Funny Tweets About How Time Has No Meaning Anymore

Do you have the time? I mean, you probably do have some extra time right now. But like, do you know what time it is? Does anybody? If Twitter is any indication, the answer to that question is a firm “No.”

When your usual routine gets thrown off, it’s amazing how quickly your entire outlook goes into disarray. Lucky for us, some of the responses are really funny. Like these!

15. Dish, girl

It’s kinda like how geological time is measured in rock layers.

14. Ok, Google

This is all just a part of their plot to make us fully rely on them.

13. Underwhen

There’s a joke here about being “brief” that, to my eternal shame, I can’t seem to find.

12. Handy rhymes

Then another 90 days of fear,
For each month of the entire year

11. Time keeps on slippin’

Slippin’, slippin’, into the futuuuuure.

10. TGIW

Every day is Friday when nobody cares.

9. Homewreckers

I think maybe it’s Thruzeday?

8. It never ends

It’s a band, I think?

7. It all makes sense

Ushering in a new era.

6. Back to the future

A simpler time when time was literally simpler.

5. Nailed it

I mean, you have a clock and a calendar on your phone but ok.

4. A hard day’s night

I should be sleepin’ like a log.

3. Superimposition

It’s every day, every day.

2. Classic

Tell ’em, Peters.

1. April showers bring indifference

At least I’m the only one who has to deal with me.

Hope you enjoyed that list! But how long have you been looking at it? A couple of minutes? A week? WHAT YEAR IS IT?!

Any tips for keeping to a good schedule?

Drop ’em in the comments.

The post Funny Tweets About How Time Has No Meaning Anymore appeared first on UberFacts.

10 Ways To Stop Wasting Time Today

I’m writing this article mostly because boy, could I waste less time while trying to work on the internet. Technology, man. It gives and it takes away – like, it sucks more of your life away than Count Rugan dreamed was possible.

Photo Credit: did you know?

Let’s not waste anymore and get on with it, shall we?

#10. Get enough sleep

Photo Credit: Pixabay

I know, it can be easier said than done to press pause on Netflix, but time management really begins with having a fresh, rested body first thing in the morning.

#9. Beware of the time suck

Photo Credit: Pixabay

Facebook. Television. Cable News. Podcasts. We all have our secret vices, the things that end up stealing more time from our day than anything else. The easiest way to make sure they don’t derail your productivity is to recognize yours and avoid starting/opening it at all.

#8. Put time in your planner for planning

Photo Credit: Pixabay

Carve out 10-15 minutes per day to make a to-do list, bullet journal, or whatever works for you so that you’re ready to tackle whatever needs to be done.

#7. Use the alarms on your phone

Photo Credit: Pixabay

Alarms will jolt you out of whatever you’re focused on and remind you that it’s time to move on to something else. Bonus tip: listen to them!

#6. Schedule yourself free time

Photo Credit: Pixabay

No one can work every waking hour of every day. Make sure you’re giving yourself time to stare off into space, check out a movie, or take a walk – you’ll end up being more productive because of the break.

#5. Break your goals into chunks

Photo Credit: Pixabay

Instead of thinking “I need to get ready for work,” start with “I need to brush my teeth” and then move onto “I need to get dressed,” and so on.

#4. Assume a worst-case scenario

Photo Credit: Pixabay

If there is somewhere you absolutely have to be on time, like an airport or a meeting, think through the worst-case scenario when deciding when to leave. If you account for things like potential traffic or your outfit not coming together just right, you’re more likely to have the extra time that can help you relax.

#3. Focus on a specific time

Photo Credit: Pixabay

Instead of thinking “I need to leave for work at 8:30,” retrain your brain to think about 8:00 as your deadline instead.

#2. Mix up your alarms

Photo Credit: Pixabay

If you’ve been using the same generic tone for everything, your brain might be getting to the point where it can tune it out as something unimportant. Try picking a different sound or song for differing tasks, or just a new sound to help jar you out of your complacency.

#1. Adjust your clock

Photo Credit: Pixabay

Some people set all of the clocks in their house ahead, but in the age of cellphones, this doesn’t work quite as well. Another trick to try: switch the clocks in your house to the kind that actually tick. There’s something about watching the time literally tick away that can spur you into action.

h/t: AddituteMag

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