Parents With Multiple Kids: These Funny Tweets Are for You

Parents with more than one kid, we feel your pain, and we want to provide you with some comic relief.

You’ve been putting up with a helluva lot this year and we believe that is our duty to give you a break and make you laugh.

Let me paint a picture for you and you tell me if this sounds familiar: your house has become a war zone, with the kids fighting, which leads to you fighting with your partner, which leads to the entire household becoming a bubbling cauldron that is just waiting to explode!

Does that describe your household?

That’s what I thought!

So take a break from the madness and laugh at some funny tweets!

Let’s go!

1. Isn’t that adorable?

They really love each other!

2. It’s just not the same.

Parents, does this look familiar?

3. Don’t act like you’re shocked.

We know about the old days…

4. That’s a good plan.

But it could backfire…

5. Kids and dieting.

Some of the lessons are interchangeable.

6. Have you read the manual?

It’s all in there!

7. Sometimes, you have to pretend.

But you’re really impressed.

8. Oh, it’s on.

Who will get there first?!?!

9. Not really the same…

But keep telling yourself that…

10. Not looking good.

These kids are pretty smart…

11. A good tip.

Pay attention to this one!

12. Sick burn!

Feel free to use it.

13. This sums it up.

You fight just BECAUSE, okay?

Okay, now we want to hear from all the readers out there who have kids!

How are you holding up? Are you about to lose your marbles during these crazy times?

Talk to us in the comments and let us know what’s up!

The post Parents With Multiple Kids: These Funny Tweets Are for You appeared first on UberFacts.

Get Your Bark on With These Wonderful Dog Memes!

Dogs, dogs, everywhere there are dogs.

Do you ever find yourself singing this in your head to the theme of that famous song “Signs”?

Of course you do, you’re only human! And I do it, too!

And we do it because we have DOGS on our minds ALL DAY LONG. It’s only natural, because dogs are one of the greatest things we get to enjoy in our lives. They bring us so much joy and can brighten even the darkest day that we might have on any given day.

So what do you say that we honor our furry friends with some funny and adorable memes, okay?!?! Let’s get it started!

1. A very judgmental pooch.

This look says it all…

2. I’ve never seen this before.

But I’d sure like to!

3. I want this dog in my life.

And I want it NOW.

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PLEASE READ @doggomemes_daily Important announcement – please read. First of all we want to thank you for 175k follows and all the love and support you have shown to us through our journey. For most of you our page is to lighten up the day with funny and wholesome memes, but not everyone seems to be on the same page and we have unfortunately received countless of reports lately. Even tho all of our content is family friendly, some of our memes were removed anyway and the account is under a risk of deletion. Since we don't want to lose all of this, our community, we've decided to make a second page as a backup and post there too. Please follow our backup @doggomemes_daily just in case. And thank you again ❤ #lovedogs #doggo #dogmeme #dogmemes #doggomeme #dog #dogsofinstagram #pet #petsofinstagram #petstagram #doglover #puppies #puppiesofinstagram #adoptdontshop #dogstagram #dogs #dogsdaily #dogsdayout #dogmemes #doggomemes #memesdailyish

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4. Immediately in a good mood.

It works every time.

5. Awww. Loyal pup.

They really are the best.

6. You earned yourself a job.

You gotta love it!

7. A very unique pooch!

The unicorn dog!

8. Ummmm, did you find it?

This has to be the place!

9. Thank the gaming doggo.

It works!

10. I can do that tongue thing.

You’re hired!

11. What kind of monster would do this?

But we’re glad she is still here and helping others!

12. It sure does!

What a great smile.

13. Pop quiz, hotshot.

This is the kind of quiz I would like to take.

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#doggomemes #doggomeme #dogmemes #dogmeme #doggo

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Those were great! And now we want to hear from you!

Share a photo of your furry best friend in the comments with us.

And tell us a little bit about them as well.

We can’t wait to meet all these guys and gals!

The post Get Your Bark on With These Wonderful Dog Memes! appeared first on UberFacts.

Enjoy These Funny Tweets About the Realities of Parenting Siblings

Oh, moms and dads…we can only imagine the trials and tribulations that you’re experiencing right now.

Especially if you have MORE THAN ONE KIDDO to look after during these unprecedented and turbulent times.

You’re trapped in the house with no escape and, as you can probably guess, the kids are at each others’ throats…and then that spills over to the parents who then lose their minds and turn on each other, etc.

