Month: July 2021

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Funny Tweets to Make Your Day a Little More Pleasant

I need a bit of pleasantness in my life.

Things have been quite ugly in the world for a while but we’re gonna change that immediately!

We have some tweets for you to look at today that we think are really gonna set your pants on fire with their hilarity.

Do you think you can handle the heat?

We sure hope so! Because we have a feeling you’re gonna start scrolling if you’ve made it this far.

Enjoy!

1. That would not be a fun job.

Darn it, I have to start over…

2. Uh oh…what happened here?

A major break up, that’s what!

3. I never thought about it this way…

This should be a movie.

4. This is very inappropriate!

But…I still laughed.

5. I can see why this couple needs to get divorced.

This would probably get old.

6. Well, that’s a nice way to approach it.

She’s not taking sides.

7. This is amazing.

Teach him some more slang for our sake!

8. I’ve often wondered this…

I’d like to get to the bottom of it.

9. That’s when you know you’re really depressed.

Do you ever do this?

10. A life tip we can all use!

I’m gonna try it soon!

11. You know you had one.

But the question is, do you still have it?

12. Time to come clean.

What really happened out there…?

Now we want to hear from you.

In the comments, please share some funny memes, tweets, photos, or jokes that you’ve seen lately.

We look forward to it!

The post Funny Tweets to Make Your Day a Little More Pleasant appeared first on UberFacts.

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Enjoy These Tweets About Being in Your 30s, You Old Geezer

I’m now in my early 40s, so let me spit a little bit of truth about what your 30s are going to be like.

You’ll grow in many ways and you’ll start to find out what’s really important to you.

Things you did in your 20s will seem crazy: staying out all night, going to work on three hours of sleep, eating pizza five nights a week, it all starts to catch up to you!

And then one day you’ll realize that a perfect Friday night now means staying in, having an early dinner, watching a movie, and going to bed by 10…pm.

It’s sad, but true…check out these tweets about that magical decade.

1. This is a must.

There’s no way around it. You have to do it.

2. You can even do it by flipping someone off.

It’s sad, but true.

3. I’m not ready for this!

Why are you so upset?

4. Please don’t do that again.

I’m in my thirties, remember?

5. Both of these are true.

And don’t you try to deny it!

6. Oh…that’s not makeup.

Now I’m depressed.

7. You can do anything you want!

With laundry, that is…

8. All downhill from here.

That soup does kind of sound exciting, though…

9. Eat as many as you want!

You’ll thank me later.

10. That sounds tiring.

You didn’t see this coming, did you?

11. You’re officially old.

It is what it is…

12. Times sure have changed…

Just remember to not let them forget about all those old mistakes.

If you’re in your 30s (or beyond), tell us how that glorious decade is treating you.

Talk to us in the comments!

Thanks in advance!

The post Enjoy These Tweets About Being in Your 30s, You Old Geezer appeared first on UberFacts.

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Scientists Are Planning on Building Noah’s Ark…On the Moon

There are plenty of headlines I never expected to write since I started writing articles for you lovely people, and this is definitely one of them. I mean…Noah’s Ark? On the moon?

Let’s dig in here and get started on answering the many, many questions that you’ve probably already got brewing, eh?

Shall we start with why?

The answer to this is actually quite simple – you’ve seen movies like Armageddon and Deep Impact et al, right? The idea that an asteroid could suddenly slam into earth and take out all of humanity? Like, nothing left?

Scientists actually believe that, in the year 2068, something like that could be coming for us in reality.

The answer could be a 21st-century version of Noah’s Ark that, instead of containing two of every animal, would contain a repository of cryogenically frozen reproductive cells from 6.7 million species on Earth.

Dr. Jekam Thanga is the mastermind behind the project, and sees the whole thing as a global insurance policy.

“As a human civilization, we’re in a fragile state. We’re not really that rigid or able to face all kinds of adversities. And Earth’s ecosystem is also very fragile.”

They plan to utilize the lava tubes just below the moon’s surface to build the compound and a lunar solar farm to generate their electricity, and to use robots to man the laboratory, and no, we’re not living in a science fiction novel currently.

But we might be soon.

