it’s always just some, but sometimes it feels like most/all) of them would prefer shitposting memes and snapchatting with their friends.

Again, I love my kids, and there’s a lot that I love about teaching, but I have had plenty of moments where I look around the room and think to myself, “fine, fuck this. If you don’t care about your own learning, why should I? Have fun reading and writing like first graders for the rest of your adult lives.” For example, I have one student who has had a seriously horrible life. It breaks my heart, and I’ve spent a lot of my time this year working with him directly, trying to build him up. He’s a “trouble maker” and mouths off and has gotten in plenty of fights. The in-district alternative school won’t take him because of his violent history. This kid desperately needs help and some kind of life path.

He expressed interest in a specific trade, so the administration jumped through hoops to get him into a program that would, for free, enable him to learn that trade and graduate with some kind of certificate or licence. He got kicked out of the program after less than a month because he ignored class and played on his phone all day, so he never even learned the required safety guidelines that he needed to know to operate the equipment he was supposedly interested in learning about. Teens, especially teen boys, have undoubtedly ALWAYS had problems with executive functioning, but cell phones take that natural weakness and turn it into a gaping, infected, life threatening wound.

I knew going into the job that most teachers quit less than five years in. I thought I could handle it. I wasn’t in it for money or glory or recognition. But even in a good district and school, the deck is so stacked against you. I’m not looking forward to telling my kids that I won’t be their teacher next semester. Some of them will be mad, and some will probably cry. I will likely get embarrassingly emotional when I tell them myself. But teaching feels like being in an abusive relationship, and I’m ready to walk away from it.”

3. Walked out

“Crappy, selfish, ignorant staff. They were always bad, but tolerable. My last group refused to do much of anything and bullied me mercilessly. The last straw was when one refused to move to a different classroom and verbally attacked me over it. As if it were my fault. The move was in the best interest of the child.

I basically walked out and my bosses were completely understanding as they saw what I’d been dealing with for ten years. This was a special education room with children with profound disabilities that required a lot of care. I’d been teaching 18 years. Residential facility.”

4. Cliques

“The other teachers were gossipy and cliquey like they had never graduated high school (I started teaching at 30 after having worked in different types of jobs). They talked sh*t about each other all the time. The one teacher they all told me to avoid turned about to be the only teacher I could stand. Like me, she also worked “in the real world.”

The principal wanted me to lower my standards (which were exactly the state standards for that class. Nothing higher) because “they didn’t grow up talking about Shakespeare at the dinner table, like you.” Umm neither of my parents graduated high school so I don’t know why he assumed I was in some over educated household just because I had a few degrees. He was also just a major asshole. (He later was demoted from principal back to a teacher because he was terrible).

The students were okay, but I couldn’t stand the other teachers.”

5. I’m out

“I had a severe ear infection and temporarily lost my hearing for 3 days.

Tried to push through it for the first day but realised that not being able to hear the 30 9-year-olds in my class made teaching them pretty difficult.

I took 2 days off and sent highly detailed plans to the supply who was covering me. This was the only time I took off for the whole year.

I return to work to no less than 10 complaints. Apparently my sick leave was ‘incredibly selfish’ as having a different teacher for 2 days was ‘very confusing’ for the poor darlings, who couldn’t cope.

The Head teacher backed me up and told them to, respectfully, f*ck off but that was very much the last straw.

I’m bending over backwards working weekends and evenings for you and your kid but you can’t afford me a little human decency? I’m out.”

6. Not gonna happen

“Friend of mine quit on the spot when he was asked to change a student’s grade.

The kid missed over 50% of the classes, never handed in homework, did poorly on tests, etc, and ended up failing the class. He truly earned his failing grade. Because his father was an influential member of the school board/generous donor/blah blah blah, they “couldn’t” let the kid have a failing grade on his record.

Summer school was also not an option because the family had already scheduled a vacation during the time that summer classes would be in session. So, the principal told my buddy that he had to change the student’s grade to a passing grade.

My buddy told the principal he would absolutely not sign off on that, and if it was so important to him, to change the grade himself. He then. said “if you do change it, don’t expect to see me back here in September.” Sure enough, the grade got changed, and my buddy packed up his shit and left.”

7. Wild

“My 6th grade substitute science teacher quit in the middle of class. We were wild and unruly. Totally out of control. I watched him rub his forehead in frustration and he stands up, yells “F*CK EVERY ONE OF YOU!”, grabs his briefcase and walks out. It wasn’t singularly my fault but I still feel really bad about it. I’m sorry, Mr. Messina.”

8. Figuratively died

“I was teaching journalism in college.

A student handed in an article, which was supposed to go in a newspaper, that included no research and multiple emoticons.

Emoticons. This was before Buzzfeed.

So I gave the paper an F, and said come talk to me about this. I explained in short form why journalism exists, why it is important, and that his worst grade is dropped so this doesn’t have to hurt him. Hell, I would accept a redo.

The student in question was an athlete in a big state school for throwing balls fast.

I got shit from the dean of students, my department chair, other professorial types. Why wouldn’t I let it go? Was I racist or hate sports or what?

I just wanted him to try a little harder at the thing that was his college major. I used to pick my words so meticulously because communication is so important.

I held to my ethics, he got a tutor after a couple weeks, but it broke me. My mom had died less than a month prior and I had to explain to a college dean why “lol ;)” in the context of a journalistic article about a bar was unacceptable.

My father spent years learning English, and speaks it better than I do. This motherfucker threw balls fast and because of that I was supposed to pass him without question. Let’s go football, but between that and mom dying I could not go on. I figuratively died in that meeting.”

9. Breakdown

“Had a mental breakdown, brought about by stress: curriculum changes, meaning that low ability pupils were constant told that they were not good enough; less money meaning redundancies. Then the pressure of performance related pay with same said disinterested and low ability children. It was either leave teaching or commit suicide. Very supportive family and well paid partner meant that I could stop.”

10. Future felon

“Two things happened at once. After 4 years of teaching seventh grade:

A girl who complained to me for an entire semester of being harassed/groped brought a pocket knife to school and threatened a boy with it if he grabbed her breast again. SHE was expelled. I reported the incidents to administrators, school resource officers, and guidance counselors. They ignored her, me, and her other two teachers until she became that desperate for him to stop. Assholes.

Also, a “troubled” student (read: future felon, now a current felon) saw me walking from the convenience store with my goddaughter. He followed us and found my house. Started riding by, throwing stuff in my yard, yelling obscenities, etc. School resource officer said to go to the police; they said to go go him.

Final straw: he climbed on my fence and shot my dog with a paintball gun. I threatened to quit on the spot so they moved him from my class. Then over Christmas break, he stabbed and ruined my inflatable decorations.

I finished the year and was done. The girl from the first story homeschooled to finish high school, went to college, and just started her P.A. program. The future felon became an actual felon at 18, and is still in jail. Go figure.”

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15 Times Things Went WAY Better Than They Should Have

“Well, isn’t that convenient?” How many times have you said that in your life?

Sometimes the universe just seems to be looking out for you. These AskReddit folks shared the most convenient things that ever happened to them.

1. That worked out

“Was overseas for a conference and I had taken a tour on the weekend before it, and met some peeps. One was a group from America and the other a girl from Germany. As the tour wound down I gave out my email address and told them to contact me so we could do something the following day.

The next day I go have lunch with the Americans first, and I’m on a train back in the direction I’m staying in, but wasn’t too sure around public transport at the time. I get a call from the German girl who asks if I’d like to have coffee with her in a certain suburb. As she says that I look up, the train door opens and it has the suburb name on the wall. I climb off the train, walk out the station and she’s right there.”

2. Cruisin’

“In 2010 my dad was at a hotel across the state. Two things you need to know about my dad: he is always hot, and he is very stubborn. So he goes to open the window in his hotel room but it was jammed and wouldn’t open. So he yanked on it until he popped a tendon in his arm. He went to the hospital and got rushed back to our city, it was a big deal because if he didn’t have surgery within 72 hours he would likely lose use of his arm.

But he got the surgery, workman’s comp paid for it because he had been on a business trip, and all was well. But then the hotel called, saying they wanted to compensate him so that he wouldn’t sue. My dad assured them he is not the suing type, he recognized it was his own fault, etc., and even offered to sign something saying he wouldn’t sue, but they were insistent on providing compensation. So finally, my dad told them he wouldn’t even know what to ask for.

The hotel, who was affiliated with Holland America Cruise Lines, replied and said: “how about a free cruise for four anywhere Holland America sails, and $10000 to get you to the location of the port?” So he said… yeah okay.

So the summer before my senior year of high school, me, my parents, and my best friend went on a Mediterranean cruise that went through Spain, Monaco, Italy, Greece, and Croatia, and the cruise/travel cost us nothing. It was f*cking amazing.”

