Entire Internet is Disturbed by Revelation That St. Louis Slices Bagels Like Bread

St. Louis, MO is apparently a world unto itself… and not just because they’ve got the world-famous Arch.

Photo Credit: iStock

The reason we’re talking about the Gateway City today is because of what they do to these delicious circles of boiled and baked bread.

Photo Credit: iStock

Yes, we’re talking about the humble bagel – the chewy, Jewish-American breakfast staple traditionally served sliced in half, smeared with cream cheese and maybe with a bit of lox and capers?

YUM!

But this is apparently what happens to bagels in St. Louis:

Yes. Apparently in St. Louis they treat bagels like they’re loaves of bread. And the internet is NOT having it.

Because why people… why?!?

Does anybody like St. Louis anyway? (Don’t answer that St. Louisians. You don’t count.)

Although it’s probably too late for this idea…

“Bread slicing” bagels almost feels like a hate crime.

But maybe Christina has an answer. Because what is this St. Louis Bread Company and how can we stop them?

Even Panera weighed in and we’re even more confused! Why are you divided about this?

Quick fun fact many people outside of St. Louis don’t know. In St. Louis, Panera is actually called St. Louis Bread Company. And they have bread slicers in every location for just this reason.

Needless to say, employees suffer as a result.

The struggle is real.

Real fucking real.

Nothing is going to solve this predicament. St. Louis bagel eaters are still going to act like god damn monsters, “bread slicing” their bagels from now until eternity.

But none of us has to like it. Or ever go to St. Louis again.

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