These Tweets Show Prove That the Dating World Sure Is Rough

Dating can really be a drag. Especially these days with all the dating apps and the pressure to find the right person.

And once you do commit to a date, you never know who you’ll be dealing with for the evening. There are a lot of weirdos out there…

Let’s hear some dating stories that might make you get rid of your Tinder app once and for all.

1. That wasn’t nice.

2. Was he impressed?

3. That’s a power move in my book.

4. They sound like a solid group of fellas.

5. Joke’s on you.

6. Trying to seal the deal.

7. Date = Over.

8. I don’t know…

9. He was a gem.

10. Thanks for letting me know.

11. Just trying to relate.

12. Not even mad.

13. How do you even get that pronunciation?

14. Are you still an idiot?

15. Okay, that’s really bad.

Ugh, those tweets definitely brought back some painful memories for me…

How about you? Have you had a hard time in the dating world?

Open up to us in the comments. We’re here for you!

The post These Tweets Show Prove That the Dating World Sure Is Rough appeared first on UberFacts.

These Comments from Grandparents Should Keep You Laughing

Grandparents are the best! They tell stories from the “good old days” and give awesome fashion advice. Take a gander at these Reddit users and the hilarious things they learned or heard from their older loved ones.

1. I don’t get it

My dad calls dubstep “The Devil’s Dialup Tone” or just “The Garbage Disposal.” He’s had a couple more, but he uses those a lot.

Also, whenever he has to go to the bathroom, he says, “I have to poop like a park ranger.” I still don’t get it.

2. Just go!

I take my grandma out to run her errands and get her out of the house for a while. One day we were in a rush to get somewhere, we came to an intersection and the light turned red right before we got there. She looks at me and says “run it, just go.” Being the good grandson I am, I do so. As we pass, she waves to the oncoming cars and says “toodle-loo!”

3. Lol, tree donkeys

My grandfather used to hide behind the BBQ on his patio and shoot squirrels with a super-soaker when they would try to loot the bird feeder. He would yell “Not today tree donkeys” then come back in the kitchen chuckling to himself. I miss that goofy man.

4. Straight up

Maybe not the funniest thing he’s said, but my 93 year old grandfather when he had his picture taken: “I wish I had a camera. I’d take a picture of myself every day because I’m so damn handsome.”

5. Miscommunication

My grandparents told me this story one time. It was their “coming of age” when they realized they’re two old people now.

Grandpa is trying to get past my grandmother who is loading pre made pies into the freezer. Grandpa says, “Can I get by?”

Grandma grabs her pies and says, “What kind?”

Grandpa checks his watch and says, “Quarter after three”.

Both said they didn’t even realize it until ten minutes later, when my grandpa called my grandma old.

6. Tattoo=Jerk

I’m an EMT, we were taking a 90-something year old man to the ER, and as I was putting the cuff on his arm to get a blood pressure, he sees my tattoo on the inside of my forearm and asks “is that a tattoo?” I say “yes it is, sir” he looks me in the eye and says “well then, that makes you a jerk!” and didn’t say another word to me. I wasn’t even mad, it was too funny.

7. I like big butts and I cannot lie

My grandfather explaining the story of how he met my grandma: “I saw her walking down the street with her friends and picked out the greatest butt.” Short and sweet.

People Recount Their First Kiss Horror Stories

It’s a rite of passage for young people. And old people too I guess, depending on when you started getting busy. Regardless of the age, everyone remembers their first kiss. Maybe it was great. Maybe it was terrible.

Take a look at the 13 AskReddit entries below to see if your experience measures up.

1. Teeth!

I was 14 and she grabbed me and she whacked her teeth against mine. She was pretty embarrassed because it was her first kiss also so we just laughed it off and tried again. I ended up dating that girl for almost 2 years and then she cheated on me.