3. I believe

“Once I was about to get a haircut which would have cost me £9, however I only had £7 as I spend £3 earlier that day. Now I had to get this haircut otherwise I would have been killed by my mum as she is the one who gave me the money for that specific reason.

So there I was sitting and hoping I would be able to negotiate something, with each passing minute I was getting more nervous. When a miracle happened. A man approached me and told me that he is in a hurry and will pay for my haircut if I give him my space. And on that day for a minute I believed in God.”

4. Rolled on in

“I ran out of gas on a long one lane bridge with a gas station at the end on the left side of the road. Had enough momentum to get over the bridge, had a large enough break in traffic to turn left without braking, and saw that one pump was open on the correct side of my car. Rolled into the station and didn’t even need to touch the brake to stop at the pump. I should also mention the bridge was flat so I didn’t have any hills to help me out.

I’m pretty sure my lottery chances are shot with all the luck I blew in that one minute.”

5. Right person at the right time

“I got on the wrong bus and didn’t even realize until it made the first stop. I got off there and was in a panic of what to do since I had to be somewhere at a certain time. The first stop was a college campus I had never been to. I saw somebody going out to her car, who turned out to be a professor, and I went to ask her about a bus that ran from the school. She just asked where I needed to be and she gave me a ride to the place for free. I ran into the right person at the right time.”

6. Boom!

“I started a new job and about 2 months later they announced that everyone was getting laid off as they were moving the billing office to another branch in a different state in a few months.

As an incentive they offered up to $2,000 bonuses for the people who remained the longest to clear up all remaining balances to make the transition more easy. I ended up convincing my old manager at my previous job to re-hire me a few weeks after the announcement.

Months later after I had left I ended up getting a check in the mail for the full bonus amount which I cashed ASAP.”

7. On vacation

“When I was maybe 15 or so, my mom told me to go to the doctor to get health report (for some documentation, it’s a long story). I didn’t want to go, so I lied that I went and the doctor was on vacation. Later, she comes into my room saying, “So, I called the doctor to make sure…”, and I’m like “OH SH*T”, and then she continues “So, you were right, she is on vacation indeed.”

I still can’t believe this happened.”

8. Helping hand

“I was cycling in a very isolated area, exploring my province, when one of my tires blew. I wasn’t even carrying any repair tools with me, so I was left with the only option to walk back 20 miles to the nearest village and either look for help or cancel my trip and take a bus back home. Not 1 minute after I started walking two cyclists appeared on the horizon. They happily fixed my tire and I was able to complete my ride. Montreal – Percé.”

9. Lemme, lemme upgrade

“One time I got into the wrong line when boarding a plane, but the attendant said “go on ahead” and instantly upgraded me to first class.”

10. Might have starved

“Went island camping with a friend of mine on a little sail boat. We did not have a gas stove to heat our food in, we instead had a metal frame that used firewood. Unfortunately, where we landed was void of any sort of wood. I’m convinced this was Deus ex machina at play here , but we conveniently found a store-bought log of firewood in this tiny island. Would have starved without it.”

11. That’s always nice

“Back in 2003 when you could fill at the pump then pay, I filled my car and went in to pay. The guy said that pump didn’t register a sale. Told me to have a nice day. I got around $38 worth of free gas.”

12. That was quick

“Bought a car for $2000. Picked it up and drove it 3 blocks home. Guy across the street sees the for sale sign and asks how much. Tell him I just bought it and he offers me $4500. He goes and gets me cash, I sign it over to him. $2500 bucks made in 30 mins.”

13. Lazy and happy

“Married the girl next door. We were friend and neighbors for almost a decade. We were frustrated being single and did the “hey! wanna date.” After we got married moving her in was a friggin dream! We kept the 2nd apt for 2 months, that was fun too. She didn’t have to change her address. Now that I think about it. We might be the laziest happily married couple.”

14. Easy!

“I had an AMEB piano exam coming up and I was supposed to have prepared two extra pieces, one of which the examiner would ask me to play (but you don’t know which one they’ll pick of course).

One, I had nailed. The other, from the very beginning, was a piece I never really liked much and I’d only learnt the first couple of pages – the rest of the piece would probably sound like someone playing it for the first time. Honestly, I didn’t give that piece nearly as much time as I should’ve.

So I went into that exam just HOPING the examiner would pick my good piece. Exam day came around and the examiner picked the piece I could only half play. CRAP.

Then, by some incredible alignment of the stars, she says ‘I’ll just get you to play to the end of the second page.’

Yes, of course Mrs Examiner, easy!”

15. A dream

“The job description literally was “off-role job, you have been notified”

I thought it was a joke, I applied on it anyway. Turns out Its one of the biggest Automobile giants in world desperately needing a graphic designer who is ready for an off-role job.

Its EXACTLY 12 minutes ride on Motorbike to and 17 minutes fro.

Got a chill boss who’s barely 9 years older than me and completely fine with me showing up 45 minutes late to work EVERYDAY as long as the work is done before I leave ON TIME.

When asked about the funny job description, she grilled the HR dept about funky job description.

some perks of my job

An hour late on job is acceptable EVERDAY. (due to my boss’s designation)
Mostly leave on time 5 minutes give or take extra
A less polite conversation makes my boss thinks she is scolding me and 5 minutes later she politely but professionally apologizes for ‘yelling’ at me. LOL
Can take up to 3,15-20 minutes break excluding lunch break
Company has an agency already hired who does half of my work. (I’m there for emergency creatives)
This is absolutely a dream job for a second job.”

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People Share The Rudest Assumptions Someone Has Made About Them

I wish more people would stop making assumptions about someone without knowing anything about them It’s so prevalent, and a lot of times we do it without even realizing.

What really sucks is when people assume the worst about you.

1. MRStaken

I have an undercut for my hair and wear it to the side, it almost hits my shoulder. I get misgenedered all the time because of this.

Apparently people look right beyond the facial hair and just call me miss, ma’am, lady, or whatever. Pretty much whenever this happens I just laugh it off because its kinda funny honestly and people make mistakes. I make sure they don’t feel bad about it when they realize it or just let them go and not correct them, its whatever.

But sometimes people get shitty and try to argue with me about why do I look like a girl. So I’d say thats pretty fuckin rude.

The assumption is whatever, just continuing to pester and get shitty to me about it is what I think is really rude about the whole thing.

2. Guys… stop saying this!!!!

That I can’t possibly be smart enough to do my job (security side of tech) because I’m an attractive woman. (Not assuming here – have had guys say this to me explicitly.)

It did help quickly weed out the assholes while I was dating, though.

3. A mediocre friend…

I was hanging out a friend and it had been about a month after we had met etc, and they said, “The best thing about you is that you’re happy being mediocre”.

This felt especially bad as at that time in my life, I had just had a string of failures and was already pretty down.

4. Why you so judgey old lady?

I was in target and stopped to look at a really cute swim suit for a baby that was on display in the aisle.

Two older ladies passed by and one of them said “she’s way too young to have a child” nose in the air.

I was in my mid 20s, probably the same age or older than she was when she had kids.

5. Again, trade jobs pay really well. People need to wise up.

That I’m probably just some uneducated immigrant who can’t speak English.

I’m Mexican, I drive a truck for a living. I make more doing this than putting my bachelor’s to use.

I don’t talk much because I’m tired, grumpy and depressed all of the time.

6. You WISH you made what he does…

I went to walmart while taking a break from painting the nursery. I was fairly spattered in paint and trying to pick a pizza. I heard a lady tell her kid “that is why you go to school so you don’t have a job like that”. There are layers to just how fucked up that was. Not the least of which is house painters can make pretty decent money.

7. When HR needs to apologize…

At a past employer someone complained to HR that I was allegedly playing inappropriate Rap music and too loudly at my desk.

I get called into HR to explain myself and told them it wasn’t me…it was the white guy sitting two desks behind me and he came in to admit it because he didn’t think it was such a big deal to be in trouble for.

It was probably the fact that since I was the only black guy where I sit in a certain part of the office, they just naturally assumed it was me.

You can imagine the sheer embarrassment on part of HR that came after.

8. Are they counting inner beauty?

“Why won’t you date her? Are you gay?”

“No, I just don’t like her”

“But she is prettier than you… ”

Happens strangely often, even if not with those exact words.

9. At this point… how do people not realize video games are entertainment like everything else?

That I’m lazy because I really enjoy videogames.

Bitch, I have a full-time job, house, car, wife, and a dog.

I also do most of the cooking, cleaning, dog-walking, and general chores around the house because my wife works crazy hours.

Lazy my ass.

10. So this one actually probably hurt quite a bit.

That I was stupid enough not to figure out that the guy I had a crush on in middle school was paid to go on a date with me as a joke.