The whole thing is just a huge fiasco!

But, at least you can laugh with some of these funny tweets from parents who are parenting siblings…let’s take a look.

1. Yeah, pretty much.

You know it’s gonna end badly…

2. You know that’s the truth!

We’ve all been there before.

3. This is gonna get ugly.

Let the crying commence.

4. Back and forth.

It’s a non-stop tug of war.

5. Please, stop! It’s gonna be okay!

Stop before Mom gets here!

6. An offer you can’t refuse.

I’d like to know the outcome of this.

7. You don’t have a choice.

You’ll do it and you’ll like it!

8. Maybe in the shin?

This is a tough one…

9. That doesn’t really help…

And that’s not what I meant.

10. Sounds delicious!

And delightful!

11. We’ll be back.

But let’s try to save time, okay?

12. Just stop it!

Didn’t really see that coming…

13. Fight to the death.

Just like the WWE.

14. Ain’t that the truth?

Happens every single time.

How about you, moms and dads?

Are your kids driving you a little bit nuts right now?

Talk to us in the comments and tell us how it’s going!

The post Enjoy These Funny Tweets About the Realities of Parenting Siblings appeared first on UberFacts.

Funny Tweets About Parenting Siblings

As someone who grew up in a house with four siblings, I can only imagine the daily hell that we put our parents through, now that I’m older and a little bit wiser.

There were certain days where all five of us kids were fighting, screaming, and threatening to run away. Good times! And I’m sure that my mom and dad were just delighted to be dealing with that kind of BS after working all day to put a roof over our heads and food on the table.

Mom and dad, I apologize and I’m still trying to make it up to you…and yes, I’m still the best child of the bunch.

Parents with multiple kids, these tweets are for you…enjoy.

1. That’s a long story.

Because we love them more than you…

2. It was an accident!

I swear!

3. Let all of them play.

Gonna need to talk to the city about this.

4. Stop it!

You are crossing the line.

5. Middle child gets it again.

It’s the “Jan Brady” syndrome.

6. It’s all mine now.

But I swear it was an accident.

7. Learn from your mistakes.

I mean…your gifts…

8. Not strange anymore.

Never thought you’d be here, did you?

9. All the small things.

Those can really set them off.

10. You’re just not ready yet.

But keep working at it!

11. Honesty is the best policy.

But still…

12. We’ll find him eventually.

Just don’t worry about it, okay?

13. I cannot tell a lie.

Well, they got you there.

Okay, parents, now we want to hear from YOU.

In the comments, tell us how it’s been going since the lockdown started with your kiddos.

We can’t wait to hear from you!

The post Funny Tweets About Parenting Siblings appeared first on UberFacts.

Funny Dog Memes to Get Your Day Headed in the Right Direction

I heard someone say once that you should never, under any circumstances, ignore your dog or ever treat them badly because WE are the most important things in their lives.

They can’t wait for us to get home when we leave, they light up with excitement every single time they see us, and we should do the same for them!

Because, sadly, they’re not here for very long so we should do everything in our power to make their lives as enjoyable as possible. What I’m trying to say is that it’s all about the love, baby.

So give your pups a squeeze for us and enjoy these great memes!

1. I hope that’s not the case!

I think they’re just giving us kisses.

2. Pick your gift.

They’re sweet AND smart.

3. Really? Right now you have to do this?

Gee, thanks a lot.

4. I support this 100%.

I hope this dog runs for President.

5. You knew that was gonna happen.

I’m jealous!

6. Awwww. Cute.

He still loves it!

7. This is perfect.

That’s really all you need.

8. He sure does.

And we all agree!

9. Not a fan of this thing.

Get rid of it!

10. Call the dog advice hotline if you need to.

They really do great work.

11. You’re not fooling them.

But nice try…

12. Put on that smiley face.

You can vent when work is over.

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?

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13. I feel you, buddy.

It’s pretty exhausting out there.

View this post on Instagram

2020 mood

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Will you do us a big favor?

In the comments, share a photo of your pooch and tell us a little bit about them.

We love meeting as many new pups as possible!

Thanks in advance!

The post Funny Dog Memes to Get Your Day Headed in the Right Direction appeared first on UberFacts.

People Share the Hilarious Things That Were Blurted Out When Children Were Born

For a lot of people, there’s nothing more natural or terrifying than childbirth. Is the baby going to come out alright? Is the mom gonna make it? Will the dad pass out or not?

