A Waitress Asked if She Was a Jerk for Refusing to Return a Tip to a Customer

Waiters and waitresses really have to put up with a lot of bullsh*t, don’t they?

The folks who work in the back of the house in restaurants have their own sets of problems, but those who are out front and center have to deal with all the drama from customers…and you better believe that there is plenty of it.

A waitress shared a story on Reddit’s “Am I the *sshole?” page about dealing with certain customers that frankly sounds like kind of a nightmare.

Let’s take a look.

AITA for refusing to return a tip AND telling a couple that I don’t have time to play mediator?

“I’m a 22 year old, female waitress at Texas Roadhouse. This is one of my two jobs to put myself through college. Most days are fine but other days are a living hell.

Yesterday I was assigned a table that had a husband, wife and what appeared to be a teenage daughter (maybe 17). Everything was going smooth at first and the wife ordered a margarita. The husband then tried ordering a beer. The wife instantly lost her noodles and said “Uh, no. He will not have a beer. He will have a water.”

She then turned to him and said something along the lines of him not needing to drink because he was driving. He said no, the daughter could drive. It was childish.

Anyways, he keeps telling me he wants a beer. She keeps telling me no. In this industry, situations like this are a lose/lose for waitresses. If I get him the beer, wife wont tip. If I dont get him the beer, he wont tip. D*mned if I do, d*mned if I dont. So while they were arguing AT me, I said “Listen, I really dont have time to play mediator here.”

They went silent. I went and got both of them their alcohol. Daughter gives me an apologetic look upon my return, presumably because her mother was acting batsh*t crazy upon seeing me bring a beer in tow.

Flash forward to after their meals. Husband has had 2 beers at this point. Wife has stopped drinking and glares at me everytime I return. Wife and daughter go to the car while husband pays. Husband drops me a $40 tip on a $68 tab. I told him I couldnt accept it. He insisted. Eventually I pocketed it.

Wife comes in an hour or so later demanding that I give her the $40 her husband gave me, stating that I was a terrible host and went against her and I dknt deserve a tip.

She got my manager involved who said “She is not obligated to give you her tip. You left the restaurant and the tip has already been processed. Have a nice night.” She was fuming, screaming at me about how much of an AH I was for supplying her husband alcohol after she said no.

Other guests started chiming in saying that she was being ignorant and that I was doing my job, which is to provide guests with what they want and said that it wasnt MY fault that she was a controlling wife. She storms out.

Given the fact that I was put on the spot like that, I feel insanely guilty. AITA?”

And here’s what people had to say about her story.

One person brought up how bad they feel for the couple’s child.

Photo Credit: Reddit

Another person said the woman did the exact right thing in this strange situation.

Photo Credit: Reddit

This individual said there is absolutely no way the woman was wrong in this situation.

Photo Credit: Reddit

And this person pointed out that she was just doing her job and that she didn’t do anything wrong.

Photo Credit: Reddit

Finally, this Reddit user said that they also feel sorry for the husband in this situation.

The wife sounds like a real treat, huh…?

Photo Credit: Reddit

Now we want to hear from all the readers out there.

Tell us what you think about this situation in the comments.

We look forward to it!

The post A Waitress Asked if She Was a Jerk for Refusing to Return a Tip to a Customer appeared first on UberFacts.

Am I a Jerk for Being Mad at My Husband Who Was Going to Give $10,000 to His Sister Without Asking Me? Here’s What People Said.

When money gets involved in any situation, things can go off the rails in a hurry.

And this story is a doozy.

A woman shared her story on the “Am I the *sshole” forum on Reddit to ask the readers there if she was wrong for getting mad at her husband for going behind her back to give a family member A LOT of money.

Here’s how it all went down…

AITA For being mad at my husband who was going to give away $10,000 to his sister without even asking me about it?

“On Saturday morning, I noticed my husband was sending a lot of text messages back and forth. He is usually not much of a texter. He left the phone next to me to charge while he as in the other room.

The phone kept lighting up with text messages when I decided to open it up to see what the big discussion was about.

I know some couples view it as big breach of trust to read through a significant other’s phone, but my husband and I do it regularly so this was not a huge invasion of privacy on my end. We both have nothing to hide and it has never been an issue before.

