15+ Memes for the Junk Food Lover

Man, do I love me some fast food and junk food every now and then.

Here are 20 memes for all my fellow junk food lovers out there.

1. Losers…

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2. Yep

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3. Same page, cat buddy

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4. Cause it’s awesome?

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5. That’s the luckiest dog I’ve ever seen

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6. I jogged a lot today…

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7. Eh, just do it.

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8. Separate dessert stomach

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9. Really, pizza is just a tomato salad with croutons beneath and cheese on top

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10. Square pizza ≠ good

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11. At least I have fries

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12. Sneaky clever

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13. We’ve all been here

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14. A solid attitude towards life

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15. Pure bliss

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16. They’re amazed, you’re amazing

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17. Smell that salty air

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18. In costume, too

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19. Miracle of miracles!

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20. We all need dat

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I think a trip to the local White Castle is now in order.

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15 People Share the Riskiest Moment of Their Life

I’ve done some pretty stupid stuff in my life and luckily I still have all my limbs and nothing too bad ever happened.

It’s nice to know I’m not alone in making some dumb decisions in my past. AskReddit users open up and share the biggest risks they’ve ever taken.

1. Quicksand

“As a kid me and some friends built a ‘bridge’ out of hay and wood across a dried out bog. I tested it and fell through somewhere in the middle. Thankfully I’d read in a book that if you’re being sucked down by quicksand or something, the best thing to do is relax and spread your weight out evenly. That kept my head and arms above the muck until one of my friends could find a tree branch to haul me out.

Every time someone posts one of those ‘quicksand wasn’t as big an issue as I thought it would be’ memes I’m like… hm.”

2. Probably won’t do that again

“I was ten riding the DC Metro for the first time by myself when I dropped my keys on the track. Two minutes till the next train vs 5 seconds to get my keys from the track so I jumped down.

It’s harder than you think to get back on those platforms.”

3. Never a good idea

“Farting silently during a job interview.”

4. Hero

“I am a rugby player and was a bank teller in 2009. I’ll never forget the date: 09/10/2009.

A group of 5-6 burglars stole $47K from an ATM I was doing some maintenance. When they ran out of the branch, everyone of them but one went to the right; the dipshit who went left was carrying the money bag, and my rugby instincts instinctly kicked in: I ran after him for half a block and tackled him from behind.

The look of despair in his eyes when he saw a crazy teller it’s one of the memories I’ll never forget. We tried to punch each other, with no success. When he realized I wasn’t letting him go away with the cash, he threw the bag in the middle of the avenue and ran away.

The whole action lasted about 60 seconds, I believe. Afterwards, I couldn’t stop thinking “what if?”: what if he had a gun? What if he had someone waiting him in the direction he went?

My mother wanted to kill me, but I got promoted. Good times.”

5. Dead tired

“Near the end of a 68 hour week, I was dead tired and just wanted to go home. I had three tons suspended in the air by a shop crane and I left the remote on the other side of the load. Instead of walking around it, I walked right under it and grabbed the remote. I froze for a moment and contemplated what I just did. Put the load down, clocked off and went to sleep thinking about how much of an idiot I am.”

6. Just like a horror movie

“I hitchhiked across a province, and at nightfall after getting soaked during a downfall (people tend not to pick you up during the rain), I was exhausted and so defeated, and so I accepted a complete stranger’s offer to go to his cabin in the woods for the night.”

7. Stranger danger

“Stayed with a stranger whom I just met after a concert when I had nowhere to stay that night. Wasn’t sexual, he didn’t try anything or insinuate that I owed him anything – just a nice bloke offering the spare bed in his hotel room.”

8. Plastered in the ‘hood

“Went with some friends to a party. We drove there, and unfortunately everyone (including myself) got plastered. The party was in a bad neighborhood in the Bronx and I insisted that we chip in for a cab because driving drunk would be stupid.

I was called a pussy, and idiot, moron, then told if I don’t like it I can walk home. F*ck that I know my life is worth it so I just headed off towards the Grand Concourse (this was back in the 80’s, bad times then).

Walked about 15 blocks avoiding groups of people (especially the ones shouting at me), got tailed for a bit by a group of older guys and made a mad dash for the subway. It was 1 am, the station was empty and it took me 2 hours to get home.

Next day I get a call from one of my friend’s parents, they were upset with me for letting them drive home (they got into a fender bender with a cop car (yea karma)).

