Month: March 2019

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11 People Who Have No Clue How Female Anatomy Works

Funny thing about the internet: it allows you to become famous not only for being great but also for being truly, epically, horrifically bad.

Take these bozos for example: their claim to infamy is having NO CLUE how the female body works. I mean, seriously, did they never take biology?

1. (Oris) it?

Photo Credit: Myceliemz24/reddit

2. Oh shut up and go to bed, Philip!

Photo Credit: anafuckboi /reddit

3. She’s not wrong… but he definitely is.

Photo Credit: rockservent/reddit.com

4. This is actually true. People were scared AF of trains.

Photo Credit: sgtlizzie/reddit.com

5. Not even with the tiniest “probe”

6. Pro tip. You should def try it sometime.

Photo Credit: Kore624/reddit

7. That escalated at lightning speed!

Photo Credit: aguadiablo

8. Imagine having to sit next to anybody who actually believes this?

Photo Credit: kittydarko/reddit

9. But testosterone is cool, right bro?

Photo Credit: chopstunk/reddit

10. I wonder how much cow pee this guy has consumed…

Photo Credit: cainisrealcool/reddit

11. #toodumbforlife

Photo Credit: Clementine_696/reddit

Faith in humanity NOT restored.

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Mom Calls out Anti-Vaxxers After Her Newborn is Exposed to Measles

Never as a child growing up did I think we would one day live in a world where anti-vaxxers were as big of a thing as they seem to have become these days. Even though cases of vaccines causing adverse effects are exceedingly rare, and the concern about links to autism has been thoroughly debunked, they still continue to endanger everyone else via their stubborn refusal to accept science. Thanks to anti-vaxxers, previously eradicated diseases like measles are now making a comeback.

Jennifer Hibben-White posted about her experience on Facebook. Thankfully, her son didn’t get measles, but her story should be read by every anti-vaxxer.

She starts with a picture of her son, and then the facts:

Photo Credit: Facebook

Photo Credit: Facebook

Her doctor advised her to take precautions, which left her enraged (understandably):

Photo Credit: Facebook

She directs her rage at the ones who deserve it: those who have chosen not to vaccinate their children. And she doesn’t hold back:

Photo Credit: Facebook

Hibben-White reveals the heart-breaking reason that underlies why she’s so passionate about vaccinations—the loss of her daughter at five years old. She would have done anything to save her daughter, yet people are taking their access to life-saving vaccines for granted.

Photo Credit: Facebook

Finally, she calls out anti-vaxxers on their hypocrisy:

Photo Credit: Facebook

So savage.

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Scientists Find Whiskey Makes You Live a Longer, Healthier Life. Cheers to That!

I love when science gives me a reason to drink! According to new research, drinking whiskey in moderation can yield serious benefits such as helping increase your lifespan, improving your overall health, and even boosting your creativity.

Photo Credit: Pixabay

Yes, you read that right. A study recently presented to the American Association for the Advancement of Science has found links between moderate alcohol consumption and increased life span.

Claudia Kawas, a neurologist at the University of California, Irvine, has been studying the lifestyle habits of people in their 90s for the last 15 years. Her team found that people who drank two units of alcohol daily had a lower risk of premature death.

“I have no explanation for it, but I do firmly believe that modest drinking improves longevity,” says Kawas.

Photo Credit: Pixabay

Whiskey also contains ellagic acid, an antioxidant that helps to fight cancer. In fact, whiskey actually has even more antioxidants than red wine – long held to be the reigning champion of “healthy” alcohols.

Moderate whiskey consumption (no more than six portions a week) has also been found to reduce the risks of strokes, heart attacks, and dementia by nearly half! Finally, a study by the University of Illinois also discovered that participants were more creative at a blood alcohol content of around 0.075.

Photo Credit: Pixabay

So, raise a glass to health! But just one – seriously, moderation is vital.

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7-Year-Old Destroys Bigot at Grocery Store Who Says Gay People End up in Hell

Sometimes, children catch us by surprise with their wisdom. Sure, we all know kids can say some pretty silly, random stuff that’s great for a laugh, but every so often they also say stuff that restores your faith in humanity.