The lava tubes were formed billions of years ago by streams of lava that melted through the soft rock underground. They’re about 328 feet in diameter and could protect the facility from solar radiation, micrometeorites, and the extreme surface temperatures – not an ideal spot for humans.

At least not yet, says Thanga.

“Setting up a base inside a lava tube seems like a plausible way to go if we wanted to set up a permanent settlement on the moon. But we as humans are not mole rates. We’re going to feel pretty stuffy being underground without being able to see outside.”

Thanga says we could use existing technology and materials to build the actual structure on the moon, but the miniature robots being proposed would take a bit more finagling.

“What we envision is taking one of the existing pits – just the opening into the lava tube – and installing an elevator shaft there.”

He envisions elevator shafts and cryo preservation that shelves petri dishes much like books in a library.

There would also be a system for communicating back and forth with earth, and solar panels would be installed to turn sunlight into electricity. Modular batteries will attach to the cryo preservation modules and keep the lights on and maintain temperatures that are optimal for the samples.

If you think this all sounds a bit futuristic, think again – Thanga says this could be a possibility within the next three decades. He estimates it would take around 250 rocket launches to ferry 50 specimens each of the 6.7 million species to the ark, a goal that would be substantially helped by the private companies like SpaceX and Blue Origin who are launching their own rockets into orbit.

If an asteroid does slam into Earth, let’s hope someone is still around to launch a rocket to the moon.

Someone who also knows how to use the petri dishes of cells to bring some more humans to life.

So, maybe they do have a few kinks still to work out, eh?

The post Scientists Are Planning on Building Noah’s Ark…On the Moon appeared first on UberFacts.

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Check Out the Viral “Popcorn Salad” Recipe That Has People Horrified

You’ve most likely heard the saying that there’s “no accounting for taste,” which basically means when it comes to things like food and fashion, people like what they like and there’s really no point in trying to change it.

That said, when someone claims to be a professional chef, though, you should be able to have some professional trust that the recipes they share are – at the very least – not completely horrifying.

That’s not the case with this recipe from chef Molly Yeh, who is completely adorable and typically super duper charming.

Image Credit: Food Network

Yep, super cute.

But you know what’s NOT super cute? This mess.

Image Credit: Food Network

No one on Twitter, though, is being charmed by the combination of popcorn and mayonnaise.

Yeh is an American cookbook author, blogger, and host of the Food Network cooking show Girl Meets Farm. She incorporates her Jewish and Asian heritage into her cooking, with a sprinkle of Midwestern for good measure, and everything usually comes out looking delicious.

That said, this monstrosity of mayonnaise, popcorn, and various vegetables?

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

Image Credit: Food Network

“Popcorn salad is one of those classic Midwestern dishes that you would often find in a church basement potluck.”

I’m sorry… I live in the Midwest and I have NEVER heard of this. From anybody. Anywhere.

Now, while Molly admits that the ingredients sound weird, she swears that the final result is delicious. Her salad included peas, carrots, shallots, mayo, sour cream, apple cider vinegar, sugar, and Dijon mustard – and, of course, the popcorn.

She finished the dish off with some watercress and celery leaves.

Image Credit: Food Network

The friends she invited over expressed surprise – even the ones from the Midwest, where the dish is supposedly popular – but swore they were pleasantly shocked at the result.

The good people of the internet think everyone involved are lying liars, as is evidenced by their hilarious replies.

I mean…does that look like an honest face to you?

This is not what you bring to a gathering, my friends. Not unless you want to get hurt.

That’s probably where plates of this are going to end up. Rightfully so.

You do have to get behind that idea, I don’t care who you are.

The video has gone completely viral, with over 3M views, and not one person has said they’re thinking about trying it.

How to Make Molly's Crunchy Snap Pea Popcorn Salad

Def going to start adding POPCORN to every single salad now, Molly Yeh! Croutons, who?! ???Watch #GirlMeetsFarm, Sundays @ 11a|10c and subscribe to discovery+ to stream #GirlMeetsFarm and so much more: http://discoverypl.us/34WCE6K. #discoveryplusGet the recipe for Crunchy Snap Pea Popcorn Salad: http://foodtv.com/3bfDOfS.

Posted by Food Network on Tuesday, February 16, 2021

What about you? Is this going on your “must try” Pinterest board?