Anyway, of course I saw something on the phone that I shouldn’t have that got me upset. For background, my husband is 34, I am 32, and his sister is 31 (she’s in this story). Husband and I have been together for 10 years, married for the last four years.

We are all college educated with jobs now. My husband and I each make good salaries around $150k each. We own our house. I still have about $60,000 in student loans I am working to pay off (luckily low interest rates so I just pay the minimum).

We have about $40k liquid in savings. So we are doing good financially but still need to build up more savings as we will probably try to start a family in the next 1-2 years and want to be prepared for an emergency and have a rainy day fund. Anyway, my husband’s sister is trying to buy a 1 bedroom apartment in NYC.

I saw in the text messages that my husband offered to give her $10,000 for her down payment. The money is our savings is OUR money. Our bank accounts are 100% combined. My husband manages 99% of the finances because I prefer not to deal with it. However, it is understood we consult each other regularly on major purchases.

He did not ask me if I was OK with him giving this money to his sister. She didn’t ask, he offered. I immediately confronted him (calmly) and was like, “Hey – Did you tell your sister you would give her $10,000?” He said yes. I asked him when he was going to tell me.

He said, he probably wasn’t. He figured I wouldn’t notice and said he didn’t think I would care about “the details”. I said, “Um, do you think $10,000 is a detail?” He said, “No, that is lot of money. I should have told you about it. Are you OK with it?” I said, “No, I don’t think I am.”

Anyway we decided in that moment not to give the money. He said he would tell his sister and she would understand. He wanted the issue to go away after that.

But I am still mad. I said this was a big breach of trust. I let him control all finances because I trust him to never, ever take advantage of my ignorance. Shouldn’t you be able to trust your husband?

So now, I don’t have that full amount of trust I had before and I want to open my own bank account (which frankly, I should have anyway). But AITA for being totally upset and feeling betrayed about this?

I grew up poor and $10,000 is a ton of money to me (I mean, to most people right?!). I am horrified he would consider gifting it away and not even telling me.

Wow…let’s see what folks on Reddit said about this.

This person didn’t think the woman was wrong at all for being angry at her husband.

Photo Credit: Reddit

Another person made a good point: what else has her husband done with their money…?

Photo Credit: Reddit

Another reader called the husband’s actions “a lie by omission”, and I think they’re right about that.

Photo Credit: Reddit

This Reddit user called it “financial infidelity.” I’ve never heard that one before…

Photo Credit: Reddit

And finally, this reader said that $10,000 is a huge chunk of money and that the woman and her husband might want to think about getting separate accounts after this incident because there are clearly some trust issues here…

Photo Credit: Reddit

Now we want to get your take on the situation.

Do you think this woman was justified in her anger or did she overreact?

Tell us what you think in the comments.

The post Am I a Jerk for Being Mad at My Husband Who Was Going to Give $10,000 to His Sister Without Asking Me? Here’s What People Said. appeared first on UberFacts.

Person Calls Off Wedding After His Partner Nearly Gets His Pooch Killed

This is one of those posts where just reading the headline seems like it’s enough information to make a decision. Anyone who isn’t responsible for a beloved pet – or careful with the life of any animal, to be honest – isn’t the kind of person I’d want to spend my life with.

Sometimes the devil is in the details, though, so let’s hear these before we make a final call.

It began when OP (original poster) left his dog home with his fiancee during her bachelorette party.

He says he specifically told her to put the dog away in the bedroom once the party got going.

Me (28M) and fiancee (27F) have been together for 4 years, engaged for 6 months. I also have a 7 year-old lab mix who is the greatest dog in existence.

On Saturday, fiancee had a bachelorette party at home. I stayed with my parents but I left the dog with her because she likes having him there. However, I made sure to tell her to put the dog in our bedroom once the party gets going.

The next morning, OP got a frantic call that something was wrong with the dog. They both raced to the emergency vet, where she was clearly upset and her friends told him the dog was alive but sick.

5am on Sunday I get a frantic call that something’s wrong with the dog. She was drunk, so I told her to get a taxi and go to the emergency vet clinic. When I got there, she looked like she hadn’t stopped crying for hours and she couldn’t even speak.

Two of her friends were there so they told me my dog is alive but not well. I felt sorry for her for an entire 10 minutes while waiting for the doctor.