I laughed when she told me what happened, then explained that I was the one that was put down and told to walk home if I didn’t like it, they wouldn’t take a cab. She apologized and I made sure that every one of those asshats weren’t part of my life anymore.”

9. Don’t do it

“I drove home with a drunk friend who was taking shots before we left the bar. I was 21 and stupid. On the way home instead of taking the turn we went into a ditch and stopped 2 feet short of a telephone pole. We were fine but it definitely was a wake up call.”

10. Random pills

“Picked up a cap of what I presumed was molly at a party off the floor and popped it.

Good party. Decent high. Can’t believe how stupid I was.”

11. Car surfing

“When I was in high school some guys were “car surfing” in the parking lot and one almost died. The two cars collided, which sent him flying off the roof. His top half went through the windshield while his bottom half was nearly smashed between the cars.

Needless to say, they both got in enormous amounts of trouble.”

12. Still pretty lucky

“Flew off, head first into the curb. Induced coma for about two weeks. When I woke up, I was insane. They hand cuffed me to the bed because I kept trying to run away. Seeing as I was completely paralyzed on one side, that wasn’t safe. Month in the rehab hospital once I was medically out of the woods. Learning to walk, talk again. How to use my fingers.

This was at age 15.

Vision problems for a few months after that. Nothing had the “outline” around it, if that makes any sense. Things just kind of bled into each other.

Couldn’t remember words. Developed a weird tick where I would tap my fingers together when talking, as if trying to grab the word. Still happens sometimes.

Persistent bouts of “cloudy head.” I can’t describe them. They’re just “bad head days.” Still struggle with impulse control and temper.

The seizures started four years later. Lots of different meds and a couple wrecked cars later, we found something that worked. The wrecks weren’t seizure related, but the lack of sleep probably was.

The migraines just started this February, at age 37. Debilitating dizziness and sound sensitivity. Can’t think. Can’t sleep. Neurologist thought they were seizures but later decided on migraines. New meds and a chiropractor are helping, but some days are still hella rough.

But all the docs thought I wouldn’t live and if I did I would be requiring 24/7 care, so I still got pretty lucky.”

13. Shortcut

“Driving through a military base closed to the public in hopes of arriving at my destination faster.”

14. A bad idea

“Mixing heroin and Xanax, don’t do that kids, that’s how you die.”

15. That was nice?

“Sitting on the trunk of a car. “Just drive slow and I’ll hop off at my house.”

They did not drive slowly. I got to be in a coma though, so that was nice.”

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12 Ridiculous Kitchen Fails

Ever heard of the saying “baking is a science and cooking is an art?” Both of these are definitely skills, and for most people, they improve with practice. Let’s hope the people responsible for the photos below have improved.

These 12 people went way beyond a screw up and into a massive fail worthy of internet shame. Just take a look!

 

#12. I guess not everyone knows that microwave safe and stovetop safe are not the same thing.

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(Hand covering face emoji)

#11. I honestly didn’t think it was possible to make pizza unappetizing.

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I’m sorry, no.

#10. When you just scrape it together and tell yourself it’s fine while you cry and watch Netflix.

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Eh, still looks pretty good to me.

#9. Sometimes creativity can turn out a bit scarier than you intended.

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I mean, they still sort of look like chicks? Sort of?

#8. Chicken nuggets with a side of melted pan.

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Really would’ve loved to have understood the plan here.

#7. Wasting nachos is an unpardonable offense.

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I can’t even begin to figure out what happened here.

#6. I’m more intrigued than I probably should be.

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…What eggs did those come from?

#5. How even…?

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This person’s got a lot of ‘splainin’ to do.

#4. A lesson in how cute can turn sad so quickly.

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At least they were together when they perished.

#3. Not so fast, sir.

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Well, you got the cheese part right…

#2. I bet this person is ordering out from now on.

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Why is everyone so afraid of cookie sheets?!

#1. There goes the assumption that “anyone” can make a grilled cheese.

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Maybe they were going for a Trump impression?

 

May your smoke detectors all be in working order!

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20 Times Kids Got an ‘A’ For Effort Getting an ‘F’

Some kids, even though they failed miserably in school, get an A+ in my book. If you’re gonna do really bad on a test or an assignment, you might as well excel at it, right?

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I think they all deserve an “A” for effort.

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20 Times Kids Got an ‘A’ For Effort Getting an ‘F’

Some kids, even though they failed miserably in school, get an A+ in my book. If you’re gonna do really bad on a test or an assignment, you might as well excel at it, right?