And when it comes to this Ask Reddit thread… nothing was held back. And I mean… nothing.

Doctors, nurses who deliver babies, what are some strange/funny things people have screamed while giving birth? from AskReddit

From surprise genders to raptor babies to some REALLY inappropriate things… these stories have got it all!

Let’s take a look.

1. Surprises abound!

My dad has told me they thought I was a girl all the way up to birth.

I came out as a c-section and the doctor goes “huh, this ones got extra equipment.”

2. Once you get there…

I am not an obgyn but I was questioning a patient in the ER about some other health problem, she wasn’t carrying at that time. When I got to the part about the gynecological history I asked how many kids did she have and how were they born. She had two kids and were both born with C-section. I should clarify that this was in Spain and the patient was gypsy, now gypsies are not usually well educated and women often marry young and don’t finish school, they also talk weird.

Now, the lady told me she had 2 kids and 2 c-sections and I asked her why she had to deliver by c-section she said because the first kid was a “come coño”.

Well, this can be translated as “p*ssy eater.” This lady was convinced that her first child was going to eat her pussy and had to be taken out before he did.

You can imagine my surprise.

At first I didn’t understand and left the room after the questioning still puzzled. I went and started digging in her file and found out that the c-section had to be done because after she broke water the doctors noticed the amniotic fluid was filled with baby sh*t, usually when a baby shits in-utero, it is a sign that the baby is suffering and has to come out quick, that was why she had a c-section. Now here is why it is funny:

  1. In-utero baby shit is called meconio.
  2. The doctors probably told this lady that she had to get a c-section because the baby comes with meconio
  3. Comes with meconio = “viene con meconio” in spanish.
  4. “Viene con meconio” sounds a lot like “viene comecoño” (p*ssy eater)
  5. Imagine being told your whole life that your mom had to get a c-section because you were going to eat her p*ssy when you actually almost died at childbirth.

I know it must not be that funny in English but I did my best translating it and hope some of you see how funny it was for me.

3. Well, that happened!

One lady was too posh to swear when in pain from contractions, she just said “jeepers creepers.”

4. Haha… can you imagine??

When I was born, my dad didn’t know that babies are usually born face down.

And as I was coming out he screams “OH MY GOD SHE DOESN’T HAVE A FACE.”

5. Let’s go higher!

I was high on meds at the time, I was begging for BBQ ribs in between contractions.

“C’mon, honey! The nurses will never know!”

They were standing right there.

6. Oh snap… that’s hilarious

Apparently, when my aunt was giving birth, she was all jokes.

Very angry jokes, but jokes none-the-less.

KNOCK-KNOCK! WHO’S THERE?! THE BABY! NOT YET!

7. Dino baby!

Not a doctor, but a father.

When my first child was born his head was kind of misshapen, and when the doctor lifted him up to show my wife she yelled “why the f*ck does he look like a raptor?”

I lost it.

8. Perfect timing

EMT who did a birth on the side of the road.

Woman shouted “f*ck me!” during a contraction and the husband casually replied “that’s how we got into this mess, dammit!”.

I had a very hard time containing myself.

9. Nope! Time to go!

Patient fully dilated, started pushing, then changed her mind. “I don’t wanna do this, I’m going the f*ck home.”

And then tried to get off the table.

10. Haha… gurl…

When my sister was in labor, she was screaming and our mom was trying to be comforting:

“It’ll be OK. Take some deep breaths. It’ll be over soon.”

Then my sister looks up at our mom and says “You have no idea what this is like.”

11. It’s not a tumor!

Paramedic here: Delivered a baby for a lady who did not realize she was pregnant and called us for ‘abdominal pain’

Patient: ‘You are an idiot! I am not f*cking pregnant’

Me: ‘Well, I can see a head crowning’

Patient: That must be a f*cking tumor!

The tumor was a healthy baby girl. Mom was totally sweet afterwards btw.

12. Bad timing…

My roommate and I just finished our labor and delivery rotation in July.

During one of the births she was helping out in, the mom and the dad were separated but still good friends. So while this woman is pushing out her baby she begins to half tell/half scream that my roommate should date her ex/the baby daddy. The conversation went something like this:

Mom: You should really….(screams in pain)….go out with….(Screams again) him sometime. He’s really fun.

Dad: I wouldn’t mind some drinks sometime, what are you doing this evening?

No, she did not go out with him.