Then the doctor informed them the dog was sick because it had gotten into substantial amounts of both edibles and alcohol – they had failed to lock him up or watch him after they’d started drinking.

But then, the doctor told me my dog ingested large amounts of alcohol and chocolate edibles. The girls apparently thought it would be cool to leave everything out on short coffee tables, leave the dog to wander around instead of putting him in our bedroom, and then get wasted and not notice he was going to town with the booze and edibles.

At home, he told her to get out and that it was over, which she did.

Her friends and family think he’s nuts to end a 4-year relationship over a mistake, but also, they weren’t very nice about it.

When we got home, I told my fiancee to pack and get out of my house and my life. I told her to tell her guests the wedding is off, and I’ll tell mine. She was shocked, but she took her things and left.

2 hours later, I get bombarded by messages on Messenger, Whatsapp, by her sisters, brother, brother’s wife, her mom, her friends, telling me that I am insane to do this to her after 4 years. They started off defending her, but it quickly turned into insulting me.

And get this – his family agrees.

The dog is fine, so everyone thinks he should just forgive and forget, and his best man admitted that OP might have overreacted.

The logical thing for me to do was look for comfort in my friends and family. Nope. They all fucking agree. My mom said: “Well, it was a mistake, she didn’t do it on purpose, besides – the dog didn’t die!” Lucky me, eh? My dog didn’t fucking die!

My sister was appalled that I cancelled the wedding “over that?!” and even my best man said I might have overreacted. Yes, our relationship has had ups and downs, but it’s mostly worked fine. But I am so disgusted at my fiancee that I can’t even imagine looking her in the eye, let alone spending my whole life with her. She isn’t fucking 17, she is 27!

The thing is, this isn’t the first time he’s thought her actions were immature, and he worries that someone will eventually get hurt for real.

By the way, this is not the first dumb thing she has done. She likes to text while driving, she always leaves stuff on the electric stove (like kitchen towels, the cutting board etc.) even though she has turned on the wrong burner and burnt whatever was on it several times in the past, and similar DANGEROUS things. It’s not something I hold against her in the sense that I would ever mention in a fight, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t worried that she might end up killing herself or someone else. For example, my dog.

I’m 99% sure I will stand by my decision. But am I really an asshole? Literally nobody is on my side and I have no idea what to think.

He edited the post to add that he’s realized maybe it’s not about the dog at all, or at least, not just about the dog.

Posting here kind of triggered me to conclude this isn’t about the dog at all. She is negligent and irresponsible and I don’t want to stick around and possibly see our child die in a car accident some day because she was texting or she forgot to put his seat belt on. I’d rather be an asshole now than spend years of my life worrying every time our child is left alone with her.

If she’d accidentally killed a person while texting and driving, I would also leave her. I guess I realized I don’t want to spend my life with someone who has such blatant disregard for human (or animal) life.

But what did the general public have to say about his hardline approach?

Here we go!

This person pointed out that if you’re in a relationship with someone who means less to you than your pet, it’s probably not the right person for you.

Image Credit: Reddit

Plenty of people think Everyone Sucks Here because OP isn’t taking responsibility for his own poor decision to leave the dog there in the first place.

Image Credit: Reddit

They really don’t seem well-suited.

Image Credit: Reddit

They also suggested that if OP wants to avoid judgement, perhaps he shouldn’t divulge the details of their breakup.

Image Credit: Reddit

And yeah, a few people thought OP was way harsh, Tai.

Image Credit: Reddit

I’m still on the side of OP, because he has very good reasons for ending it, but I do think he probably could have been more considerate about it.

What do you think? Let’s hash it out in the comments!

The post Person Calls Off Wedding After His Partner Nearly Gets His Pooch Killed appeared first on UberFacts.

A Dad Asked if He’s Wrong to Still Cook Bacon in the House With His Vegan Daughter

More and more people are making different dietary choices lately – whether it’s for health reasons, because of a concern for the environment, or over moral objections – and many of those changes mean no longer eating meat (or any animal byproducts, in the case of vegans).

If you know a passionate vegan, there’s a good chance you also know many of them are not quiet about their choices, or about trying to convince you to make the same ones. Everyone has to decide for themselves, though, and what’s the best course of action when people who take different paths still live together under one roof?