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I think they all deserve an “A” for effort.

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12+ People Share Their Petty Relationship Deal Breakers

Whether you want to admit it or not, we all have a line we draw in the sand when it comes to relationships. Sometimes we can even be petty. It might be the way they eat their peas, maybe their nose is a little crooked, etc.

These AskReddit users shared their petty, and funny, relationship deal breakers. Take note….it can be rough out there.

1. Not gonna work

“He was allergic to hummus and I f*cking love hummus.”

2. No smoking

“Sorry, but can’t stand smokers.”

3. Don’t believe in it

“I can’t date people who believe in Soulmates™ or the “One”.

I can’t shake the feeling they’re using you as a placeholder until they find their mythical 100% match. Or that they believe relationships with their ‘soulmate’ wouldn’t need actual work or active effort.”

4. Be an adult

“I just went out with a guy last week and asked him what he was for Halloween last year and he said “an adult”. Dealbreaker. I’m an adult everyday, including Halloween.”

5. Don’t interfere with dirty talk

“Goofy accent. Sorry. I like dirty talk and it doesn’t work if I want to burst out laughing.”

6. Yikes

“Loud breathing. Can’t do it. I want to tear your airways out and feed them to you if I can hear you breathe.”

7. That is not pleasant

“Either chew with their mouth open or make a lot of noise while eating.”

8. Uh uh

“Nose hair. How do you not notice you have long pieces of hair sticking out of your nose? Tweezers can fix that sh*t in two seconds.”

9. Hurry up!

“I once broke up with someone because he tied his shoes too slowly. Like he just…took forever to make the bow? He was bent over for almost a full minute every time. Inexplicable.”

10. Okay, that’s petty

“Fingernails. I don’t know how to properly explain this, but there are two types of nails: some people’s fingernails don’t press into the finger on the sides, and aren’t as curved, giving a wider, flatter nail than others. These people’s hands creep me the f— out and I can’t stand being touched by people with this type of fingernail. It’s ridiculous, and I know it’s stupid, but it makes me so irrationally uncomfortable.”

11. Intriguing

“If they have a go-to word that they use all the time. Most recently, I was seeing a girl who said, “That’s intriguing,” when responding to anything I said that was mildly interesting.”

12. Back off

“Too clingy too soon. We do NOT have to text all day or talk every day.”

13. Can’t look away

“I once broke up with someone because he didn’t clean his ears (it was actually so gross.) Not in his ears, but like the fold behind his ears. I just kept staring and thinking about it…”

14. Not a good look

“You can’t wear/like those flat brim baseball hats. I’m 99% positive you’re a self absorbed douche if you do.”

15. Ewwwww!

“She ate mayonnaise out of the jar with a spoon.”

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12+ People Share Their Petty Relationship Deal Breakers

Whether you want to admit it or not, we all have a line we draw in the sand when it comes to relationships. Sometimes we can even be petty. It might be the way they eat their peas, maybe their nose is a little crooked, etc.

These AskReddit users shared their petty, and funny, relationship deal breakers. Take note….it can be rough out there.

1. Not gonna work

“He was allergic to hummus and I f*cking love hummus.”

2. No smoking

“Sorry, but can’t stand smokers.”

3. Don’t believe in it

“I can’t date people who believe in Soulmates™ or the “One”.

I can’t shake the feeling they’re using you as a placeholder until they find their mythical 100% match. Or that they believe relationships with their ‘soulmate’ wouldn’t need actual work or active effort.”

4. Be an adult

“I just went out with a guy last week and asked him what he was for Halloween last year and he said “an adult”. Dealbreaker. I’m an adult everyday, including Halloween.”

5. Don’t interfere with dirty talk

“Goofy accent. Sorry. I like dirty talk and it doesn’t work if I want to burst out laughing.”

6. Yikes

“Loud breathing. Can’t do it. I want to tear your airways out and feed them to you if I can hear you breathe.”

7. That is not pleasant

“Either chew with their mouth open or make a lot of noise while eating.”

8. Uh uh

“Nose hair. How do you not notice you have long pieces of hair sticking out of your nose? Tweezers can fix that sh*t in two seconds.”

9. Hurry up!

“I once broke up with someone because he tied his shoes too slowly. Like he just…took forever to make the bow? He was bent over for almost a full minute every time. Inexplicable.”

