A Genius Theory for How Clifford’s Owner Would Pick Up His Poop

filed under: Animals, books, dogs

Clifford the Big Red Dog’s size poses a lot of interesting issues for a pet owner. On the one hand, Emily Elizabeth never has to worry about him getting run over by a car; he’d be the one doing the running-over. On the other hand, how the heck does a regular-sized human deal with Big Red Dog-sized poop?

Neatorama spotted a reddit thread debating this question, and as you might expect, some people have thought long and hard about it. The thread even includes some major calculations about Clifford’s digestive output. The most feasible option, it seems, would be to train Clifford to poop in a dumpster.

Clifford is around 25 feet tall, so based on the average weight and height of a regular lab, redditor gregnuttle estimates he would weigh around 87 tons. If he was to poop in proportion to a human, by weight, that would be around 1320 pounds of dog doo a day. According to these calculations, that would be about 423 cubic feet of poo, fitting nicely into a single dumpster.

Thus, the only real answer here is to train Clifford to poop in a dumpster outside your house, and get yourself a private garbage service to come empty it every day. Your home would smell amazing, surely. Who knows what would happen if Clifford had an accident, though.

The real question is: What patch of grass could handle the volume of Clifford’s pee?

[h/t Neatorama]

Header image by Brad Barket/Getty Images


February 2, 2017 – 1:00am

11 Geeky Hats to Keep Your Noggin Warm This Winter

Image credit: 
Firebox

Ever hear that humans lose half their body heat through uncovered heads? Though that ubiquitous warning is total nonsense, a warm hat is still crucial for colder weather—because cold ears hurt. Protect your head with one of these unusual hat options.

1. MEGA MAN; $10

Make your wildest dreams come true and become Mega Man—or at least look like him. This officially licensed knitted beanie mimics the iconic helmet worn by the character. It’s currently out of stock, but it’s going to make a reappearance on the shelves in about two months.

Find it: ThinkGeek

2. UNICORN HOOD; $32

Keep yourself warm with the magic of a unicorn. This cozy hat/scarf/glove combo is perfect for staying covered up in cold weather. No actual unicorns were harmed during the making of this hood—it’s cotton and polyester.

Find it: Firebox

3. HOGWARTS HOUSE BEANIES; $20

If you put on the sorting hat, where would you end up? Probably Hufflepuff, but luckily we Muggles/No-Majs can decide for ourselves when picking out Harry Potter-themed headwear. Grab a beanie adorned with the crest of Ravenclaw, Slytherin, Gryffindor, or Hufflepuff.

Find it: Amazon

4. BLACK CAT; $16

Don’t settle for a normal ribbed knit beanie when you can have one with little cat ears and an embroidered face. It will look great with the rest of your cat lady ensemble.

Find it: ASOS

5. POKEMON; $14

Play video games in style with this black embroidered beanie. The pom-pom adorned headwear is covered in a pattern of smiling Pikachu faces.

Find it: Amazon

6. SPIDER-GWEN CONVERTIBLE HEADWEAR; $10

This tube-shaped bandana can do it all. Creative dressers can fold and knot this polyester scarf to turn it into a variety of accessories to wear on the head or neck. The headwear can be used to keep heads warm or protect identities when dabbling in some vigilante work.

Find it: ThinkGeek

7. WAMPA BEANIE; $20

Anything that lives on planet Hoth has to have a thick coat to stay warm in the arctic climate. This beanie incorporates the Star Wars creature’s white fur and horns into its design. Thanks to the double lining and ear flaps, this hat is warmer than the inside of a tauntaun.

Find it: Amazon

8. DOCTOR WHO; $15

Let this TARDIS-inspired hat transport you to a world of warmth. The ear-flapped hat fits snuggly on most heads, so Whovians of all ages can enjoy.

Find it: Amazon

9. MINECRAFT; $12 – $25

Any builder in Minecraft is familiar with the dreaded Creeper. Now you can celebrate the annoying green monsters with a threatening looking beanie. Complete the look with a Creeper scarf and you’re ready to start slinking around in the night.

Find it: Amazon

10. RICK AND MORTY REVERSIBLE BEANIE; $15

Some days you’re Rick and some days you’re more of a Morty. If you can’t decide which of the titular characters best suits you, get a beanie that can do both.

Find it: Amazon

11. FIREFLY; $24

In an episode of the short-lived sci-fi show Firefly, tough guy Jayne Cobb gets a hand-knit beanie in the mail from his mother, which he happily wears. Now you too can look like Cobb with a matching beanie that was also hand-knit.