That’s the question this bacon-loving father is asking now that his daughter is a practicing vegan.

Dad here, old fart, loves his daughter to pieces but I’m struggling to see eye to eye with my teenager and wife on this one.

As a Midwestern family, their meals have always revolved around meat and potatoes, but when his daughter decided to become a vegan, he jumped on board to help her make the switch.

We’ve always been a meat eating family, we live in the rural Midwest and bacon for breakfast is pretty much a given. This year my 14 y/o daughter decided to go vegan, and I jumped onto her support team with enthusiasm. We learned how to substitute ingredients, cook new things, try new things, I adjusted our budget to include more expensive vegan substitutes for her, etc.

Then, there was an incident with a pan.

None of this has been a problem for me until recently. She saw me cook bacon in a pan, and then I rinsed it out to load in the dishwasher. She exploded in anger (teen years, I’m not too fussed about the anger explosion, I know she doesn’t mean it) and said that that was HER pan for vegan food. I was completely floored and said, kiddo this here is a family pan, older than you, it’s not YOUR pan.

She asked for pans to be specifically designated for cooking vegan, and he agreed.

She asked me to purchase her a pan that she can solely use for vegan food. I didn’t want her to feel weird about food, so I said sure, and ordered her a few colored ones that are only for her. The reason they’re colored is so it helps me remember that I’m not to touch them unless I’m cooking vegan.

That wasn’t enough, though, and then she asked that they all stop eating meat at home to stop the cross-contamination.

That wasn’t good enough. Now apparently the dishwasher is ‘contaminated’ with animal product, and the fridge has ‘bacon grease fingers’ on it (because I eat bacon and then touch the fridge) and she’s asked me and her mom to completely stop eating meat at home. I don’t mean I literally touch the fridge with greasy bacon hands, because I wash my hands, but it’s clearly enough that it upsets my daughter.

He and his wife disagree on how to handle it – she thinks that they should make their daughter comfortable in her own kitchen while he says he’s not going to stop enjoying the things he loves in his own house.

frankly I’m on team hell no, her mom is much more amenable and strongly wants me to consider taking our daughter up on the request. My wife’s reasoning is that both our parents live close so we can eat meat products there, and that she doesn’t want our daughter to feel uncomfortable in the kitchen.

My daughter says she is fine with cheese and butter in the fridge, but it’s specifically meat products that make her feel sick. Now I’m sorry for her, but I feel like she just needs to adapt and live side by side, because I’m not going to stop eating bacon in my own house.

Look out, folks – here come the comments.

Mostly, people believe more compromises can be made so that everyone can continue to eat what they want.

image Credit: Reddit

Others suggested the daughter needs a (kind) reality check about all of the ways the world is not going to change to accommodate her.

Image Credit: Reddit

And yeah, learning to cohabitate with people who don’t share each and every one of your beliefs is one of life’s necessary lessons.

Image Credit: Reddit

Other vegans weighed in, and they were surprisingly on the father’s side on this one.

Image Credit: Reddit

“Feeling sick” is something she’s definitely just going to have to get over.

Image Credit: Reddit

I’m definitely with the dad here – it’s his house, he pays the bills, he eats what he likes. Sure, it’s great that he’s willing to support his daughter, but he also needs to teach her that living with other people will always involve compromise.

What do you think? Let’s hash it out in the comments!

The post A Dad Asked if He’s Wrong to Still Cook Bacon in the House With His Vegan Daughter appeared first on UberFacts.

Was This Woman Wrong for Telling Her Cousin the Truth About Her Heritage?

Most people are curious about where they came from – their ancestors, the timeline of events, names and places, that sort of thing. I image that being Native American, part of that curiosity is a bit of duty to carry on a culture that now belongs to far too few.

This family is Native American. The grandfather was part of the Sioux, tribe, and had two sons. Those sons each had a daughter, who are one-quarter Native American…or so they both thought.

OP, who is very light-skinned and doesn’t “look Native,” is actually the only one who is because her cousin’s father was not her grandfather’s by blood.

My (18f) grandfather was a full blooded Sioux Native American. He had two sons, my dad and my uncle. My uncle had a daughter named K (17). All of them except me are very dark skinned. My mom is a white lady, which turned out to be the dominant gene for me, so I am quite light skinned.