10. Okay, that’s petty

“Fingernails. I don’t know how to properly explain this, but there are two types of nails: some people’s fingernails don’t press into the finger on the sides, and aren’t as curved, giving a wider, flatter nail than others. These people’s hands creep me the f— out and I can’t stand being touched by people with this type of fingernail. It’s ridiculous, and I know it’s stupid, but it makes me so irrationally uncomfortable.”

11. Intriguing

“If they have a go-to word that they use all the time. Most recently, I was seeing a girl who said, “That’s intriguing,” when responding to anything I said that was mildly interesting.”

12. Back off

“Too clingy too soon. We do NOT have to text all day or talk every day.”

13. Can’t look away

“I once broke up with someone because he didn’t clean his ears (it was actually so gross.) Not in his ears, but like the fold behind his ears. I just kept staring and thinking about it…”

14. Not a good look

“You can’t wear/like those flat brim baseball hats. I’m 99% positive you’re a self absorbed douche if you do.”

15. Ewwwww!

“She ate mayonnaise out of the jar with a spoon.”

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8+ Misconceptions About Beer

There seem to be breweries popping up on almost every street corner these days, and for good reason. People love the suds!

Who doesn’t love a cold beer at the end of a hard day (or a particularly stressful week)? Basically all of us do – beer culture is immensely popular in the U.S. and around the world right now.

But there’s probably still a lot you don’t know about beer, so pay attention to these 10 common misconceptions about brewskis.

1. Beer bottles are all the same

Photo Credit: Unsplash,Rhett Wesley

Bottom line: the darker, the better. Clear and green bottles are the most susceptible to light, so they have the most problems. So, to be on the safe side, go with anything in a dark bottle.

Sorry, Rolling Rock drinkers…

2. You’ll get a gut from beer, but not from cocktails

A popular refrain of young men and women across the land…but not exactly true. Of course, beer is packed with calories, but Beaune says of this phenomenon: “Most glasses of wine are pretty high in alcohol and a lot of cocktails are way higher in calories. If you drink a margarita that’s one of the highest calorie things you can drink.”

I think she just shattered the dreams of gin and tonic drinkers everywhere.

3. Dark beers are always heavy

Photo Credit: Pixabay

Looking for a lighter beer, drink something that looks light. Looking for something heavier, drink a dark beer, right? Wrong. Hallie Beaune, the author of The Naked Pint: An Unadulterated Guide to Craft Beer, says,

“People naturally assume they are heavier. I think it’s that connection to Guinness, which promotes itself as creamy and almost like a meal, that’s the feeling they give in their commercials. For a lot of people that’s the first dark beer they’ve had so they assume they’re all similar when, really, dark beers are just dark because of the roast level of the malt that’s used in the beer.”

Bet you weren’t aware of that.

4. Drinking from the bottle is the best way to enjoy beer

Hallie Beaune says on this subject,

“Drinking beer from the bottle is another no-no, mostly because what you taste comes from your olfactory senses from your nose, so if you take a sip of something from that kind of bottle your nose isn’t participating at all. It’s too small for you to get a whiff of the beer. Just like if you were drinking red wine out of a wine bottle, you wouldn’t really be able to evaluate that wine.”

5. Beer can be stored anywhere

Photo Credit: Flickr,Ewan Munro

Wrong again. I’ve learned this lesson the hard way over and over again. The best option is to store beer in the refrigerator. The keys to success: dark and cold.

6. “Skunky” = No big deal

Skunky is not just a cute little term for beer that tastes a little bit off. Hallie Beaune says,

“Light can hurt beer—they call it lightstruck. The light interacts with the hops in beer (the four ingredients in beer are malt, water, hops and yeast), and it can actually have this chemical reaction that creates a smell that’s the same as a skunk gives off, which is why you hear about skunky beer.”

You know you’ve had this experience with a Heineken, am I right?

7. Beer needs to be served cold

Photo Credit: Unsplash,rawpixel

Many of us love our beer to be near freezing, straight out of the cooler, and sometimes even served in a frosted mug. Hey, I even enjoy mine with some ice floating in it. But we’ve been doing it all wrong for years! Beer is actually best served at 44 degrees Fahrenheit (except for a few brews that should be served only slightly chilled, like barrel-aged Stout).

The reason for the 44 degrees is because taste buds become dead when anything is served colder than that specific temperature, so it kind of defeats the purpose. So try to keep that Budweiser at 44 degrees for maximum enjoyment!