Find it: Etsy


February 1, 2017 – 8:00pm

9 Facts About the ACLU

Image credit: 
SAUL LOEB/AFP/Getty Images

The American Civil Liberties Union is one of the most famous civil-rights organizations in the U.S., defending First Amendment freedoms for everyone, regardless of their views. Here are nine things you might not know about the almost century-old organization.

1. IT’S ACTUALLY TWO NONPROFITS.

There are two arms of the ACLU. The ACLU itself is a 501(c)(4) corporation, meaning that it is a membership organization that participates in lobbying state and federal government. Because of its lobbying status, you can’t take a tax deduction for your donations to the ACLU. But the ACLU Foundation is a 501(c)(3) organization, just like most nonprofits. Those tax-deductible donations go only toward funding litigation and education programs.

2. IT WAS FOUNDED TO SUPPORT CONSCIENTIOUS OBJECTORS.

Created as the Civil Liberties Bureau after World War I broke out in 1917, the ACLU was founded to, in part, oppose the creation of a draft and protect conscientious objectors to World War I, who at the time were subject to routine harassment and restrictions on what they could say for their choice to avoid service. It was initially a committee within the American Union Against Militarism, but split off due to disagreements about the organization’s vocal opposition to the government’s war policies. Then called the National Civil Liberties Bureau, it lobbied for conscientious objectors to be protected in the Selective Service Act and advised men worried about the draft. It was reorganized as the American Civil Liberties Union in 1920.

3. MANY OF ITS LAWYERS ARE VOLUNTEERS

While the ACLU does have a full-time legal staff, it relies heavily on the work of volunteer attorneys. These “cooperating attorneys” analyze proposed legislation for civil liberties issues and write commentary and complaints to government administrations and officials. As former ACLU legal director Burt Neuborne points out in a 2006 article, “one of the unparalleled strengths of the organization is the ability to mobilize literally thousands of volunteer lawyers in defense of the Bill of Rights” [PDF].

4. THE NEW YORK TIMES WAS NOT INITIALLY A FAN …

On July 4, 1917, the paper ran an editorial called “Jails Are Waiting for Them” arguing that “sensible people of good will do not make the mistake of believing that speech can be literally and completely free in any civilized country.” The author argued that “inevitably there must be restrictions on speech,” and accused the “little group of malcontents” of “antagonizing the settled policies of our Government, of resisting the execution of its deliberately formed plans, and of gaining for themselves immunity from the application of laws to which good citizens willingly submit as essential to the national existence and welfare.”

5. … NOR WAS PRESIDENT WOODROW WILSON.

Woodrow Wilson was adamant that free speech didn’t always apply during a war. Arguing for a censorship provision in the Espionage Act of 1917, Wilson wrote to a member of Congress that censorship is “absolutely necessary to the public safety.” The provision didn’t make it into the law (although in 1918 the Sedition Act was added to the same effect), but that didn’t stop the federal government from suppressing some of the activities of the National Civil Liberties Bureau. Though relations between the group and Wilson’s administration were initially friendly, in July 1917, the U.S. Postal Service banned 12 of the NCLB’s pamphlets promoting civil liberties from being sent in the mail. In 1918, the Wilson administration found the bureau’s work in violation of the Espionage Act because it encouraged men to refuse to participate in the draft, and its office was later raided by the Justice Department.

6. ONE OF ITS EARLIEST CASES IS ALSO ONE OF ITS MOST LEGENDARY.

The ACLU was the main driver behind the Scopes Monkey Trial, the landmark case that debated whether a teacher could defy state legislation banning the theory of evolution from public school curriculums. The case was actually a bit of a publicity stunt for the town of Dayton, Tennessee. The ACLU had placed an advertisement in the Chattanooga Daily Times offering to finance a case to challenge the law, which had been passed in 1925. Hoping to bring some fame and fortune to their town, Dayton’s leaders immediately gathered to find a suitable teacher for the role. They ended up choosing the 24-year-old John Scopes, who hadn’t actually taught biology (he was new to teaching, and taught math, physics, and chemistry his first year). He didn’t recall teaching evolution at all, in fact, but he agreed to participate anyway, and he was arrested a few days later, with ACLU member Clarence Darrow serving as his lawyer. The trial lasted just eight days, and the jury deliberated for less than nine minutes; Scopes was found guilty and fined $100.

The ACLU planned to take the case to the U.S. Supreme Court, but the verdict was later reversed due to a technicality. According to the ACLU, “the ultimate result of the trial was pronounced and far-reaching: the Butler Act was never again enforced and over the next two years, laws prohibiting the teaching of evolution were defeated in 22 states.”

