Though many justifiably call Valentine’s Day nothing more than a holiday called into existence by jewelry and greeting card companies, chocolate and flower vendors and the service industry, most couples can’t help but celebrate it anyway.
And there’s no shame in that.
Why not spend a night with complete focus on a partner and all things love and romance?
But for a variety of reasons, the holiday can still end in pure chaos.
Redditor Hamsternoir banked on that unfortunate reality when they asked:
“Waiters what Valentine day disasters have you witnessed?”
Of course, marriage proposals are frequently a piece of these stories.
“I was eating in a fine dining establishment (Chili’s) several years ago. In the next booth was a really young guy who had a big bunch of roses on the seat next to him.”
“He kept looking at his watch, looking at the roses, and popping open a ring box for a peek at the ring.”
“He did this for a half hour or so, then began calling and texting someone (presumably his girlfriend) over and over.”
“As we were waiting for our check, he hands my wife the roses, mumbled something, and walked out.”
“Poor guy.” — AZScienceTeacher
It’s even worse when there’s a secret audience.
“Not a waiter but I was a pastry chef at this big resort in cape cod. We got a special order from this guy who was coming in for his anniversary ( Valentine’s day). He wanted his desert to have ‘Will you marry me?’ written on it so he could pop the question when it came out.”
“He called ahead to the front and back kitchen, even came in himself that morning to make sure it was good to go. The whole crew was behind him. We had cooks all night coming in the ask if it had happened yet.”
“I wrote the inscription on the plate and dressed it to the nines with gold leaf and expensive chocolate. I’m taking a picture of the plate just before it’s set to go out and notice our head waiter come in with a weird look on his face.”
“He says plainly ‘They don’t need it’ “
“She broke up with him before the entrees hit the table.” — jeanlukepikard
In one case, the waitstaff became directly involved.
“There was a note in our reservations that it was an engagement, they wanted champagne, a specific seat, bunch of other stuff. The server comes up to the table with something like ‘so I read we’re celebrating an engagement, congratulations.’ ”
“Confusion from the woman; glaring from the guy. He hadn’t proposed yet. She ruined it.” — ChefHannibal
For one Redditor, the proposal remains a mystery.
“Old man proposed to old woman. He tried to get off the chair to kneel, tripped and fell and I assume broke something since he couldnt get back up and we had to call an ambulance.”
“My manager had to drive her teeth to the hospital separately because she had taken them out to eat her soup (lord knows why) and left them on the table in the confusion.” — rancid_cu**_bucket
There are, however, other versions of love lost.
“They came in at lunch the day after, so it was pretty empty but it was still for a Valentine’s Day date. They were both pretty nice at the beginning, the guy asked for a picture and whatnot.”
“As the meal went on, the dude got progressively drunker and by the time I brought the check out, the woman was gone.”
“When the dude gave me his card, he said ‘I’ll give you a bit of advice. If you’re taking a girl out to break up with her, do it at a McDonald’s and not an expensive restaurant’.” — _StanleyYelnats
Breakups aren’t always such a spectacle, though.
“These two were on a date and the guy went to go use the bathroom, The girl just up and leaves after he went to the restroom. When the guy came back he sat around for awhile until asking his waitress where she went.”
“She replied with saying that she left. The guy then asked the waitress if she would go on a date with him. The waitress said no.” — OffensiveGender
For this waiter, the relationship in question was hers.
“I was working as a waitress in a Sushi restaurant and Valentine’s Day was an all-hands-on-deck shift.”
“This guy I had just started seeing wanted to go out, but I told him that working in food service, you never get Valentine’s Day off and we’d just have to celebrate the day after or the weekend after.”
“Nope. He got so upset that he went and asked a different girl out, came to the restaurant I worked at on V-Day and sat in MY SECTION.”
“He then proceeded to spend the entire evening making a fool out of himself and making his date uncomfortable as he tried to make me jealous.”
“Needless to say we didn’t go out again. Ever.” — venustas
And there were those juicy stories of infidelity.
“In college I waited tables and Valentine’s Day was always a good one in terms of tips.”
“I once saw a couple come in to eat, halfway through the dinner the mans wife shows up to surprise the couple. The wife took the wine bottle and poured the remnants on the husbands head, took off her ring and told the girlfriend she could have him.”
“He tipped me a $100” — kobra_kyle
This one doesn’t involve a waiter, but it’s just too wild to leave out.
“I was a delivery driver for a fruit bouquet company and I had two arrangements from the same guy.”
“Routes were made for me and the truck was loaded so there was no way I could mess this up. Delivered both arrangements to the appropriate address.”
“I headed back to the store to find the store owner and the guy who sent these in an argument. This idiot put the wrong name to the houses. And it was on the card with the arrangement. Along with the phone numbers.”
“So both women called each other and then called the guy. He tried to say it was my fault. Then the person who took the order. He ordered it ONLINE. All we did was import the order.”
“I hate valentine’s day because of that place but man was that great.” — misfits90
And finally, one waiter saw them all.
“I had a section one V-day that had a marriage proposal, a 40th anniversary, and a break up all at the same time.”
“The break up was the worst. The guy brought his high class date a gift; a mini ceramic bear holding balloons. He presented it when I was at the table and she looked at it like it was a hot turd.”
“I just knew this was not going to end well. She left at the end of the meal and must have said something because he stayed at the table for another 40 minutes, head down and crying. I felt bad, he saw the celebrations going on at the other tables.” — Odd-Examination
So for those of you celebrating V-Day this year, consider a few lessons: propose in private, don’t use the day to save a relationship, and if you’re cheating, beware!
(they/them) (@partlycara) 
she had just walked out the door so I came out behind her and threw the quarters back at her lmao my manager was not pleased
(@DontKERAboutyou) 