8. Canned beer means lesser quality

I don’t know about you, but I’ve seen quite a few really good beers in cans lately. The reason is that cans are a great way to protect the product. Canned beers used to have an aluminum taste, but Hallie Beaune says that most of today’s craft breweries use a water-based liner so the beer doesn’t actually touch the aluminum. But keep those cans nice and cold, because they heat up and cool down pretty fast.

9. The frosted mug myth

This ties in with the first item on this list. As I mentioned earlier, a lot of people love their beer served in a mug straight out of the freezer. But this will end up lessening the flavor of your beer. So just say no!

10. Guinness is always frothy

Photo Credit: Pixabay

Ahhhh, beautiful Guinness. The nectar of the Gods. Every pint looks like it is delivered straight from Heaven and set in front of you on the bar. But the creamy beer is served that way mostly because of the long, narrow taps that are used for stouts, which have more nitrogen than standard taps.

Bottoms up!

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6 Compelling Fan Theories About ‘Friends’

Plenty of people have spent their spare time thinking a little too hard about everyone’s favorite New Yorkers, and have come up with these 6 theories that just might change the way you think about everything.

#6. It was one long commercial for Starbucks.

Photo Credit: NBC

One Facebook user went on a rant claiming that the show was a 10-year marketing plot designed by Starbucks to convince young people that hanging out in coffee shops was the place to be. He even went so far as to suggest that Rachel’s last name (Green, like the Starbucks logo) and hair (styled like the Starbucks’ mermaid) were meant to be subliminal messages.

Yeah. I’m not really buying it, either.

#5. Rachel dreamed the whole thing.

Photo Credit: NBC

There’s a photo on the front of the Season 4 DVD box where the entire cast is asleep  – except for Rachel who is wide awake right in the middle. It ignited discussion, much of which centered on the idea that Rachel must have dreamed the entire show.

#4. There’s a Parks and Recreation crossover.

Photo Credit: NBC

In “The One With All the Candy,” Rachel claims she doesn’t sleep with guys on the first date, only to have Monica call her out with specific names – one of whom is Ben Wyatt. According to Reddit, Rachel and Ben would have been around the same age (in their mid-twenties) at the time, so it could be Leslie Knope’s Ben Wyatt.

That’s one fight I’d plunk down money to see. #TeamKnope

But seriously, in all likelihood, I’d call that a nod to Friends and not a crossover. Semantics, maybe.

#3. Mr. Heckles was murdered.

Photo Credit: NBC

Remember Rachel and Monica’s mean old neighbor who supposedly died of natural causes back in Season 2? Well, according to one Redditor, Mr. Heckles was killed by his “dinner party” guest and his mysterious claim about his birds being disturbed by their noise was a last-second plea for help.

#2. Here’s the reason they always got “their” table at Central Perk.

Photo Credit: NBC

Gunther, of course. There’s nothing he wouldn’t do to win Rachel’s affections, so he kept the best table in the place ready and waiting for her and her friends.

Honestly, she would have been better off with him than Ross.

#1. Ross lost custody of Ben because he’s a terrible person.

Photo Credit: NBC

The more episodes of Friends I rewatch, the more Ross’ behavior makes me cringe, along with raising several red flags as far as possessive, jealous behavior in relationships. Add that to the fact that he slept with his students, tried to hook up with his cousin, and asked a self-defense instructor to help him frighten his female friends, and well…this theory has some credence.

Adding to that is the fact that Ben is never seen visiting his dad after the 8th season, and never even meets his half-sister when she’s born.

Seriously, if I were Carol, I would keep my son as far away from that horrid example of manhood as possible.

Any new theories come to mind for you after reading through these? I’m all ears!

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15 People Share Their ‘I Survived’ Moments

Lucky for these AskReddit users, they lived to tell their stories. All survived extremely harrowing situations and had close calls with death.

1. Almost drowned

“I got “sucked under” or whatever in the little Tennessee river at a common swimming spot, and couldn’t find my way up and kept rolling. I eventually went limp and popped up a little ways down the river and got to the bank and walked back and no one was the wiser.”

2. Don’t eat that

“When I was 5, we moved into a house where a massive oleander bush was growing over the fence. Oleander flowers littered the lawn. I played with them and then went inside, had something to eat, and played with my sisters for a bit.

