There are two types of man humor – the jokes they think are funny, and the jokes that are legitimately funny.
I’m sorry to report that, for most men, the first type outnumber the second on most days – but that’s why we’re here, ready to give these 11 guys a round of applause.
Positive reinforcement!
11. That’s the way to a human heart.
Crosses all genders, ages, modes of being. Everybody loves THAT.
I’m no expert on women but making them a grilled cheese with the butter spread all the way to the edges is undefeated.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) September 1, 2020
10. That’s below the belt. Literally.
I think the wife technically deserves the credit for the laugh, here.
My wife, ladies and gentlemen pic.twitter.com/dH66tWoeYe
— Henpecked Hal (@HenpeckedHal) November 16, 2020
9. At least you’re alive, honey!
There are probably other fantasies that play out differently. But this one… your memory is shot.
WIFE: can’t wait until we’re old and sitting on the porch so I can tell you all my stories again because you won’t remember any of them
ME: wait… your retirement fantasy is I have dementia?
— Stone (@StoneAgeRadio13) August 28, 2020
8. Now that’s some REAL real love.
It’s not always pretty, but there you have it.
DATING: can’t wait to see you again
MARRIAGE: part of your knee was on my side of the bed again last night
— mark (@TheCatWhisprer) August 21, 2020
7. Communication is key!
It sounds like they could use some work.
Romance is weird. My wife said she wanted fantasy play but got angry when I handed her the wizard beard & 20 sided dice
— ADHoliDean (@ADHDeanASL) August 19, 2020
6. I fail to see the problem.
This drives my husband absolutely mad.
Me:
My wife:
Me:
Wife:
Me:
Wife:
Me:
Wife:
Me: (stands up)
Wife: While you’re up….— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) October 16, 2020
5. Sometimes being a grownup is cool.
Only sometimes, though.
Wife: I made a cake.
Me: What's the occasion?
Wife: I wanted cake.
The best occasion of all.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) October 28, 2020
4. Another 10% is doing the same thing in the house.
And if one of you IS gone, texting “when will you be home?”
10% of marriage is texting each other “Where are you?” from inside the same store.
— The Dad Briefs
(@SladeWentworth) July 31, 2020
3. Ain’t that the truth.
The coupons are how they get ya. And then the smell gets ya. And not in a good way.
My wife got a Yankee Candle coupon and I’m not sure if we can afford to save this much money.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) September 9, 2020
2. I think he knew that wasn’t what they meant.
But it’s funnier this way, I suppose.
Him: Do you sleep with a fan?
Me: I'd say my wife mostly likes me, but fan is pushing it
— The Dad (@thedad) October 17, 2020
1. I mean, we need to know.
Yes, we know we already checked.
[on my deathbed]
Me: *motioning for my wife to come closer* ᴬᴿᴱ ʸᴼᵁ ˢᵁᴿᴱ ᴵ ᴸᴼᶜᴷᴱᴰ ᵀᴴᴱ ᶜᴬᴿ
— Eternal Samnation (@portmanteauface) September 2, 2020
These made me snicker way more than I’d care to.
Are you chuckling? Yeah you are.
Tell us which one got to you in the comments!
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