7. IT’S A REGULAR FIXTURE AT THE SUPREME COURT.

The ACLU participates in more Supreme Court cases than any other private organization. ACLU lawyers represented the petitioner in the 1944 case on Japanese internment camps, Korematsu v. United States, and Mildred and Richard Loving, the interracial couple at the heart of Loving v. Virginia. The organization also regularly files amicus briefs, which are written arguments submitted to the court by someone who has an interest in the case and wants to influence the ruling but isn’t directly involved. The ACLU has filed amicus briefs in landmark cases like Brown v. Board of Education and Miranda v. Arizona.

8. ITS CLIENTS AREN’T ALWAYS LIKEABLE.

The ACLU’s crusade for freedom of speech extends to the full political spectrum—even causes that might be morally abhorrent to some of the organization’s liberal supporters. In 1978, it famously represented a Nazi group that wanted to hold a march in the heavily Jewish town of Skokie, Illinois, which included a large population of Holocaust survivors. Some ACLU members resigned over that choice, but the organization as a whole held that the principle at stake was still free speech. The case went all the way to the Supreme Court.

It has since also defended Confederate flags on license plates, online writing by NAMBLA members, the Westboro Baptist Church’s right to picket military funerals, and the Ku Klux Klan’s right to adopt a highway.

“Historically, the people whose opinions are the most controversial or extreme are the people whose rights are most often threatened,” the organization explains on its website. “Once the government has the power to violate one person’s rights, it can use that power against everyone. We work to stop the erosion of civil liberties before it’s too late.”

9. IT WASN’T IMMUNE TO THE RED SCARE

While defending Communists was a major part of the ACLU’s work in the early 20th century—it was accused of being a Communist front by the House Un-American Activities Committee—it was not entirely immune to the Red Scare’s influence. It banned Communists from serving on its board of directors in 1940, along with any other member of a “political organization which supports totalitarian dictatorship in any country.”

With that decree, it booted one of its founders, Elizabeth Gurley Flynn, who was publicly a member of the Communist Party, from the organization. It repealed her expulsion 36 years later, a dozen years after her death.

“Much of the internal rhetoric that surrounded the ACLU’s deeply principled, but controversial, decision to defend the Nazi Party’s right to march in Skokie, Illinois was driven by a fear of repeating the 1940 betrayal of principle,” Burt Neuborne wrote in his history of Flynn’s ouster [PDF].


February 1, 2017 – 6:00pm

A Long-Lost Mark Twain Fairy Tale Is Now a Children’s Book

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Mark Twain was famous for his stinging wit, but he also had a softer side. The author was the father of two daughters, Clara and Susy Clemens, and every night, he told them a bedtime story. Twain never published any of these fairy tales, but he did outline one, and called the 16-page work “Oleomargarine.” Now, The New York Times reports, publisher Doubleday is expanding the tale into an illustrated children’s book, slated for release this fall.

Researcher John Bird was perusing University of California-Berkeley’s vast Twain archives in 2011, searching for food references to add to a Mark Twain-themed cookbook. He thought “Oleomargarine” sounded like a recipe—but it turned out to be a bedtime story, written by Twain nearly 140 years ago.

“Oleomargarine” refers to a prince of the same name, who’s kidnapped by giants, and held hostage in a cave guarded by dragons. A poor boy named Johnny—who gains the power to talk to animals after eating a magic flower—embarks on a mission to rescue him.

After perusing Twain’s journals, which mentioned nightly bedtime tales featuring a boy named Johnny, Bird guessed that Twain told the story to his daughters in 1879 (third daughter, Jean, was born the following year). Susy and Clara eventually grew bored with the character, but nobody quite knows why Twain didn’t finish “Oleomargarine,” nor whether he ever planned to share it. However, experts do believe it may have been the only fairy tale that Twain—a prolific journalist, essayist, novelist, and short story writer—ever committed to paper.

Bird notified the Mark Twain House and Museum in Hartford, Connecticut, and they sold the rights to Doubleday Books for Young Readers. The publisher hired author-illustrator duo Philip and Erin Stead to expand on the work; the final product is The Purloining of Prince Oleomargarine, a 152-page book featuring original drawings.

Twain’s voice is always present, even though the book is framed as a tale “told to me by my friend, Mark Twain.” Philip Stead read a few volumes of the author’s massive autobiography to capture his natural tone, and in one scene, Twain even pops into the story and argues against the plot’s progression.

The Guardian reports that The Purloining of Prince Oleomargarine will be published on September 26, which is the 150th anniversary of Twain’s first book, the short-story collection The Celebrated Jumping Frog of Calaveras County and Other Sketches (1867).