13. Is that even possible?

I’m white, Irish ancestry so I had red hair when I was a child, and my wife is black.

Her sister was also in the delivery room. When the baby crowned her sister told her she could see the baby’s hair. My wife who can barely breathe blurted out, “The hair isn’t red is it?!”

Apparently she was terrified the baby would be black with red hair.

14. She’ll never live that down

My mothers labour was extremely short, I was born within an hour. So that means that she went from experiencing minimal pain, to extreme pain with little time to adjust.

When my dad was driving her to the hospital, he unfortunately had to stop for gas. He went into pay, and just then an elderly man in a wheelchair stopped him, asking him to buy cigarettes for him as the store was not wheelchair accessible.

My mom then proceeded to lean out the window, yelling “DON’T HELP THE CRIPPLE.”

We have never let her forget that one.

15. Get the tongs!

When my brother was born, they had to use forceps to get him out.

My mom saw them and screamed “THOSE ARE SALAD TONGS! YOU ARE NOT PUTTING ANY GODD*MN KITCHENWARE IN THERE!”

I am seriously crying laughing. The things people say at their most vulnerable are comedic gold, right?

Do you have a story as crazy/silly as this? Let us know in the comments!

The post People Share the Hilarious Things That Were Blurted Out When Children Were Born appeared first on UberFacts.

Postal Workers Share the Things We Can Do That Would Really Help Them Out

With all the stuff that’s currently going on with the US postal service, it’s a wonder that anybody is a mail carrier at all. But, thankfully, we have a bunch of brave folks who continue to soldier on regardless of the circumstances so we can get our much needed mail.

That’s why one person on Reddit asked this question:

Postal Workers of Reddit: What do you need right now? How can we brighten your day when we see you on our routes? from AskReddit

Personally, I LOVE that this question exists because we really could do a lot more for our folks in light blue… and it doesn’t take a lot of work.

Let’s find out more…

1. It’s not hard

Husband delivers mail and he loves just about anything people do.

From pictures drawn from kids along the route to thank you letters to cold water and ding dongs.

He is appreciative of it all!!

2. That’s cool! Literally!

You could buy them a battery powered mini fan that clips to something in their truck. Some wear water vests to keep cool.

Yes, postal employees can accept gifts up to $20

Here’s the policy: https://about.usps.com/postal-bulletin/2012/pb22349/html/cover_025.htm

3. Cooling down seems to be a trend…

Former carrier here.

Had one house that always left me a bottle of ice cold water.

Highlight of that route!

4. Basic. Human. Kindness.

My father has been a postal worker for decades.

What makes him smile the most is when people just reach out and be nice and friendly. He would always tell us stories about the people who would put a smile on his face.

Notes/cards go a long way. But also just say hi and ask them how their day is going.

5. Make their jobs easier.

Former mail carrier here, #1 get a bigger mail box lol.

Water and treats are nice, but a box they don’t have to get out at to deliver things is the gift that keeps on giving.

6. Games!

Cold drinks and maybe a bag of chips or something. I’m a current carrier and seeing that stuff can completely brighten our day. Also just saying hi, or leaving a note saying thank you.

I have a customer who plays tic tac toe with me. That’s pretty fun.

Honesty anything helps and please be friendly and understanding if something is late or missing. As of right now a lot of this stuff is out of our control. It’s coming straight down from up top and there isn’t a lot we can do about it ourselves.

7. The bigger the box…

I also agree that a big mailbox is an amazing option especially if you order a lot of small packages, but don’t feel like you have to replace your mailbox.

If something happens to your box or you’re looking for a new one, consider getting a larger box.

8. Pants pls!

Carrier here!

All I ask is for the love of God PLEASE WEAR PANTS WHEN ANSWERING THE DOOR!… I’ve had straight up naked dudes sign for there package without batting a eye…oh the stories of awkwardness I could tell you guys.

Oh also smiles and friendliness is appreciated ? ..but with clothes on…

9. Help them help you

Put numbers on your damn mailbox/house. Send cards/legit letters to people. Tear down your POS lockbox that nothing fits into and get an actual mailbox.

Say hello but don’t hold me up for a half-hour bc I don’t have time to lose. Buy stamps. If you see the mailman struggling with your giant ass refrigerator box, help, don’t just watch from your porch.

And for the LOVE OF GOD, STOP ASKING IF ITS HOT ENOUGH FOR ME OUT HERE.