Take, for instance, the story of a dad in Bath, England, whose 7 year old didn’t even bat an eye when standing up to a homophobic bigot at the supermarket.

Photo Credit: Pixabay

As the father explained, he and his son went shopping for a birthday present for a girl in the son’s class. They settled on a tiara, a fairy wand, and some pretty jewelry. As they waited in line, the son put a few of the items on and pretended to be the Queen, ordering the line to move faster.

That, apparently, was just too much to take for the jerk in the next line. Here’s how it all went down:

Son: (In a posh voice) I’m the Queen and I say this line should move faster!

(I and a few others smile at his playfulness when a man in line at the next till yells at me.)

Man: You can’t let your son do that. If he turns into a f****t it’ll be your fault.

(Everyone stops and stares at him in horror whilst the cashiers call for a manager.)

Son: What’s a f****t?

Me: It’s a nasty word that only nasty people use so you mustn’t say it.

Man: It means gay, kid.

Son: What’s gay?

Man: It means you’re bad and going to Hell for being evil.

Me: It’s when a man loves a man and a lady loves a lady.

Son: Oh, like Uncle James and Uncle Ian?

Me: Yep, just like Uncle James and Uncle Ian. They’re not bad, are they?

(My brother is a paediatric oncologist and his partner is a paediatric nurse. We’ve tried to explain what cancer is and how my brother and his partner make children feel better when they’re poorly.)

Son: My uncles make children better when they have poorly blood and poorly bones. If you make them go to Hell that means you want the children to be poorly.

(The manager and a security guard turn up but my son looks this man in the eye and holds his stare.)

Son: Do you want the children to be poorly? Do you want them to be sick and have to go to Heaven?

(Everyone is now staring at my son. The man has gone red and is looking around.)

Manager: Sir, I believe you’ve just been outwitted by a child. You should leave now and keep your disgusting views to yourself and out of my shop.

Kids like this give me hope for the future.

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15 Older People Share the Things They Actually Like about Millennials

Millennials have taken a lot of criticism from older generations, seemingly for every little thing they do. But it’s not all bad. There are plenty of things millennials do that older people actually admire, as this Reddit thread will show you.

1. Memes!

I’m 48 and I love memes. I’m facebook friends with many of my college students and I’m sometimes in tears laughing over the memes they post. I love the levels of cultural knowledge required to “get” them. Even at 48, I still feel rebelliously like I’m getting something that my parents don’t get.

2. Kindness rules

How kind and understanding they are to kids who are different.

My first grader just went to a party for a kid with Downs this last weekend. He invited his whole class and at least 2/3 of them showed up to celebrate with him. Warmed my heart.

3. Dabbing

Dabbing. I dab the f**k out of my wife and kids. I open my arms and walk to them like I’m going to hug them, then I dab away.

4. Fun music

My kids laugh because I like rap as much as they do.

They do get tired of me telling them the original sampled sources and musical roots.

5. Smashing gender divides

I’m 62, and I’m impressed that boys and girls in junior high and high school actually are friends with each other. I even saw the kids playing a quick pickup game of touch football – boys and girls – at the middle school while waiting for the bus to come over from the elementary school. Never would have happened in my generation.

6. Tolerance

You guys are tolerant as hell. I work in a school and kids can wear nerdy shit and not wonder who they’re gonna have to fight first.

Back in the 90’s I smuggled my Star Wars books into the cafeteria like I was carrying enigma machine codes.

7. Advanced technology

I am amazed that you all can play game consoles with what seems like twenty different god damned buttons on the controller. And use them all almost simultaneously!

8. More living

I like that they are less into stuff and more into experiences.

9. Acceptance

I was a teen when “gay” was still an insult.

Kids these days are so friggen cool.

10. Hilarious slang terms

Yeet. I don’t know what it is, but that word just makes me laugh. I’ll be 48 this year, and hopefully still have many years before I yeet the f**k off this mortal coil.

11. Changing priorities

Putting more of a priority on personal life and goals than on “career”. The realization that devotion to employer is a dead-end is one that not so many of my fellow Gen-Xers have cottoned to.