Next thing I remember, I’m in a doctor’s office. I’m shivering and I ask for a blanket. The doctor puts a sheet of the paper that they use to cover the bed over me. They explain to my parents that I’m going to be fine and I can be taken home.

When I was a bit older (10 yrs), my mother told me that I had been telling her that my chest hurt and I couldn’t breathe, and she grew concerned enough to take me to the ER. I had fallen asleep in the car and stayed asleep until waking up in the doc’s office.

I googled it and read that Oleander is incredibly poisonous and works by paralyzing the respiratory system. Just one oleander flower can kill a horse. People have died from using oleander branches to roast food when camping. I had gotten pretty severally poisoned just by eating food with oleander residue on my hands. If I had bitten or eaten just a bit of the flower (which I very easily could have done since I was a dumba** that often ate random things), I would have died pretty quickly.”

3. Choking hazard

“I got to work before anyone else was there. I started eating a corn muffin and a huge chunk got caught in my throat. I couldn’t breathe and was choking to death. I finally dislodged it by ramming my body against a chest height counter over and over again until it popped out.”

4. Close call

“Had a car crash at 120mph and walked away with a fractured collar bone, pretty lucky I’d say. When the police came and spoke to me they said they saw the car and were expecting to be cutting bodies out of the car. I was a passenger and the driver had a few bruises but that was it.

They also calculated that my friend was less than an inch from caving his head in on a pole sticking out of the back of the lorry we hit.”

5. Don’t drink and sleep on your back

“Not glamorous or heroic at all, but I got completely trashed on wine one night and woke up lying on my back covered in vomit. It terrifies me to think I could have asphyxiated in my sleep.”

6. I’m not Mick

“Had a knife pulled out on me by a group of 4/5 guys while walking to a friend’s place after being out the night before, I didn’t realize I could run so fast let alone with a terrible hangover!

I’m not sure if they genuinely thought I was someone else that they had a grudge against but they where calling me Mick and apparently they thought I was him, they really did seem like they wanted to do some damage as well, sometimes I think about if Mick is a real person and if these guys actually did ever get around to stabbing him.”

7. Loco

“During our divorce, my ex-wife cut the brake cables on my bicycle. I figured it out before I went out into traffic. Didn’t die.”

8. Cold water

“I fell into a very, very cold creek when I was 12, wearing a winter coat and insulated boots (which get really heavy when wet, it turns out). The water was up to my neck before I started treading water. It took me 3 tries to find a branch that wasn’t rotted so I could pull myself out.

I very easily could have drowned or succumbed to hypothermia. And the only thing I could think was: my mom is going to be so pissed.

I climbed up the bank, facing my aunt’s house but on the wrong side of the creek, and clumsily went into the building behind me. I thought it was a rec center, but it turned out to be a fire station. They got me some dry sweats and called my mom’s cell (which my aunt happened to have). She called my uncle, who is a drama king and freaked out, screaming for my mother at the top of his lungs (which got her freaked out). Then they drove out of the subdivision to pick me up.

When they arrived, they informed me that the fireman told my aunt they had rescued me from the creek. I was pissed. My 12YO butt had pulled MYSELF out of the creek. Bastards, trying to steal my thunder.

I still get made fun of for falling in.”

9. Twister

“I was 7 when my mother attempted to race a tornado because she didn’t want to turn around and go back to her friend’s house to seek shelter in the basement. We were literally like a block or two away from their house and had just said goodbye as the tornado warning for the county we had to drive into (and our current county) was issued (about a 10-15 minute drive.) The weatherman on the radio was frantic saying typical stuff like it’s a very dangerous storm, get out of the car, do not try to outrun a tornado, get out of mobile homes and seek shelter in ditches, etc.

My family is full of idiots. She called me names when I started crying because I was scared and had me lean out the window to look for the funnel, and, because I was out of other options, I did. The sky went green, we were the only car on the road. It started raining hard and I couldn’t see shit. I thought about jumping out of the car and running back into the house or into a ditch but she was driving too fast on the highway and wouldn’t slow down.

About 10-15 minutes later we did drive through where the tornado had touched down, trees and powerlines were down, there was storm damage and hail/fog still on the road. We had narrowly missed it when it touched down and went back up minutes before we moved into the area.

I pissed myself in terror that day but I survived.”