10. Control those pups!

Okay… I know the whole joke about “ahhh dogs hate mailmans dogs go brrrrrr”

But please do keep your dogs inside… it scares the mail ?

11. Wow! That’s so nice!

I’m a big Jimmie Johnson fan the Nascar driver, today I opened a box and there was a signed Jimmie Johnson hat with a note saying it was for me.

That has brightened my whole week, but water or Gatorade, snacks always appreciated. However I would recommend writing a note saying it’s for the mailman as a lot of times items are left in a box and we are unsure.

One Christmas I totally thought a gift was for me and it wasn’t. ?

12. It’s the little things!

I’m a carrier and I can tell you the cutest thing I see with the men in my office is the pure joy on their face when they reveal all the drinks/snacks they were given on their routes.

They are so excited to take their treasures home to show the family. They even take pictures and post them on Facebook.

As for me I love being squirted with a hose. A garden hose that is!

13. Yum!

My dad and his dad were rural carriers.

My dad’s favorite treat he received was peanut brittle made by different ladies on his route. If we were lucky he would bring it home to us! When I was little I would ride with him and get to meet tons of folks on his route. And yes, he loved the really big mail boxes.

Back then there was no UPS – he delivered everything, including live chicks. Oh, stories to tell.

14. Legit advice!

Yoooooooo Let me chime in, Postal worker here!

STOP YELLING AT ME WHEN I CAN NOT FIND YOUR PACKAGE!!!! We get mail from UPS AND Fedex and sometimes it’s already comes all fu*ked up or they lost it…but we are last to touch it, then customers hate us for thinking we damaged the package or lost it.

MAKE SURE YOU PUT YOUR ADDRESS CORRECTLY ALONG WITH APT # (if you live in an apartment) Many many times we get packages and they don’t have an apartment number, and you know how big apartment complexes can get, so how do you expect us to find where it goes ?? Just so you guys know when it does not have an apartment number it’s get returned to sender.

Also that sh*t where it takes photos of the letters your suppose to get and it sends a pic to you, we don’t even know where the picture is taken it could be from the originating city/country, countless times people come pick up there mail and they say “where’s this letter ?!” Then proceed to show me the picture like they think I’m keeping their dam mail, it usually comes a day or so later.

STOP TRYING TO SCAM US Looking at you people who sell sh*t on eBay, we know you paid for postage for 5 lbs when In reality it weighs 30 lbs, you cheap asses !

BE PATIENT!!! many times customers come in bitching that “ooooh my package should have been delivered already” so I track that sh*t and it still has not even left the city it’s coming from just cause it says ARRIVAL AT UNIT does not means it’s out for delivery ? “Mam your package has not even left Philadelphia!”

There’s probably more but this is all I could think about right now. Any questions lemme know.

15. They’re thinking about you…

When the quarantine was just getting started, a few of my customers left me a note in their mailbox.

Just a friendly thanks and reminder that I am appreciated being out there during these hard times, making sure people get their mail and packages.

I’d say this small kindness would be much appreciated again with all of this political nonsense interfering with my career. ✌?

So, it seems like they want a little bit of kindness, a lot of cold water, and maybe some bigger mailboxes.

Got all that? Think you can help out?

Let us know what you do for our postal workers in the comments OR… what you will do going forward!

Thx fam!

The post Postal Workers Share the Things We Can Do That Would Really Help Them Out appeared first on UberFacts.

People Share Really Bad Things They’ve Heard Teachers Say in Front of Classes

When you were in school, was there ever an incident where a teacher lost their cool and said some pretty scandalous things in front of a class?

Or maybe they just said something totally inappropriate in front of students for another reason?

It really does happen all the time! And we’re about to hear a whole bunch of stories about this kind of stuff!

Let’s see what folks on AskReddit had to say about bad things they heard teachers say in front of classes.

1. Oh my…

“College history professor called me a mongrel after finding out I’m mixed race.

The class laughed awkwardly with me.”

2. Don’t be lazy!

“Class mate explained he couldn’t get through the 20-page assignment in time due to his dyslexia, Old-timey teacher says ” there’s no such thing, you’re just lazy”.

Only about 6 or 7 years ago, too.”

3. I hope they got fired.

“Looked at a mentally handicapped girl and muttered “retard” just loud enough for a few people at the front to hear.”

4. Psycho.

“I had a teacher when I was 13/14 years old that said to a girl of the class she was going to end up prostituting. In front of the whole class.