12. Video games are awesome now

61 years old here, and I love my video games as much as younger people.

13. No worries

The phrase “No Worries” after you apologize for a delay holding someone up. Has a much warmer feel than any other equivalent.

14. Adopt don’t shop

They adopt pets rather than buying the designer ones.

15. Keepin’ it casual

Casual dress codes!

Some of the managers are younger than me now and they do not care what anyone wears to work.

Die, high heels!

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Men Open Up about ‘Dude Stuff’ that Women Don’t Know About

When they say “Women are from Venus, men are from Mars,” it really means that each gender has such a different experience of life that there are things they’ll simply never understand about each other.

This group of guys decided to share all the “dude” stuff to shed some light on why they spend time alone or why touching the top of a doorframe is so damn important!

1. Women do the same thing…

Photo Credit: The Chive

2. Sup, man

Photo Credit: The Chive

3. Urinal 101

Photo Credit: The Chive

4. Toss it here!

Photo Credit: The Chive

5. Might want to rethink that towel

Photo Credit: The Chive

6. Everyone needs a little alone time

Photo Credit: The Chive

7. Zipper problems

Photo Credit: The Chive

8. Reach high!

Photo Credit: The Chive

9. Ouch!

Photo Credit: The Chive

10. Please just pick a place! #hangry

Photo Credit: The Chive

11. Morning aerobics

Photo Credit: The Chive

12. Shake and dance, it’s still in your pants

Photo Credit: The Chive

13. Boobies

Photo Credit: The Chive

So, ladies. Don’t sweat the small stuff!

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When His Ex Sent Him an Apology Letter, He Graded It and Sent It Back

There’s nothing worse than being cheated on. It really hurts, and that’s why anyone who’s ever been cheated on loves a good revenge tale. Well, settle in because this one is GOOD.

Nick Lutz, a student at the University of Central Florida, ended his eight-month relationship with the lady in question after he found her suspiciously hiding the names of other guys in her phone. When he also blocked her on social media, she decided to write him a four-page letter trying to win him back.

Instead of grabbing his notepad and writing her back, he grabbed a red pen and started to grade the letter.

Photo Credit: Nick Lutz

He didn’t spare any punches, beginning with a critique of her formatting choices:

Photo Credit: Nick Lutz

He also went in on her spelling mistakes and lack of citations:

Photo Credit: Nick Lutz

Additionally, he took her to task for her excessive use of fillers:

Photo Credit: Nick Lutz

Ultimately, he gave her a D- (though he did give the option of revision for half credit):

Photo Credit: Nick Lutz

Nick’s ex apparently took the grade gracefully and chose not to revise.

Photo Credit: Nick Lutz

Unfortunately, she ended up having a change of heart and reported him to UCF for disruptive conduct and cyberbullying, for which he was suspended.

He ended up having to get an attorney to appeal the suspension, which he eventually won.

Photo Credit: Nick Lutz

Legendary.

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10 Hilarious Tumblr Posts That Delighted and Terrified All of Us

I visit Tumblr religiously every day, because people on Tumblr post the most random things. A lot of those things are instantly relatable to me, so I figured I’d share some with you:

1. I wonder what his apartment looks like…

Photo Credit: deadendfairy.tumblr

2. Tanks for the memories

3. Dat ass!

Photo Credit: likeigiveabother.tumblr

4. That escalated quickly!

Photo Credit: mintsyrup.tumblr

5.  But how?

Photo Credit: beysexuality.tumblr

6. So would that be another way to lose your virginity?

Photo Credit: morgrana.tumblr

7. That’s how you get dead

Photo Credit: krafteasymac.tumblr

8. How prehistoric of you…

9. Everything about this is scary and fantastic. More please.

Photo Credit: stonebutchbliss.tumblr

10. At least you’re motivated

Photo Credit: boethiah.tumblr

You’re welcome. ?

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The only police officer…

The only police officer to arrest a sitting President was William H. West, a black Civil War veteran. He arrested President Ulysses S. Grant for speeding on his horse in 1872, for which the President paid a $20 bond.