10+ years later I’m still pissed.

Though based on how he’s doing now I dodged a real bullet there lmao

11. Just like a bad movie…

Well… There was the time I was an engineering student at a very well respected school and a mother told her son to make sure to get good grades so he didnt end up working in a movie theater like me. To my face.

I liked working there and did it because I was early in college and needed some extra cash.

I guess everyone that works at a movie theater is just a dumbass then instead of high school/college kids like we all were.

So that was pretty shit.

12. Good for you mom!

That I was being horribly disrespectful in a church ceremony.

In reality I was my little sisters Confirmation sponsor (Catholic rite) and was also in end stage liver failure. Was on lots of meds for pain and my brain was marinating in ammonia so I had several head drops (like when you’re falling asleep) during the 2 hour mass. Woman next to me berates me for being ‘so rude and disrespectful’

Luckily my mom found her afterwards and tore her a new one.

13. Not an only child

My (only) sister died when I was 15, when people I don’t particularly know or like very well ask me if I have siblings, I usually just say no – I don’t like to talk about it and it’s a conversation killer. But it’s surprising how many have replied with: ‘oh, only child? You must have been spoiled.’

I love then saying: ‘well I had a sister but she died.’ The look on their face is priceless ? Keep your judgements to yourselves, people.

14. Gender bender

When I was working at Best Buy in my teens/early 20’s, people would ask me to my face if I could go and get a “male” worker to answer their questions because they felt “more comfortable” asking them about it (stuff like game consoles, cameras and equipment, ipods, that was the area I worked in).

The fun part was watching the customers faces malfunction that male coworker would walk them back over to me, because I knew what I was doing in that department and they only knew their stuff when it came to TVs or washers and dryers.

15. Well, that’s quite a sales pitch…

A girl I met for a date on an app once said to me at the end of the date that I should see her again because a guy of my height won’t have many options.

16. Not zee person you thought he was…

I am a german living abroad so i have a german accent.

Also since i have had a receding hairline since my teens i have a short hair cut.

So yeah you’d be suprised how many times held me for a nazi.

My father and I were in Prague when we heard an English woman say to her friend, about us, ”they look so British they can’t be British”, which I don’t think was a compliment.

Okay, we were British but I think that was a bit uncalled for.

17. Hugs, not drugs

I have ADHD so I talk fast, I’m super tall and lanky and also suffer from all year around allergies.

Multiple times I’ve been told I have a cocaine addiction.

18. “Fuckular”

Just because I have these muscular fuckular forearms, babes are always asking me to twist the caps off of everything.

The truth, I have really soft under hands, and caps tear me up really good.

Well, that was uncomfortable.

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13 Game-Changing Scientific Discoveries Everyone Needs To Know About

I fucking love science. Because science can help us create things that seem like magic, but they’re real and they usually help humanity.

Recently a reddit thread asked the following question: What are some recent scientific breakthroughs/discoveries that aren’t getting enough attention? Of course, reddit users didn’t disappoint with their knowledge of all those things we haven’t heard about, but need to.

So check out these 13 discoveries and have faith in science. Because it’s provable and actually helps us all.

Amen.

1. Carbon Dioxide Flakes?

That we have figured out how to suck CO2 out of the atmosphere and now, very recently, how to turn it into solid flakes of carbon again. And not just under higly specific and expensive lab conditions, this process is apparently scalable.

We still need to curb emissions but this does flip the equation quite a bit regarding global warming, allowing us to put some of the toothpaste back into the tube so to speak.

Coupled with wind and solar energy, I predict this will become a major industry by mid-century, and very pure carbon an abundant material.

2. New killer whales?

Don’t know if anyone has pointed this one out… but pretty certain scientists have discovered a new species of orcas that live in sub-Antarctic waters.

They are calling it the “Type-D Orca”… pretty cool looking animals.

More rounded heads… smaller white eye patches… taller, narrower dorsal fins…

Being a soon to be marine biology grad, this excites me!

3. MDMA helping PTSD?

If the final trials go well (they are predicted to and the previous trials have done), MDMA-assisted psychotherapy will soon be an FDA-approved treatment for PTSD.

It is administered in a couple of doses over a few weeks and has lifelong effects.

The group doing this research got FDA Breakthrough Therapy status for it a few years ago and have been carrying out the phase 3 trials since early last year.

They were doing research into the same thing in Israel and it just got approved for compassionate use for PTSD in Israel this month.

Organization is called MAPS and they do some really interesting work.

4. Gluten-free?

There’s a good chance there will be a cure for celiac disease within the next 10 years.

There’s currently an active and ongoing clinical trial where participants (with diagnosed celiac) are getting infusions that will ultimately reverse the autoimmune response a person with celiac has when they consume gluten. It’s still far from complete, but we are closer than we’ve ever been to curing celiac disease.

**The clinical trial is taking place in Cleveland, Ohio. I was asked to be a part of it but unfortunately I just don’t have the extra time. If anybody local wants more information please message me and I can get you in contact with one of the researchers!

5. Skin guns?

Pretty recently they started doing tests for an extremely mobile skin grafting machine. It uses a kind of hydrogel out of the patient’s own skin, and scans the area of the burn then just prints out the skin.

Also, I saw a video a while ago about a guy who had a solution of skin cells airbrushed on the burn (mostly 2nd degree, IIRC). In 3-4 days he was healed with no scarring. The skin gun: https://youtu.be/eXO_ApjKPaI

6. Chemo that doesn’t poison you?

My job is coming came out with a drug that reduces the damage chemotherapy does to the body and helps regenerate blood cells faster, allowing for stronger doses to be administered and treatment scheduled to be reduced heavily.

This allows doctors to treat cancer more aggressively.

7. Bionic parts?

You can get hands and feet that are pretty close to the actual thing that operate by feeling the muscles that remain.

We will soon be long gone from the days of military style hooks and lumps of solid plastic.

8. Mental health issues caused by inflammation?

One of the more recent theories in psychiatry gaining popularity (although it was acknowledged decades ago) is the role of inflammation and the immune system in mental illness. There are studies showing that in schizophrenia and other psychotic conditions, inflammation attacks the brain. Some of the damage by inflammation might be irreversible, so the hope is that early intervention could prevent chronic schizophrenia. Trials have been attempted with anti-inflammatories like fish oil, with mixed success.

The role of inflammation has been extended to multiple mental illnesses, like depression, with raised inflammatory markers and other evidence being a common finding. Ultimately mental illness is multifactorial, and the causes are often biological, psychological, and/or social. So we can’t reduce something so complex and heterogenous to just an action by the immune system. But it has gained some excitement in the field because there could be people out there, for example, with schizophrenia for whom one of the primary causes is immune system dysregulation, and researchers are racing to find a prevention.

9. Diabetes no more?

They’re getting closer to a cure for type 1 diabetes. There’s already multiple people who have been cured with no need for insulin for years now after a clinical study

Here is the man that’s been cured: https://www.cityofhope.org/breakthroughs/rose-parade-diabetes-patient-roger-sparks

Here is a good breakdown of what they found in 2018: https://www.cityofhope.org/breakthroughs/wanek-project-to-cure-type-1-diabetes-18-months-later

And this is the latest new on the study: https://www.cityofhope.org/breakthroughs/study-by-diabetes-expert-describes-promising-type-1-treatments

10. New physics?!

Astronomer here!

Most of you have heard that the universe is expanding. Astrophysicists believe there is a relationship between the distance to faraway galaxies and how fast they are moving from us, called the Hubble constant.

We use the Hubble constant for… just about everything in cosmology, to be honest. This isn’t crazy and has been accepted for many decades.

What is crazy is, if you are paying attention, it appears the Hubble constant is different depending on what you use to measure it!

Specifically, if you use the “standard candle” stars (Cepheids and Type Ia supernovae) to measure how fast galaxies are speeding away from us, you get ~73 +/- 1 km/s/Mpc.

If you study the earliest radiation from the universe (the Cosmic Microwave Background) using the Planck satellite, you get 67 +/- 1 km/s/Mpc. This is a LOT, and both methods have a lot of confidence in that measurement with no obvious errors.

To date, no one has come up with a satisfactory answer for why this might be, and in the past year or so it’s actually a bit concerning. If they truly disagree, well, it frankly means there is some new, basic physics at play.

Exciting stuff! It’s just so neat that whenever you think you know how the universe works, it can throw these new curveballs at you from the most unexpected places!

11. Glad + Metal = ?!

Earlier this month, scientists were able to successfully weld glass and metal together using ultrafast (on the order of picoseconds, which are such a short unit of time that compared to it, a full second might as well be 30,000 years) laser pulses.

This hasn’t been successfully done before due to the very different thermal properties of glass and metal.