[h/t The New York Times]


February 1, 2017 – 5:00pm

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How Does Your State Stack Up in This Year’s Well-Being Rankings?

filed under: health
Image credit: 
iStock

If you want to find a place to settle down, you could do worse than looking to this latest Gallup-Healthways report for direction [PDF]. Rather than ranking states by healthcare resources, economy, or workplace equality, the index looks at the overall well-being of each state’s residents.

Gallup surveyed over 175,000 Americans about several different criteria, such as their health, sense of purpose, sense of economic security, the quality of their relationships, and satisfaction with their home.

Hawaii ranks highest overall, with a well-being score of 65.2 out of 100 possible points. But that doesn’t necessarily mean tropical weather is the key to health and happiness: Alaska, South Dakota, and Maine occupy the next three spots. The report also includes the states with the lowest overall well-being rates. West Virginia takes last place with a score of 58.9, with Kentucky, Oklahoma, and Indiana faring only slightly better.

No matter where in the country you live, the 2016 Well-Being Index has good news for the U.S. as a whole. Overall well-being levels are at their highest since Gallup began administering the survey in 2008, with historically low smoking rates and record-high health insurance coverage. But not every area saw improvement: On the flip side, obesity, diabetes, and depression rates have also reached new heights.

[h/t CBS News]


February 1, 2017 – 4:30pm

4 Reasons Why the Weather Forecast Is Better Than Ever

Image credit: 
Jeff Swensen/Getty Images

Every year on the second day of February, the country checks in with a dorky and lovable northeastern weather forecaster to see what he has to say about the fate of the remainder of winter. It’s not Al Roker, of course, but a pampered groundhog named Punxsutawney Phil, a mythological staple of American childhoods for generations. Rooted in European folklore and brought to the U.S. in the 1800s, the tradition holds that there will be six more weeks of winter if Phil comes out of his burrow and sees his shadow. If he doesn’t see his shadow, it means we’ll have an early spring that year.

If he’s wrong—analysts can’t quite agree on his accuracy rate—authorities in Punxsutawney insist the clairvoyant groundhog prophesied the weather correctly and his interpreter simply misheard him. If only that excuse worked for meteorologists! Nobody seriously expects an accurate weather forecast from a woodchuck whispering to a guy in a tuxedo and top hat, but everybody expects accurate forecasts from the professional men and women who issue predictions every couple of hours the whole year round. Despite the annual show in rural Pennsylvania, weather forecasting is still one of those professions that’s cool to hate. That disdain is undeserved. Here are four reasons why.

1. FORECASTERS AREN’T IN CAHOOTS WITH STORES TO SELL SHOVELS AND UMBRELLAS.

It’s common for small talk to begin with the assertion that your friendly neighborhood meteorologist is a liar and a guesser, taking wild swings at a map all while stuffing their pockets with bribes from hardware stores to falsely forecast bouts of doom and gloom. Yet despite all of that supposed misinformation, most people still reliably check the weather forecast at least once a day.

The bad rap that weather forecasters get is the result of confirmation bias on the part of people repeating these myths in the first place. You’re more likely to remember an inaccurate forecast—called a “bust”—than you are to remember a forecast that was dead-on, and all those memories add up after a while, making you think that forecasts are more inaccurate than they really are.

2. WEATHER FORECASTING IS ACTUALLY PRETTY ACCURATE THESE DAYS.

The hard data backs up the fact that most weather forecasts are issued on solid footing. Some areas are harder to forecast than others. Miami’s weather is reliably monotonous, while Atlanta, just a few hundred miles away, can experience several dramatic swings in weather conditions in just one day.

Nationwide, Forecast Advisor calculates that the average accuracy rate for weather forecasts generally rests somewhere between 70 and 80 percent. This figure includes most major public and private weather outlets, including the National Weather Service (NWS), The Weather Channel, and AccuWeather. This statistic reflects the fact that meteorologists are equipped with better technology and better knowledge than ever before, allowing them to more confidently issue predictions with greater accuracy for a longer stretch of time. And forecasting is only going to get more accurate, thanks to the newest GOES satellite and a group of suitcase-sized satellites that track hurricanes, all of which launched in late 2016.

Getting three-quarters of your predictions right isn’t perfect, but weather forecasting is one of the only careers where it’s your duty to predict the future every day. There’s always going to be some unpredictability in a vast, fluid atmosphere, but our ability to anticipate its movements is slowly getting better with time.