Same teacher said to an other girl that she was going to end up working at McDonald’s if she kept having bad grades.

Same teacher told the whole class our parents were “ungrateful to the pedagogic team that takes care of their children” because she didn’t receive any chocolates for Christmas.”

5. Jeez…

“A teacher once got fired because at the end of a workshop class she asked all the black students in the class to stand up, told them that they would be staying behind to clean the workshop after class and then dismissed all the white students.”

6. Harsh.

“At the start of class our teacher just sat in silence for five minutes, we waited for him to begin. He then said “you have just wasted five minutes of your life. You will never get that time back”

A bit harsh on a class of nine year olds.”

7. Oops!

“Assembly in front of the whole school (ages 3 and up).

Let it slip that Santa isn’t real.”

8. What are you doing here?

“I don’t know why there are so many girls in this class. You’re supposed to be married and have children already”

–11th grade advanced physics teacher.”

9. Brutal.

“I was 13. 7th grade. My homeroom teacher was Mr. Baker.

I lived in a neighborhood a few blocks away from a park and I was finally old enough to get to walk there myself. I was overweight and I had started walking there almost every day.

I would walk the track for hours and then walk back home. It was a positive for me and would have probably led to healthier choices down the line. One day during free period he called out my name. In front of my entire homeroom, kids I’d known my whole life plus a few new people, he told me that he had seen me walking down the road.

Laughing now, he said that he to wait ten minutes for me to move out of the way because I was blocking half the road. Most of the class laughed with him. I had to sit there, holding everything in until the bell rang. Then I went to the bathroom and sobbed. I never walked to the park again. I was afraid to leave my house for a really long time.

That sh*t was so uncool and f*cked me up for a long time. People really suck for absolutely no reason and it’s just a thing we have to accept and I hate it.”

10. Blow up.

“I had a religion teacher in high school named Mr. Nguyen, who was working on becoming a Jesuit priest, and was a really cool guy. He always had a smile on his face and did his best to make class a fun experience for everyone.

There was a kid in my class who was a really annoying smart *ss, but Mr. Nguyen was always really patient with him, until one day he pushed him too far. I forgot exactly what the kid said, but it definitely crossed the line.

Mr. Nguyen slammed his fists on his desk and shouted, “Why can’t you EVER shut the fu*k up!” He then picked up his stapler and chucked it at the kid, missing his head by a few inches and leaving a huge dent in the wall and then stormed out into the hallway.

I had never seen a teacher blow up like that and I definitely never expected it from him.”

11. It’s a deal!

“Alcoholic English teacher in 9th grade: if you buy me a Johnnie Walker black, you are guaranteed to pass the class.”

12. Over the line.

“Had a fairly new teacher. She’d been with is a few months and it was her first year teaching.

There was a dude who was acting up in class. Teacher wound up yelling at him “(Name)! Would you just shut the f*ck up!?”

Felt so bad for that teacher. She legit started crying and apologizing. She was convinced she was going to get fired. The dude she yelled at was well known as being a clown.

He actually went to the admins and told them he 100% deserved it and it wasn’t her fault at all. Everything turned out fine.”

13. An honest mistake.

“In front of a class of 13 year olds a female teacher asked a student to go ask a Male teacher if he had any floppy d*cks.

She meant floppy discs.”

14. This is awful.

“Man old teachers can be the worst.

We had an old German substitute teacher at my high school. Like so old it looked like he could collapse at any given time. He told us about how he used to be a Nazi back in WWII. I guess this is also the time to mention that my school was predominantly white.

We had maybe 20 black students total. The sub had asked one of these students to bring him a stapler or something like that, which the student the brought him. His response, which got him fired immediately, was something like “Wow I didn’t expect one of your kind to be helpful. A lot of you people are like monkeys.”

Pretty sure the only reason that student didn’t punch him in the face is because the teacher would’ve crumbled.”

Now it’s your turn!

In the comments, tell us about the worst things you’ve ever heard a teacher say in front of a classroom.

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The post People Share Really Bad Things They’ve Heard Teachers Say in Front of Classes appeared first on UberFacts.

People Share the Worst Things They’ve Heard Teachers Say in Front of Classes

I feel bad about this now, but I remember that way back in my Freshman year of high school in gym class, we were misbehaving, and a substitute teacher totally lost her sh*t, told us to “f*ck off” and walked out.