This is actually a pretty big breakthrough in manufacturing and could lead to stronger yet lighter materials.

12. Special K treats depression?

The FDA just approved ketamine as an antidepressant for treatment-resistant depression in the form of esketamine as a nasal spray.

It’s of the few unique and hopeful approaches to treatment-resistant depression that we’ve seen in years—some stats put the rate of recovery as high as 80%.

This doesn’t give you full recovery, but alleviation at least.

13. We’re still discovering lost history?

Göbekli Tepe – ruin discovered in Turkey that dates back to 11000 BCE, or further.

This throws a massive wrench into our understanding of what people were capable of at that time, and hints at advanced civilizations having likely existed long before we thought they did.

It has also only been about 10% excavated.

Also…

I’ve actually read some articles over the past few weeks about archaeologists using LIDAR technology to uncover Mayan ruins, and they’ve found that Mayan civilization was much more extensive than originally assumed.

At its height, its now believed that its population may have numbered near 15 million citizens, and that they engaged in extensive trade with their neighbors to the North and South; these LIDAR scans have revealed evidence of vast cities, farmlands and roadways. And this was all without any pack animals or wheeled carts.

Well, look at what science keeps doing for us!

Believe in science, folks. It always comes through eventually.

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15+ People Who Are Not Sorry At All, Thank You Very Much!

Sometimes you do something and you really regret it.

Not these 18 people! They do not regret a thing, and it’s wonderful to read. Because when you’re truly wronged, you deserve a little retribution.

Or if you want a plum… go get the plum!

You’ll see…

1. Slowly…

Slowing down when someone is tailing me.

I only do this in the slow lane, I typically move if I’m in the fast lane.

2. This aunt needs to get her priorities straight!

My aunt was about to get married to this one rich scumbag who apparently treated her “right”. My brother and I did some investigating over the fact that he had lots and I mean LOTS of female friends.

A lot of sht went on, but in the end, we found out that he was a sleeping with and is a sugardaddy to some of of them. It was just three days before the actual wedding that we found out.

Told our aunt about it, wedding was cancelled, aunt was upset with us as well for some reason, and we regret nothing.

3. The right thing to do!

Sneaking pictures of my aunt into her fathers funeral slideshow behind her sisters back.

The two never got along and one sister was in charge of the funeral. She was adamant about leaving out any photo with her sister in it. My aunt (the victim in this case) was very close with her father. So I lied to my other aunt that the slideshow was done and I downloaded a secret folder of pictures onto the slideshow. She’s so bad with technology that she didn’t notice.

Not sorry.

My other aunt gave me a teary hug after the funeral and thanked me, she knew I had been the one to slip them in. She died last month of a sudden aneurism. I’d do it again, even if my other aunt never talked to me again. I sure miss her.

4. Be kind to yourself!

I’m not sorry for focusing on me and my needs. I used to be so concerned with taking care of all my friends and family to the point that I was I was sacrificing my needs for a lot of people who would not do the same for me. I’ve learned to cut toxic people out of my life and focus on my true close friends and family rather than trying to care for everyone.

Being liked by everyone used to be so important to me and honestly it’s so exhausting. I’m not sorry if people don’t like me anymore. It’s impossible to make everyone happy.

As long as you’re not being a complete asshole, you need to take your needs into consideration as well.

5. Time to grow up kid!

I love my daughter to death, but at 25, I had to cut her off financially.

I support everything she is passionate about, but if your passion is working for non-profits and wilderness retreats, maybe you should adjust your lifestyle so you can afford your bills.

6. Bully… watch your back…

In Elementary School, a kid named Patrick was my bully and he’d do shit like “accidentally” bump into me and spill my lunch and step on the backs of my shoes.

So one day, he was coming out of the cafeteria and I stuck my leg out and watched him trip face forward into the ground. We both got sent to the Principal’s Office, and he got whatever the Elementary School version of an In-School Suspension was for his repetitive bullying while I got a slap on the wrist.

Absolutely not sorry.

7. Completely fair!

Eating the snacks that my wife has forgotten about.

8. Facebook is not real life, people!

Quitting FB and having people complain that they don’t know what I’m up to. Fucking ask me!

9. Oh, this is a really good idea…

Cutting out my dad’s side of the family from my life.

They made my life a living hell while I was growing up. I was the youngest of the cousins so I would regularly get beat up or locked in rooms (my dad worked nights). They would smash furniture and TVs then blame me. As a young adult all they did was cause more drama by still break things in my dad’s apartment, or try to start physical fights. I’ve had so many fist fights with my cousin from defending my property to protecting my cat (no one messes with my kitty).

Once I moved out of my dad’s I cut all contact with them. I maybe see them once a year when my dad tricks me into seeing them (he has the mentality of always forgive family).

They know nothing of my adult life and I know nothing of theirs and I’m going to keep it that way.

10. Charities shouldn’t pressure like this…

I refused to give money to charity. Okay, but hear me out on this.

There was a lady who was claiming to represent a charity, but acted really shady. This was at a concert in a cafe/bar. She had a clipboard and was approaching people by saying “I’m taking donations for (whatever charity). Just write down whether you’re giving $5, $10, or $20.”

She didn’t ask if you’d donate, just told you to choose how much you were giving her.

I told her I prefer giving to charities I’ve researched, because some of them only spend a low percentage of donation money on the cause (Susan B. Komen ಠ_ಠ ). The lady got angry and raised her voice at me. She tried shaming and bullying me into giving her money, and we seriously fought about it.

Eventually she turned to my friend and started pressuring him lol. He said “Yeah uh…like my friend said…” and she stormed off. You have to trust me, there was something off about her. Plus, she waited until people were buzzed at a concert before approaching to tell them to give her money.

11. Fire in the hole!

Laughing at my friend in high school who stuffed her bra with tissue and then dropped a cigarette down her cleavage and she thought the tissue was going to catch on fire and dumped a beer on herself. I refused to stuff my bra and she said I was chicken, this was her karma. I felt bad when her parents smelled the beer and grounded her for drinking though.

12. YES!

Leaving my abusive ex.

13. Hey, it’s your wedding!

Not inviting my needy aunt to go wedding dress shopping with me. She’s begged me already and has been dropping hints for months, but I’m not budging.

This is the one time in my life that something really is only about me, and I’m not going to deal with her drama that day.

14. RIP Fido *sniff*

Creating a small “pet cemetery” in our parents’ back yard, despite my father forbidding it.

It felt like the right thing to do – no regrets.

15. Plums!

Eating the plums from the icebox.

They were delicious.

So sweet, and so cold.

16. Tips ARE NOT mandatory…

I’m normally a big tipper as I worked in the industry a long time but last week I left zero tip for my server that did a horrible job.

17. Don’t be a dick to the customers, please!

When we were in high school, my friends and I would always go to the same diner.

About 85% of the time we’d get sat with this awful woman who’d treat us like shit. She’d smile and be polite with grown ups, but the smile would disappear the second she got to us. She’d leave our food on the counter for 5-10 minutes while she talked to other tables, never refill a single drink, and roll her eyes if you asked for anything.

The first few times I just figured she wasn’t trying because she thought teenagers would tip like shit, so I tipped her really well. But the shitty service continued, and eventually I just tipped her $0.

Only time I’ve ever done that, but she really earned that $0.

18. Sometimes, this is necessary.

Telling the parents of a special needs child (think similar to Down’s Syndrome) that their daughter was struggling a lot with normal schooling (even with her IEP and own lesson plans) and she would be better off in a special needs school sooner rather than later.

They said to be honest with them and I was.

Sorry, not sorry!

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20+ Security Guards Reveal the Weirdest Things They’ve Caught on Camera

Being a security guard can be kind of a dull job (depending on where you’re working, I suppose). The one thing that livens up the day is seeing all the weird things people do when they aren’t thinking about the fact that they’re in range of a CCTV camera.

Oh yeah, they’ve seen some shit.

“Watched a woman jump off a nearby highway…”

Good God, where do I even start? Been a surveillance operator for 5 years at a casino. Let’s just make a list:

Guy whipping his thing out while going up escalators, leaving a trail off urine. He was sober.

Man, super toasted, thought he saw his ex-wife’s car. Proceeded to stand on and stomp in the hood, then pass out on the windshield.

Saw one cop miss with a taser and tase another officer.

Watched a woman attempt to walk up a down escalator for eight minutes straight without moving. She eventually passed out.

Watched a woman jump off a nearby highway, land, and walk off like nothing happened.

Caught a guy (more than once) using his mobile phone camera to not-so-discreetly take upskirt shots of women standing next to him.

Caught a cashier stealing money. By pretending to sneeze, use the bill as a tissue, then shove the bill down his shirt.