My dad is half Native American, and I am a quarter. K however, isn’t at all because of family drama surrounding her dad that K was never told about.

As they spent time together in the tribe, getting to know about their family and heritage, the cousin grew openly hostile about OP’s light skin, claiming she was an embarrassment to their culture and had no right to be there.

As we got older my dad and uncle wanted us to become more integrated with what is left of our tribe so we would visit Grandpa’s extended family often. We would go together in one car and every single time she would get pissed and throw a tantrum about me coming.

K was horrible to me about it every time and would tell me how stupid I am and how I’m an “ugly white bitch”. My dad and uncle always just brushed it off and I just had bite my tongue and take it.

Finally, after the cousin claimed she would refuse any more visits with their Sioux relatives if her “white” cousin was along for the ride, OP snapped and told her cousin the hard truth.

Things finally came to a head two weeks ago when she stopped us at the door and said she will not be going under any circumstances if I am also going.

K said that I am an embarrassment to our family and to the tribe because of how light skinned I am, and that my dad is a racist towards his own people for letting me be apart of this culture. This was the first time she had ever said anything like this where they could hear it, and I finally snapped. I was done letting this girl bully me, so I told her the truth about her heritage.

The story of her uncle’s parentage tumbled out, and her cousin lost her mind. Her aunt disowned OP and her father in the process, claiming her daughter was now having an identity crisis.

Her own father chastised her because it’s not her story to tell, but understands that she’s frustrated at being the one treated as not good enough all of these years.

I told her that she’s actually wrong. I am more Native American than she is because her dad isn’t Sioux AT ALL. My grandmother had an affair with the neighbor (he was Mexican) and kept the baby. Grandpa loved him like a blood son anyways and brought him up the same way he did for my dad, but my uncle was aware the entire time he is an “honorary Indian” (his words not mine).

K absolutely lost the plot and has completely disowned me and my dads side of the family. I haven’t heard from my uncle and my dad said that wasn’t my story to tell, but he understands why I did it. Grandpas family don’t care, they knew the whole time. K is apparently having a major identity crisis and my uncles wife cussed me out on the phone and she’s also disowned me and my dad.

So, what did the good people of Reddit think?

Let’s find out!

They say the cousin is simply reaping the rewards of years of horrid behavior, for one.

Image Credit: Reddit

This comment just made me chuckle.

Image Credit: Reddit

And yes, her father had years to tell that story himself, and put a stop to the cruelty.

Image Credit: Reddit

I think we can all agree the adults are really at fault, here.

Image Credit: Reddit

And then there’s this mic drop.

Image Credit: Reddit

I guess I agree that OP could have been more tactful, but the adults really should have made sure the pertinent family members were in on the big secret a long time ago – and they also shouldn’t have let racial bullying go on under their noses.

Where do you come down? Hit us with your thoughts in the comments!

The post Was This Woman Wrong for Telling Her Cousin the Truth About Her Heritage? appeared first on UberFacts.

A Person Asked if it Was Wrong to Not Let Her Daughter Introduce Her Black Boyfriend to Her Grandparents

I think this is going to be a very divisive topic and story for a lot of people out there.

And rightfully so, because the headline makes this person seem like a total bigot.

But let’s give them a chance to tell the story for themselves on Reddit “Am I the *sshole” forum, okay?

AITA for telling my daughter she cannot introduce her African American boyfriend to her grandparents?

“Let me just preface this by saying this: I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO PROBLEM WITH INTERRACIAL RELATIONSHIPS. Now that the air is clear, let me continue.

My daughter (Anna) has recently started to date an African American man (Jamal). While I’m not exactly what you would refer to as “liberal”, he’s a nice young man and as long as my daughter is happy, I’m happy. The problem is Anna is rather naive about the community she lives in.

While her friends are quite content to see a relationship like hers, more than a few tongues are wagging in the community and a few people have privately expressed their concern to me. As I said, I have no problem with mixed relationships and I’ve set them straight, but I am painfully aware of how these matters are viewed by certain segments of the population.

My parents are planning to come and stay with us for a week and Anna expressed a desire to introduce Jamal to them now that things were getting more serious between them. I told her on no uncertain terms that this wasn’t going to happen.