Wow! That was quite a moment. Of course, a bunch of 14-year-old boys thought it was pretty funny at the time, but now I realize that she must’ve been going through a hard time…or maybe she just had a terrible temper.

Whatever the case, the point is that sometimes teachers say bad things in front of classes.

Here’s what AskReddit users had to say about this.

1. Never had it.

“During English class we were watching Tomorrow When the war began. Those of you who have seen the movie know they start the movie talking about s*x.

The teacher goes, ‘S*x is not that great, I have actually not had s*x’ He’s a full 30 year old man and says that to a bunch of 13-14 year olds.

Those were the days…”

2. That doesn’t sound right.

“Freshman year in high school a classmate called someone a “chode” in gym class.

The gym teacher asked him what that means and the student explained “A chode is a good student”.”

3. What?!?!

““At least half of you will be dead by the time you reach 20 years old”

To a class of 11 year olds…”

4. Imagine this…

“Teacher was using an example to illustrate a concept. He was a very nice, bubbly man, we all liked him.

He points at a random student and says: “For example, Bob, imagine you’re adopted-”

About half the class cringed as they knew what Bob was about to say: “Um, I am adopted”

You could see the gears turning in the poor teachers mind omgohfuck I can’t say sorry because that implies that being adopted is bad, omgohfuck

The silence was palpable as he tried to think of something to say, he eventually just turned to another kid “….are you adopted?” “no” “Ok so, imagine Steven is adopted-” lollll poor guy.”

5. Oh, man…

“The father of a class-mate died in a motorcycle accident, he went into a corner too fast and crashed into a tree.

A couple of days after the accident (which was the first day my class-mate went to school again), our physics teacher decided that it is a good moment to teach the “speed doesn’t kill you, acceleration does”-lesson. With the example of a motorcycle driving into a tree.”

6. Uhhhh. Creepy.

“He told our whole English class quite seriously that for his 30th birthday he wanted two 15 year old girls to sit on his lap, and he even named which ones.

I don’t know what he was telling us for, maybe he thought we would pressure them into doing it or something.”

7. Good aim.

“New year, new teacher and his introduction was: “If you are loud I will hit you with the chalk”.

We all thought it was very funny but the next day we learned what doom was because he never missed.”

8. It’s Daddy.

“I had a professor that had given us an in class assignment.

He was a sh*tty teacher and we were first year students so we didn’t finish it and he told us to take it home and finish it and when we were done to “bring to me. Bring it to daddy.”

He was Greek and didn’t know the context, but he was the head of the department so we all held back our giggles and left.”

9. Rude!

“She read out my name and looks at me and says , “Your parents named you this?””

10. Awful.

“I once had a substitute teacher for my health class and he went on this long rant about how r*pe can be justified.

So many people complained about him.”

11. It’s their fault!

“I had an art teacher that got caught drinking. Apparently someone from the previous period told on her.

The vice principal came into our class and told her to come with him. We all heard her yell “they drove me to drink” from the hallway.”

12. Hahahaha. Wow!

“His name… “Harry Balls”.

No .. really.. he was a substitute teacher who wrote his name on the board and said, ” I will give you 3 minutes to laugh, but then we gotta get to work.”

13. An eye for an eye.

“Worst thing and also best thing. History class.

Kid punches the kid in front of him in the back of the head.

Teacher sees this and says, “now he’s gonna punch you in the head and your all gonna sit there and watch because there’s nothing you can do about it”.”

14. Bad teacher.

“Had an English sub.

He was clearly in a hungover state taking naps on an hourly basis. When he is awake he’s not being a good “teacher” he would cuss openly infront of the class, ask us what we were doing (we didn’t know) and one time he was hitting on some freshman girl loud enough for his flirts to be heard by the whole class.

He was later removed for “unknown” reasons.”

15. A line was crossed.

“”I’ll squeeze your balls, little man!”

It was an all guys high school and the teacher was the headmaster/a catholic brother/teacher. He was saying this as a follow up to a kid acting up and being a wise ass.

He says “oh, you think acting up means you have balls?” Kid says “yeah” amd then he responds to the kid with that gem…

Everyone was weirded out and thought a line got crossed.”

How about you?

What’s the absolute worst thing you’ve ever heard a teacher say in front of a class?

Talk to us about it in the comments!

The post People Share the Worst Things They’ve Heard Teachers Say in Front of Classes appeared first on UberFacts.