Barfight. Two groups going at it. Random girl not part of the brawl grabs a bottle off the bar and tomahawk chucks it at the melee. Thankfully she somehow missed everyone.

Watched a man jump off the roof. Hit the ground and bounced about three feet. Only suicide I’ve ever seen.

There’s probably a lot more I could come up with. After you’ve seen hundreds of attempted cheats, a few people fall over dead, and a guy bounce after falling 12 stories, everything just becomes kind of mundane.

“…She gets EJECTED out of her seat.”

Worked IT for a company. One day, a lot of the head managers of this certain department come barging into my office demanding I pull some footage, serious.

I think somebody is about to get fired so I start scrubbing through footage. Finally, I get to what they want me to see. One of their team leads is rocketing through the office on an office chair when it gets stuck on something in the carpet and she gets EJECTED out of her seat.

She must have landed like 10 feet from her chair. As soon as the scene happens, the group of managers busts out laughing their butts off. I nearly peed my pants laughing, I had never been asked to pull camera footage of something so funny.

The best part is the girl just laid on the carpet while everybody around her in the room collapsed with laughter.

“Immediately my soul crushes…”

One time at work I went to the Starbucks down the street and got a delicious panini. I was so excited for this panini. Double smoked bacon and chicken.

Delish. I was working the closing shift so I was tired and just wanted to eat my panini. I pulled the little paper bag out and what I assume was the heat from the food had melted the adhesive holding the bag together and my delicious panini is now all over the break room floor.

Immediately my soul crushes, then right afterward, I’m like ‘forget this!’ and picked it right back up and ate it. It was delicious.

A few weeks later my coworkers are chatting away and whatever, one of them offhandedly mentions that our GM watches all the security cam footage on the days she isn’t at work.

She wasn’t at work that day my panini exploded everywhere.

She probably saw me eating that sandwich off the ground like a savage, so to answer the question at hand, that.

“He wasn’t there for a minute before some lady arrived and they started having relations…”

I’m the security supervisor overnight at a food dye processing plant. I sit in a guard shack and watch upwards of 20 camera feeds at a time. One night, one of my officers, who is posted up at the other side of the facility, walks away from his shack and goes to an area behind one of the buildings, out of the way.

He apparently thought there weren’t any cameras watching that particular area because he wasn’t there for a minute before some lady arrived and they started having relations, right there.

When they were done, she left and he went right back to his post. He had no idea I saw the whole thing. I didn’t talk to him about it, but I called my operations manager over in the office the next morning and told him about it.

The officer wasn’t fired. He was transferred, however. Bull, in my opinion. When an officer can be fired for being late, they should be fired for abandoning their post to meet with a lady of the night.

“The guy just took his hand out of his pocket, grabbed the goose by the neck, snapped it…”

Used to work security for a mall back in Kansas City, that city was chalk full of geese when it wasn’t winter. One day one of the store clerks called me up and told me to get animal control to dispose of a dead goose in our parking lot.

I went to the front to check it out and sure enough, there was a dead goose lying in the middle of the parking lot. Called animal control and they had it removed from the premises. Out of curiosity, I went into the back and started viewing the cameras for the parking lot thinking the goose may have just died of sickness or somebody accidentally ran him over with their car.

Nope.

Apparently, this particular goose wandered onto the parking lot and started terrorizing anyone that got near him. If you’ve encountered a goose before, you would know how much a mean bird those things are.

Everybody that came out of the store basically had to walk around the goose to get to their car, except for one guy. This dude, wearing a striped sweater and khakis, holding a bag in one hand and his other hand in his pocket started walking straight to his car.

He literally didn’t care at all that the goose was flapping his wings and honking at him, telling him to run off. The guy was about 4 feet from the goose when the goose started charging him trying to mess him up.

The guy just took his hand out of his pocket, grabbed the goose by the neck, snapped it, dropped the body in the middle of the parking lot and proceeded to get into his car and drive off.

I don’t know why, but the way he just nonchalantly snapped a goose’s neck with his bare hand and left its body for dead sent a chill down my spine.

“5 min later she would come out adjusting her skirt…”

I worked I.T. at a company that had cameras on the shop floor. The boss called me in to watch a video and get my opinion on what I thought was going on.

So the night shift had one lady working and 6 guys. When things slowed down in the middle of the night she would walk over to one of the guys, whisper in his ear, and they would both go into the girl’s bathroom together.

5 min later she would come out adjusting her skirt and the guy would follow with a huge smile on his face. Over several hours she did this with each of the 6 guys and it appeared it was a regular thing.

I said it looked like she was sleeping with everyone in the place. Well, the boss fired her for the possibility that it would lead to a harassment lawsuit.

Later I found out what was really going on. Seems she was the local weed dealer and hid her stash in her panties.

“I ask the store manager why he didn’t fire him…”

I used to work in loss prevention at a very large retail store. I had been finding wrappers and discarded packages in a place called the fixture room.

This is where they keep all the peg hooks, shelves, and racks to display products. Not many people go in there so I put up a hidden camera thinking I would catch someone stealing stuff.

Around 1:00 am a guy walks in, pulls his pants down and rubs one out all over a shelf leaning against the wall.

I show the video to the store manager and he said that the guy was his 3rd shift supervisor.

As he watches the video he starts getting mad… at me for showing it to him! I take it to my boss and he tells the store manager to fire the guy. Two weeks later I come in early one morning to see the guy clocking out.

I ask the store manager why he didn’t fire him and he said, ‘I talked to him about it and he explained what happened.’ I said, ‘Ok I gotta hear this one!’

The manager explained, ‘He had been drinking and smoking weed before he came to work and was just out of his mind. So he’s not a pervert or anything.’

The manager then told me that as punishment the guy had to clean everything in the fixture room, on his own time (unpaid) and had to submit to 4 random screenings the next year (which never happened because the manager is a cheapo).

The guy got promoted to assistant manager a year later!

“He even had a sheath on his belt and everything.”

I was staying overnight at my hotel security job in downtown San Diego one night and noticed that a homeless man had something shiny in his hands but I couldn’t determine what exactly it was just by looking at the cameras.

So I dispatched a security guard to investigate and it turns out that this guy was carrying a machete. Not a large knife. An actual life-size machete.

He even had a sheath on his belt and everything. I told my guy to keep his distance and I called the local police.

Minutes later the police show up and I got to see them in action.

They kept yelling at him to drop his machete but he was on a different planet and wasn’t hearing a word they were trying to say to him. When they finally had enough, the cop with the launcher shot him with a beanbag round and leveled him to the ground.

He dropped his machete and another cop came in and punted it away from his reach. They pinned him down and arrested him. It was awesome to watch.

“He just walked out of the building carrying the pizza box…”

I didn’t catch him in the act, but I watched a guy steal my pizza.

I was working the night shift on a Friday night and ordered pizza for my lunch. I had leftovers which I put in the staff-room fridge so I could have it for lunch the next day.

Saturday evening I come into work, I work until lunchtime, then go to grab my pizza only to discover that it is gone.

Like what!? So I check the camera feed. During the day some random guy came into our office, went to the staff-room, and stole my pizza. He just walked out of the building carrying the pizza box and the day shift guy didn’t even notice. No questions just walked in and never heard from again.

I am not sure how someone could have that level of confidence.

“This didn’t stop a middle-aged lady who cycled through every day…”

I work in IT, had to splice a video from our CCTV into our CEO’s end of year presentation.

The company had refurbished the car park, which used to have an all-access footpath running through it.

There was no legal right of way there, so they got rid of the footpath and put up signs saying it was private property.

This didn’t stop a middle-aged lady who cycled through every day, and regularly damaged parked cars with her bike when she squeezed through narrow gaps.

The alternative route was literally 50 yards out of her way to go around the car park rather than through it.

So, bigger signs go up. This is PRIVATE LAND, NO ACCESS etc.

As part of that, they install an automatic barrier. To get into or out of the car park, you have to keep your company ID badge on a sensor, the barrier raises, and you can drive through.

Cyclist lady just ignores everything.

Cycles up to the new barrier, and WHAM, her bike goes under it, and she doesn’t. She gets up, walks up to her bike and cycles off again, up the road.

The next day, they’re investigating damage to the barrier, and have a look at the CCTV.

They can’t believe she hasn’t seen the bright red and white barrier. While they’re reviewing the CCTV, she comes in again from the other direction, and WHAM.

Exactly the same thing happens again.

They run out to check if she’s OK. She refuses all help and runs away with her bike. She knows she’s not supposed to be going through here and has now made the same mistake twice.

She now goes around the car park instead of through it.

“I saw two suicide attempts, one successful.”

Worked casino surveillance for several years – so I have a lot of stories. Saw a guy receive a BJ at a roulette table, saw a couple get it on in a crowded bar.