I may have no problem with Jamal, but they absolutely will, and even when the relationship ends they won’t forget it. They might even go as far as to cut her off entirely. Anna was extremely upset by this and implied I was a racist and more concerned with what my parents think than how she feels.

As I said, I know my parents. They simply aren’t okay with mixed relationships and if Anna were to bring Jamal over even as a friend, they would be furious both at her and me.

Anna is currently staying with Jamal and doesn’t want to speak with me right now. My wife stands by me given she knows very well how my parents are (they had a problem with her for months over the length of the skirt she wore when I introduced her to them, for christs sake), but a close friend I confided in told me that I have behaved like an *ss and that I needed to focus more on my daughter than pleasing my parents.

No advice needed, but I have to know. Have I been an *ss?”

First of all, this person made a good point that this mother said “when” the relationship ends, and not “if.”

Hmmm. Is that coded language?

Photo Credit: Reddit

This reader got straight the point. Brutally honest!

Photo Credit: Reddit

And this Reddit user pointed out the most important thing: her daughter’s happiness should come first. Period.

Photo Credit: Reddit

This person argued that the mother is to blame because in a way, she’s making the situation all about herself and how it will affect her.

Photo Credit: Reddit

And finally, this individual made a great point about how racism works in our society.

Sorry, Mom, I think you got called out big time by these folks.

Photo Credit: Reddit

Wow…now we want to get your take on this situation.

In the comments, tell us what you think.

We look forward to hearing from you! Thanks!

The post A Person Asked if it Was Wrong to Not Let Her Daughter Introduce Her Black Boyfriend to Her Grandparents appeared first on UberFacts.

Woman Asks if It’s Disrespectful for Not Wanting the Ring Her Fiancé Previously Gave to Someone Else

Let me say right off the bat that giving a woman an engagement ring that you already gave to someone else is not a great move.

I have a hard time believing that any woman out there would be really psyched about that…and that brings us to today’s story!

A woman shared her story on Reddit’s “Am I the *sshole” page about an incident that set her off.

Here’s what she had to say.

AITA for not wanting a ring my fiancé already gave to another girl

“My now fiancé was engaged a couple years before we got together, and they broke up and she gave the ring back.

We’ve been together a few years and a few days ago, he proposed and I was super excited. The ring looked kinda familiar and when I asked him where it was from, he said it was the ring he gave to ex fiancé.

I immediately took it off and was like “I don’t want a ring you bought for someone else, it wasn’t meant for me.” He got upset and said it didn’t matter, because it’s not hers anymore it’s mine.

My family and friends are split in saying I’m the *sshole and I’m justified.

I don’t want him to spend a whole other thousand dollars on a ring for me, but I want a ring that was meant for me, not for someone else.

AITA?”

And the people of Reddit, as they like to do, weighed in with their thoughts.

This person got right to the point.

Photo Credit: Reddit

This Reddit user said that she knew her husband would never do something like that and she let that fact be known loud and clear.

It’s bad juju!

Photo Credit: Reddit

But this person came to the man’s defense and said he just made a mistake and that this incident is not worth breaking up over.

Photo Credit: Reddit

Another person made a great point: rings don’t have to be pricey, but they have to be personal.

Preach!

Photo Credit: Reddit

And this person called the guy’s move “tacky as hell.”

Photo Credit: Reddit

But then another reader weighed in and said that the guy was not in the wrong and that both of them need to reevaluate the whole situation and not let a ring get in the way of their relationship.

Photo Credit: Reddit

Okay, now we want to hear what YOU think about this situation.

In the comments, share your thoughts with us?

Is this woman an *sshole, or is she right on with her feelings?

Thanks in advance!

The post Woman Asks if It’s Disrespectful for Not Wanting the Ring Her Fiancé Previously Gave to Someone Else appeared first on UberFacts.

Was It Bad to Tell My Wife Not to Encourage Our Teenage Daughter to Expect Her Boyfriend to Pay for Everything? People Responded.

Do you think chivalry is dead?

Well, maybe that’s a bit of an exaggeration, but based on what you’re about to read, chivalry could be on the ropes.

Or at least what some folks think of as chivalry, aka “the guy always pays for everything.”

Hey, to each their own, I guess…

But this father clearly has some issues with the whole thing.

Here’s what the guy shared on Reddit’s “Am I the *sshole” page.