2. Alaskan Air

Homecoming freshman year. Wore too much makeup and a horrible velvet dress. The hottest guy on the swim team had been flirting with me for weeks. Went outside to his car to say goodbye. He kissed me and I all but melted. Like a bad paperback romance the world went silent all I could feel were his warm lips and the cool alaskan air. When he pulled back he said ” you really need to learn how to do that.” It was horrible…

3. Sleep-Away Camp

Summer sleep-away camp. I was maybe 10 or 11. The boys came over for a dance. One of them danced with me and held my hand all night. I tried to get him to sit with me and “look at the stars.” As soon as he looked up I grabbed him and gave him a peck on the lips. He literally RAN away.

What a f**king tease.

4. Drool

Truth or dare in 7th grade. It was her first kiss too, and we just sort of sloppily drooled all over each other while 6 other kids awkwardly cheered for us. Then the weird kid Nick, ate a caterpillar.

5. Just breathe

…My family and her family have been close for a long time and we’d known each other forever. Our families were on vacation together in Key West, Florida and we were alone one night on a pier. We had both hinted at liking each other for a while and it just happened. I passed out about five seconds after the kiss (the kiss lasted about thirty seconds). I woke up on a park bench with her sitting over me asking if I was okay. She and I are still close (in a more than friendship way) to this day, but sadly due to distance it’s never gone anywhere.

6. Church Dance

It was horrible. I thought you HAD to French kiss and I thought that meant doing all sorts of flipping and twirling motions with my tongue. I was 13 at a church dance and I convinced a girl to be my girlfriend. From there it was 45 seconds of the most distrusting and overbearing tongue assault known to mankind. Within 15 hours she broke up with me. I learned that kissing should be a bit more civil.

7. Watch the nose

It went absolutely horrible. It was a first kiss for both of us. Both of us closed our eyes, he opened his mouth and I didn’t. The result was a tongue up my nose. I do not recommend the experience.

Woman Edits People’s Toxic Exes out of Photos for a Cheap Price

Now this is a brilliant business idea!

A Twitter user who goes by the handle @hexappeal has become quite popular lately because she will perform a very important service for you for an incredibly reasonable price.

She’ll use her impressive photo editing skills to remove your terrible ex from old photos. For only $15 a pop, you never have to look at awful person ever again! She originally started out with a $10 fee, but as demand grows, you gotta do what you gotta do.

Here’s a little message about the price increase.

 

Here’s another great example of her work.

Boyfriend? What boyfriend? I don’t remember that guy. It’s like in Back to the Future when Marty McFly’s family is slowly disappearing from that snapshot. Except this time it can be permanent!

I’m sure a lot of us could do a halfway-decent Photoshop edit to try to remove those toxic folks from our memories forever, but this woman has some serious skills, so why not throw a little cash her way and she’ll do a bang-up job? Don’t be a cheapskate, okay? You’ll thank me later.

Sometimes, social media can really be used for good.

Is this a million-dollar idea, or what? Heck, it might even be a billion-dollar idea…

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15 Brutally Funny Tweets About Married Life

Marriage is a beautiful union between two people where all your dreams immediately come true…right?

Well, maybe it’s not exactly the fairy tale it’s made out to be…

Or maybe these people just have really good senses of humor and want to put their partners on blast?

Either way, these tweets are winners!

1. What’s it gonna be?

2. It’s over!

3. Pretty much everything.

4. Things are heating up.

5. She’s winning this one.

6. I can’t believe it’s not working.

7. Son of a…

8. Now what…?

9. I’m gonna score!

10. What am I doing here?

11. Sparks are flying.

12. Not in my house!

13. The natural progression of things.

14. No, I can’t.

15. Where the hell were you?

Those seem pretty on point…even though I’m not married. But hey, they seem right on the money to me!

What do you think? Do these tweets illustrate marriage realistically?

Share your thoughts with us in the comments!

The post 15 Brutally Funny Tweets About Married Life appeared first on UberFacts.

Take a Look at These ‘What Women Don’t Want From Men’ Tweets to Keep Up to Speed

Now’s the time for all the guys out there to listen up. The ladies are pretty sick and tired of being treated the way they have been, so they’ve taken to Twitter to vent their frustrations.

There is a lot of good information in here that I think everyone can benefit from.