I saw a guy get stabbed, and saw two people get hit by speeding cars. I saw a lot of people vomit, saw a lot of people pee – especially in the elevators.

Saw a guy who was drinking trip on an escalator, catching himself on the side, then slide down a 50-foot moving rail, spinning the whole time, then land on his feet without spilling his drink.

I watched people cheat at blackjack and various carnival games. I saw two suicide attempts, one successful. I saw a casino cashier stuff two hundred dollar bills in his sock.

He was arrested. I saw a waitress twerking upside down in the well, she slipped and landed face first on the tile and was unconscious for about 20 seconds.

I saw a kitchen worker slice her hand while cutting lemons – blood everywhere. She wrapped it in a towel and continued cutting the lemons with the same knife.

She put the finished lemons in the fridge then went for medical attention. I saw a brawl in the craps pit that ended with a mostly naked woman riding piggy-back on the cop that tried to break up the fight.

She was arrested and the rest of the brawlers escaped to the parking garage where the fight continued. Last I saw, another semi-naked woman was hanging on to the hood of a car as it drove away, slamming her shoe on the windshield.

That was a fun job.

“Then he picks it up and just hurls it into the pool.”

Saw a guy once get out of our pool, he dries off and is carrying his pool noodle. He does the look around, sees he’s alone, then starts smacking it against the floor.

He folded it in half and then starts punching it. He then twists it and tries to punt it. It untwists and flops to the ground so he missed. He goes to pick it up, doesn’t get a good grip, stands up and it’s not in his hand.

Picks it up, tries to punt it again, flops to the floor as he missed again. Then he picks it up and just hurls it into the pool.

He stands there for a second, has a look of defeat, goes back into the pool, fishes it out, dries off and proceeds towards the locker room.

“…Then all of a sudden just casually reached into the back of her pants…”

I worked in a supermarket, not as security, but one day stocking shelves my manager and I noticed a strange smell, we couldn’t find the source so we kept working.

A couple of hours later and it was still hanging around, eventually we emptied the last trolley of stock which had been sitting in an aisle for a while (small supermarket) and we found a blob of human poop on a box of cat food, and then two or three more on the shelves next to the trolley.

We checked the cameras and there was this seemingly normal 50 something year old lady, walked in, put a few things in her basket, then started walking / waddling oddly down the pet food aisle and then all of a sudden just casually reached into the back of her pants, pulled some poop out, chucked it on the stock trolley, walked another few paces and did the same then from memory she even proceeded through the checkout and out of the store.

The manager asked me to clean it up to which I offered my immediate resignation (as a joke, he was my mate but there was no way I was dealing with that) so he had to clean it up and we ended up throwing out a lot of stock and most of the fruit and veg stock.

I’ve told so many people this story, I still find it so bizarre to this day.

“Bathing in the sink.”

I worked as an assistant manager at a grocery retailer. The store was closing and there were a few employees left. I’m finishing paperwork and happen to look up at the monitor displaying 16 different cameras.

The one in the deli caught my eye because I happened to notice the deli employee filling a sink.

Didn’t think anything of it and kept on going with my work. Looked at the time and was thinking, okay everyone should be out. Look through the cameras and see the girl in the deli…

Bathing in the sink.

The dread comes over me. What… What do I do…

I wait until she’s done, burn the video, sterilize the sink, bleach the sink, pour boiling water over the sink, and scrub it until my hands hurt, then leave the store in night crews hands.

Next morning, speak with the store manager and show him the video.

Pull the girl upstairs and let her go for violating all sorts of health and safety violations.

Turns out, her water was turned off and she needed to bathe for her date…

With her parole officer the next morning.

Things people do when they think others aren’t watching.

“When I came around the corner, there was a girl completely naked…”

I was working the desk at a gym in a large sports facility that was connected to a high school. There is one section that shows a hallway known as ‘Trojan alley’ because of all the high school kids who went around a corner and had relations.

One day I see a foot kinda sticking out from around the corner kind of twitching. I thought a member of the facility had fallen or had a seizure or something.

So I grabbed a first aid kit and ran over. When I came around the corner, there was a girl completely naked with her laptop open and filming herself messing around alone.

She slammed the laptop shut, grabbed her clothes and stood up very embarrassed. I was equally embarrassed. Neither of us said anything. I just turned around and went back to my desk and I’m assuming she left.

I feel bad because that must have been so scarring yet I legitimately thought there was a medical emergency so I was very thrown off as well.

“… In the center of an ice rink, naked, with nowhere to go.”

I worked in IT for a resort that had an ice rink. Two guests decided to bone in the middle of said rink at like 1 in the morning. Thing is, those cameras are motion detecting because it’s dangerous.

Security office immediately gets an alarm if they detect anything. So Security had to go up there while they were mid-act and ask them to not… Unfortunately, their situation had placed them in the center of an ice rink, naked, with nowhere to go.

Security had to watch as they carefully and awkwardly put their clothes back on and removed themselves from the rink.

“… He leaned the cane against the rail and started to practice…”

A middle-aged man who always walked with a cane got into an elevator at the end of the day. Fairly big elevators. The guy was always nice but pretty unseemly.

After he got in the elevator, however, he leaned the cane against the rail and started to practice what looked like (and I later checked with a friend) a taekwondo form.

When he heard the elevator ding at a floor to stop, he grabbed the cane, went back to his demeanor and walked out.

I found out later that the guy worked in a dangerous profession and makes himself seem weak.

I’d be terrified to mess with that guy.

“… What took the cake is one morning around maybe 7-8 AM…”

My old job was on a busy boulevard with an alley in the back. We had an open garage with access to said alley.

We used to often catch people doing weird acts, doing/selling stimulants, guys urinating, even saw one couple take turns relieving themselves beside our AC unit…

But what took the cake is one morning around maybe 7-8 AM a man was walking by through the alley, stops suddenly, goes into our garage, lights a candle, and sets it there by the wall and walks away.

It was so odd getting there and seeing a randomly lit candle. Checking the footage only left us with more questions.

“In this video, a guy takes his streetwalker…”

I hang out with our security guard a lot and spend time in their office at our hotel messing with them. There’s footage saved that they show to our new hire guards to see if they can handle things professionally.

In this video, a guy takes his streetwalker (a $100 an hour one, super dirty and cheap) and takes her into an alley by a function room where we had a camera.

They get to it, and he straight away pulls down her pants and starts to eat her butt. This goes on for five minutes or so until you see the door open behind them, and our HUGE Polynesian guard standing behind the guy.

The lady runs off laughing instantly, leaving her poor client to put on his pants and clean up by himself

“Sure enough around 3:30 am I noticed some movement by one of the fences.”

I worked at a car dismantler and people would break in and steal catalytic converters, radiators, and other valuables.

I noticed a pattern of break-ins on Wednesday mornings around 4 am.

So, one day I decided to catch the perp. I locked myself into the office around midnight, called up the local PD and explained to them what I was doing.

Sure enough around 3:30 am I noticed some movement by one of the fences.

I watched him cut a hole in the fence and start to wander around. He started to stash things by the hole. I called the cops and told them what was going on, but asked them to hold off on arresting him until he was outside the fence.

I watched as five cars pulled up in the parking lot next door. The perp pushed the stuff through the fence and I told the dispatcher OK, now get him!

They caught him and arrested him.

The reason I wanted to wait till he was outside is that it was then burglary and trespassing. If they had arrested him inside it would only be trespassing because he hadn’t left the premises with the parts.

I later got a letter of commendation from the chief of police.

“The owner just screams NOT THOSE TWO AGAIN!”

Not me, but a story from somebody who helped set up remote logins for a security company.

He was on a remote session with this one local bar. Typically normal but he wanted this whole suite of cameras, a lot more than what he thought was normal.

Going through the entire process of setting up the equipment, testing the DVR and having the owner walk through every cam. Now on the phone going over some information and the final checks my friend notices some people slip in through the back.

Since it is the middle of the day just as the bar is about to open he assumes they are employees. Then these two guys just start going at it. Shell-shocked at the brazenness of it he just kinda stares for about 30 seconds.

Now the owner notices my friend isn’t responding and asks what is wrong. He finally tells him ‘uhh there are two guys in the first floor back hallway…ugh just having relations.’

The owner just screams ‘NOT THOSE TWO AGAIN’ and bolted from his office. My friend watches the owner run full sprint from his office through the bar towards the back hallway.

They must have heard him as they start pulling up their pants. Just as he arrives they bolt out the door and he chucks his phone at them full force.

Of course, now the owner has just destroyed his phone and cut the call.

“We put grease there.”

I worked at a thrift store. We had a furniture storage semi-trailer out back where people would also drop off donations during the day. It was so common for people to break into the trailer we just stopped locking it.