AITA for telling my wife it’s not ‘cute’ for her to encourage our teenage daughter to expect her boyfriend to pay for EVERYTHING in their relationship?

“Wife and I have been married 18 years, we have our 16 year old daughter who has been dating a slightly shy/ awkward young man for around 3-4 months now.

He seems very nervous around my daughter and has admitted in a passing comment here and there to my wife and I that he can’t believe she agreed to date him and he thinks she’s way out of his league. He seems very respectful, just shy.

My wife is usually an independent, awesome woman and her ideals align closely with mine particularly in term of feminism and equality. We have both striven to raise our daughter to be as independent and capable as possible.

Since my daughter has been dating this kid my wife has changed considerably and has given our daughter advice that has left me with raised brows more than once.

Some of the advice I’ve heard my wife give is ‘oh it’s cute for boys to pay for everything, especially in your first relationship!’ Or ‘oh honey don’t worry about that, he can pay for you, if he really liked you he would’ and similar.

I’ve tried to balance this out by telling my daughter straight away ‘two people in a partnership should be contributing equally’ and my personal favorite ‘if someone asks if they can take you out to dinner, it’s reasonable to expect them to pay, but if someone asks you to grab dinner with them, it’s reasonable to split the payment’. I figured that would be an easy way for a young person to understand the difference.

However I’ve noticed my daughter becoming more and more entitled with her boyfriends money. They haven’t been anywhere obviously since we’re home but the way she talks about him ‘oh I’ll just ask him to pay for x’ etc leaves a bad taste in my mouth.

She has also flippantly bragged/ mentioned that she gets him to buy gift cards for her etc by mentioning her mother’s advice, i.e. ‘if you really liked me you’d pay for x’

I spoke to my wife privately and told her my concerns, she insists it’s a rite of passage for girls and it’s cute that she should feel a guy is completely spoiling her.

I told her that it’s not cute for her to be thinking it’s acceptable to view relationships as personal ATMS, and my wife became very angry with me and is now calling me an *sshole with a lot of hostility.”

Here’s how people on Reddit responded to his story.

This person was as clear as day: it’s not cute and the man’s wife is to blame.

Photo Credit: Reddit

A woman weighed in with her own opinion and she made a very good point about the overall attitude toward paying for dates.

Photo Credit: Reddit

And then another person made a good point about thinking about if the shoe was on the other foot.

Maybe this whole thing is a little bit outdated…?

Photo Credit: Reddit

This person was short and blunt with their thoughts.

Photo Credit: Reddit

But another Reddit user made a good point about how times have changed and maybe the mother in this story is just feeling nostalgic for the old days.

Photo Credit: Reddit

And, finally, someone talked about how the mentality that men should spoil women all the time is still out there and that a big part of it comes from immaturity.

Photo Credit: Reddit

Okay, readers, now we want to get your opinion?

What do you think of this situation?

Share your thoughts with us in the comments. We look forward to hearing from you!

The post Was It Bad to Tell My Wife Not to Encourage Our Teenage Daughter to Expect Her Boyfriend to Pay for Everything? People Responded. appeared first on UberFacts.

“Was I Wrong to Tell My Childhood Bully (Who Is Transgender) That She Will Always Be the Boy Who Bullied Me?”

Just like you never forget your first kiss, you also never forget the bully (or bullies) that you had to deal with when you were growing up.

And this story of getting bullied has an interesting twist…which you’ll find out about when you keep on reading.

A person opened up on Reddit’s “Am I the *sshole” forum to share their story and ask for feedback.

Let’s take a look.

AITA for I telling my childhood bully (who is MtF transgender) that she will always be the “boy who bullied me”?

“When I was a in middle school, I was viciously bullied by this boy, who I’ll call Z. He spread rumors about me, called me stupid and useless every chance he got, and made school a living hell.

It’s been 12 years, and Z has since come out as MtF transgender. She messaged me over social media and asked to meet up. We went out for coffee, where she apologized for bullying me. It was along the lines of, “I’m sorry for being mean. I was young, and I was struggling with my gender identity.”

I thanked her for her apology. When she asked if she was forgiven, and I tried to avoid answering. I am still not over what she did to me. What Z did to me impacted me greatly, as I was a impressionable young girl. I struggled with self esteem for years afterwards.