So let’s take a look at these ‘What Women Don’t Want From Men’ tweets to educate ourselves.

1. First and foremost.

2. Just don’t do it.

3. They’re your kids, dude.

4. Kinda funny, isn’t it?

5. We’re equal, huh?

6. You’re full of it.

7. That doesn’t impress them.

8. This is a good one.

9. Don’t owe you anything.

10. And then there are these guys…

Pretty interesting and informative, if I do say so myself.

Ladies and gentlemen, what do you think? Do these things affect your relationships?

Tell us about it in the comments!

The post Take a Look at These ‘What Women Don’t Want From Men’ Tweets to Keep Up to Speed appeared first on UberFacts.

Enjoy These Interesting Facts About Sex, Love, and Relationships

A big part of our lives is spent pursuing love and another big part of it is dealing with love once we’ve caught it. And I’m talking about the good, the bad, and the ugly.

But, hey, that’s what makes us human!

Let’s quit beating around the bush and get into the good stuff!

1. Mystery men.

Photo Credit: did you know?

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2. Poor ferrets…

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3. That’s a shocker.

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4. Does this describe you?

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5. Not a huge surprise.

Photo Credit: did you know?

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6. Get it on!

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7. C’mon, guys…

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8. Yet another reason to do the deed.

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9. Think about that…

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10. Take it all in.

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Some pretty good facts from all across the spectrum, if I do say so myself.

We hope you enjoyed them!

The post Enjoy These Interesting Facts About Sex, Love, and Relationships appeared first on UberFacts.

People Open up About the Worst Dates They’ve Ever Had

Have you ever had a truly terrible date? One that was a disaster start to finish and made you never want to go out with anyone ever again?

I’m sure you have…and so have these folks on Twitter.

This is the question that got everything going.

Let’s take a look at the responses.

1. Get outta there!

2. Won’t be a second date.

3. Still haunted.

4. Mama’s boy.

5. Sounds like a catch!

6. No way.

7. Ouch!

8. Okay, this is the worst ever.

9. Homicidal maniac.

10. Yeah, I’ve had enough.

11. Maybe he was a nice guy?

12. That’s weird.

13. We don’t want you to be hysterical.

14. What a story!

We’re begging you! Tell us about your awful dates in the comments!

These kinds of stories give us LIFE!

The post People Open up About the Worst Dates They’ve Ever Had appeared first on UberFacts.

15 Funny Tweets About the Realities of Marriage

Isn’t it always like this? Husbands and wives going back and forth, making each other crazy and in love at the same time.

Hey, that’s life!

Let’s take a look at some hysterical tweets about married life in all its glory.

1. Can you please move?

2. How could you?

3. Not anymore…

4. Always listening.

5. An embarrassment to the family.

6. A lot of deep sighs.

7. Thank God for your wife.

8. I can’t pretend.

9. I’ll sleep standing up tonight.

10. A very confident man.

11. You can die first.

12. From the grave.

13. Gonna be a shoot out.

14. Has it really, though?

15. That took a while.

Married life…you gotta love it!

Tell us a funny story about something your spouse has done recently. Let’s put them on blast!

The post 15 Funny Tweets About the Realities of Marriage appeared first on UberFacts.

15 Funny Tweets About the Realities of Marriage

Isn’t it always like this? Husbands and wives going back and forth, making each other crazy and in love at the same time.

Hey, that’s life!

Let’s take a look at some hysterical tweets about married life in all its glory.

1. Can you please move?

2. How could you?

3. Not anymore…

4. Always listening.

5. An embarrassment to the family.

6. A lot of deep sighs.

7. Thank God for your wife.

8. I can’t pretend.

9. I’ll sleep standing up tonight.

10. A very confident man.

11. You can die first.

12. From the grave.

13. Gonna be a shoot out.

14. Has it really, though?

15. That took a while.

Married life…you gotta love it!

Tell us a funny story about something your spouse has done recently. Let’s put them on blast!

The post 15 Funny Tweets About the Realities of Marriage appeared first on UberFacts.