It’s a thrift store and we never prosecuted because frankly it just wasn’t worth it. One day me and a couple of guys decided if they want to violate our property we’ll make it a bit more enjoyable for them.

We rigged up a bucket of water on top of the semi-door and tied it so it would fall when the door was opened. Then we also had a big dumpster there that was regularly looked through so we put a couch up against the dumpster positioned in a way that there was only one obvious place to put your hands when you climbed up the dumpster.

We put grease there.

For us working at the thrift store and never getting revenge on the countless thieves it was an enjoyable experience to watch their plans fall apart for at least one night.

“I caught the door slowly opening by itself!”

I worked security at a large hotel chain. Part of my job was to keep track of storage room visits, by kitchen staff and other employees. There was a camera watching the big metal door of the storage room.

One day as I returned to my office I noticed the storage room door was open, which was odd because only I had keys for it and I hadn’t opened it that day.

I checked the camera and on film I caught the door slowly opening by itself! No one was there and no way the wind could unlock a heavy metal door. Showed my boss and he told me not to mention it.

Although word got out and some of the more superstitious employees avoided the storage room. There had been 2 suicides that previous year, some said it was related to them.

Whoa. Just whoa.

I never want to be a security guard ever.

Never ever.

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15 Students Share the One Detention That Was Totally Worth It

Few things terrify kids more than one word: detention.

Not only will their parents know they screwed up, but now they have to go sit in a room and basically do nothing. Well, besides homework. And that’s if you’re lucky. Some detentions are completely silent. Those are definitely the shittiest.

But sometimes when revenge is involved… those detentions just fly by.

Here are 15 stories of students who got back on those who had wronged them, and didn’t mind serving the time because they definitely did the crime.

1. “Because she couldn’t hold a pencil.”

I beat the crap out of a boy twice my size in 3rd grade for teasing my friend – another girl who was severely physically handicapped, in a motorized wheelchair, who had to use a computer to type because she couldn’t hold a pencil.

School had a no-tolerance policy for fighting – the principal said he understood why I did what I did but next time not to fight on school grounds…so the next time it was at a playground near the lake.

I didn’t get in trouble for that one, though the police were called.

2. “I was never bullied again after that…”

After being bullied a lot between the ages of 8-14, I finally snapped as I was ‘walking away’ from a bully and he said, ‘Keep rolling, fatboy,’ in front of a girl I liked.

I turned around in a blinding anger and hit him so hard that I broke a few bones on my hand, and his nose, He fell back and landed in a puddle of mud and started crying.

Fast forward to sitting outside the headteachers office after I was reported for fighting, and out walks my favorite teacher, who apparently saw the whole thing and argued in my corner, meaning the only punishment I got was a weeks of lunchtime detentions.

I was never bullied again after that incident and I just wish I had done it sooner.

3. “During the next class, she wouldn’t leave me alone.”

A teacher in our chemistry class had been acting aggressive and bullying towards students all year. If anyone asked for help, she would always call that person a condescending name or something.

At one point, I literally heard her say to a student: ‘I don’t give a (censored) when you get your homework in!’ and at another point she accused me of trying to tell her how to do her job after requesting more time to do homework.

Yeah, half the time her insults and accusations weren’t even related to what was going on.

She seemed to especially target me, and one day we got into a major argument over a late homework. I was feeling rather guilty for some of the things I’d said in the heat of the moment and went to apologize to her during lunchtime.

She asked me what I was apologizing for and I said I wasn’t sure but I’d clearly annoyed her and was sorry for it, and she basically told me to bugger off and leave her alone.

During the next class, she wouldn’t leave me alone.

Every two seconds she was going, ‘Are you doing work or just daydreaming,’ ‘Turn to the same page in your books as the rest of the class,’ ‘Are you even listening?’

Eventually I get sick of it and finally call her on her crap: ‘Okay now you’re just being condescending.’

She goes into a fury, spends a full five minutes berating me and sends me out of the class, telling me to wait outside.

Half an hour later she comes out, asks me what I was thinking, and accuses me of being, and I quote, ‘out to get her.’ I try to defend myself and she says, ‘Okay, you can return to my class now, sit down in your chair and not say a WORD to me for the rest of the year.

Or, if you want to argue with me, you can gather your stuff, get out of my class and not come back.’

I told her I DID in fact want to argue with her, that she was being totally unfair, then went inside, left, and went straight to the head of school to tell him everything that had happened.

Long story short I was in the very next lesson with her and she didn’t do a thing against me for the rest of the year.

She did however move on to bullying another guy in the class who had the same name as me (I wonder if there’s a connection there).

I tried to defend him where I could though and eventually we both managed to be rid of her as we dropped chemistry next year.

4. “I brought an extra change of clothes hidden in my backpack…”

I had a teacher who would not let anyone go to the bathroom the entire year, so the last month of school, my friends and I got so fed up with it, I decided to take action.

I brought an extra change of clothes hidden in my backpack and drank three bottles of water at lunch.

During class that afternoon, I asked the teacher if I could use the restroom, and of course, she responded with the usual ‘no,’ so I said ‘ok’ and just urinated all over myself and the desk.

Since I had an extra change of clothes, it was only uncomfortable for a little bit.

The look on her face was worth it. Now she lets any and everyone go to the bathroom as needed. You’re welcome, America!

Basically, I wet myself during class at school to make a point to the teacher to let people go to the bathroom during class.

5. “At the end of it, everybody stood at the street in front of the school yelling…”

I once instigated a whole revolution in my (Catholic) school.

We had an horrible math teacher that nobody liked, and when he took vacations, they brought a substitute teacher that was really great, so we did a petition with signatures from students of all grades for the school to keep her as the official teacher.

I was the head of the movement, so I went to the principal with the ‘document’ to show our efforts. She laughed at me and told to get out of because students don’t have the right to demand such things.

I went back to class crying (7th grade) and my classmates became really angry that the principal had treated me like that so everybody got out of the class, started to call the other students in all classes to join then and they did.

At the end of it, everybody stood at the street in front of the school yelling that the principal was a jerk.

I was in serious trouble after that but totally worth it.

6. “GAME OVER! WE WIN! BIGGEST UPSET IN STATE HISTORY! Nope.”

My senior year, our boys basketball team is in the playoffs, playing the number one seed. They were much bigger, faster, and stronger than us. We didn’t have size, but we made up for it with good ball skills, shooting, and defense.

We tie the game with about eight seconds left. As they’re coming down the court with the ball, their point guard dribbles the ball off his foot. It’s about to roll out of bounds when our MVP grabs it and takes it in for the easy lay up just as time expires.

GAME OVER! WE WIN! BIGGEST UPSET IN STATE HISTORY! Nope.

The ref on the opposite base line says our guy kicked the ball and the opposing player in the process.

Their ball, double bonus, we’re effed. The thing is: our guy wasn’t even close and had started retreating to set up a perimeter defense in order to stop penetration and force a longer shot.

HE WASN’T EVEN CLOSE! Of course, everyone goes nuts and there is a meeting among the refs. The original call stands, everyone is booing their faces off, and our coach begins arguing the call with one ref while the kid buries his foul shots.

To top it all off, there was only .3 seconds put back on the clock. The ref says there will be no more extra time and as they are fixing the clock, the chanting starts…

I started this chant earlier in the year.

It goes like this: ‘OATS AND BEANS, AND BEANS AND OATS!’ I know, it makes no sense, but it was different and fun and I was in high school, what can I say?

So I start this chant.

LOUDLY. I’m literally screaming at the top of my lungs. Within about ten seconds, our entire bleachers section is wailing and the students all come as close to court side as possible with me, and start screaming, ‘OATS AND BEANS, AND BEANS AND OATS!’

It was so loud that no one could communicate on the court.

Imagine about four hundred people at the top of their lungs, in a high school gymnasium. Then, our bench players start in!

It was epic! The refs keep trying to wave us off and are blowing their whistles like wild, so they can confirm the clock is right and/or game is over.

The ref in question turns to the scoreboard guy and gives a ‘THAT’S IT!’ type of motion. We’re still going nuts with ‘oats and beans.’ The refs are trying to leave the court and our bench stands up to block the entrance to the locker room.

We storm the court, surround them, just screaming ‘oats and beans, beans and oats!’ as loud as we can. They push through us and into the locker room.

It didn’t stop there.

About a hundred students followed them into the locker room, ‘oats and beans-ing’ it all the way. We followed that jerk out to his car and never stopped.

He ‘retired’ after that season.

I was suspended for three days for inciting a riot after the guy threatened to press charges for ‘psychological abuse.’

The best part: the superintendent of the district comes to my house on the last day of my suspension.