Z started getting defensive. She told me that I was being petty and that I should forgive her. I told her, “Why? You will always be the boy that bullied me. An apology won’t change that.”

She got really offended when I said the word boy, and said that I was misgendering her. She called me a petty, transphobic, vindictive, and ignorant, then stormed out.

AITA?”

Here’s what Reddit users had to say about this situation.

This person said that it’s the memories that count, not what gender the individual is now.

Photo Credit: Reddit

And here’s a one-liner that people should keep in mind.

Take a look.

Photo Credit: Reddit

Another person made a good point. You don’t have to forgive people if you don’t want to. That’s completely up to each person.

Photo Credit: Reddit

A reader made a great point and argued that the bully is STILL bullying the writer now through these actions.

Take a look at what they had to say.

Photo Credit: Reddit

And another Reddit user had a very similar story to tell.

And they also chimed in about how the writer of this article has done nothing wrong.

Photo Credit: Reddit

And here’s a hot take.

This person said that “being transgender is seen as an excuse for anything and everything…”

Check out the rest of their thoughts below.

Photo Credit: Reddit

What are your thoughts about this situation?

Was this person in the wrong? Or were they totally justified in their actions?

Talk to us in the comments and let us know what you think. Thanks in advance!

The post “Was I Wrong to Tell My Childhood Bully (Who Is Transgender) That She Will Always Be the Boy Who Bullied Me?” appeared first on UberFacts.

Man Asks if He Was Wrong for Yelling at his Wife and In-Laws After They Told Him to Stop Cuddling His Daughter

I’ve heard so many awful in-law stories lately that I think I’m still gonna hold off on getting married for a little while…

I think some of my married friends out there might know what I’m talking about, right?

Because things can get complicated and much worse when in-laws try to butt in and tell the people who are married to their children how to do things…and here’s a perfect example of that.

The man took to the Reddit “Am I the *sshole” forum to tell his story and ask for feedback. Let’s take a look.

AITA for telling my wife and in-laws to f*ck off after they told me to stop cuddling my daughter?

“I have 3 kids, 15F, 12F and 7M.

My oldest has always been a cuddler, and that suits me fine because I am too. Recently my in laws were over, and we were all watching a movie together. It was a kids movie, and so my 15yo was bored out of her mind and tired, so she started to snuggle up to me and go to sleep.

After the movie was over, we sent all the kids to bed/their rooms and got chatting for a bit longer. There was a fair bit of wine involved (I was sober though), and eventually after a short silence my FIL let it drop that he thought it was inappropriate I still cuddled with my 15 yo.

I don’t really know why he brought it up suddenly, but I was prepared to laugh it off and just assumed it was the alcohol. To my surprise, my wife and MIL both agreed with him.

I have a lot of respect for my in-laws, I get along with them great and I consider them closer than my own parents. Obviously I’m quite fond of my wife as well, but I outright told them to “f*ck off and go f*ck themselves” and then left them and went to bed.

I’ve never spoken to any of them like that before, but it felt like the right thing to say in the moment. They all want me to apologize for being so rude to them. AITA?

Edit due to info request: We were not spooning, she was sitting next to me laying on my chest.”

Oh, boy…let’s see what people on Reddit had to say about this.

This person made it abundantly clear that the man was not wrong in any way for his actions.

Photo Credit: Reddit

And another reader responded with an interesting take on the whole situation.

Could it be that they were trying to link this dad’s behavior to toxic masculinity?

Photo Credit: Reddit

Another parent weighed in and said there is nothing wrong with the dad’s actions and that they still cuddle with their older kids, as well.

Photo Credit: Reddit

This Reddit user said that we as human beings need contact and it’s a basic need.

So, in other words, there’s nothing wrong with it.

Photo Credit: Reddit

A 19-year-old individual talked about how they still cuddle with their mom.

Photo Credit: Reddit

Finally, a person made a very good point about not letting the daughter even know about this situation, because it could lead to hurt feelings.

Photo Credit: Reddit

So what do you think about this?

Was this guy wrong for lashing out at his family like this?

Talk to us in the comments and let us know what you think! Thanks!

The post Man Asks if He Was Wrong for Yelling at his Wife and In-Laws After They Told Him to Stop Cuddling His Daughter appeared first on UberFacts.