I’m from the Midwest. My parents are from the Midwest, and that story goes back for several generations, and no one – not one person – has ever thrust a popcorn salad into my hands at a potluck.

I don’t think I’ll be the one to start the tradition.

I’m just saying.

The post Check Out the Viral “Popcorn Salad” Recipe That Has People Horrified appeared first on UberFacts.

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Did You Know Lifeguards in Los Angeles Can Make More Than $350,000 a Year?

I’m a Midwesterner, so when I think about lifeguards, what comes to mind is teenagers who compete on their school’s swim teams and who also earn some summer cash watching over kids (and adults) at the local swimming holes.

It turns out that on the coasts, though, policing the oceans can be an actual job that pays really, really well.

Auditors at OpenTheBooks.com compiled numbers from Freedom of Information Act requests and data listed with Transparent California, and found that nearly 100 lifeguards in the state made over $200,000 in 2019.

Image Credit: iStock

The top earner, “acting chief lifeguard” Fernando Boiteux, made a whopping $391,971 once all of his salary, overtime, perks, and benefits were included.

The runner-up was one Captain Daniel Douglas, who made $140,706 in base salary, $131,493 in overtime pay, $21,760 in “other pay,” and $74,709 in benefits – that’s a total salary of $368,668, if you don’t want to do the math yourself.

Thirty-one of the lifeguards listed made between $50,000 and $131,493 in overtime in 2019 – a fact that might have taxpayers wondering why they’re footing the bill for so much overtime when their taxes (to the tune of $45 billion a year) already go toward the state public employee’s salaries.

Image Credit: iStock

And get this – even though lifeguards do sign up for a dangerous job that’s high-stress in many scenarios, the majority of the top earners are not the same lifeguards who were awarded for their heroism.

For example, 2020 Medal of Valor winner Edward “Nick” Macko “only” earned $134,144 that year, ranking 167th out of 1001 employees. He earned the medal by jumping into rough waters in a remote gorge in order to pull a man to safety, saving him from potentially crushing his skull on razor-sharp rocks.

The 2019 winners, Shaun Gudmundsson and Ruben Carmona, earned “just” $165,761 and $194,919 respectively. The performed a dangerous nighttime rescue of two trapped fishermen as hurricane conditions affected both tides and surf.

Image Credit: iStock

If you’re wondering, only two of the top twenty highest earners were women, and no, pool lifeguards don’t make nearly as much – only around $50K including all of their pay and benefits.

Still, it’s a much more lucrative gig that I ever imagined.

And you can still work on your tan while you scan the waters waiting to be a hero.

That’s allowed, right?

The post Did You Know Lifeguards in Los Angeles Can Make More Than $350,000 a Year? appeared first on UberFacts.

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Hilarious Tweets We’re Pretty Confident Will Make You LOL

We feel very confident today, amigos.

We believe that we have curated an incredibly strong collection of tweets today for you to enjoy immensely.

And they’re funny, too! So that means you’re gonna laugh, too!

What else could you possibly ask for?!?!

Well, I guess we technically could ask for a bunch of other stuff, but we don’t want to come off as greedy, do we?

So here’s how this is gonna work: you’re gonna sit back, take off your shoes (and your pants, if you want to), kick your feet up, and have some laughs. It’s as easy as that!

1. I’m with you!

It can be hard to stop sometimes…

2. I’ve wondered this my entire life.

Who’s holding everyone up?!?!

3. Hold your breath.

Well, how else are you gonna listen to that conversation?

4. Really blew that one, huh?

Well, you gave it your best shot.

5. I don’t think you’re alone on this one.

Ladies, let’s hear from you!

6. Join the club.

I don’t even like my own family members anymore.

7. Oh, isn’t that sweet?

I thought you were gonna say something else…

8. I’ll go ahead and start.

Well, I’m sorry to hear that.

9. This is a good plan.

It’s called REVENGE.

10. I love a nice father and son relationship.

I love you, Dad!

11. It’s gonna go one of two ways…

Either way will be worth it.

12. That’s very impressive.

I think you just got hired!

Have you seen any hilarious memes lately?

Well, don’t keep them all to yourself!

Share them with us in the comments! Thanks!

The post Hilarious Tweets We’re Pretty Confident Will Make You LOL appeared first on UberFacts.