10. Terrifying

“I was pregnant and in my last trimester. Having some strange symptoms, but I had just seen my doctor 3 days before and he said all was good, so brushed them off. Then that night had a terrific blinding headache, started seeing colored lights all around so I grabbed my phone to call 911. Before I could dial the numbers everything started getting blurry and then black.

I woke up 3 days later in an ICU, no longer pregnant and with a trach tube. Turns out my doctor didn’t diagnose my pre-eclampsia and it turned into eclampsia which caused me to have grand mal seizures for 11 hours, alone, until my roommate came home to find me.

She told me later that she thought someone had murdered me. There was blood everywhere, and all over me, since I almost severed parts of my tongue while seizing. There were also bloody handprints in the hall and kitchen since apparently between episodes of seizing I would walk around and try to do things. I have no memory of that.

Anyway after a 3 day coma, emergency c-section, emergency trach cut into my windpipe to establish air, lot’s of drugs to reduce my insane high blood pressure, tongue surgery to piece the sucker back together, then month long hospital stay to recover, and 2 month hospital stay for my son and both my son and I survived!

He was only 1lb and the size of a barbie doll, now almost 7 and doing great. And the doctors said they don’t know how I survived, but I know I am super stubborn and wasn’t ready to go.”

11. Country roads

“When I was 17 my mother was driving us to a nearby town for a lunch. On the back country road we hit an oil patch or something that made the road slippy. The car swung like a horizontal pendulum (lucky there was nothing else coming) for a stretch, we hit the side of the road and the back end of the car rose up and over. I remember when the windscreen cracked because it cracked in slow motion. I instinctively pressed my hands against the roof.

The car landed, the roof crumpled in quite a bit, the engine cut off – Katy Perry singing through the radio did not. Myself and my mum were ‘trapped’ because the doors were below the bank by the road and we couldn’t open them. Eventually a car stopped (after we counted about 10 cars driving past) and the occupants prised the door open. Getting out, standing up and brushing myself down, I looked at where the car had landed. One cars length forward, we would have sunk into the bog. Any further left or right, we would have landed on the boulders. The car had flipped into the perfect spot. Crazy moment.

Anyway, we eventually got home then ate locally for lunch. Fish and chips.”

12. Drunk driver

“I was almost killed by a drunk driver when I was in middle school. I was spending the night at my friends house with my younger brother when sometime around midnight we heard some people fighting down the street. Being dumb teenagers, we went to investigate just as one of the drunken guys that was fighting peeled off in his car towards us.

My friend and brother jumped into some bushes as I ran towards someone’s front lawn. Just as I turned around, I saw the car less than 10 feet way coming straight at me. I just froze. The car slammed hard into a tree that just happened to be slightly in front of me, saving my life. I was only hit with some debris and walked away… shaking but alive.”

13. Wife material

“The girl I was dating tried throwing me off a balcony and I was clinging onto the railing. Her dad had to stop her and pull me up.”

14. Beatdown

“I survived having 5 guys beating me half to death. All hits were on my head/face none on my body. Injuries so severe cops ruled it as an attempt of murder. Broke everything from the nose down. Cant say I survived the PTSD though. I still tense up when surrounded by people and prepare for a surprise fight.

Another Story: a drunk bus driver rear ended me while i was on a motorcycle. The injuries werent that bad but he could have easily run me over when i was sliding across the asphalt on my back.”

15. Rear ended

“1996. Had just come out of a tunnel midnight Saturday night/ Easter Sunday. Four of us in a 1988ish Honda Accord, I was riding shotgun and the girls in back were asleep. The driver did not know if she should take an off ramp so pulled off and put the car in Park to check the map. Yes, hindsight not smart but the roads were dead, it was so weird for NYC.

A drunk driver rear ended us going at what the cops estimated was 70 mph and hit us repeatedly, bouncing us 100 yards down the road. There were no skid marks from him trying to brake. The car must have bunny hopped 3 or 4 times before it stopped. All the doors were jammed and only 1 window would roll down, so that’s how we got out. It was totaled. The frame was twisted and trunk was literally compressed flush up to the rear window, but no broken windows.

The police were surprised no one was seriously injured, because no one was hurt. I had a very mild backstrain from twisting during the crash to look at the girls in back that woke up screaming.. it cleared right up after a hot shower.

I’ll always be so very grateful to the nice Jewish couple that stopped and let us pile in their car to keep warm until the police came. They were so sweet, offering us water and matzo bread to help as the adrenaline wore off.

We were so lucky. 1980s Honda Accords were tanks.”

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