3. TEMPERATURE FORECASTING HAS IMPROVED DRAMATICALLY IN RECENT DECADES.

The National Weather Service’s temperature forecast errors between 1968 and 2015. Image Credit: NOAA/NWS

The NWS is the official branch of the United States government that issues weather forecasts and monitors the skies to issue alerts to help the public steer clear of hazardous conditions. Like all good forecasters, the NWS keeps track of all their forecasts [PDF] and compares them to actual weather conditions through a process called verification. This data helps them figure out what they did right and improve on the forecasts that they got wrong.

One of the most interesting aspects of their forecast verification is how far we’ve come in telling temperature over the past couple of decades. According to their findings, a two-day temperature forecast in 2015 was just as accurate as a one-day forecast back in 1995. Even more astounding is that a five-day temperature forecast issued in 2015 had the same accuracy as a two-day forecast issued in 1985. That means that a high-temperature prediction issued on Monday for Friday of the same week was just as accurate in 2015 as a forecast high issued on Monday for Wednesday just 30 years ago. That’s pretty good—and it’s getting a little better each year.

4. TORNADOES ARE STILL TOUGH TO PREDICT, BUT SPOTTING THEM IS GETTING EASIER.

A radar image of a thunderstorm producing a tornado near Birmingham, Alabama, on April 27, 2011. Image Credit: Gibson Ridge

The United States sees more than a thousand tornadoes in an average year. Many of those tornadoes can occur in big outbreaks, but the vast majority of tornadoes occur without much fanfare. Unfortunately, tornadoes are the last thing you want to happen without fanfare.

Tornado warnings are common to a fault. In 2016, the NWS issued 2049 tornado warnings across the country, yet there were only about 1060 tornadoes reported through the end of the year. Assuming that about 60 percent of tornadoes received warnings—the average for the past couple of years—that means that roughly 70 percent of all tornado warnings issued last year were false alarms.

False alarms are a big deal. They have a huge impact on how people react in a dangerous situation. The official false alarm rate reported by the NWS hovers between 70 and 75 percent each year, and the “probability of detection”—whether they issued a warning for a tornado at all—has been around 60 percent for the past few years. That means that tornadoes only form in about 25 to 30 percent of all tornado warnings, and almost 40 percent of tornadoes occur outside of a warning.

Meteorologists have a long way to go on warning us about tornadoes, but they’re getting better. Weather radar is more advanced today than it was five years ago, and much better than it was through the early 1990s. Modern weather radar can detect wind speeds and foreign objects in a thunderstorm—two things that are tremendously useful in trying to spot a tornado buried in heavy rain. New advances coming out in the next decade or two will give us an even better look at tornadic thunderstorms.


February 1, 2017 – 4:00pm

Apply Now to Be an Apprentice to a Globe Maker

filed under: design, Maps
Image credit: 

Bellerby Globemakers via Facebook

Now’s your chance to get into the globe-making game. Bellerby & Co. Globemakers, a London-based globe fabrication studio, is looking for a new apprentice, according to Atlas Obscura.

The job isn’t cartography-related; it’s about the making of the globe itself, so they’re looking for someone with product design, engineering, or sculpting skills. Essentially, if you’re good at making things with your hands, they want you. Ideally, you also have some digital design skills and photo editing experience, too.

You can expect to be in training for a while. According to the job listing, it takes six months to a year to learn to make even the smallest globes by hand, and several years to make bigger ones. You’ll have to have quick fingers and a whole lot of patience. Still, your globes could end up on a Hollywood set or in a BBC production, so the years of training are worth it.

Take a look at the application here.

[h/t Atlas Obscura]


February 1, 2017 – 3:30pm

Why Was February Chosen for Black History Month?

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iStock

Every February since 1976, the United States has celebrated the achievements of African-Americans during Black History Month. The month-long celebration puts those accomplishments and milestones in focus via the media and in classrooms.

But why February? Was that part of the calendar chosen for any specific purpose?

It was. Black History Month began as “Negro History Week,” a label applied by historian Carter G. Woodson in 1926. Woodson was bothered by the fact that many textbooks and other historical reviews minimized or ignored the contributions of black figures. Along with his Association for the Study of Negro Life and History—later the Association for the Study of African American Life and History—Woodson earmarked the second week in February to raise awareness of these stories.

Woodson chose that week specifically because it covered the birthdays of Frederick Douglass (February 14) and Abraham Lincoln (February 12). The ensuing publicity led many mayors and college campuses to recognize the week; through the years, the groundswell of support allowed the occasion to stretch throughout the entire month.

In 1976, President Gerald Ford made Black History Month official, saying that he was urging everyone to “seize the opportunity to honor the too-often neglected accomplishments of black Americans in every area of endeavor throughout our history.”

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February 1, 2017 – 3:00pm