My parents were angry, but I was a senior, good student, and already accepted into college, so I didn’t get it too bad. The superintendent goes on to sit us all down and tell us how lucky I was that there wouldn’t likely be legal repercussions and whatever.

I go to my room so he can talk to my parents alone, then my mom calls me back down to say goodbye. He shakes my mom’s hand, my dad’s hand, then mine and says, ‘Son, you’re going to change the world.’

At the end of the year, I was given a $2000 ‘spirit’ scholarship and the entire school chanted ‘OATS AND BEANS, AND BEANS AND OATS!’

when they announced my name at graduation. It was amazing and made everything worth it.

7. “I relished in the look of her disgust…”

I went to a K-8 Catholic school. Our school lunches were pitifully small, same portion for 1st graders, as for 8th graders.

The lunch ladies understood that the portions were small and would often let students get second servings, which they were otherwise going to throw out.

I went to get some extra salad. Rather than giving me an additional serving, they just gave me the remaining, heaping mound of cheap iceberg lettuce drenched in Italian dressing. It was seriously probably several pounds of salad.

I had no intention of eating the entirety of it, but a teacher caught me eating the leftovers and said I had ought to finish it otherwise it would be so wasteful.

At that point it became a competition to prove her wrong. I had to stay probably an extra 10 minutes to finish munching down the pile of salad. When I finished, the teacher called me a pig and gave me a detention anyway.

I relished in the look of her disgust and gleefully took the detention.

8. “I could feel the chair vibrate under me…”

I was in class in high school and a female student asked to go to the restroom. The teacher replied, ‘No, that’s what passing period is for,’ and didn’t let her go.

This ticked me off something terrible, because the student was a girl and might have had women issues, so I came up with a plan.

I held all of my farts for a whole day until the next class with this terrible teacher.

Being on the football team and on a high protein diet, it was very hard, but I did it. When I got to the class, I waited about 5 minutes and asked to go to the bathroom, I received the same snide remark, so I bent over as much as I could and let go the loudest, longest fart in my whole life.

I could feel the chair vibrate under me and the whole class burst into laughter.

I was immediately sent to the office which was great for me, because I’m sure it smelled like a dead whale that had been beached for a month.

I received five days of in-school suspension for farting in class, and had to do extra workouts for missing football practice. It was worth it.

9. “Our principal’s attempt at therapy didn’t work.”

To make a long story short, there was this girl who was a complete jerk, bully, and overall horrible to me. One day, after years of harassment, I took a permanent marker and drew all over her sweater, arms, and face.

This prompted a week’s worth of detention, but she didn’t get off scot-free though.

The faculty knew that this was a long time coming and gave her detention as well. This, however, meant that the two of us spent a week of our school year sitting in the office with the principal, talking about our issues.

I also had to pay for half the price of the sweater, which was pretty expensive, especially to a elementary-schooler.

Our principal’s attempt at therapy didn’t work.

We still openly hated each other, but the week of detention and the money was all worth it because she never harassed me again. Instead, it turned into a cold war.

She knew that if she ever poked me hard enough again that I wouldn’t be afraid retaliate with nuclear fury, like I had done before.

Needless to say, it stopped a lot of the other bullies from messing with me too. Being the runt of the class, the remainder of elementary school was rather relaxing.

10. “I started running as fast as I could straight at him…”

When I was in 4th grade, this annoying 3rd grader kept messing with me. He would run up behind me and try to knock me down all the time. Especially since he was just a 3rd grader that was trying to bully me, it ticked me off, and I decided to end it before it got out of control.

I saw him standing there doing nothing like an idiot one day at recess and remembered how much he had been bothering me.

I started running as fast as I could straight at him from across the play ground, and knocked him flat on his back. He got up and tackled me, and we rolled around on the ground wrestling for a little while before one of the recess monitors saw us.

I got in trouble and had to write, ‘I will not fight’ or something like that 25 times during one recess. He never bothered me again after that, though.”

11. “The class was silent for a few seconds…”

I had this witch of an English teacher in 9th grade who had a horrible temper and would always victimize boys for no reason. One day she gave some vague instructions and the class just looking at her puzzled.

She said, ‘Don’t look at me like I’m naked!’

The class was silent for a few seconds until I covered my mouth as if I was about to cough and spouted, ‘Gross!’

The class erupted with laughter and I got a week of detention. After the first day, an assistant principal found out about the situation and called off the rest of my detention.

12. “One day she picked on the fat kid sitting next to me…”

I got kicked out of class for making a substitute teacher cry.

For background, the teacher was horrible with the class. She told students they were dumb, talked down to them, and was all around just not good for a healthy educational environment.

For example, we once watched a movie on space exploration and and after part one, I talked to her about how we could just put bubble structures on a planet with an atmosphere.

Put plants in there, slowly expand and increase until they covered the whole planet. She laughed at me, told the class how this would never work and continued with lesson plans.

The next day, we watched part two of the film and it went over the idea of terraforming using structures where they gradually increase size of structures to alter the planet to make it inhabitable…

Sure, they also said it would take an extremely one time and be super costly so not a very viable option, but nevertheless I felt vindicated.

Anyway, one day she picked on the fat kid sitting next to me and I lost my cool.

I stood up from my desk and proceeded to berate her, telling her that she shouldn’t be allowed to shape the minds of children, that she was awful at her job and how I truly believe she should look into another occupation.

After some choice verbal jabs, I got sent to the office.

After I left, she burst into tears. I feel my outburst was justified.

13. “I found out two years later that the bully of a gym teacher was fired from his job…”

I was in 8th grade and our gym teacher picked one student per class to make his personal slave. I wasn’t having any of it, so everything he tried I was able to one up him.

The final straw was when we were throwing frisbees and he threw one at me. At the last second he said ‘Heads up!’ expecting me to get hit in the face.

I don’t know it happened but without looking I grabbed it, spun around and whipped it back at him fast enough and hard enough to give him a bloody nose when it cracked him square in the face.

He sent me to the principal’s office where she while laughing her butt off about it, but she had to give me a three-day suspension due to ‘attacking a teacher.’

I found out two years later that the bully of a gym teacher was fired from his job due to multiple students, from several years, coming forward and claiming physical and verbal abuse.

So it was totally worth it to get that bully out of teaching.”

14. “…Held up a brazen middle finger, and walked inside, ignoring his demands that I stop.”

In high school, my dad dropped me off out front after all the buses had left. The vice-principal was being a jerk for no reason and giving my dad trouble for ‘parking’ in a bus lane (when in fact he had not violated any rules).

It was clear the VP was trying to pick a fight. After a brief heated exchange, my dad drove off, and I heard the VP mutter ‘scumbag’ under his breath.

I stood in front of the building, waited for the VP to turn around and see me, held up a brazen middle finger, and walked inside, ignoring his demands that I stop.

I proceeded to dodge detention until I was pulled from class.

Basically, I flipped off vice principal in front of the school. Felt great.

15. “So I had taken my belt off as some sort of make-shift weapon…”

Some kid was stealing money out of the locker rooms every day after school while sports teams were practicing. I skipped cross-country practice one day and hid in the shower area in an attempt to catch them.

After waiting for over an hour, I finally heard someone enter.

I didn’t know what I would be up against, so I had taken my belt off as some sort of make-shift weapon (just made me feel safer). I hear the sound of velcro separating, and I knew I had finally caught him.

I ran out to the locker area, and he flung the wallet in his hands away and immediately pretended to be opening a lock on the locker. The culprit was this tiny 8th grader (our junior high was connected to our high school).

As he sat there fumbling with a lock, I just stood and waited.

Finally, when it was clear to him that he wasn’t fooling me, and that he didn’t know the combination of the locker he was trying to open, he looked up at me.

I started yelling at him, telling him how many people wanted to kick his behind. The wallet he was opening was one of my friends, who was in open gym nearby.

I told him to wait there unless he wanted trouble, and got my friend.

Ultimately, we started trying to extort the money he had stolen over the last few weeks with threats, because we were concerned that if we turned him in we wouldn’t see a dime.

Finally the kid turned himself in, because he didn’t have any of the money left, nor a way to make the money, and was legitimately concerned we were going to hurt him.

The discipline lady said something I’ll never forget, ‘you just can’t do that.

I’m glad you did, but you can’t take the law into your own hands. I’m sorry, but I’ve got to give you detention for this.’ She asked why I didn’t turn him in, so I answered her honestly.

She asked us to get a list together, and made his parents pay up. All-in-all, totally worth it!

Basically, I caught a kid stealing and extorted money from him rather than turning him in.

I wish I had a story as good as any of these, but I don’t. I was such a good kid back in the day.

What happened?! ?

The post 15 Students Share the One Detention That Was Totally Worth It appeared first on UberFacts.